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Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships

4.21  ·  Rating details ·  3,522 ratings  ·  199 reviews
In today's world, freedom is our basic condition, and until we learn to live with that freedom, and learn to live by ourselves and with ourselves, we are denying ourselves the possibility of finding love and happiness with someone else.

Love can only happen through freedom and in conjunction with a deep respect for ourselves and the other. Is it possible to be alone and not
Paperback, 256 pages
Published December 13th 2002 by St. Martin's Griffin (first published 2001)
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4.21  · 
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 ·  3,522 ratings  ·  199 reviews

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Sep 18, 2007 rated it really liked it
yata! I have finally finished this book! I could only read a little of this book at a time. I would read a few pages and then have to put down the book and think about what I had read. Did I agree with Osho's views? What were my views on the issue? All in all, it was a good exercise for me to go through. It's amazing how much you learn about yourself when you question your own views.
Oct 26, 2009 rated it really liked it
Few of my fav passages from the book: :
- "It is beautiful to be alone, it is also beautiful to to be in love, to be with people. And they are complementary, not contradictory."
- " can only enjoy aloneness ONLY if you can enjoy relationships. It is relationship that creates the need for aloneness, it is a rhythm."
- "A person who knows how to be alone is never lonely. People who don't know how to alone, they are lonely."
- "Great music is a sythesis between sound and silence." (like love a
May 06, 2011 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: wishlist
This book is not easy to read. Because of what society have taught us. I read this book few pages at the time and then I had to put it down because this new information was too overwhelming. In a good way though. Deeper I went into this book, more delighted and happy I felt. I tried meditation and I experienced my meditation honeymoon as Osho mentioned would happen. And after honeymoon phase, meditation was harder, yes. But I didn't gave up because I felt that Osho has guided me well and gave me ...more
Jeannie Mancini
Nov 27, 2013 rated it it was amazing
I have very recently been introduced to Osho. A Zen Buddhist Guru that was popular in the 1970s, Acharaya Rajneesh, popularly known as Osho, was an international Indian mystic, and spiritual teacher with an insight that could only be described as “enlightened”. Although Osho penned hundreds of books before he died in 1990, “Love, Freedom, Aloneness: A Koan of Relationships” was my first experience getting to know him and his teachings. Within just a few pages my heart started racing and my own t ...more
Jun 21, 2010 rated it it was amazing
I loved this book. It was hard to understand at first...I think you really have to approach it with a completely open mind and just really listen to what he's saying. I got a little disinterested when he went on a 'we should all live in small communes' tangent (only because it's basically impossible to even imagine it in today's world), but otherwise his anecdotes were amusing and full of very wise insights that only further drove his points home.

Everything in the title of this book you will co
Mar 13, 2012 rated it really liked it
Recommends it for: spirituality seekers
Recommended to Janet by: Goodreads
It's quite repetitive. It's at times a bit eccentric. It's not really well written. (Although this was explained in the "About the Author" section at the end. This book was NOT "written", but transcribed from 35 years' worth of Osho's extemporaneous talks, which explains the repetition and average writing.) It's definitely not for the conservative, especially Christian, set.

That being's one of the most insightful and valuable books I've read in my 46 years. How awesome to have my pers
Sep 26, 2010 marked it as to-read
i have this book on order and wish i had the presence of mind to preview it more extensively before buying it. i found these "gems" in the google books preview:

"Man is the only being on Earth who has freedom. A dog is born a dog, will live like a dog, will die like a dog; there is no freedom...This is where man is totally different. This is the dignity of man, his specialness in existence, his uniqueness."

"A dog is going to remain a dog his whole life, he is not going to evolve, grow. Yes, he wi
Dec 19, 2013 rated it liked it
Shelves: nonfiction
If you ask me if I enjoy this book, the answer is no. It made me uncomfortable, it cemented some of my knowledge and believes and it shook some others. But if you ask me if this book is a good read, I would say yes, for the same reason.

To me, a good read doesn't always comfort and provide you all the answers that you readily agree with. A good read makes you feel and think, it makes you question your prior knowledge; a good read might contain theses that you vehemently disagree with, and yet can
Oct 28, 2008 rated it it was amazing
This book challenged me to re-question my paradigm as well as provided so much insights and ideas to contemplate on. One of the powerful things I found from this piece of profound work was the statement "one is enough unto oneself, and one doesn't require anything else". Thanks Osho
SJ Loria
Jan 24, 2016 rated it did not like it
He's 100% wrong about how children should be raised. He's a spiritual charlatan and convicted criminal. He makes some interesting points about relationships.

Be wary the advice of theorists instead of practitioners. Having finished Love, Freedom, and Aloneness, I thought maybe I shouldn’t look this guy up before I write a view of the theories he advocates in order to give it a fair chance. But. I had to see if he was a monk or lived a normal life. Answer, monk. Not in the traditional sense, based
Dave Malone
Jul 22, 2012 rated it liked it
Many concepts in this book are fabulous. And I have recommended it to folks (especially in their twenties and thirties) who are in relationships who need to explore what it means to be alone.

The necessity for alone time is so important, and Osho delves into this. He has some great anecdotes which have stayed with me today, and I highly recommend this book. The only drawbacks (be aware) is his repetition of language in getting across a concept and some far-out ideas about abstinence and communal
Nadia A
Dec 24, 2012 rated it it was amazing
I loved this book. It forced me to unlearn and challenge things I've been taught by society and the norms its imposed on us and we've imposed on ourselves. Simply put, it totally changed my perspective on the meanings of love, freedom and aloneness. For the better. I would definitely read this book again. And again.
Mar 08, 2015 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I didn't like it

I agree we can have different points of view of the diverse aspects of life, but this guy is against EVERYTHING!

I really don't think that all human race is egocentric and faking love!

I'll keep what was useful (2 paragraphs of the entire book) and throw the rest away!
Jan 30, 2009 rated it it was amazing
i seem to rate books really high, but this was a really good book. this was my first time reading osho. i resonated a lot with what he said about love starting from the person first and that we must love ourselves before we can love others. love tied to being alone and freedom.
Dec 13, 2010 rated it it was amazing
I am keeping this book as a primary source in my library that I may re-read and reference from time to time. I feel it's the kind of book that is necessary to read in different phases in one's life and still be able to gather new information from. It isn't stuffy either. It's written in a simplistic style that relates to all ages and across all lifestyles. This book doesn't preach, which is why I love it and put it in my favorite section. It instead, gives you some food for thought. There is rea ...more
Ahmad Asmar
Jan 14, 2014 rated it it was ok
1) He has spoken of good and solid points like: fear making. Fear that is made by both political and theological authorities.
2) he was so deep when he talked about the self love, selfishness, illusion of love and social serving.
3) his talk about aloneness is deep and insightful.
4) vague and contradictory analysis of love.
5) attacking sex and defending it on contradictory terms depending on his contradictory position of love.
6) attacking ideologies while adhering one.
7) the idea of commune sex
Jan 24, 2008 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: relationships
I discovered the true meaning of love, that there is a difference between being alone and being lonely. In addition, I learned that through aloneness and meditation you can discover yourself and ultimately true bliss.
Jan 17, 2012 rated it it was amazing
One of the most enlightening, life altering books I've ever been fortunate enough to read.
Kay F.
Nov 07, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: favorites, self-care
Amazing book! This book took me a while to read because of how dense it is. However, I really appreciated reading a little bit at a time. This book is beautiful. Osho had some really great points about love throughout. Some of it was controversial, but I suggest reading it with an open mind. I find myself going back to read certain sections over and over again because some of it really moved me in a way I didn't it would. A special friend of mine recommended me this book, and I couldn't have rea ...more
Mehmet Kır
Feb 19, 2013 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2011
I read this book with Turkish edition two years ago. During reading, i underlined some important sentences to understand this book.
Generally,Osho's ideas and books seem different to me,but some ideas of Osho are logical. I remember a quote from this book:
"People don't realize that they don't know what love is."
Emily Johnson
Jul 18, 2012 rated it liked it
good but a bit repetitive.
Sep 14, 2010 is currently reading it
humbling, make me feel good about myself.
Jun 03, 2016 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I couldn't even finish this one. Just wasn't working for me.
Mar 30, 2008 rated it it was amazing
i've purchased three copies of this fantastically written, empowering book - yet not one sits upon my shelves. and that is because it is a treasure to be shared.
Feb 15, 2009 rated it really liked it
This book did, and still continues, to shift the way I look at relationships.
Sach Singh
Dec 19, 2012 rated it it was amazing
This is an amazing book which, I think, explains an extremely important topic very well. So much suffering is caused by the confusions that this book addresses to resolve. Osho never fails! :)
May 19, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: selfcare
“Think before you desire a thing. There is every possibility that it will be fulfilled, and then you will suffer.”
Mark Allen
Mar 03, 2018 rated it did not like it
Osho was an Indian spiritual guru who spread his teaching in Asia and the US until his death in 1990. His advocacy of more open sexual relationships was perhaps ahead of its time and stems from the overarching theme of love and happiness. Osho eshews family and marriage and this book wholly relates to his teaching of meditation and love of oneself. Everything is about oneself and to love oneself is above all things.

It's claptrap.

I fully agree with peace and love. Nothing epitomises my own belie
Sep 20, 2014 rated it really liked it
guided by a deep feeling of aloneness that i am experiencing these days, i started reading this book. osho has ideas i both agree and disagree with. the ones i liked most are those saying that one cannot have opinions on things they did not experienced. in a world full of people thinking something about everything, it is really interesting to find someone that thinks everyone is stupid because they have no experience on most things they talk about. which i also think is true.

for me, it is a time
Nov 29, 2011 rated it really liked it
Wow, this book. Lots of good insight, lots of controversial thoughts. It was a bit dense therefore it's a little hard to remember exactly what Osho said but I will attempt to summarize it nonetheless:

You have to be happy with yourself, with every aspect of yourself before you can be in a happy relationship. Aloneness is beautiful and it is during this time that we should grow, explore, feel pain, feel love, feel joy.

At a point in my life where it's a little hard to be alone and not feel lonely
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inlighting 3 24 Jun 10, 2012 07:22PM  

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Rajneesh (born Chandra Mohan Jain, 11 December 1931 – 19 January 1990) and latter rebranded as Osho was leader of the Rajneesh movement. During his lifetime he was viewed as a controversial new religious movement leader and mystic.

In the 1960s he traveled throughout India as a public speaker and was a vocal critic of socialism, Mahatma Gandhi, and Hindu religious orthodoxy.

Rajneesh emphasized the
“I also teach you to love yourself first. It has nothing to do with ego. In fact, love is such a light that the darkness of the ego cannot exist in it at all. If you love others, if your love is focused on others, you will live in darkness. Turn your light toward yourself first, become a light unto yourself first. Let the light dispel your inner darkness, your inner weakness. Let love make you a tremendous power, a spiritual force.” 27 likes
“Love is never a relationship; love is relating. It is always a river, flowing, unending. Love knows no full stop; the honeymoon begins but never ends. It is not like a novel that starts at a certain point and ends at a certain point. It is an ongoing phenomenon. Lovers end, love continues—it is a continuum. It is a verb, not a noun. And why do we reduce the beauty of relating to relationship? Why are we in such a hurry? Because to relate is insecure, and relationship is a security. Relationship has a certainty; relating is just a meeting of two strangers, maybe just an overnight stay and in the morning we say goodbye. Who knows what is going to happen tomorrow? And we are so afraid that we want to make it certain, we want to make it predictable. We would like tomorrow to be according to our ideas; we don’t allow it freedom to have its own say. So we immediately reduce every verb to a noun. You” 26 likes
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