Redshirts

by John Scalzi

“In other words, crew deaths are a feature, not a bug,” Cassaway said, dryly.

“Yes, death by away team. Very effective on this ship,” Jenkins said.

This is the starship Enterprise. It’s fictional. It was on a science fictional drama series. And so are we.”

“In retrospect, the plan has significant logistical issues,” Finn admitted. “On the other hand, it worked. You can’t argue with success.” “Sure you can,” Dahl said, “when it’s based on stupidity.”

“The five main characters,” Hanson amended. “If you blow up the ship, they’ll just get another ship. A better ship. They’ll just call it the Intrepid-A or something like that. It’s happened on other science fiction shows.”

“No, that we’re on a bad one,” Hanson said. “As far as I can tell, the show we’re on is pretty much a blatant rip-off of that show Jenkins told us about.” “Star Wars,” Hester said. “Star Trek,” Hanson said. “There was a Star Wars, though. It was different.”

For all we know, this”—he scrolled up on the phone screen to find a label—“this Wikipedia information database here is compiled by complete idiots.”

You don’t win by getting through all your life not having done anything.