Variation

by Rebecca Yarros

The second her gaze lifted to lock with mine, I forgot how to fucking breathe, let alone think. I’d never been hit by lightning, but I bet this was what it felt like.

Observant could easily be mistaken for quiet, especially with that many siblings around.

By the end of that summer, she was my best friend. By the end of the next, she hated me. And I didn’t blame her.

“Because”—she straightened her shoulders—“you’re my biological mother.”

“Hudson, do me a favor and at least say goodbye to her this time before you go, would you? It would be a shame for me to go to jail for acting on a decade’s worth of intrusive thoughts when it comes to your demise.”

“If you want to see me in uniform, all you have to do is ask.” A playful smile tugged at his lips.

“Same team. Stop trying to draw my blood. Leaving Allie the first time bled me dry already.”

“So while sure, it makes me jealous that there are a couple of guys here who have seen you naked, I actually feel sorry for them because they’ll never have you again.” I tugged her close and let the words fly like the revelation they were. “But I will. First means nothing. Last means everything

“Truth always differs depending on who’s telling the story, and in complicated situations, there are countless variations. But when it comes to that summer, in every single variant, I’m the asshole who wasn’t strong enough to hold on to her.”

Messy is good, love. Messy is where the best parts of life happen. You don’t have to be in control at all times. It’s okay if you fall apart. I promise I will be right here to put you back together if you just let me.”