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“I don’t want fifty more girls,” I replied, twisting back to find her still watching me. “I just want that girl.”
“Does it matter?” I countered, needing to regain some ground I had lost to this powerhouse of a girl. “We both know that you’ll be calling me ‘baby’ by the end of the day.”
I was twelve years old and a frontline soldier in the war that raged within my family home. The enemy I found myself up against was bigger and stronger, and my ally had abandoned me when I needed him most.
“He’s going to kill you, Mam,” I lashed out. “Don’t you get that? Can’t you hear me? You’re going to die in this house.
She might think that she loved all of her children, but she certainly didn’t, or couldn’t, love me. Darren was her firstborn and favorite, Ollie was her sweet and affectionate baby, Tadhg was her mischievous rogue, and Shannon was her only daughter. That left me. The spare.
And with those words, my mother cut me deeper and more viciously than my father ever had. Ever could.
“Loyal, kind, forgiving, fearless, nurturer, protector.” He smiled up at me. “Joseph acted… He took on a role.… He was the father of the lost.”
“The quintessential lost boy.” Her lips grazed mine as she spoke. “Don’t worry, Peter Pan, I’ll be your Wendy.”
“Because the only time that I allow myself to feel anything is when I’m with you.”
“Don’t hate me, Molloy,” Joey mumbled, falling into the passenger seat the moment I let him go to open the car door. “You’re all I have to wake up for in the morning.”

