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Can't Stop the Grrrls: Confronting Sexist Labels in Music from Ariana Grande to Yoko Ono
"This is a convincing call to action." Publishers Weekly
Words and labels can hurt us all. And for many female musicians, the wounds are everywhere. From stars like Britney Spears and Mariah Carey to classic icons like Yoko Ono, female musicians have long been the target of double standards and toxic labels in the media and pop culture: liar, crazy, snake, diva, slut, b*tch. These words hurt—the popular expression “sticks and stones” is wildly wrong. Lily Hirsch confronts the full range of this sexist labeling as well as the repercussions, concentrating on the experiences of Yoko Ono, Courtney Love, Britney Spears, FKA twigs, Taylor Swift, Kesha, Mariah Carey, and Ariana Grande, among many others. While men can make outrageous backstage demands, women like Carey are punished as “divas.” A sign of supposed genius for men, “crazy” is a word of condemnation for many women—with legal ramifications in Spears’ case. Hirsch dives into the world of these women, looking at their personal lives, relationships and breakups, music, media coverage, public reception, as well as the origins of these toxic labels and how they have caused serious damage. Can't Stop the Grrrls reveals the inner workings of misogyny and invites us to think about these remarkable women on their own terms—showing us how women have fought back too, sometimes reclaiming these words and their own stories through music.
Words and labels can hurt us all. And for many female musicians, the wounds are everywhere. From stars like Britney Spears and Mariah Carey to classic icons like Yoko Ono, female musicians have long been the target of double standards and toxic labels in the media and pop culture: liar, crazy, snake, diva, slut, b*tch. These words hurt—the popular expression “sticks and stones” is wildly wrong. Lily Hirsch confronts the full range of this sexist labeling as well as the repercussions, concentrating on the experiences of Yoko Ono, Courtney Love, Britney Spears, FKA twigs, Taylor Swift, Kesha, Mariah Carey, and Ariana Grande, among many others. While men can make outrageous backstage demands, women like Carey are punished as “divas.” A sign of supposed genius for men, “crazy” is a word of condemnation for many women—with legal ramifications in Spears’ case. Hirsch dives into the world of these women, looking at their personal lives, relationships and breakups, music, media coverage, public reception, as well as the origins of these toxic labels and how they have caused serious damage. Can't Stop the Grrrls reveals the inner workings of misogyny and invites us to think about these remarkable women on their own terms—showing us how women have fought back too, sometimes reclaiming these words and their own stories through music.
234 pages, Hardcover
First published March 15, 2023
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
May 16, 2023
Excellent! This was a really fascinating read.
April 12, 2023
This book is overall okay. Not good. Not great. Not excellent. Just okay.
The writing is decent, but overall too personal and informal. Hirsch's constant censorship of curse words also feels immature and, frankly, ludicrous, given the context and content matter. It's difficult to take seriously.
I appreciated the intent: to bring to light the latent and blatant misogyny and sexism (which are two different things, though Hirsch uses them almost interchangeably) in the music industry and American culture. I'm sure Hirsch got her point across to the average reader. I, however, found it difficult to stomach her willful ignorance of the reasons some of these women are disliked which have nothing to do with their sex.
Taylor Swift, for instance, is certainly a victim of misogyny and has been from a very young age, but that does not excuse her status as a symbol of white supremacy, which she refuses to condemn, or her position at the top of the list of biggest fossil fuel users in the world, with one of the biggest individual carbon footprints in the world.
And Courtney Love has been ridiculed in ways Kurt Cobain wasn't for things that they both did, certainly; but the things that Hirsch claims Love experienced simply because she was a woman are not the result of her sex, but, from my understanding of celebrity culture, all part of the job. The Monkees, the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, and countless others went through the same physical attacks, public humiliation, non-consensual undressing, hair pulling, and highly sexual interview questions, from fans and reporters alike.
I agree with Hirsch that these things are abhorrent and shouldn't happen to anyone, but I don't agree with her use of this evidence. Sexism and misogyny are very real, and women in such high profile positions as the ones discussed in this book are at an incredibly high risk. But not every atrocity that happens to a woman is the result of sexism and misogyny, and not all sexism is misogyny.
The way Hirsch talks about men is disturbing to say the least, and could be its own form of sexism. She places the blame for the treatment of women across history on all men of all times, and even belittles her own husband in the same breath as she thanks him. Hirsch oversimplifies the experiences of both men and women, and, in doing so, she supports the very harmful binary she seems to want to dismantle: of women as powerless victims and men as evil oppressors. It does not sit well with me.
Similarly, in trying to dismantle the "Yoko Ono Myth," Hirsch does the opposite. In almost every chapter, she criticizes the press for likening women to Yoko Ono. If Yoko Ono is undeserving of the hate she has received over the last fifty years (I agree with her on this; the treatment of Yoko Ono is appalling), then I don't fully understand Hirsch's insistence that being compared to her is something which women artists should be offended by. She seems to want to lift Ono up and destigmatize her position in music history, but at the same time, she tells her reader that merely the mention of her name is offensive and unacceptable. Her discussions of Ono, and the subsequent musicians who have been compared to her, could have been written differently.
Conceptually and very broadly speaking, this book is good. Hirsch's arguments, however, are not.
The writing is decent, but overall too personal and informal. Hirsch's constant censorship of curse words also feels immature and, frankly, ludicrous, given the context and content matter. It's difficult to take seriously.
I appreciated the intent: to bring to light the latent and blatant misogyny and sexism (which are two different things, though Hirsch uses them almost interchangeably) in the music industry and American culture. I'm sure Hirsch got her point across to the average reader. I, however, found it difficult to stomach her willful ignorance of the reasons some of these women are disliked which have nothing to do with their sex.
Taylor Swift, for instance, is certainly a victim of misogyny and has been from a very young age, but that does not excuse her status as a symbol of white supremacy, which she refuses to condemn, or her position at the top of the list of biggest fossil fuel users in the world, with one of the biggest individual carbon footprints in the world.
And Courtney Love has been ridiculed in ways Kurt Cobain wasn't for things that they both did, certainly; but the things that Hirsch claims Love experienced simply because she was a woman are not the result of her sex, but, from my understanding of celebrity culture, all part of the job. The Monkees, the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, and countless others went through the same physical attacks, public humiliation, non-consensual undressing, hair pulling, and highly sexual interview questions, from fans and reporters alike.
I agree with Hirsch that these things are abhorrent and shouldn't happen to anyone, but I don't agree with her use of this evidence. Sexism and misogyny are very real, and women in such high profile positions as the ones discussed in this book are at an incredibly high risk. But not every atrocity that happens to a woman is the result of sexism and misogyny, and not all sexism is misogyny.
The way Hirsch talks about men is disturbing to say the least, and could be its own form of sexism. She places the blame for the treatment of women across history on all men of all times, and even belittles her own husband in the same breath as she thanks him. Hirsch oversimplifies the experiences of both men and women, and, in doing so, she supports the very harmful binary she seems to want to dismantle: of women as powerless victims and men as evil oppressors. It does not sit well with me.
Similarly, in trying to dismantle the "Yoko Ono Myth," Hirsch does the opposite. In almost every chapter, she criticizes the press for likening women to Yoko Ono. If Yoko Ono is undeserving of the hate she has received over the last fifty years (I agree with her on this; the treatment of Yoko Ono is appalling), then I don't fully understand Hirsch's insistence that being compared to her is something which women artists should be offended by. She seems to want to lift Ono up and destigmatize her position in music history, but at the same time, she tells her reader that merely the mention of her name is offensive and unacceptable. Her discussions of Ono, and the subsequent musicians who have been compared to her, could have been written differently.
Conceptually and very broadly speaking, this book is good. Hirsch's arguments, however, are not.
May 8, 2023
Une revue intéressante, mais qui tourne peut-être un peu trop autour de l'anecdotique puisque chaque chapitre est basée sur une chanteuse différente (parfois plus d'un chapitre): Yoko Ono, Britney Spears, FKA Twigs, Kesha Sebert, Mariah Carey, Taylor Swift, Ariane Grande et se concentre souvent sur une attitude, une affaire ou un mot spécifique pour chacune des figures (bien que c'est souvent élargi à plus de chanteuses et des réflexions sur le harcèlement et cyberharcèlement autant des critiques et médias que des spectateurs): folle, "gold-digger", "bitch", salope, briseuse de groupe, menteuse, diva, etc.
Comme on peut le voir avec ce court résumé, ce livre s'attarde uniquement aux chanteuses américaines et britanniques, bien qu'on analyse un peu les chansons de quelques artistes (Ono, Swift, Grande), on peine à parler de composition ou d'autres choses que ces mêmes figures. C'est intéressant, mais je ne connaissais pas le tiers des figures mentionnées (ce n'est pas le genre de musique que j'écoute), mais au moins, il y a un bon résumé de qui ces personnes sont et quelles sont les affaires qui les ont traversées.
Comme on peut le voir avec ce court résumé, ce livre s'attarde uniquement aux chanteuses américaines et britanniques, bien qu'on analyse un peu les chansons de quelques artistes (Ono, Swift, Grande), on peine à parler de composition ou d'autres choses que ces mêmes figures. C'est intéressant, mais je ne connaissais pas le tiers des figures mentionnées (ce n'est pas le genre de musique que j'écoute), mais au moins, il y a un bon résumé de qui ces personnes sont et quelles sont les affaires qui les ont traversées.
March 5, 2023
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an arc of this book in exchange for an honest review.
This book is a very interesting look at the toxic labelling of female musicians, and the misogyny behind it. The author takes a deep dive into specific female artists, and the specific labels they’ve been stuck with, and how these labels are problematic. I really enjoyed this one, I felt like I learned a lot, while still easily being able to engage with the book, and not feel overwhelmed by information. I did find certain parts to be slightly repetitive, but overall I enjoyed this one.
This book is a very interesting look at the toxic labelling of female musicians, and the misogyny behind it. The author takes a deep dive into specific female artists, and the specific labels they’ve been stuck with, and how these labels are problematic. I really enjoyed this one, I felt like I learned a lot, while still easily being able to engage with the book, and not feel overwhelmed by information. I did find certain parts to be slightly repetitive, but overall I enjoyed this one.
September 28, 2023
An important book about the double standards that women face in the music industry; the fact that we blame women for men's failures (it's Yoko's fault the Beatles broke up; Courtney is responsible for Kurt's death; Kesha gets sued by Dr. Luke). Leaned a little too heavily on comparing every situation to the Yoko Ono situation at some points.
March 23, 2024
Very interesting book. Reads like an academic report, which I believe may have been its start. Some of the chapters go on for too long, but this is a really good and in-depth look into the challenges of female performers.
May 5, 2023
This was pretty comprehensive, though there were a few times random social media users were quoted that I could have done without.
August 27, 2023
Details sexism, racism, and misogyny in music journalism beginning with Yoko in the ‘60s through to women in the music industry today. Well researched. Liked it.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews