It Was Me All Along: A Memoir

by Andie Mitchell

“Can you do it today? Can you make it through today without bingeing? Just today, and tomorrow we’ll reconsider?” The writer was struck, as was I in reading it over. “Uh, yes. I mean, yeah—yes, I can get through today,” she stumbled out in concession. In that moment, she realized that this phrase would be her mantra. It would be the question she’d ask herself, day in and day out, when she felt herself falling back into old habits. Can you do it today? The notion of just trying to take each day as it came. The commitment to the present moment, and only the present moment, without worrying about the big and daunting picture of all the days that followed. The mustering of strength and dedication for now, if not later. That question stayed with me after having read her article. And at that moment, sitting in my car outside the YMCA at the beginning of my own weight loss journey, it floated into my head like a banner attached to a blimp in the sky. Can you exercise today, Andie? Not tomorrow, not the next day, not even a month from now. Today? Eat the best you can, work your plus-sized heart out … today? And, I found, I could.