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The Baby Owner's Manual: Operating Instructions, Trouble-Shooting Tips & Advice on First-Year Maintenance

3.89  ·  Rating details ·  1,548 Ratings  ·  172 Reviews
At Last! A Beginner’s Guide to Newborn Baby Technology
You’ve programmed your VCR, you’ve reinstalled Microsoft Windows, you can even check your e-mail on your Palm Pilot. But none of this experience will prepare you for the world’s biggest technological marvel: a newborn baby.
Through step-by-step instructions and helpful schematic diagrams, The Baby Owner’s Manual ex
Paperback, 226 pages
Published February 1st 2003 by Quirk Books (first published 2003)
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Jan 13, 2011 rated it it was amazing
This seems like a silly joke book at first, but it's actually useful. I think most people who said it was 'awful' or 'unhelpful' either don't have a sense of humor or completely missed the point. I'm not sure what people are looking for in baby books, but this one has pretty much all the basics: how to hold, how to bathe, how to swaddle, feed, etc. If new parents are looking for something deeper like 'how to make baby a highly moral being' or 'how to teach my baby to read in five languages befor ...more
Mr. Gottshalk
Feb 15, 2016 rated it really liked it
Well, taking all the advice in the book at its word, I thought it was very helpful. Can't say yet because my "model" (baby) won't be in stock until May. I am keeping this book in my library (garage) as a reference in case I need to help my baby when he comes along. There were lots of things I learned, like how to change a diaper on a boy and what to look for as far as signs from the baby as he matures and so forth. A lot of the information I already knew but I still found it comforting that I di ...more
Lilac Wolf
Dec 03, 2012 rated it it was amazing
From Lilac Wolf and Stuff

This is so funny! It really does have useful information, but I'm a mom twice over, so nothing in it was news to me. If I were to gift this to someone, it would be the dad-to-be.

As funny as it is, the graphics catch your eye and the information is laid out in a logical manner. It literally is an instruction book about babies. I think it would take out some of the mystery that usually scares guy silly.

One of the first things covered is "The Baby: Diagram and Parts List" a
Apr 08, 2009 rated it really liked it
Shelves: nonfiction
Fun, concise, and irreverent how-to book for new parents. Ex. "Frequent play time will benefit all models. It serves a trifold purpose: it makes the baby happy, can activate sleep mode, and teaches the baby about his relationship with the world." Perfect for the dad whose yack reflex is activated by the typical baby book.
Petra Eggs
Jul 10, 2008 rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: people buying baby-shower or new baby gifts
The set treats the baby as a computer unit fresh out of the box, complete with a big Quick Start guide. The book is full of good information and all the items are both funny and useful. Its the sort of gift that you will buy time and time again. (I've bought two, so far).
Mar 09, 2009 rated it liked it
Recommends it for: Fathers to be
Recommended to Eric by: Kevin Shult
Shelves: parenting
Short and funny, and written with the male mind in mind. Although not overly detailed, it was still comforting, as it breaks down the steps for taking care of a child into easy-to-follow instructions. It is definitely not a "baby bible", but a good starting point.
Nov 24, 2007 rated it did not like it
Shelves: 2006
This is a terrible, terrible take on human development. It is only fit to be a joke and I therefore wouldn't recommend it to any new parent.
Angela Randall
This book was always going to be a slightly humourous way of explaining baby stuff, so even when the points made are really obvious, you can giggle a little at the wording and imagery.

The first half is straightforward dot point advice that most people would know or would have found out from any baby book. The last two chapters covered growth and development then emergency safety information. In those chapters they managed to dot-point their way through a lot more information than I've seen in a
Oct 27, 2010 rated it really liked it
This book was recommended to me by a friend with two little ones. I really enjoyed it. It provided good information regarding babycare in an entertaining fashion.

The book included information on basic tasks like changing a baby, swaddling, etc.

Parents who resent babies being referred to as if they were electronic devices probably wouldn't enjoy this book.

Those with a sense of humor about parenting may both enjoy this book and find it highly useful.
Sep 25, 2007 rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: anyone about to have a baby
Shelves: favorites
This is the only one of my many baby/pregnancy books that my husband read. He carried this thing with him everywhere. Great instructions on all the basic baby care stuff that you should know but don't and feel too dumb to ask a more experienced person. Great stuff to warn you on what to expect when the baby comes home all written in an electronics instructional manual style for humor.
Apr 25, 2009 rated it liked it
Great "new-dad" book. Reads like a car instruction manual and adds humor. FAST and EASY.

Author: Louis and Joe Borgenicht
Publisher: Quirk Books
Copyright: 2003
Genre: Parenting/Childcare
Pages: 217
Date Read- 4/25/09
Oct 20, 2008 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: non-fiction, humor
Very funny. Reads & looks like a car manual --perfect for dads to be ;)
Vasil Kolev
Jan 16, 2017 rated it really liked it
Well written, fun, and still extremely horrifying.
Apr 05, 2016 rated it really liked it
Concise and readable baby care primer with a great sense of design and a good (if slightly overdone) sense of humor. Surprisingly helpful as a starting resource.
May 25, 2015 rated it it was amazing
I found it informative and I especially liked the appendix. The charts seem really useful.
Jun 10, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Duhovito, sažeto i informativno. Dakle, jako korisno! I, jesam li već rekla, duhovito! :)
Sep 17, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Долго не могла приступить к чтению книги. Как-то из стиля оформления и первых страниц с трудом верилось, что узнаю что-то нужное и полезно. Начался декрет: руки дошли и до этого с виду забавного произведения. Так как ребенка я жду первого, книга меня приятно удивила: в упрощенном и схематичном формате освещаются основные моменты ухода за ребенком с вариантами и вариациями.

Для себя я даже где-то поставила заплатки, чтобы было не так страшно практиковаться на малыше. И да, звучит и выглядит забавн
May 22, 2017 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I loved the writing style of this book. It manages to keep the same pace and tone throughout. My lower rating is because the information in the book is very dated, and there is a bunch of information or recommendations that we would not longer consider accurate/true, which is very important for first time parents.
Decent basic information for first time parents

Enjoyed the style of the book, but it did not cover information in very much depth. Fairly high level and basic information conveyed.
Israel Fermín Montilla
Feb 07, 2017 rated it it was amazing
This book is full of useful and practical advices, it must not substitute a visit to your pediatrician but it helps you identify and solve most of the issues with your new family member. The title seems like a joke, but it's a great book to avoid freaking out for normal stuff
Jul 12, 2017 rated it really liked it
This was a great and informative book, if a little out of date now. One to hang on to and review for tips and tricks as munchkin is growing.
Sep 12, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Loved this book! Our baby is due in January so I guess I'll have to wait until then to find out exactly how helpful it is, but I enjoyed the author's sense of humor.
A cute "guide" to having a newborn for people who will actually never have one.
Seely McCarty
Jun 16, 2017 rated it liked it
Similar info to other books but presents it in an interesting manner
Mar 20, 2017 rated it really liked it
The bullet-points are a bit too descriptive, but the illustrations are very informative and easy to understand.
Mar 17, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Definitely useful reference material for anyone with a newborn. Written in a pleasant and humorous style.
Amar Aleryani
Mar 17, 2017 rated it it was ok
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Feb 14, 2015 rated it liked it
I found the approach of this book (an "instruction manual" for babies) to be very funny at first, but it was hard to maintain the conceit throughout. Some information in here was helpful, but some of it is unfortunately very outdated after 12 years, meaning the book provides incorrect and sometimes potentially harmful information (based on the all the other information I've read). Some examples: There is no evidence that pacifiers cause "nipple confusion," and rather than being avoided for the f ...more
Aug 09, 2011 rated it really liked it
The Baby Owner’s Manual by Louis Borgenicht, MD, and Joe Borgenicht, D.A.D., can be used as a reference guide by all new parents and probably some who already have children. The main approach of the book is similar to how a manual would talk about your new stereo or other consumer product by first describing its parts and functions and then discussing care and maintenance. There are tips on how to perfectly swaddle the baby and how to deal with emergency situations. Included also is a section on ...more
Abe Something
Feb 02, 2012 rated it really liked it
Written like an owner's manual for a new piece of equipment (if that turns you, move along), the book explains much of what you want/need to know about making sure your baby functions well. The book is presents in a fun, easy to digest format the pertinent information a soon-to-be parent is looking to learn about. How often, how-to wash your infant, and what safety measures when doing so; how to "program" your baby's sleep cycle; baby-proofing, what common ailments look like; how to pick up a ba ...more
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