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My instinct is always to ease the tension, smooth over an awkward situation, make everybody happy. But I’m trying to work on my people-pleasing tendencies. They haven’t done much for me. Turns out, never rocking the boat doesn’t mean you’re a great sailor. Only means it takes longer to learn who will toss you overboard at the first sign of rough waters.
But him approaching me one afternoon with a business proposal that involved being hunted? Shocking. Now I’m wondering if I should have asked more questions before jumping in with my whole pussy.
LMAO
Realistically, I should only be weighing the odds of ending up a story on a true crime podcast. But, because I’m me, I’m worrying I might be boring to hunt, or worse, when he catches me, boring to fuck. Whatever money’s left after paying off the loans should probably go toward therapy.
Gabriela liked this
Sydney is certain that moving in with a man who hunts women for sexual sport is a fast track to having true crime podcasters talking about how my smile lit up the room.
And she'd be right
“I assume he told you that he doesn’t do aftercare?” Margot pulls my attention back to her. I nod. The fact that he highlighted that line in the contract—along with a few others reiterating that I should not expect any emotional support—seemed unnecessarily dick-ish.
Hmm...
I don’t want to get away. I want to get closer. But I shouldn’t. I can’t. I wiggle and thrash, hoping he thinks I’m trying to escape. Oh no, help, not the sexy lumberjack lawyer. Not his magic fingers. Ahhhhh.
Cheating Piece of Shit: I’ve been thinking about us. And I’ve been thinking about fucking your boss. The thought shouldn’t be so satisfying, but it is. Maybe I’m not that sweet.
LMA real
Can a pussy purr? Because mine is right now. If she had her way, I’d backflip out of this tree, stick the landing, and ask Shane to finish what he started last night.
LMAO
“Any plans for the weekend?” His tone is cordial. Fucking your ex-wife better than you ever did.
Slay
Staring down at her flushed cheeks as she snarls up at me, I don’t feel like a predator who finally caught its prey. I feel like I’ve somehow gotten another predator on their back, and the power balance could change at any instant.
“Do you like Real Estate Wreck?” I blurt. That makes her spin. “That’s what you’re going to watch? I’m obsessed with that show.” “Really?” I try to sound surprised. Like I didn’t hear her talking to her best friend about it during one of the dozens of coffee dates I observed. Like I didn’t DVR three seasons, just in case she might want to watch it while she was here. I never planned on watching it with her, but right now, the idea is appealing. “Watch it with me.”
from the zipper, she zips her bag shut again. “Thanks for this.” She gestures at the now-bare floor between us. “Hunting down runaway pens is less embarrassing with company.” Rising, she brushes her hands off on her leggings. I follow suit, rubbing my hands on my jeans. “Happy to hunt with you anytime.” Fuck. Poor choice of words.
LMAO sure you are
For the last week, whether he hunts me that day or not, he invites me to watch an episode of Real Estate Wreck every evening, and I accept. He wasn’t kidding about liking the show; it’s the only thing on his DVR.
LMAO
“How did you learn to do that?” On second thought, I will not answer anything. I refuse to tell Claire the truth. After she agreed to the contract, I had a minor moment of panic that my existing sexual knowledge might be inadequate. So I called the first professional I had hunted and hired her to give me a sex refresher course—making it clear that this would not be a “hands-on” teaching experience. She showed up with a silicone vagina and a few books, and I took detailed notes. While it’s nice to hear the crash course was a wise investment, there’s no good way to tell Claire that I fingered a
...more
DAMN HES OBSESSED
I glare at him. “Don’t be a fucking jackass.” “I’m not,” he protests. “I’m trying to help her. Two against one is better odds.” Claire laughs but still looks shy. “This is not a multiplayer game.” Each word is clipped, and I hope my stare conveys what I’m not saying verbally. Shut the fuck up. “I would hope not.” He scoffs. “Because there’s kink, and then there’s incest.”
LMAO
“There isn’t a taste on Earth better than your cunt.”
And they say romance is dead
“Claire? What are you doing here?” Keith. I’m frozen, unable to turn and look behind me. Exhaling hard through his nose, Shane leans all the way back, lifting his chin in that nod men do to greet each other. “Hi, Keith. Naomi.” Kill me now.
OH MY GOD
“Tell your pussy break time’s over,” he says as he slides down until he’s flat on his back. “Put her on my face.”
He has such a way with words
