Why is it so common to find stylistic differences among partners in close relationships? I suspect it is a paradox built into our system of self-arranged marriage. We often choose our partners on the basis of romantic attraction, which is sparked by cultural difference. But as we settle in for the long haul, we expect friendly companionship. And that is most often found in cultural similarity. So the seeds of disappointment are sown in the same field as those of love. Yet persistent struggles of the sort described are common among partners from the same country, the same town— even the same
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