A Place of Healing: Wrestling with the Mysteries of Suffering, Pain, and God's Sovereignty

by Joni Eareckson Tada

I need a battlefield Jesus at my side down here in the dangerous, often messy trenches of daily life. I need Jesus the rescuer, ready to wade through pain, death, and hell itself to find me, grasp my hand, and bring me safely through. There will be a time very soon, I hope, when I will once again enjoy the casual stroll through the garden with Him, admiring the dew drops on the roses. But for right now, if I am to “endure hardship … like a good soldier” as 2 Timothy 2:3 mandates, I need a comrade in arms, a strong commander to take charge of my private war. And that is exactly who He is, and what He has done.

“Lloyd,” I said slowly. “I did resolve it. I resolved the issue with one simple Bible verse. Psalm 37:4: ‘Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.’”4 Lloyd shot me a quick look. I knew what he was thinking. It would seem like that kind of verse would be a guarantee of healing! “I can read your thoughts, Lloyd,” I said with a smile, “but let me explain.” And so, for the remaining time we talked, I reflected on how after that Katherine Kuhlman crusade, I had embarked on a quest to delight myself in the Lord. “I started reading the Bible more and praying and asking God to reveal Himself,” I told him. “I asked Him to show me His heart, give me His passion for the lost, keep me from temptation, and help me be a better witness. “In the process of my pursuit, I just ate God up. I made it my goal to simply delight myself in Him. And not with the purpose of holding back on a couple of desires I’d hoped He would quickly fulfill once I delighted myself in Him. No, I didn’t center on what God could do for me. Not how He could please me, but how I could please Him. I kept putting my wants and wishes in check and, instead, made certain my goal was simply to enjoy the Lord being … the Lord! And you’ll never guess what happened!” Lloyd shook his head and didn’t try to guess. “God gave me the desires of my heart!” I said. Lloyd looked at my wheelchair, then back at my face. He was listening very intently. “It’s true,” I said. “He really did. The t...

I’m so glad that Mary didn’t save her special treasure for a rainy day. I’m so grateful she didn’t decide to leave it locked in a cask like an untouchable family heirloom. I’m so thankful she broke it open and poured it out on the one and only one who was worth it all and more. What Mary did with that perfume speaks to me. There is something about “pouring it all out” in service, dedication, and love to Christ that makes your life truly fragrant. And not only your life—you become a fragrant offering, reminding the Father of all that Jesus sacrificed when He walked on earth. There’s something sweet and precious about cracking open your heart and giving your affection to the Savior in the midst of a difficult or painful situation that takes a simple testimony like yours and pushes it over the top. Because there’s nothing like a song of praise rising out of brokenness that brings glory to our God.

Don’t leave your love sealed, “safe” and placed on a high shelf.

Just recently, as I was reading in Matthew 25, the following little paraphrase took shape in my mind. Then the King will say to those on his right, “Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was discouraged, and you gave Me a smile of encouragement and a kind word.… I was grieving and you sent Me a note and bouquet of spring flowers.… I was confused and anxious, and you took me to Starbucks and gave me your counsel over a caramel macchiato.… I was lonely, and you took Me out to lunch at IHOP.… I was frightened about preparing my taxes, but you showed Me what to do and where to go.… I was a child who wanted to get out of the city and go to Bible camp, and you paid My way.” Then the righteous will answer him, “Lord, when did we see You discouraged and speak kindly to You? When did we send You flowers or take You to Starbucks or buy You lunch? When did we help you with Your taxes or pay Your way to Bible camp?” The King will reply, “I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for Me.”

God isn’t asking you to be thankful. He’s asking you to give thanks. There’s a big difference. One response involves emotions, the other your choices, your decisions about a situation, your intent, your “step of faith.”

Did you get that? We are commanded to sing while we always give thanks to God for everything! Earlier we read about giving thanks “in” all things, but in this passage, God tells us to always give thanks “for” everything. That little word “for” can encompass an awful lot of pain and suffering. But maybe that’s why God reminds us to sing.

So my friend, no matter if your emotions are up or down, follow the Lord’s lead today. May the mind of Christ your Savior live in you from day to day, and ask God to simply put a song in your heart as you pick up your cross daily and follow Him. Singing is a perspective changer. But nothing happens until you open your mouth, by faith, and hit that first note!

A quarter-inch of good news, received from the Lord with a grateful heart, can bring as much joy as half a mile of good news to an indifferent or cynical heart.

Now when people see me in my wheelchair bound, no one knows (though I am still) the joy that I have found. My arms they will not move again, my legs they do not walk, without my special speaking valve, I cannot even talk. These simple facts mean nothing, these things that you can see, it’s the unseen changes made inside, by Him who lives in me. No person knows contentment such as He has given me, unless they gave their heart to Him, then waited patiently, for Him to do the shaping part, the way He did for me.

I’m always looking to see what God’s Word has to say about physical limitations. And when you study the life of Jesus, you have to stop and consider that although our Savior did not have a physical disability per se, He did handicap Himself when He came to earth. Boy, did He ever. How can I say that for sure? Well, the dictionary defines “handicap” as any difficulty that is imposed on a superior person so as to hamper or disadvantage him, making that person more equal with others. Certainly, if we use that definition, then Jesus was handicapped. Think of it! On one hand, the fullness of God dwelt in Christ, yet on the other hand He “made Himself nothing.” He emptied Himself, taking the very nature of a servant. Talk about handicaps! Can you imagine a greater one? To be God on one hand, and yet to make Himself nothing! That is one severe limitation which, you would think, would have hampered our Lord or put Him at a disadvantage. Jesus, the Master Architect of the entire universe, designed suns and stars, galaxies and planets. When He handicapped Himself, He made Himself a carpenter on earth, limiting Himself to designing common wooden chairs, stools, tables, and yokes for necks of oxen. Jesus was also the one who spoke the Word, creating everything around us. But this same Jesus who spoke time and space into being handicapped Himself on earth, choosing instead to speak to prostitutes, lepers, and sinners. Jesus, the one who since Satan’s fall had despised pain and sufferin...