The Ex Vows

by Jessica Joyce

Finally, he says, “It’s not what you think it is.” “It doesn’t matter what I think.” “It actually does,” he says, his voice low. “Very much.”

“Buddy, huh?” he murmurs, fighting a smile. “What happened to shithead?” “You’ve graduated since you’ve been such a good boy,” I say dryly. “I thought my shithead was an endearment.” “Derogatory, I’m sorry to tell you.”

Eli can’t see my heart, and it’s for the better because he’d see his name everywhere in it.

“Yes,” Eli says. “That’s why it matters. Because I’m so in love with you that I feel like I can’t breathe. I think it every time I look at you, every time you let me in or you laugh or you look at me like I mean something to you. I know it’s fucking messy, and I know you hate that, but it’s also true.”