The Dawn of the Cursed Queen (Gods & Monsters, #3)

by Amber V. Nicole

“He just needs time, my queen. He deserves that.”

“You two are the most stubborn creatures I have ever encountered in this universe or the next.”

A new ache bloomed in my chest as another piece of my heart fractured. He hadn’t even tried to see me.

There was only so much one person could take, and I had given Samkiel a lifetime of reasons not to want me. Because of me, we no longer had our mark or mate bond tethering us.

“Without him? There is no without him. He’ll come back, and if he doesn’t, I will hunt him down and drag him back if I have to.

Dianna and I were going through something, but she would always be my first priority. Instead of saving the realms, I would level each of them if it meant keeping her safe.

“So she is the one?” “My one and only,”

“We didn’t get along at first, but we were forced to work together. So I spent time with her every day, and whatever intrigue I felt for her grew like an ember until it burned me from the inside out. She is so fierce and brave and courageous. She knew who I was, knew the stories, and didn’t care. Her loyalty knows no bounds, and she risked everything for her sister. Only a fool would not love a person that astounding. She drives me absolutely insane. Sometimes in a wonderful way, other times she’s downright maddening.”

“I swear to gods, Samkiel if you shush me one more time…”

Samkiel, World Ender, Destruction Incarnate, and the legendary God King throughout all twelve realms, was kneeling before me. His hand was raised, and he held a shimmering silver ring that held a rhombus-cut, clear jewel.

“I wanted to do this differently, but I am afraid that creature signaled more to come. There is no perfect place to do this. No place would be perfect enough for you, but anywhere you are is perfect for me.”

“This is how it is done on Onuna, yes? They get down on one knee and confess their undying love.” Worry creased his brow. “Am I doing this wrong?”

“Because I love you.”

He loved me, and I was the worst thing for him.

“I have told you a thousand times before that there is no horrible life with you, only without.”

“Yes, we fought. People who love each other deeply do that. Yes, you hurt me by lying to me, but I know where that comes from.”

“Don’t do that. Don’t you dare shut me out again, not like on Rashearim, not now, not ever.”

“Yes, because you hurt me.” His voice raised a fraction. “You hurt me, Dianna. I needed time to think, not because I planned on leaving you. I needed time to process and make this for you,”

“You heard me. You’re a coward. You are afraid of this, and what it means, so you’re doing what you always do. Shutting down, protecting yourself because you think I’ll hurt you. You’re running because this scares you.” He stomped out of the ruined building, the dirt kicking up around his feet. “And you don’t get to run away when you get scared. You don’t get to abandon me when it’s tough, Dianna. Never again.”

“You promised not to do this. When we were on that damn balcony, you promised that you’d stay no matter what. You promised you’d never abandon me again.”

“You ask too much of me, and I don’t know if I can give it.”

“So removing your actual soul is alright, but this? Marriage? Is ...

“I’ll hurt you.” My voice came out as small and damned as I felt. “Then hurt me.” Samkiel’s eyes softened, and he stepped closer, his body almost flush with mine. “But don’t leave me.”

I knew I’d burn oceans to mist, skies to dust, and worlds to rubble to keep him near. Love was too dull of a word for what I felt for him and one I hated to say. It meant nothing.

I understood now and knew the true loss of another’s soulmate was one of the worst pains known in any realm.

There were no limits I would not breach for him. I had ripped him from death. These things would not take him from me.

I’d make anything that touched him dead, and I’d enjoy it.

These damned creatures were threatening to steal him from me.

“I’d die for you,”

“I love you. You are it for me and have been for a very long time.”

Samkiel and I were fighting, yet our eyes were only on each other.

“Well, you’re it ...

“I’m stupid.” I kicked my foot out, stomping on the chomping head that neared me. “I was wrong. I would rather fight every day with you than be without you.”

“You found me.” “You find me, I find you,” I panted back, handing him his sword. It collapsed into his ring as soon as it touched his hand. “That’s how we work.”

“Ask me again,”

“What?” “Ask me again.”

There was nothing romantic about this, but I stared at him and felt nothing but warmth. He was the one person who never abandoned me, no matter how cruel, vicious, or mean I was.

The truth was he was too good for me, and I was more comfortable leaving. It was safer. I could protect my heart, my soul. The problem was, neither of them was mine any longer. They were his and had been for some time now. He had picked up the pieces, bit by jagged, broken bit, and put them back together. Somehow, he had healed them and made me whole. So even if my love was a dark, powerful, brutal thing, it was still just love.

“You’re right about a lot of things. I run when things get hard. Sometimes, I lock my emotions down and everyone out. I think the absolute worst, so yes, you leaving made sense. When you sent me away, I thought you had finally realized how damaged and broken I was and decided you deserved better. So I was going to deal with it. I had made up my mind that no matter what, I would still help you get your family back and save this blasted realm you care so much for. Even if you hated me for lying to you and hurting you again and wanted nothing to do with me.”

“So, when you asked, it scared me. It wasn’t what I was expecting. Samkiel, you are not anything I could have ever expected. You prove my worst insecurities wrong at every turn and make me see how good some people are. You make me feel. At times, being in this relationship with you is hard for me because I care so much. I don’t want to mess up, mess us up, and I don’t know what I’m doing. So yes, you’re right. I am a coward because quitting seemed safer. But then the ground split, and you disappeared. I was reminded once again that being without you is worse.”

“You’re right, too.” “About which part?” I asked. “You are an idiot.”

And don’t think for one second I deserve anyone better than you. There is no one better than you. There never has been. No one is more courageous or godsdamn selfless.

“How could I not be completely and utterly in love with you?”

“You love me?” My heart melted. “With everything I am and everything I ever will be.”

He had offered me his heart, and in return, I’d give him the broken pieces of mine. It was more than love for us, and I knew now it always had been.

“Dianna. Ayla. Akrai. My world. My life. My love. Will you marry me?”

“I’m kidding. It’s yes. It’s a thousand times, yes.”

“It’s a yes. Now give me my damned ring.”

He rubbed his thumb across the stone, and silver armor flowed over my body, covering me from head to toe. Samkiel did not just give me a ring. He offered me protection, too.

“Nothing. It is just nice to have an equal in every way. You are perfect.”