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You're Not the Boss of Me: Brat-proofing Your Four- to Twelve-Year-Old Child

3.48  ·  Rating details ·  163 Ratings  ·  22 Reviews
For every parent who has ever wanted to scream, “Save me! My child is acting like a brat!” there’s You’re Not the Boss of Me. Filling a critical void in parenting manuals, revered childhood development and behavior expert Betsy Brown Braun, bestselling author of Just Tell Me What to Say, dispenses invaluable advice on how to brat-proof kids during the formative ages 4 thro ...more
Paperback, 272 pages
Published April 20th 2010 by William Morrow Paperbacks (first published 2010)
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Jun 12, 2010 rated it liked it
Shelves: 2010-books
The essence of the book is that children will behave as a brat when they don't feel significant. Therefor, the child needs to feel as if (s)he plays a meaningful role and a purpose within the family. Modeling is the most powerful form of communication, so be mindful of how you are behaving as this will impact your child. The sooner you start dealing with character traits, the easier it will be to help the child become the adult you dream of them becoming. She starts with a practical chapter on h ...more
Lenore Webb
Aug 10, 2010 rated it liked it
Shelves: parenting
It seems that it was trying for my Mom to be away from home. But I think it can be that way any time we are not in our own home. But I feel that some parenting skills could have been used where she was at. I am recommending that the book You're Not the Boss of Me: Brat Proofing Your 4- to 12- Year Old Child become a new parenting bible for some.

I know that we all wish to friends with our children. Alas we are parents first. And if we continue to do all to make the kiddos always happy then we wil
Mar 21, 2011 rated it it was amazing
I am happy that I got this book, for one, it has ideas and things I can incorporate NOW with my 4 year old, but also things that I will have to look back on and use when he is 7, 9, 12 etc. There are 10 Chapters:
How to talk to your kids
Growing an Empathetic child
Building Independence in your child
Teaching Responsibility
Creating a Respectful Child
Instilling Honesty in your child
Building a Self Reliant Child
Making a Gratitude Adjustment in your child
Eliminating Spoilage in your child
Bringing Humor
May 02, 2011 rated it really liked it
I really like this particular parenting book because each chapter is set up with an explanation of its subject and then bullet point tips include sample ways to say things. For example, "Why don't you start over and tell me the whole, true story?" in the "Instilling Honesty in Your Children" chapter. This book isn't as research based as some of the others I've read, but it is extremely practical and applicable. Having so many examples of how I might explain something to a child or encourage a ce ...more
Michele Weidenbenner
This book was ok. What I didn't like is the author had a lot of "don't do this" but not too many "do THIS". She gave some examples of not directing, rescuing, explaining, etc, to your child but did not follow up on what to actually do instead. The author suggested that when our children steal, not to tell them that they will go to jail because, "this simply is not true". Well, I in fact believe that shoplifting IS illegal so I DID tell my 4 year old that she will go to jail if she steals and so ...more
Lee Anne
Jul 15, 2010 rated it liked it
Some of the phrases Braun suggests parents use I would be embarrassed to hear myself say, they're so corny. That being said, she does impart some good, practical advice for dealing with acquisitiveness, whining, and many of the other perils of parenting. Like most parenting books, it makes me a better parent while I'm reading it; let's see how much sticks with me.
Dec 02, 2010 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2012, parenting
Good advice here. More for the littles and nipping problem behaviors in the bud (or never allowing them to begin). What about the older ones you've already messed up? Need to find that book.
Jenny Canfield
Sep 19, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Informative, insightful, helpful and influential in changing my parenting style for the better!
Morninglight Mama
Yes, the information and suggestions in this parenting book have been written and read before, but I have to say that the organization and "angle" of this guide works incredibly well at conveying to parents not only solid advice, but also driving home the points of WHY the advice makes sense. While the title points the action toward the child, the bulk of the advice is geared toward parental behavior. Personally, this is one that I found myself nodding, dog-earing and highlighting along for so m ...more
Feb 10, 2011 rated it really liked it
A lot repetitive in some areas, but also some "why didn't I think of that" moments to ponder. A different take on guiding older children. Kids don't respond to sarcasm to modify their behavior but can certainly model it when it will drive me crazy. Good reminders on encouraging appreciation, respect, humor, and humility in kids.
Jul 03, 2012 rated it liked it
I first heard the author interviewed on one of my favorite podcasts, For Crying Out Loud. I liked her sensibility and advice. This book doesn't have much that is new or innovative, but it had good reminders, especially about communication and respect.
Sep 26, 2010 rated it really liked it
Another excellent book by Braun. She is becoming my go-to for parenting advice. She covers so many topics we are dealing with or will be in such a thoughtful and practical way.
Sep 28, 2011 rated it liked it
its ok...Im still reading
Oct 10, 2012 rated it liked it
Good but a little redundant. A good deal of soft information - but great food for thought.
Dec 17, 2014 rated it it was ok
Nothing earth shattering in this book. Geared more for parents with younger kids. My kids aren't brats, they're just hormonal :)
Oct 01, 2010 rated it liked it
many useful ideas--mostly common sense. a bit repetitive. too many lists
Sep 21, 2013 rated it liked it
Written well. The child development was interesting but the tips seem to be things I already practice with my kids.
Jan 09, 2014 rated it it was ok
Too much "don't do this" and not enough "do this".
Liz Regenold
Mar 26, 2011 rated it liked it
Wish I could get away with giving to a few chosen people. Excellent.
Jun 30, 2010 rated it it was ok
This was okay. Nothing groundbreaking here. Some good ideas but I was really looking for a magic pill. Does anyone have a magic behavior pill? Especially for the Summer?
Jul 09, 2010 rated it liked it
Shelves: fiction, library-copy
Well organized with some good pointers.
May 06, 2012 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2012, how-to, nonfiction
Nothing incredibly new, but I like her approach and the many lists with concrete examples (say X, not Y, when such-and-such happens).
Penny Rogers
rated it really liked it
Jan 03, 2016
linda k. engle
rated it liked it
Aug 19, 2018
rated it really liked it
May 03, 2011
Tanya Hoff
rated it it was amazing
Jul 24, 2014
rated it liked it
Feb 04, 2015
rated it really liked it
Feb 28, 2012
rated it it was amazing
Apr 12, 2012
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Oct 26, 2017
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