Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read.
Start by marking “How to Talk to Your Child About Sex: . . .and Safety and Commitment and Marriage and Abstinence” as Want to Read:
How to Talk to Your Child About Sex: . . .and Safety and Commitment and Marriage and Abstinence
Enlarge cover
Rate this book
Clear rating
Open Preview

How to Talk to Your Child About Sex: . . .and Safety and Commitment and Marriage and Abstinence

3.94  ·  Rating details ·  456 Ratings  ·  172 Reviews
How to Talk to Your Child About Sex provides thoughtful, clear, and specific guidelines concerning where, when, and most important, how to help children begin to understand sex, love and commitment from the most positive viewpoint. Provoding a series of dialogues--point-by-point discussion outlines--that have been tried and proven by thousands of families, the Eyres also g ...more
ebook, 240 pages
Published April 1st 2007 by Golden Books Adult Publishing (first published September 15th 1998)
More Details... edit details

Friend Reviews

To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up.

Reader Q&A

To ask other readers questions about How to Talk to Your Child About Sex, please sign up.

Be the first to ask a question about How to Talk to Your Child About Sex

This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Add this book to your favorite list »

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30)
filter  |  sort: default (?)  |  Rating Details
I have lots of mixed feelings about this book. Half the time, I was nodding my head, thinking, "Good idea," or "that's definitely something I need to cover." The other half, I kept thinking, "What?" and "No way."

So, to start, here's the points that I agree with from the book:
1. It is important to talk about sex with your child, and keep an open communication.

2. A good book with some simple drawings might help you explain more of the details.

3. Children need to be warned about pornography, abuse,
Jan 26, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I bought this to help me approach talking to my kids. Here are some of my thoughts...

1. While the Eyres teach that at 8 children should have the talk, and I agree it should be earlier than we probably expect, I still believe that you need to closely evaluate the child and discuss sex when the child is ready from your parental perspective. My oldest was not ready at 8. We will evaluate the others as they approach that age. An approx. 8 is a good starting point for the talk in my opinion.

2. I love
Jan 30, 2016 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This helped bolster me for our impending big talk with Moo. This married couple has had the talk with each of their nine children when they turn 8 years old, and present sex in a super positive way to give them a healthy, respectful attitude for it and that it is created to share with your spouse only. They say eight is the best age because they're curious and interested without being super embarrassed or sarcastic. I have checked out the picture book "When You Were Born" for us to read through ...more
Sally Linford
Jan 02, 2010 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Think of this of the Bible of sex ed. I rely on it so heavily to get us through "The Talk," that I take it with us on our "date" so I can refer to the scripts.

Yes, the Eyres actually give you the script--exactly what to say--on this most unfortunate topic. And, the script is perfect.

btw: They recommend reading a children's book with your child to actually communicate the bad news. I got the book from our library and was very put off by the goofy cartoon illustrations. Thinking I could find som
Dec 30, 2009 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I can't believe I'm reading this either, but the time has come.
So far it's helping me not hyperventilate at the thought of talking to my eight year old about this, but ugh...
Nov 20, 2008 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This is a great starting point for having honest, open discussions with your child about sex. The "sample" discussions are UBER cheesy and will give you a LOT of laughs (hence the 4 stars), but they do give you a good idea of how to get it all going. The book has suggestions for preparation conversations between the ages of 4 and 8, the "big talk" at eight, and then a lot of follow up discussions for various age groups until adulthood. The reasoning behind the timing is that YOU give your child ...more
Nov 08, 2008 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
*This* is the book I've been looking for. It is a complete guide to talking to your children about sex, from ages 8 to 19 (and how if you miss the 8 year old talk, it's not too late, how to adjust it, etc!). It gives complete dialogues and includes how, what, when, where, and why. I really like the analogies that you can share with your older children. You can adjust it to fit your family, wording that is more comfortable for you, etc. It's so helpful in creating the tone in which you want to te ...more
Alisha Brandon
Sep 10, 2012 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Was a great book to help my husband & I discuss sex with our children. Coming from a home where my parents talked to us once about it in 4th grade & that was it. I needed a book which helped me have a better candid discussion with my child. I didn't have the discussion with my child until almost 9- she responded wonderfully & we have discussed more about sex since. Sex should be something wonderful & special to be given to your spouse & it is great reference tool to help pare ...more
Julie Doherty
Oct 03, 2010 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I highly recommend this book to anyone who has children. We used this book as a guide when giving Eliza "the talk." It was a beautiful, wonderful experience.
Jul 06, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I worked my way slowly through this book. There's a lot to digest. I think the Eyres have it right here: communicate often with your kids (the "talk" is not just a one-and-done event) and teach your children delayed gratification. These two elements are the best way to summarize this book. I'm not sure how to incorporate their guidance for kids that weren't talked to about sex from a young age...but I think this is a great book for those who are at any stage. Wish I had read it before my oldest ...more
Jul 22, 2017 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I wish this book had been updated. Our world has changed so much since it was published that some of things our kids are faced with now must be addressed more bluntly and at a younger age.
Dec 15, 2009 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: education
I had a friend recommend this book to me many years ago and I have to admit that it is one I keep nearby to "re-read" often. After reading "Packaging Girlhood", and their expose on manipulative sexual content in books and movies and advertising presented to young girls, I feel this book is even more important. [See my review at ]

Where does your child learn about sex? From the media? From books? From movies? From peers? From older children? Wouldn't you li
Jul 18, 2012 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2012-read
From back cover... "Linda and Richard Eyre stress that it's never too soon-or too late-to start discussing sex and values with your children, and they've got proven strategies to make it easier. How to Talk to Your Child About Sex provides thoughtful, clear, specific guidance on when and, most important, how to help children begin to understand sex, love, and commitment from the most positive viewpoint possible.
Preliminary "as needed" talks with three-to eight-year-olds
The age eight Big Talk
Aug 03, 2010 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
A friend of mine recently went through a nightmarish experience with her stepson -- who happens to be the same age as my son -- that reminded me I'd been far too complacent on the subject of sex education in my house.

This book was given to me about two years ago by, of all people, my mother, who never had The Talk with me when I was growing up. Sex was a taboo subject in my parents' house. I was embarrassed when she asked me if I'd gotten around to it with my son, because we've never had the ki
Oct 20, 2011 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I would highly recommend this book to any parent. The Eyres present the topic of talking to your children about sex in a very positive way, with the attitude that sex is the most special and amazing and wonderful thing in the world and therefore should be saved for the person you love the very most after marriage. It is their positive approach that makes this book so great. This book is written for a more secular audience which I can appreciate, but as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of L ...more
Jul 25, 2013 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
It's hard to know how to rate this book. On one hand, it was extremely useful to my husband and me because it got us thinking and talking about how we want to talk with our kids about sex. Time frames for different levels of discussion, ideas for some useful analogies and explanations, a thorough-ish list of sex-related topics not to overlook.

On the other hand, the authors are trying to be all things to all people, and the result is a script for a sex talk that is very wishy washy. "Don't you th
Apr 03, 2011 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I had a hard time deciding between 3 and 4 stars for this one. Although it was a very valuable read for me (I'm much less intimidated about talking to my kids about sex now, and I'll definitely be referencing it again when the time comes to have the "big talk" with each of my kids), I didn't agree 100% with everything they recommended. It seemed to have a bit too much of a secular, politically-correct feel (almost as if they were afraid of offending someone), and in my opinion, it presented a mu ...more
Aug 03, 2010 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I thought they had some good ideas, and will probably use a couple of them. But overall, the idea of telling your child all at 8 years old - I don't think that works for every child. I know my 8 year old son isn't ready to hear most of that discussion, but then again, he is the oldest child so he is very much sheltered still. I can see why 8 might be a good age for some kids, especially since not all 3rd graders are as sheltered as my son.

Not that I'm completely naive and think that my son won'
Nov 26, 2011 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: all parents of any age
good book to gain more confidence about THE important talk every parent must do at age 7-8 with their child... You don't close doors by discussing it but open up more doors!

35) family committment teach children family values, and when talking about healthy sex feelings bring up family as it's a good concrete thing for children to see.

38) car body anaology

61) follow up talks, the talk at 8 isn't the only one

62) sex book recommendations!! I've heard good things about Where Did I Come From? Peter M
Aug 24, 2010 rated it really liked it
I just bought this book on Amazon and it arrives tomorrow. I am really concerned with the messages my children are getting, just through their every day interactions at school, with friends, media, etc., concerning sex. It's time to talk about this with Brandon for sure. Hopefully this book can help. It's written by a married couple who are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (same religion as myself) so our principles, values, and hopes are quite the same.

Okay, I read it
Jan 29, 2008 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parentingetc
Since so many of my neighbors were recommending this book and my daughter is at "that age", I thought I'd take a look at it. I thought it had some good ideas on instilling moral values but, since I have to look at things at least a little critically, I have mixed feelings overall. I'm not sure I agree with the approach they take of all this anticipation for the "big talk." I thought that might only serve to increase pressure for the parent and the child and make it anxiety-provoking. I have read ...more
Nov 11, 2010 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction
I've actually only read half of this book (the early discussions and the "big 8 year old talk"). I was shocked at first to hear that the authors encouraged the talk at 8 years of age since I was pulled out of all sex ed classes and given a 1 sentence comment by a parent when I was going to be getting married and that was it. But, after reading most of this book, I plan on checking it out again or buying it b/c it totally makes sense to inform a child about the "most beautiful, amazing thing in t ...more
May 30, 2012 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction
I'll just say that I'm a few steps closer to knowing how I want to approach these topics with my children. Good ideas here. Any parent looking for appropriate jumping-into-the-topic questions, ways to go about it will find some good solid guidance in these pages.

Having read it though, I'm even more certain than before that I can't do the scripted Eyre thing. First of all -- it drips with the cheesy-ness. I just don't know a different word for it. I agree that sex is a positive and good thing, bu
Mar 24, 2010 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I got a few great ideas from this book about approaching this difficult subject. I have to admit though, that I was a little disappointed. Their approach was more on the side of convincing children to lead moral lives rather than teaching them to lead moral lives by the principles that have been revealed in latter-days. I expected more doctrine from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. These authors are LDS and a lot of the discussions were definitely lacking some of the best truths ...more
Jan 15, 2014 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: self-help
So, I didn't finish this. But I'm still giving it 4 stars because even though it definitely has it's cheesy moments and I thought the stuff they added with their own kids was just extra and unnecessary it HAS made me feel more prepared for the upcoming talk which is exactly why I started reading it... mission accomplished.

I've read through the chapter about "the big talk" and since I have a short memory and the rest of the chapters are concerning follow-up discussions at older ages (when your c
Jan 01, 2011 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I am really glad I read this and recommend it to any parents who want to teach their kids about sex in a positive manner, while teaching them the value and importance of waiting. Although the authors are LDS this is definitely written for a broader audience. Our talks with our kids will include more about how our religious beliefs impact the way we view sex and chastity. We will also use some different words. The authors repeatedly refer to sex when speaking with their kids as "the most beautifu ...more
This book was our book club's selection for this month. The best part of this book was the picture on the back of the authors' family. 7 of 11 of them have their pants pegged!!!! Oh, it's a really "beautiful" and "awesome" picture. (You probably wouldn't understand the intended joke with the quotations unless you have already read this). I only read up through "the big talk" that they suggest having with your child at age 8. I think that this book could be very helpful for those who may be in ne ...more
Budd Dwyer
Nov 20, 2009 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: children
I have mixed feelings about this book. On the one hand, it doesn't really make the point that sex is, as Woody Allen put it, the most fun anybody can have without laughing. On the other hand, it addresses the abortion issue head on, and comes down fiercely and admirably pro-Choice, even unto the ninth month.

I still think the best way to teach kids about sex is to take them to a sperm bank. It's all there. For women, clitoral stimulation is key, and I wish this book gave young men some more info
Mar 19, 2008 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parenting
I love this book. I have used it with two of our kids and will use it again two additional times. I think the age thing differs depending on the child. However I agree that you should be talking to your child about sex before they hear about it elsewhere. I don't agree with the picture books they recommend. I took a look at all of the recommended ones and actually found one I preferred. I can't remember the name of it off hand but it is I believe, number two in a series of four picture books. Th ...more
Nov 19, 2007 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: parents
My oldest is not quite 6, but "the big talk" is something I think about already. My talk with my mom could not have been more uncomfortable or confusing and I want to be prepared with a much better plan for teaching my children about sex. This book is divided into chapters for the conversations parents should be having with children of different ages - starting as young as 3. I love the advice and the perspective in the chapters I read (I haven't read the chapters beyond talking with your 8 year ...more
« previous 1 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 next »
There are no discussion topics on this book yet. Be the first to start one »
  • The Parenting Breakthrough: Real-Life Plan to Teach Your Kids to Work, Save Money, and Be Truly Independent
  • 5 Spiritual Solutions for Everyday Parenting Challenges
  • Growing Up: Gospel Answers About Maturation and Sex
  • A Fine Young Man: What Parents, Mentors, and Educators Can Do to Shape Adolescent Boys into Exceptional Men
  • Mothering with Spiritual Power: Book of Mormon Inspirations for Raising a Righteous Family
  • Christlike Parenting: Taking the Pain Out of Parenting
  • Parenting a House United: Changing children’s hearts and behaviors by teaching self-government
  • Fifteen Minutes Outside: 365 Ways to Get Out of the House and Connect with Your Kids
  • Deal with It! A Whole New Approach to Your Body, Brain, and Life as a gURL
  • From Diapers to Dating: A Parent's Guide to Raising Sexually Healthy Children
  • How to Talk So Teens Will Listen and Listen So Teens Will Talk
  • The Price We Paid: The Extraordinary Story of the Willie and Martin Handcart Pioneers
  • 1-2-3 Magic for Christian Parents: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12
  • Being the Mom: 10 Coping Strategies I Learned by Accident Because I Had Children on Purpose
  • Things I Wish I'd Known Sooner: Personal Discoveries of a Mother of Twelve
  • The Gateway We Call Death
  • The Book of Mormon Made Easier Part 1: 1 Nephi Through Words of Mormon
  • Escaping the Endless Adolescence: How We Can Help Our Teenagers Grow Up Before They Grow Old
As writers, lecturers, and grassroots and media catalysts, Linda and Richard Eyre's mission statement is: FORTIFY FAMILIES by Popularizing Parenting, Validating Values, and Bolstering Balance. Their latest efforts in these directions are their new books, The Happy Family (St. Martins Press,), Empty Nest Parenting (Bookcraft,) and The Book of Nurturing (McGraw Hill,), and their regular appearances ...more
More about Linda Eyre...

Share This Book