Ready or Not

by Cara Bastone

“I love my apartment. It’s…the exact place I want to go home to.”

“Hello? To what do I owe this afternoon phone call? Is this a butt dial? Do I have the honor of speaking with Shep’s fantastic ass right now?” “Do you really think it’s fantastic?” he asks. “I always thought it was just average.” “You’re twisted backward to look at it right now, aren’t you?” “No! Yes. Is it fantastic?” “It’s quite nice.” “Man, thanks. I should randomly call you in the middle of the workweek more often.”

“It’s…kind of a long story actually.” When people say that, they actually mean that it’s a regular-length story that they don’t want to tell you right now.

A secret is only a secret if no one knows about it. What’s a secret that everyone knows but no one talks about? It’s shame.

“Eve, for as long as I can remember I have always wanted to be as close as possible to you.”

“Being with you is the only thing I’ve ever really wanted.”