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The Nine Rooms of Happiness: Loving Yourself, Finding Your Purpose, and Getting Over Life's Little Imperfections
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The Nine Rooms of Happiness: Loving Yourself, Finding Your Purpose, and Getting Over Life's Little Imperfections

3.01  ·  Rating details ·  454 Ratings  ·  57 Reviews
What Room Are You In?

Ask any woman how she's feeling. Even when things look pretty darn great from the outside, chances are that at least one thing (and it may seem minor to others) is nagging at her, making her feel less than spectacular, bringing her down: I'm too fat. My husband doesn't help enough around the house. My friend is going to be mad if I don't call her back.
Hardcover, 288 pages
Published March 2nd 2010 by Hachette Books (first published January 1st 2010)
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Apr 26, 2010 rated it did not like it
Here's what happened: the editor of Self magazine woke up one day and said "I want to publish a book, written by ME, so I can look awesome and have everyone think I have the key to happiness!" Then she found one of her doctor friends to co-sign and market it with her so she'd look legit.

Then, she okay-ed the jacket of this gobbledygook to be the most unconvincing, lame illustration I've ever SEEN. To top it off, the text is even less compelling than the skinny 2D girl in her red sundress and he
Mar 27, 2010 rated it liked it
This book will impact every reader differently based on where they are in life, their past, their present and their future. It's at times hard to follow but at minimum EVERY woman should read the epilogue. For me, it was the most meaningful and moving and takes about five minutes to read but will make you think for hours after you have read it.
Aug 06, 2012 rated it really liked it
This is a pretty easy read, with a good metaphor for thinking about happiness. There are some good mantras that they call "pearls" that are easy to remember and call upon when unhappy thoughts start to creep in. I enjoyed the book and intend to look through it again before returning it to the library to make a list of things to keep in mind.
Jul 14, 2012 rated it liked it
I really like the premise of this book and what the authors set out to do. I like the tone and the set-up. I like that the situations of real women are used. But the execution left something to be desired. Throughout the book, the women's situations are addressed, but usually in a very vague, philosophical sort of way. There were "pearls" of wisdom imparted that were overarching principles in relating to people and making changes, but there were very few suggestions of how to practically impleme ...more
Mar 26, 2012 rated it liked it
This sounded like a great book, but I was disappointed to find that many of the examples didn't really pertain to myself or my current situation. I suppose they are more broad and not specific to appeal to a wide audience of women, but I'm all about specifics. Also, in reading the few stories that did pertain to my life closely I was lost at the end not feeling like I had found a "solution/direction" to head next to solve that problem. I love the overall metaphor of the house and especially the ...more
Jun 27, 2012 rated it did not like it
Shelves: terriblebooks
This book made no impact on my life. This book listed a ton of problems. Listed a one sentence obvious answer to the problem and said now you should be happy.

It was like reading the advice column of Cosmo... or Self. Which is one of the authors, the editor of Self.

My problems weren't even listed in this book. Probably cause they chose shallow ones that could be listed in one page and spend 2 pages explaining what's wrong before the 1 word sentence.

So. Boys and girls if you'd like to know cutt
Apr 21, 2011 rated it did not like it
After reading most of the book, it's clear I'm not the target demographic. To be able to relate to most of what it discusses, you need to be married with kids, as that's what most of the examples are about. I found a couple anecdotes I related to in the chapter on the office, but aside from that, I haven't been impressed so far. I'm finishing it just for the sake of doing so, and won't be holding onto the book once I'm done.
Mary Kruft
Mar 28, 2010 rated it really liked it
Fabulous book that I believe any woman at any age could gain insight from - no matter what your occupation, relationship status, kids/no kids, etc. There are parts of this book all of us can learn from. So glad I read this!!! And it will help you stop beating yourself up about a lot of little things :)
May 09, 2010 rated it liked it
Shelves: nonfiction, 2010
I enjoyed the author's insights into happiness and found some of their "pearls" valuable and thought provoking.
I thought it was slightly awkward that co-author Catherine was referred to in the third person. The books conversational tone was nice but it felt at times like Lucy was the big sister imparting her friend's advice (Catherine says...or Catherine would tell us..)
Mar 10, 2010 rated it it was ok
I had high hopes for this book, but was disappointed. It was geared more towards someone who is not single and childless. There was not a single chapter in this book that gave me insight into my life. HUGE disappointment.
Brooke Lininger
Despite the title, this book is not about home organization, but rather a metaphorical way of looking at the rooms in your "emotional house." The premise of this book is clever and there is some good advice offered, with an occasional epiphany to be had depending on your own personal situations. I found the informal "girlfriend style" writing with interspersed psychology definitions thrown in to be a bit simplistic at times, but overall it's a good read for those who wish to look into their own ...more
Janastasia Whydra
Lucy Danziger and Catherine Birndorf's "The Nine Rooms of Happiness: Loving Yourself, Finding Your Purpose, and Getting Over Life's Little Imperfections" is a self-help guideline that is designated for women. The book does offer some good advice and also some thinly-veiled enlightened sexism in the guise of medical/professional counseling advice. No longer is the woman's place solely in the kitchen, but we are to be confined to the house (even if it's just a metaphor). Couldn't they come up with ...more
Dec 26, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: read-in-2013
With self-help books you've got to always remember that it's not going to be a perfect prescription for your individual problems, more like a general guide for where to start digging for the cure. This book is no different, although I really enjoyed that every point was illustrated with examples from real women. It was actually done in the format of "here's my problem" - "here's the solution" so it made the reading experience feel like a group of women sitting around a table sharing stories. I d ...more
Dec 23, 2013 rated it it was ok
A friend of mine was reading this book, and the concept of it sounded very interesting. So I picked it up from the library. I read about 3 or 4 chapters before I realized that they were all almost identical. The premise of the book is that your life can be compartmentalized into nine rooms, and subsequently compared to your real brick and mortar house. While the concept is interesting, once I got into this book, it wasn't any different than any other self-help book. I didn't even end up finishin ...more
Jan 18, 2012 rated it it was ok
I am a long-time subscriber of "SELF" magazine and was looking forward to reading the editor Lucy Danziger's book. I loved the premise of the book where the different aspects of your life (family, work, kids, personal time, etc.) are tied to a room in a house. For example, the bathroom is tied to your health and body image because that is where most people go to contemplate those things.

After the initial explanation of the book's premise, it falls short on offering useful advice. I'm a self-help
Mar 15, 2010 rated it did not like it
Recommends it for: I wouldn't recommend this book
I didn't finish it, because I have better things to read with my time. It was really not so bad, but I did not find it very insightful. It might have been more useful if I'd never read a self-help book. I didn't like the way it was written or the perspective that Lucy Danziger brought very much. The personal-story and analysis was somewhat useful/interesting, but I don't think I go very much out of that nor am I sure how useful the average reader would take away from it. I also have a sneaking s ...more
Apr 15, 2011 rated it really liked it
Shelves: nonfiction, 2011
I found a lot of helpful stuff in this book. The pearls of wisdom at times gave me an ah-ha moment while other times it just made for a good read.

My biggest complaint about this book is it focuses so much on married women and women with children. I realize a lot of women who will pick up this are married with children but it just reinforced to me at times that our culture is very centered around families with children while some of us either struggling to have children or who choose to not have
Apr 11, 2014 rated it it was ok
This is more of an endorsement for Edith Wharton's Fullness of Life, which is great, but I didn't want a book endorsement.

This book is okay. I like the idea of compartmentalizing my life (which I already do) and using a house to illustrate it, however, I think in order to be a full, actualized person, you shouldn't compartmentalize your life. I should be able to think about my infected toenail in any damn room I please because it affects every aspect of my life, not just one part.

I think the pu
Megan Machin
It was alright, a little slow at times to get through and nothing mind blowing or new to me. Maybe it's just because I prefer "The Secret" for an inspirational, life changing type of book. Once you've read and watched "The Secret" I think it's hard to think of any other self help book as excellent. Plus, they do tend to focus a lot on kids which I don't have yet and the concept of the house was odd to me.
Nirupama P.R.V.
Oct 13, 2016 rated it really liked it
Whether you lead a sorted existence or you want help in any one facet, this book holds many techniques to improve life and savor all our roles and responsibilities. The analogy of rooms of a house and the distinct categories of life is interesting and helpful. With real-life anecdotes, it is a fascinating read that will leave everyone with at least a few hacks to better their lives.

Detailed review on my blog:
May 24, 2012 rated it liked it
The book itself wasn't terribly amazing, but it did encourage some soul searching on my part. The way the book was set up, there were lots of "case studies" or examples from real women. Some of the scenarios I could relate to and really made me think, but most were things I couldn't really relate to (even though I'm pretty sure I'm the target audience: married with kids). It was a good book in that I now have some food for thought.
Tânia ARC
Mar 09, 2012 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Não consegui ler o livro até ao fim.
É um livro de auto-ajuda, talvez daqui a uns anos ache adequado ao meu estilo de vida e necessite de alguns conselhos para "acordar" melhor todos os dias, mas neste momento não faz o género de leitura que aprecie ou necessite.
Primeira experiência frustrada de livros de auto-ajuda!
Nov 15, 2011 rated it it was ok
While I think the concept behind this book is a good one, it was a bit of a regression for me, and I wasn't able to complete reading it. I think it would be perfect for someone who is new to the work of self-development. However, if you have read authors like Dr. Wayne Dyer or Eckhart Tolle, this is probably not the concept for you.
Katie K
Apr 28, 2010 rated it it was ok
Shelves: grown-up, non-fic
I usually try to avoid self help books but I gave this book a try. I didn't end up finishing it. I don't think I was necessarily the target audience for this book which didn't help (I'm not married, I don't have children) but even if I did fit the audience, I'm not sure this book would have been all that helpful to me.
Mar 17, 2010 rated it it was ok
I felt like this book was just okay for me. I think it's geared more towards working moms with crazy busy lives, not for a single gal like myself. There were very few parts I could relate to, but I did like the overall theme of finding true happiness within yourself and not expecting other people to make you happy - something that is hard for everyone to remember!
Feb 26, 2010 rated it it was ok
Shelves: non-fiction
The concept of the book is pretty basic and a super easy read. It’s filled will anecdotes to support the idea, but it’s a bit long and trite at times. I think it trivializes some of the problems in the interest of trying to cover too many topics. Overall though, interesting concept and creative approach.
Barb Larkin
Jun 09, 2012 rated it it was ok
Yes I thought a lot of it was trite, but did like the metaphor of the rooms as they relate to who we are as individuals.
Sometimes helps to give our stuff its own metaphorical space so we can focus on the important bits we are neglecting.
There are probably other helpful metaphors to use, whatever makes sense.
Oct 19, 2013 rated it really liked it
Shelves: relationship
I loved the concept of comparing women's emotions to a HOUSE. It had well thought-out ideas, and used excellent examples to back its theory. However, this book is geared for solving problems with family/friends relationships. It's perfect for women, who are trying to find balance with husband, work, kids, extended family members, social life, and so on.
Gina Lincicum
Dec 30, 2013 rated it really liked it
Loved the analogy using a house's rooms (office, kid's room, bathroom, etc.) for the various parts of a mom's life. Loved the voice and advice from a psychiatrists paired with the real-life issues from a working mom (the editor of SELF). Really found this book thought-provoking and helpful.
Feb 14, 2014 rated it did not like it
Shelves: health
First of all, I grabbed this because I was in hurry and needed a book to read. Meh! It's all common sense and kind of silly. I mean, do I really need someone to tell me thinking positive will make things better? um noo..
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