A Way Out of Madness: Dealing with Your Family After You've Been Diagnosed with a Psychiatric Disorder

ISPS-US book series #1

by Daniel Mackler, Matthew Morrissey

Family conflict can wreak havoc on people diagnosed with psychiatric disorders. A Way Out of Madness offers guidance in resolving family conflict and taking control of your life. The book also includes personal accounts of family healing by people who were themselves psychiatrically diagnosed. Contributors Patch Adams, M.D., inspiration for Robin Williams filmJoanne Greenberg, author, I Never Promised You a Rose GardenDavid Oaks, director, MindFreedom InternationalWill Hall, co-founder, Freedom Center

176 pages, Paperback

First published March 12, 2010

About the author

I am a filmmaker, writer, and musician based in New York City. I also worked for ten years as a psychotherapist in New York, though I ended my formal therapy practice in early 2010. My writings focus on the causes, consequences, and radical significance of childhood trauma. I see childhood trauma as ranging from the extreme, which is common, to the mild, which is so much MORE common that few even notice it at all, much less call it by its proper name. I view the norm in our culture as being highly traumatized, and I view the average, and even above-average, childhood as being extremely traumatic – and the average parent as lacking both awareness of this and deep empathy for the child.

Reviews

[Rossa Forbes]

A self-help manual for psychosis, this book has got to be unique. As a parent, I am not the intended target audience for this book. This book is aimed mainly at young people in their late teens or twenties who have suffered a mental health breakdown and now have to pick up the pieces, usually under the anxious eyes of their families. I gifted this book to my son and have been stealing time with it ever since.

I am relieved that this book was written because, to be selfish about it, it makes my job easier. The chapters' authors say what I have been saying to my son, but the difference is, they've been there and they are opinionated about the role of the family as a force for both good and evil. For every mother and father who is wondering why their child is still at home on the couch after several years, the advice given here will cause you to cheer. You don't have to risk the high Expressed Emotion of clumsily nagging your child to do something with his life. Your relative is finally hearing it from people who've been there at that age: "Get a job or go back to college," "realize that your family may not be the best support for you at this stage," "you're probably spending too way much time with "mother," "learn to set limits," etc. etc. etc.

It is clear from this book that whoever has suffered a psychotic break has been victimized on some level. The book urges people to acknowledge this, but move on, even if it means distancing yourself from family. It also lists ways in which families can abuse their powers over the individual, sometimes unintentionally, other times not. I, for one, am delighted that my relative is hearing it like it is. This book is written by people who were labeled, medicated, and had a rocky start, but they figured it out and moved on. Others may disagree, but I am of the opinion that most parents want their children to be independent - one of the greatest gifts that a parent can give a child is to encourage the child stand on his or her own two feet. Often, though, the labeled child is overly attached to the parents, unconsciously feeling that he or she must please us, appease us, and generally be there for us. This self-sacrificing is a problem and most likely the reason for the label in the first place.

I would love it if my son began to mentally distance himself from me as one of the many steps on his road to independence. He needs reinforcement from outsiders. Positive views about psychosis and mental breakdowns and what to do about it are hard to find in the literature. This kind of advice has generally been promulgated by doctors and psychologists, not consumers. Dr. E. Fuller Torrey has had a monopoly on this kind of advice for far too long. He is bleak. Do you want bleak for your relative? It is time for a fresh perspective that empowers the person to heal himself. Do yourself and your relative a favor by buying this book and do let others know about it.