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The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips and Advice for Dads-to-Be

3.75  ·  Rating details ·  2,495 Ratings  ·  247 Reviews
This indispensable book explores the emotional, financial, and even physical changes the father-to-be may experience during his partner’s pregnancy. Written in an easy-to-absorb format and filled with sound advice and practical tips for men on such topics as, how to make sense of your conflicting emotions, how pregnancy affects your sex life, and how to start a college fun ...more
Hardcover, Third Edition, 352 pages
Published September 28th 2010 by Abbeville Press (first published 1995)
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Community Reviews

(showing 1-30)
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Randy
Dec 04, 2008 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: New Fathers who are incredibly stupid and/or bored
Kind of a lot of extraneous information gets in the way of what should be a much shorter book. This book insulted my intelligence. I guess this wasn't really what I was looking for. It's too broad to be of any real use to me. I much prefer brief, no-bullshit specific advice on things that are not subjective. This just came across as a really well-meaning collection of good things which don't really match up with each other. Who wants to sift through that? Especially new fathers or fathers to be. ...more
Scott Rhee
So, it’s the big day. My wife and I are going to the hospital to be admitted, and in a few short hours (hopefully) we will be delivering a healthy baby girl into the world, and I have to say that I’m much less nervous than I would have been had I not read Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash’s excellent daddy-to-be prep guidebook “The Expectant Father”.

I’m still nervous, of course, but many of my fears and confusions have been allayed somewhat by the thorough and straightforward research done by Brot
...more
Margaret
Jun 08, 2017 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonfiction
I bought this book for my husband to read as we're expecting our first baby. We both read it. I found it generic, he found it insulting and humorous.

Here are some of his favorite tips for dads:
--If you need a break because you're overwhelmed by your wife's pregnancy and emotional state, take a break from her. Go to the beach. Take a vacation on your own. (This will probably become one of the many in-jokes in our pregnancy.)
--You're a hero if you go to the doctor's appointments with her. (When we
...more
Josh
When you’re having a baby, almost everyone whose had one has some advice for you, whether you want it or not. Unfortunately, it’s still considered rude in our society to tell those people to shut up.
This book is kind of like that. It’s more or less one person’s opinions and experience with a few studies thrown in. The difference between this and some lady you see at a restaurant is that you can tell the book to shut up.
I ended up skimming quite a bit of the book (Is it bad that I skipped the “wh
...more
Mohammed Al-Garawi
I'm not even gonna waste my time reviewing this useless sad excuse of a book. I'm intellectually offended by how commercial this book is.
Madasi
Oct 28, 2007 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Any expectant dads
This book is fantastic. The first time you and your wife become pregnant, books will start appearing out of thin air telling her every minute detail of what is happening each day of the pregnancy, what the baby is doing now, how big it is, what might go wrong now, and how to deal with it. If you are like is, you'll end up with 2.3 copies of each book on the subject.
This book is different, because it is for the father. It not only tells you what is going on with your wife, and future offspring,
...more
Shelly Johnson
Jun 08, 2015 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I bought this for my husband, but wound up really enjoying it for myself! It was really interesting to hear about pregnancy from the male perspective, something that is really lacking in probably most books of this type. I thought the author was a good balance between a "real" parent, with perhaps a little "hippie" thrown in there. For example, he pointed out that most practitioners don't love birth plans... I suspected that, but from all the other mommy blogs and books you would think EVERYONE ...more
Tony
Jun 06, 2012 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Reading this book while watching my wife rest during labor has been one of the most eye-opening experiences of my life. I wish I would have read this book as soon as we discovered we were pregnant but the insight was still very well-received. All dads-to-be should read this!
Zetagilgamesh
Feb 26, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Well written, solid and insightful. I can say that the medical information provided is pretty spot on in all regards and that this book should be required reading for all expecting dads.
Chad Warner
Nov 16, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
An informative book for expectant fathers. Each chapter deals with a different stage of pregnancy, and tells what’s happening with the woman (physically and emotionally), what’s happening with the baby, and what’s happening with you (the man). The author references many medical and psychological studies, but also adds anecdotes from his own experience, which provides just enough humor.

The author’s stance is that men shouldn’t bottle up their feelings, but should be open to expressing them, and s
...more
Michael Hicks
Jun 10, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: bought
Armin Brott's THE EXPECTANT FATHER is a terrific resource for new daddies preparing for the biggest, and most rewarding, change in their life.

Brott is direct and straight-forward in his presentations, and his information is well-researched and sourced, so if you have any questions or would like to know more about the material presented, it's very easy to find his primary sources. He has also compiled a very handy Resources appendix to further one's own research into this challenging new landsca
...more
Peter Knox
Oct 04, 2016 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I read The Expectant Father as things progressed during my wife's pregnancy and with her 'estimated due date' tomorrow, I've finished just in time.

I'm sure lots of people would tell parents-to-be that if they read "just one book" it should be ___, but for dads, I don't believe there's a better book for THEM than this one.

Every chapter covers what's going on with your partner, you, and the baby that month. It touches upon what you need to be doing to prepare for the baby (financially, physically,
...more
David Marino
I love the fact that there is a book dedicated to the sorely underrepresented portion of the population known as fathers. In many pregnancy or newborn books, words for the father are usually relegated to amusing anecdotes or sidebars. The Expectant Father puts dads at the forefront (as one might anticipate).

However, for a book with such an extensive bibliography and resource section, I found much of the information inaccurate or unhelpful. Another review already mentioned this, but bumpers are o
...more
Matt
Mar 02, 2010 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition

If you are the type of person who likes information conveyed in more of a reference, straightforward, and bullet pointed manner, then this is your book of choice for all things fatherhood. I appreciated the breadth of knowledge covered (I don't think any stone was left unturned) and I certainly learned more than I could have ever hoped.

But this is also my only complaint about the book. Since every stone was unturned, there weren't any curveballs, there wasn't any long winded diatribes or rants,
...more
David
Dec 28, 2010 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parenting
This book was fantastic! It provides lots of great information and is a fun read - it is definitely a book written by a guy for guys. While written in a format such that each chapter corresponds to each month of the pregnancy, you should just read the whole thing (I did). Other than the first few pages of each chapter, which talk about how the baby, the mother and you are feeling, the rest of the chapter does not relate much to the specific month. For example, chapter three talks a lot about mon ...more
Cole Schoolland
Jun 26, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Excellent collection of practical information and advice for expectant fathers. I liked it so much, I bought a 2nd copy of a friend.

Chapters are organized by month of pregnancy. Topics discussed cover a very broad range of topics, some of which get readdressed several times as things process. Issues like: sex, finances, emotions, college-funds, what to buy and when, and good detail about various medical procedures that may or may not be involved.

I liked the focus on the relationship with your
...more
Dan Koulomzin
Mar 21, 2007 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Not only is this the best book I've seen for expectant fathers, but it might be the best book I've seen for expectant parents. Sure, the focus is on the father's relationship to the pregnancy and his partner, but this book does an excellent job of addressing the issues in an even-handed and calm manner. The author, though rather manly (an ex-marine), isn't trying to pigeon-hole fathers-to-be into some hyper-manly role... instead he takes a very modern and sensitive approach to what it means to b ...more
Harvey
Mar 01, 2014 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Brott offers fairly comprehensive advice on active fathering and is a good advocate for new dads in a sexist society that still understands women to be the primary nurturer. Brott examines the way men are socialized away from childcare and makes the case for parity. Informed by this feminist commitment, Brott explains on a month by month basis what is going on with you, your partner, and the baby as you approach birth. He's frequently amusing. A good book.
Nadia
Jul 14, 2015 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
It was okay. It was great for dad-to-be to read something geared towards him, but the tone was a little patronizing sometimes, and the author claims that male genital mutilation is okay and cool and not comparable to female genital mutilation. I don't care if you use religion or culture or whatever to justify the mutilation of your child's body, it's all mutilation forced on a minor.
Colleen
Dec 04, 2014 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I purchased this book for my husband when I was pregnant because I wanted him to be able to relate to what I was going through. I ended up reading it and found it to be very helpful for me, too! The month by month format is straightforward and I appreciated the breakdown of what the dad might be feeling, what the mom is experiencing, and how baby is developing.
Tyler
Jul 17, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book was incredibly helpful for me. I just wish I hadn't skipped over the section on C-Sections since that's what my wife ended up needing. But it has definitely helped prepare me for my wife's pregnancy and the early stages of caring for our new baby.
Mona
Great book for lending out to expectant Dads.
cubbie
Jun 16, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
imperfect and incomplete, but gentle, thoughtful, useful, hopeful.

(of course, i am still terrified. and excited. and terrified.)
Mark
May 17, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
It pretty much hit every topic I could think of when you are a first time dad expecting a baby. The book is for everyone, easy to pick up and read. The point of the book is to be the one stop shop guide for new dads. Yes, will there be parts that don't apply to you. Yes, there are points where you go, "Well no shit, who doesn't know that?"

Well someone didn't. That's why you get the book. To learn.

My favorite thing about the book was that it was reassuring. It hit the points that I would (or pos
...more
Nathan
Jul 02, 2017 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
The impending fatherhood experience has certain motifs that are easily recognizeable. While plunging into the unknown frontiers of fatherhood, I have to admit that I felt reassured that several of my unnamable frustrations were echoed across mankind.

Nevertheless, the book's content comes off as slightly generic and in need of editing on some sections.
Perhaps I should not have expected more from a guide to living an experience, as experience naturally unfolds in unique ways for each of us.

I rec
...more
Nick
Aug 14, 2017 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I enjoyed how in depth he went into things - there's often a lot of history and anthropology thrown into the various pregnancy/childbirth tips he gives. On the other side of that, however, is how long-winded some of the passages get. It gets so in depth that I found myself skimming and skipping sections, waiting for something actually useful to come up.

Definitely the best exclusively dad-oriented "what to expect" book I've seen, though.
Jeffrey Whitlock
I'm incredibly excited to be a father, and I had high hope for this book, but it didn't quite do it for me. I found the general structure—mapping the book to the months of the pregnancy—more of a gimmick than a conceptually sound way to organize the book's content. Also, the humor and general light tone was annoying.

That said, there are a few gems, so I'm glad I read it. I might even read his other books ...
Quinton
Jun 09, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Covers a lot of topics but if you actively skip the ones that do not apply to you (I did not read the sections on adoption or being a father in the military for example) then an easy and informative read. On many of these topics there is not good science or a consensus on best practices and the author does a nice job of presenting topics in a fair and transparent manner.
Ben Baker
I think the better score is 3.5 stars, but it seems that's not possible here. Very informative, but the author seemed a little hypersensitive about certain topics. Almost came across as self-serving (and even whiney) at some points. If anyone has reason to be self-serving, it's my wife. Not me.
Kirk Coco
Interesting take from the father's point of view, but I found "What to Expect When You're Expecting" to be more informative and relevant.
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“If someone hasn’t bought them for you already, I’d recommend that you rush right out and get copies of The New Father: A Dad’s Guide to the First Year and Fathering Your Toddler: A Dad’s Guide to the Second and Third Years. These books pick up where this one leaves off and continue the process of giving you the skills, knowledge, confidence, and support you’ll need to be the best possible dad. All of them are also available as e-books.” 0 likes
“Perhaps the most bizarre couvade ritual I’ve come across is one that enabled dads-to-be to literally share the pain of childbirth. Apparently, the Huichol people of Mexico used to position the dad in a tree or on the roof above his laboring wife. Ropes were tied around his testicles and with each contraction she could yank on the ropes and give her husband a taste of what she was going through. Seems a little much to me, but I’m sure there are plenty of women who would disagree.” 0 likes
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