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The Perfect Murder

Victor Smiley and his wife Joan have been married for nearly twenty years. Victor secretly loathes Joan more and more each day. Joan is bored by Victor, and his snoring drives her mad. Their marriage has reached a crisis point....

Victor decides there is only one way to get Joan out of his life forever, but he's about to get a nasty surprise. As it turns out, Victor's not the only one with murder in mind.....

144 pages, Paperback

First published March 4, 2010

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About the author

Peter James

201 books3,900 followers
Peter James is a global bestselling author, best known for writing crime and thriller novels, and the creator of the much-loved Detective Superintendent Roy Grace. With a total of 21 Sunday Times No. 1s under his belt, he has achieved global book sales of over 23 million copies to date and has been translated into 38 languages.

Synonymous with plot-twisting page-turners, Peter has garnered an army of loyal fans throughout his storytelling career – which also included stints writing for TV and producing films. He has won over 40 awards for his work, including the WHSmith Best Crime Author of All Time Award, Crime Writers’ Association Diamond Dagger and a BAFTA nomination for The Merchant of Venice starring Al Pacino and Jeremy Irons for which he was an Executive Producer. Many of Peter’s novels have been adapted for film, TV and stage.

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5 stars
828 (25%)
4 stars
1,094 (33%)
3 stars
933 (28%)
2 stars
331 (10%)
1 star
119 (3%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 299 reviews
Profile Image for Shariful Sadaf.
218 reviews108 followers
May 13, 2021
Nothing special! The story was very depressing and nasty writing from the beginning. Expecting some kind of a twist at the end but here was nothing extraordinary. Disappointed.
Profile Image for Ken.
2,655 reviews1,385 followers
October 16, 2015
Part of the Quick Reads initiative to encourage adults to read, this short story is also a perfect way to dip into best selling authors to as a taster for their work.

It’s s fun little read as Victor Smiley and his wife Joan have been married for 20 years and slowly getting tired of each other’s company.
Victor soon hatched a plan to dispose of his wife...

I’m a big fan of Jame’s Roy Grace series and with this also being set in Brighton is a great way to get a flavour of that series.

This story had also been expanded to a stage play to include Grace, which I’ve also seen.
Profile Image for JR.
253 reviews79 followers
March 18, 2017
"A short, sharp shot of crime."

This was a fun little read. I'm not sure how believable the ending was, but it was a satisfying way to neatly tie off the plot. This is my first ever Peter James reading experience. It was a fun plot to work through, and I was curious how the ending might play out.

As for the writing - it sort of felt like two separate men wrote this book. The first third of the book is written poorly, in terms of genre appropriateness. The writing in the beginning sort of feels like something straight out of a children's fairy tale. It has a "once upon a time" feel, which felt uncomfortable. But as the story goes on, the writing improves, and James seems to find his groove in the narration.

I found a bit of the dialogue cheesy. "Victor, darling!" Come on, does anyone say 'darling' in a serious manner, ever?

Anyways, this was fun. A nice little book to read in those moments of down time on the subway or bus or waiting in line.
Profile Image for Bettie.
9,973 reviews
July 26, 2015


Description: Victor Smiley and his wife Joan have been married for nearly twenty years. Victor secretly loathes Joan more and more each day. Joan is bored by Victor, and his snoring drives her mad. Their marriage has reached a crisis point.

Victor decides there is only one way to get Joan out of his life forever, but he's about to get a nasty surprise. As it turns out, Victor's not the only one with murder in mind...


Opening: The idea to murder his wife did not come to Victor Smiley in a sudden flash. He was a man who always planned carefully.

A short contemporary farce that evoked a Golden Age theme.

EastEnders: Jessie Wallace and Shane Richie to star as different married couple in The Perfect Murder theatre tour

This will be shown at Theatre Royal, Brighton next March.
Profile Image for Francesca.
102 reviews97 followers
October 16, 2016
'The Perfect Murder' is the story of a couple (Victor and Joan Smiley) who have been married for a long time, have grown to hate each other, and have each decided that they want to murder the other. This is the basic plot-line that surrounds this novella and drives it forward. Why divorce was never considered by either is unclear and isn't mentioned in the story. That does seem like the logical next step for a couple that no longer love or even like each other but this idea doesn't seem to occur to either of them and they both go straight to the idea of murder. This is lucky for the reader, otherwise this probably would've been a very dull read. It is played out in a darkly humorous way and with all the absurdity that a story like this can come with. The Smileys are incredibly unlikable and felt reminiscent of The Twits. They seem to have the same levels of intelligence (or lack thereof), they have the same nasty personalities, and the Twits are another couple that hated and plotted against each other. There are twists and turns which keep the story interesting and unpredictable until the very end. One of the recurring plot elements made me think of The Tell Tale Heart, although I didn't feel it was executed to quite the same level of excellence. Overall, the story was fun and quick to read. It didn't leave a very strong or lasting impression on me but I still felt like it was a couple of hours well spent.
Profile Image for Sumaîya Afrôze Puspîta.
257 reviews339 followers
April 27, 2025
একটা পারফেক্ট মার্ডারের মূল সূত্র এটাই যে, একটা মার্ডার কখনো পারফেক্ট হতে পারে না। আপনি বন্দী হবেন‌ই–হয় সে ভবের কারাগারে, নয় মনের কারাগারে।

মানসিক চাপ কমাতে হালকা থ্রিল হিসেবে খুবই ভালো। গতি তুলনামূলক স্লো হলেও পড়ে মজা পাওয়াটাই আসল। শেষের দিকের অনুবাদ ভীষণ সাবলীল। সবমিলিয়ে ৩.৫।
Profile Image for Erica⭐.
511 reviews
July 9, 2020
Victor Smiley and his wife Joan have been married for nearly twenty years. Victor secretly loathes Joan more and more each day. Joan is bored by Victor, and his snoring drives her mad. Their marriage has reached a crisis point .

Victor decides there is only one way to get Joan out of his life for ever, but he's about to get a nasty surprise. As it turns out, Victor's not the only one with murder in mind .
Profile Image for Dana ****Reads Alot****.
135 reviews76 followers
November 10, 2015
This book was hilarious. The relationship between Victor and Joan just had me cracking up. The rapport between them fighting was comical. But neither one of them knew they were planning each other's murder. Something happens and I cannot give it away. Sometimes things just have away of backfiring. A must read. Its very short and worth the hour of reading.
Profile Image for Nat K.
541 reviews239 followers
July 16, 2026
”One whole year to plan the perfect murder.”

Revenge is a dish best served cold. Or so the saying goes. Though after reading this my suggestion would be to put such grandiose ideas out of your head. Cut your losses and run. Fast. And don’t look back.

This novella centres around a middle-aged couple, Victor and Joan. They met at a dance class, and it was lust at first sight. ”Joan thought he was handsome and dashing, Victor had thought she was sex on legs.” They couldn’t keep their eyes - or hands - off each other. They couldn’t imagine they would ever feel any differently.

But the years passed and their feelings changed along with their bodies. Barely keeping up the pretence of tolerating each other. Neither one hiding their disdain or their infidelity. She with a burly taxi driver she met while supposedly doing charity work, he with a pretty twenty-something he met at Brighton’s “Kitten Parlour” where he went to find solace in other female company.

“He was sitting in front of the telly, beer can in his hand with the cat looking at him sourly from across the room.”

“They lived alone with their ginger cat, Gregory. That cat did not like either of them.”

See? Even the cat was sick of the sight of them.

Victor and Joan are convinced they would be happy again with their new partners if they could only just ditch their existing tired, boring, ageing ones. But how? Victor and Joan (unbeknownst to the other) start hatching a cunning plan (as Baldrick was wont to say). Convinced it was the only way and one hundred per cent foolproof. What could possibly go wrong?

This story had me simultaneously cringing while also rolling my eyes as Victor and Joan are both quite appalling as well as delusional about their appeal and what they hope to achieve. The writing is taut and clever and quite biting in showing their bitterness. The final scene is just wickedly perfect.

The moral of the story truly is to be careful what you wish for. It may just come true.

Disclaimer! I finished reading this several months ago, so this review may or may not have turned out quite differently if I’d written it then.
Profile Image for Wissal H.
1,090 reviews483 followers
December 4, 2021
Un vieux couple chacun d’eux décident de réaliser un crime parfait pour débarrasser de l’autre !
Chacun d’eux vivent une histoire d’amour avec un autre partenaire ! Et chacun d’eux détestent l’autre intensément !

un crime n’est pas bien réalisé !

Et soudainement la femme et son partenaire vont tuer le mari ( qui a déjà pensé mille fois comment va tuer sa femme secrètement) ! Ils vont se débarrasser du corps mais comment ?? Où ??

Une série des évènements terrifiantes et surprenantes !

Un bon déroulement des faits et un ensemble des sentiments confuses et mystérieuses et bien sur plein de suspense !

La fin était choquante et heureuse pour moi au moins 😂


Trop beau roman et trop beau moment passé avec cette lecture 👍
Profile Image for Marwan.
47 reviews41 followers
March 8, 2017
That was an entertaining quick-read book. It's about a married Couple, Victor and Joan whose marriage has been falling apart over the years. Victor decides to kill his wife Joan to get out of this life. Therefore, he start planning carefully for the "perfect murder" . He doesn't realize, however, that Joan wants him dead too. So the question is who's gonna strike first?, and if he/she can get away with it?
Profile Image for Amina (ⴰⵎⵉⵏⴰ).
1,661 reviews305 followers
August 10, 2020
Je ne dirais pas nostalgie mais plutôt ironie quand tu nous tiens.
Lecture légère et assez distrayante.
Profile Image for Anja Henriksen.
365 reviews65 followers
December 28, 2022
3.5* a lot funnier than I'd expected; nice quick read about how not to handle marital problems
Profile Image for Richard.
2,439 reviews204 followers
August 23, 2012
This is a clever book from an earlier "Quick Read" series.
Existing fans of Peter James will delight in this work that demonstrates his skills and a new reader will be equally pleased by the author's work.
As a consequence you will want to read more from this established crime novelist which is what you wants from "Quick Reads".
The story is about a tired relationship where each is looking for a way out; but murder isn't all it is cracked up to be. Before nature takes its course, fate steps in to provide a comical twist, perhaps
clearly signposted but like many a tale of the unexpected the end is a pleasant conclusion.
A good read for a wet spring afternoon but use the experience to read more of Peter James's work you will not be disappointed.
Profile Image for Mubtasim  Fuad.
469 reviews84 followers
August 18, 2026
বইয়ের নামটা যতটা থ্রিল ধরে রাখে, আই উইশ তার ৫% মূল গল্পটা ধরে রাখতে পারতো!
খুব প্রত্যাশা নিয়েই শুরু করেছিলাম। কিন্তু শেষ কয়েক পৃষ্টা পড়ে যাওয়া আামার জন্য ছিল বেশ ফাস্ট্রেটিং। এত স্লো আর সিলি ওয়েতে থ্রিলারের বিল্ডআপ হয় না সাধারণত আর কনক্লুশন আরো ট্রেস লাগছে। 🥴
Profile Image for Undomiel Books.
1,276 reviews27 followers
November 12, 2019
I really enjoyed the quick little read; I flew through it in about an hour!

The narrative style was far simpler than James' usual style, but it worked really well for this quick murder story. I enjoyed the twists and turns as the murder unfolded, and did not expect the ending, but what a great way to end it!

This was a great read, but just lacked the super 5* WOW factor. All in all, really enjoyed it, and recommend it as a quick, cosy November read!
Profile Image for Mitul Rahman Ontor.
161 reviews61 followers
April 20, 2020
ছোট প্লট, ছোট বই। গতিময় নভেলা। এক বসায় শেষ করার মত।
কাহিনি আহামরি কিছু নয়। তবে দেড় ঘন্টা সময় কাটানোর জন্য খারাপ না।

গল্পের গতিটাই বেশি ভালো লেগেছে। অপ্রয়োজনে লেখক গল্প টেনে বড় করেন নি।

অনুবাদকের ক্রেডিট : অনুবাদেও গতিটা বজায় রেখেছেন।
তবে অনুবাদ বিশেষ ভালো লাগে নি। প্রথমদিকে একেবারেই আক্ষরিক অনুবাদ। শেষের দিকে অনুবাদের জড়তা খানিকটা কেটেছে।
Profile Image for অনিরুদ্ধ.
143 reviews21 followers
May 10, 2020
৩.৫/৫

ঊনিশ বছরের দাম্পত্যজীবন পালন করছে ভিক্টর এবং জোয়ান। কেউ কাউকে সহ্য করতে পারে না। বরঞ্চ তারা দুজনেই পরিকল্পনা করতে থাকে কিভাবে অন্যকে খুন করা যায়! পারফেক্ট মার্ডারের প্ল্যান।

মোটামুটি ভালো গতির নোভেলা। এরকম বইয়ে শেষে একটা বড়সড় টুইস্ট না পেলে ভালো লাগে না। সেই কারণে তারা কমিয়ে দিয়েছি। তবে সময় কাটানোর জন্যে ভালো!
Profile Image for Labijose.
1,189 reviews814 followers
June 13, 2016
Like so many couples around the glove, Victor and Joan have grown apart from each other…..to the point of each one wishing to murder his wife//her husband and be able to enjoy his//her lover!!!! Whoa!
Well, the plot, as it seems, is not quite innovative. Nevertheless, “The perfect murder” develops as an interesting enough quick read. (It won’t take you more than 2 hours to go through it all). The question here is: Who will be the first one to succeed and get away with crime?
Nothing to do with Roy Grace series here. This is a something entirely different. Even so, it’s Peter James at his best.
I had a couple of hours of entertainment, sometimes even hilarious moments. My only regret is not to be able to see the play at theaters, not at least where I live.

Profile Image for Peter.
780 reviews117 followers
November 25, 2019
This book, little more than a novella, is set in Brighton and centres around Victor and Joan Smiley, a married couple in their forties. Victor and Joan have been married nearly twenty years but their marriage has reached breaking point.

Victor is bored with Joan and is a regular visitor at a sex parlour where he has fallen in love with one of the 'staff' and decides that the only way to be free of Joan is to murder her. Little does he know Joan has is also being unfaithful and is having an affair with a married man, Don, and she too is considering murder.

Due to the brevity characterisation is sketchily but generally effectively done, similarly there is little in the way of a back story but what there is are a number twists and turns, some I them I expected some of them of I didn't.

This book is part of the Quick Reads series, which puts a real onus on the writer's use of vocabulary and ability. Some of these books seem to work whilst others don't. This I fear falls into the latter group. That's not to say that it is a not totally without its merits. I read this in one sitting so if you are looking for an introductory book for the author or want something not too demanding for your commute to and fro work, then this would be fine but if you are looking for something a little more demanding then I would suggest that look elsewhere.
Profile Image for NaYeeM.
229 reviews71 followers
April 8, 2020
কি আজাইরা একটা বই!! শেষ করে রাগ হচ্ছে খুব।
শেষে কিছু হবে বলে শেষ করলাম.....
কিন্তু শেষে মুখ দিয়ে বের হল "এটাই!! শেষ!!"...
আর detectiveগুলো এমন stupid কেন!! কিছু একটা বললাম আর detective বিশ্বাস করে নিল এমন হয় নাকি!!

বইটা তো নাকি ২০১০এ প্রকাশিত, so ঐ সময়ে investigation এমন বাজে হবে ভাবতেই হাসি পাচ্ছে(তাও আমেরিকার মত একটা দেশে😂)

লেখক যদি detectiveদের strong রেখে শেষের খেলাটা দেখাতে পারত তাহলে বেস্ট হত ❤

মনে হয়েছে publisherরা চাপ দিচ্ছে, আর লেখক যা-তা করে বই একটা বের করে ফেললেন 😂😂
Profile Image for Nathalie Bakelandt.
511 reviews29 followers
February 12, 2024
Een kortverhaal. Joan en Victor zijn al meer dan 20j getrouwd. De laatste jaren bouwen zich steeds meer ergernissen op, die altijd in ruzies eindigen. Victor wil zijn vrouw vermoorden. Wat Victor niet weet is dat Joan ook rondloopt met dezelfde plannen. Victor gaat regelmatig naar Kamila. Joan vindt haar troost bij Don. Samen met Don zoeken ze naar de perfecte moord. Victor bereidt zich ook voor op de perfecte moord. Door zijn korte hoofdstukken vlieg je door dit kortverhaal. Verrassend einde.
Profile Image for Book_Worm_Jim.83.
201 reviews4 followers
November 28, 2022
Victor Smiley and his wife Joan have been married for nearly twenty years. Victor secretly loathes Joan more and more each day. Joan is bored by Victor, and his snoring drives her mad. Their marriage has reached a crisis point....

So, I've read titles by James before, so I knew that I'd enjoy this even before I opened the cover. I didn't like the husband, Victor from the start. Having said that the wife, Joan all that much either. I did like the plot and thought the ending was poetic justice. I read this one is one sitting and not bit, by bit, by bit...
Profile Image for Rifat.
509 reviews332 followers
June 1, 2020
ভালোবেসে বিয়ে করেছিল ভিক্টর আর জোয়ান। বিয়ের পর উনিশ বছর কেটে গেছে।দুজনে জড়িয়ে গেছে অন্য সম্পর্কে। ভালোবাসা আর নেই শুধু ঝগড়াটাই রয়ে গেছে। দুজন দুজনকে খুন করার পরিকল্পনা করে। ভিক্টর চিন্তা করে যে পুরনো রুমটা পরিস্কার করে সায়ানাইড রেখে দেবে আর রাতে নাক ডাকবে জোরে যাতে জোয়ান রাগে ঐ সায়ানাইড ওয়ালা রুমে চলে যায়। আর ওদিকে জোয়ান তার বয়ফ্রেন্ড ডনকে নিয়ে পরিকল্পনা করে ভিক্টরকে চিনির ওভারডোজ দিয়ে মারবে,কারণ ওর ডায়েবিটিস ছিল।ভিক্টরের প্ল্যান অনুযায়ী বাড়ি তৈরি। জোয়ানও মোটামুটি তৈরি।অথচ এরা কেউই জানে না যে অপরজনও তাকে মারতে চায়।
রাতে ভিক্টর ফিরলে অনেক ভাল ব্যবহার করে জোয়ান। ডন আসে একটু পর। রাগের কারণে জোয়ান হাতুড়ি দিয়ে বাড়ি মারে ভিক্টরকে আর সে মারা যায়।যাই হোক তারা প্ল্যান করে কিভাবে কি করবে।পুলিশের কাছে গিয়ে জোয়ান মিথ্যা অভিনয় করে। তারা লাশটাকে গ্যারেজে পুঁতে রাখে। এদিকে জোয়ানের মনে ভিক্টরের ভয় ঢুকে যায়,অনুতপ্তও হয় সে। শেষে ধরা পড়ে তারা।তবে জোয়ান অভিনয় করে আর ফেসে যায় ডন। জোয়ান চারদিন জেলে থেকে ৫ম দিন বাড়ি ফেরে। রাতে ঘুমানোর সময় তার মনে হয় পাশেই ভিক্টর নাক ডাকছে।তাই চলে যায় সায়ানাইড ওয়ালা রুমে। ধীরে ধীরে চলে যায় ঘুমের অতলে।
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Lance Greenfield.
Author 133 books258 followers
February 18, 2012
A married couple, Victor and Joan, have grown apart over the years. They have become bored with each other and have sought, and found, extra-marital stimuli. Each plans to murder the other so that they can begin new lives with their respective lovers. The planning is meticulous. It has to be to fall in line with the book's title, The Perfect Murder.

The big question, right from the very beginning, is who will succeed in murdering the other first? Or will the murders be so perfect that they occur simultaneously.

To find out the answer to that question, and many others that this story raises, you'll just have to invest an hour of your time to read it.
Profile Image for Mark.
1,785 reviews249 followers
November 10, 2011
I received a copy of this little book (100 pages) because I had entered in some prizedrawing. It was my first acquaintance with this writer.

A few chapters into the book I was already quite sure how the tale would end (and yes I was right), so there were little surprises. However the journey to get there was well enough written and kept my attention. The characters were all a bit unpleasant which was kinda of nice and you hoped they would get what was coming to them.

It has made me curious about the writers other books so one of these days I shall most certainly visit one of them.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 299 reviews