CÉLINE DION sings her songs like they owe her money. She sings her songs like she’s a street-walkin’ cheetah with a heart full of napalm. She sings as though the song were Sisyphus and she were the boulder. She came here to kick ass and sing songs, and she’s about out of ass. She sings the songs that make the whole world cower in the storm cellar. She sings as though she intends to fell the mighty oak and drink every drop of the sea. PUT CÉLINE DION IN SUPER SMASH BROS. She sings like the floor, the ceiling, and also the very air she breathes is lava. She sings these songs like she has a very
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