Queer Romance with an Asexual MC

Romance stories that include an asexual character as one of the MCs or one of the characters in the main romance relationship. This can be m/m, f/f, trans*, bi, gender queer, poly, etc, or hetero-romantic (m/f).

As asexuality is part of LGBTQIA, all the romantic possibilities, including aromantic, are included here under the "queer" umbrella. The main factor for this list is that one or more of the characters in the main romance relationship identify or can be identified on the ace spectrum. Happy reading!
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169 books · 158 voters · list created October 14th, 2014 by ttg (votes) .
126 likes · 
Lists are re-scored approximately every 5 minutes.


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Comments Showing 1-43 of 43 (43 new)

dateDown arrow    newest »

Heather K (dentist in my spare time) I don't think A Gentleman's Position should be on this list!


Valerie ❈M/M Romance Junkie❈ I don't think Part & Parcel should be on this list. Neither MC is asexual.


message 3: by Ariana (new)

Ariana Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think A Gentleman's Position should be on this list!"

I totally agree. Who the heck is asexual in that? Or did I read another book?


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Ariana wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think A Gentleman's Position should be on this list!"

I totally agree. Who the heck is asexual in that? Or did I read another b..."


I can't think of a single person!


message 5: by Vanessa (new)

Vanessa North Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think A Gentleman's Position should be on this list!"

Richard is demisexual, per KJ Charles. The word didn't exist in the regency era, but his characterization is consistent with demisexuality.


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Vanessa wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think A Gentleman's Position should be on this list!"

Richard is demisexual, per KJ Charles. The word didn't exist in the regen..."


Hmm... never even considered that. That actually makes sense.


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Valerie ❈M/M Romance Junkie❈ wrote: "I don't think Part & Parcel should be on this list. Neither MC is asexual."

Is this the one where the side character was asexual? I think this list is only for asexual MCs, right? I didn't read this one.


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Denise wrote: "Receipts: https://twitter.com/kj_charles/status..."

I don't really keep up with anyone on twitter so I probably would never even considered that Richard was demisexual. I can totally see it now that i think about it. I wonder how many readers actually picked that one up.


message 10: by Denise (new)

Denise Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Denise wrote: "Receipts: https://twitter.com/kj_charles/status..."

I don't really keep up with anyone on twitter so I probably would never even considered that Richard was demisexu..."


To be honest I had to google the term when I saw it drift past on my feed for this book! Always happy to get a little more schooled though... Just wanted to add the direct evidence of her saying it on the comments of the list because of librarian tidiness. :)


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Denise wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Denise wrote: "Receipts: https://twitter.com/kj_charles/status..."

I don't really keep up with anyone on twitter so I probably would ne..."


I actually knew what demisexuality was, but I didn't really think about it with Richard. Now that I do think about it, I really see it!


message 12: by Ariana (new)

Ariana Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Vanessa wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think A Gentleman's Position should be on this list!"

Richard is demisexual, per KJ Charles. The word didn't ex..."


After googling the term again ( I do admit I keep forgetting what means what in this world of newish terms for sexual preferences) and thinking about Richard I can see where KJ Charles was heading with this. But although demi-sexual is on the asexual scale is isn't the same. So I guess this book still shouldn't be on this list?


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Ariana wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Vanessa wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think A Gentleman's Position should be on this list!"

Richard is d..."


I think it is considered part of the asexual umbrella. I'm trying hard to keep up with all the terms too! It's always a learning experience for me, and I keep evolving the more I read. :)


message 14: by Vanessa (new)

Vanessa North Yup, demi is definitely under the asexual umbrella.

El from Just Love Romance has a great post up today about asexuality, if anyone is interested in reading it. :)
https://justloveromance.wordpress.com...


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Vanessa wrote: "Yup, demi is definitely under the asexual umbrella.

El from Just Love Romance has a great post up today about asexuality, if anyone is interested in reading it. :)
https://justloveromance.wordpre..."


Just read it and it is certainly worth the read!

I'm a frequent reader of the Aven forums, which is where I get most of my asexuality info. I also recommend people check there to see real people talking about issues or concerns that they are having.

I try to learn a lot about asexuality because, out of the whole QUILTBAG spectrum, asexuality is the one that I struggle with understanding the most.


Valerie ❈M/M Romance Junkie❈ Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Valerie ❈M/M Romance Junkie❈ wrote: "I don't think Part & Parcel should be on this list. Neither MC is asexual."

Is this the one where the side character was asexual? I think this ..."

Yes. Only a side character is asexual.


message 17: by ttg (last edited Jun 15, 2016 11:50AM) (new)

ttg Valerie ❈M/M Romance Junkie❈ wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Valerie ❈M/M Romance Junkie❈ wrote: "I don't think Part & Parcel should be on this list. Neither MC is asexual."

Is this the one where ..."


I started this list, but am unsure how to remove that book. This list should be for main characters only. (It can be disappointing for readers to come here and read a book, but find ace representation only in side characters. It's like "we're only allowed to be sidekicks" kind of thing. There's a separate list for aces in fiction that can be a better catch-all.


message 18: by Denise (new)

Denise It's under the edit tab, but I'm not sure if only librarians can do it, or list owners as well. Would you like me to remove it for you?


message 19: by ttg (new)

ttg Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Ariana wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Vanessa wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think A Gentleman's Position should be on this list!..."

It's an interesting tension that I think the ace community just needs to grapple with and embrace. I was just at an ace discussion group this weekend where there was tension over "why does demi need a category? It's it the most like "normal" relationships?" But that direction can lead to erasing demisexuality, and once again, falling into a trap where we erase one section of a marginalized/underrepresented group. For those on the other side of the ace spectrum, demisexuality can be frustrating because they may have more "passing" privilege. It's something that's not going to go away--we just need to name this tension and maintain a goal of building a welcoming space for *everyone*, and acknowledging that all parts of this spectrum exist, and each have their own layers and things they live with.

If KJ didn't say it though, it would be easy to not see it, and I think that's the blurred line that demis grapple with within our culture. That's why maintaining spaces where they can say, "This is me," is important so they don't get lost in cultural assumptions that they are something else.


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) ttg wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Ariana wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Vanessa wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think [book:A Gentleman..."

Really good poinst, ttg. I really appreciate your input.


message 21: by ttg (new)

ttg Denise wrote: "It's under the edit tab, but I'm not sure if only librarians can do it, or list owners as well. Would you like me to remove it for you?"

That would be great if you could. I don't see an "edit" option for me. (I can only edit the list description) so it looks like I don't have the credentials. Thank you!


message 22: by Denise (new)

Denise Okay, Part & Parcel has been removed from the list due to being miscategorized, as it does not have an asexual main character.


message 23: by ttg (new)

ttg Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "ttg wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Ariana wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "Vanessa wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I don't think [book..."

No worries. I think the situation related to KJ's book would be similar if someone was an "unnamed" ace, right? Like, they just went through the story and, say they were homo-romantic, and kissed or held hands, but in this specific case, weren't geared towards having sex. For someone looking or aware, they could say, "This character reads ace to me," but for someone not looking or unfamiliar, they could say, "This was a 'sweet' romance. Low heat. I'm imagining hot sexy times for later," and they can move forward with no more thoughts about it. (Then a twitter debates opens up about "Is XX MC ace or not?", etc. Then another debate comes up about whether or not we should label things, and so on.) One thing I know is that we gain so much power from having "named" characters--ones who are labeled whatever the label we're looking for or wishing to see. I know why KJ didn't use the term, so no big deal there, but also know there are probably authors out there who are discouraged from naming identities in their blurbs, and I hope they feel welcome to name it because it's one of the biggest signals to those of us looking desperately for signals.


message 24: by ttg (new)

ttg Denise wrote: "Okay, Part & Parcel has been removed from the list due to being miscategorized, as it does not have an asexual main character."

Thanks! And for Roux fans reading this, sorry! I know it's really AWESOME Roux included an ace side character. This list is just specific for main characters/someone within the main couple. A) For readers looking for ace romance, it's more accurate this way and B) authors writing ace romance with an ace spectrum MC are making a choice to write something that is really underrepresented in queer romance and this list honors that choice and that space. Thank you for understanding!

Two lists that honor ace characters in fiction (MC or side characters) are: Asexuals in Fiction and Ace is the place. Check them out, and if you know of related stories with ace character, please add! :-)


message 25: by Josy (new)

Josy Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I actually knew what demisexuality was, but I didn't really think about it with Richard. Now that I do think about it, I really see it!"

I just started the audio of A Gentleman's Position. I didn't consider Richard demisexual either but it's good to listen to the rest of the book with that knowledge.


message 26: by Heather K (dentist in my spare time) (last edited Jun 16, 2016 07:51AM) (new)

Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Josy wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "I actually knew what demisexuality was, but I didn't really think about it with Richard. Now that I do think about it, I really see it!"

I just started..."


I honestly wouldn't have picked up on it, and I'm even aware of demisexuality! I think that has a lot to do with the fact that many people, especially lots of females that I'm friends with, don't feel comfortable or have the desire to engage in sex without having a romantic/emotional connection. Most do not have/feel a need for a name for it. I guess many of them would actually be demisexual, but totally unaware of it.


message 27: by Josy (new)

Josy That are exactly my thoughts, Heather! But now that I know I noticed a few things. For instance: "... Richard found it impossible to fuck when he didn't care (for his partner)..." I wouldn't have noticed this at all without knowing Richard is demisexual.


message 28: by Reader S. (new)

Reader S. Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "especially lots of females that I'm friends with, don't feel comfortable or have the desire to engage in sex without having a romantic/emotional connection. Most do not have/feel a need for a name for it. I guess many of them would actually be demisexual, but totally unaware of it."

Or then they're like me. I do feel sexually attracted to total strangers (a lot!) but I find it hard to imagine I would actually act on it without some sort of connection. And that's definitely not demi, that's just a decision to "listen to reason". I guess it has to do with expectations, I'd like it to lead to something more.


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) Sarah_loves_books wrote: "Heather K (dentist in my spare time) wrote: "especially lots of females that I'm friends with, don't feel comfortable or have the desire to engage in sex without having a romantic/emotional connect..."

Yeah, it certainly depends on how they feel, which I'm not really privy to! I just know based on vague things that they tell me.


message 30: by Lexxi Kitty (new)

Lexxi Kitty re: 'Romance stories' - that's important, right? I was going down the list to see if there was something I might find interesting to read and spotted a short story I love but . . . it isn't a romance. It stars a ace/aro main character. The Faerie Godmother's Apprentice Wore Green - currently #30 on the list, though lists can shift.


message 31: by Lori S. (new)

Lori S. Finding Your Feet (Toronto Connections #2) is on the list twice: at #24 and #50.


message 32: by BWT (Belen) (new)

BWT (Belen) Antisocial by Heidi Cullinan is on the list twice.


message 33: by ttg (new)

ttg BWT (Belen) wrote: "Antisocial by Heidi Cullinan is on the list twice."

Thanks for the tip. Maybe someone who is a GR librarian can help with removing one of them. (I don't have the status.)


Heather K (dentist in my spare time) ttg wrote: "BWT (Belen) wrote: "Antisocial by Heidi Cullinan is on the list twice."

Thanks for the tip. Maybe someone who is a GR librarian can help with removing one of them. (I don't have the status.)"


Done :)


message 35: by Frank (new)

Frank Nice to see fellow authors writing asexual MCs, since ace and even aro books are badly needed. Great list, and thank you for sharing! :)


message 36: by Aaron (last edited Jul 19, 2019 09:23PM) (new)

Aaron Any way to add a list where the MCs are actually ace? Or divide the demis in another list or something? (demis DO/can have sexual feelings, which is why I think it's weird that it's mixed in with A-sexuals)
Cuz I've read a couple on here hoping it wouldnt be all about the ''end-game'' (sex), and they almost always end up having intercourse and I'd rather not read that if possible...

Or just if someone knows a mm romance list (or your shelf) with little to no sex? (or implied or barely talked about, as in a page or less of tasteful-none-awkward sexual things). Cuz the mm genre seems to be way to overwhelmed with sexual fantasies and that's not ever my cup of tea. I can also settle for any other realistic asexual roamnce though, I guess.

Thanks and sorry if that annoys anyone


message 37: by Josy (last edited Jul 20, 2019 07:30AM) (new)

Josy Aaron wrote: "Any way to add a list where the MCs are actually ace? Or divide the demis in another list or something? (demis DO/can have sexual feelings, which is why I think it's weird that it's mixed in with A..."

I think demisexual characters belong on this list because they are on the ace spectrum but I do get where you are coming from because I, too, wish we had more asexual characters to choose from and I'd like my sexual orientation represented more often in the books I read.

Here are some other lists you might want to look at (they are not strictly M/M, though):
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/1...
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/9...
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/1...
https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/1...

Are you a member of the M/M Romance Group? They have a bookshelf for sexcontent-non-explicit with currently 743 books and a bookshelf for sexcontent-sweet-no-sex with currently 680 books on it. Of course most of them don't feature asexual characters but this might be useful you if you want to avoid on-page sex.
There's also this list I found online where you can sort and filter to find whatever you are interested in. The downside is, that only authors themselves can request their books to be added to it and I don't think most of them know about this list. http://claudiearseneault.com/?page_id...

edit: Personally, I highly recommend Upside Down by N.R. Walker and How to Be a Normal Person by T.J. Klune (both authors are ace themselves) if you haven't read them yet.


message 38: by Aaron (new)

Aaron Josy wrote: "Aaron wrote: "Any way to add a list where the MCs are actually ace? Or divide the demis in another list or something? (demis DO/can have sexual feelings, which is why I think it's weird that it's m..."

Oh thanks a lot buddy, I'll go there right now.


message 39: by Josy (new)

Josy You are very welcome, Aaron :) Fingers crossed that you'll find some great books that are to your taste!


message 40: by Aaron (new)

Aaron Josy wrote: "You are very welcome, Aaron :) Fingers crossed that you'll find some great books that are to your taste!"

Yeah ahah


message 41: by Josy (new)

Josy Aaron wrote: "Josy wrote: "You are very welcome, Aaron :) Fingers crossed that you'll find some great books that are to your taste!"

Yeah ahah"


I found another list
https://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/... although I'm pretty sure it's mostly the same books as on the other lists.
And I forgot to mention this series https://www.goodreads.com/series/2510...
I haven't read the books yet and not all of them are published yet but it got good reviews from aces and allos :). As far as I understand, it's a self-portrait of the author himself.


message 42: by Aaron (new)

Aaron Oh, I'll have to look into those as well then, thanks a lot buddy, you're quite helpful, damn. :o


message 43: by Josy (new)

Josy LOL! You are very welcome :)


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