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Escaping the Endless Adolescence: How We Can Help Our Teenagers Grow Up Before They Grow Old
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Escaping the Endless Adolescence: How We Can Help Our Teenagers Grow Up Before They Grow Old

3.96  ·  Rating details ·  104 Ratings  ·  27 Reviews
Do you sometimes wonder how your teen is ever going to survive on his or her own as an adult? Does your high school junior seem oblivious to the challenges that lie ahead? Does your academically successful nineteen-year-old still expect you to “just take care of” even the most basic life tasks?

Welcome to the stunted world of the Endless Adolescence. Recent studies show tha
Hardcover, 272 pages
Published October 20th 2009 by Ballantine Books (first published 2009)
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Clare Cannon
Jun 21, 2012 rated it it was amazing

An excellent, enlightening study which offers solutions to common teenage issues by focusing on how to draw out the 'emerging adult' in adolescents.

Some of the helpful ideas it explains:
- The new phenomenon of the 'quarter-life crisis' : life is boring, teens are waiting for something to jump out and reveal their life's purpose
- Teens often indulge in extreme behaviour because they have nothing else worthwhile to do, which leads to a downward spiral. Some of the cases described demonstrate q
Ben Vogel
Oct 08, 2013 rated it really liked it
5 stars if what you read in here is new to you or you needed to be strongly reminded of how people used to raise children by challenging them with increasing responsibilities, trust, and inclusion to the adult world. 4 stars if you already knew this stuff but needed to be reassured that some modern researchers believe that it is more important than ever that society get back to this "old-fashioned" way of parenting. I enjoyed this book for the latter reason. I hope more people read this and enac ...more
Feb 26, 2014 rated it really liked it
Shelves: non-fiction
If you are tired of hearing about how teenagers are naturally rude, defiant, moody, and difficult and all you can do is just wait till they grow up, read this. The authors take a positive (but not completely unrealistic) approach. The book got a little slow & repetitive at times, as self-help books often do, but that might be in part because I was already on board with a lot of the suggestions before I read the book. I also would have appreciated more specific examples and suggestions becaus ...more
Jul 22, 2010 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: nonfiction
I wish I had read this book 10 years ago...
Gwen Nicodemus
Jun 11, 2013 rated it it was amazing
The gist of this book is that adolescence has increased in time from a few years to decades. Kids no it, and they don't like it.

Along with John Gatto, the authors posit (with research backing them up) that meaningful work can turn around even the most difficult teen.

Even "good kids" can fall into the depression that accompanies the endless adolescence, so changing parenting startegy can help.

Some important tips for parenting adolescents include the following.

--If a kid can do a task, have the k
Jan 12, 2012 rated it really liked it
The thing I liked most about this book is that it doesn't cast teenagers in the role of helpless victim. Instead, it views their energy, motivation by rewards, and underestimating of risks as unique tools that help them move into the adult world if they are given the right growth opportunities.

A lot of the advice mirrors the advice I got from a mom who has raised several successful teenagers of her own. "Let them practice making real decisions in small situations so they aren't overwhelmed when
This book resonated with me in many ways and made me think differently about interactions I have with my son and my students, and how those might be even more effective. While the book was a bit repetitive in places, I thought the anecdotes were powerful, and I raised several discussions about the content with different people in my life. I am a bit wary about the My Teaching Partner program mentioned in one section, as there are not a lot of details offered and the tone there rings a bit false ...more
Joseph Glass
Oct 20, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: psychology
I've read a number of psychology books that struggle to find connections between their lab findings and real life, or instead make sweeping sensational claims that are nowhere near supported by actual science. This book has neither of those problems. It's the perfect blend of well-founded science, practicality, and application.
The writing is very accessible, the case studies useful and memorable, and the chapters address the modern pitfalls of how our society treats adolescence, as well as how
Apr 05, 2013 rated it really liked it
Interesting and thought provoking. Teens are not driven by hormones but flounder due to lack of adult interaction, reference, and the chance to grow up. It's time to give your teens the responsibility to learn and live by mistakes they make, with guidance but not total control. Although American in its viewpoint, there is a lot of careful insight and case studies that also ring true in Europe. A must read for all parents with kids in their teens and a book that all educators should know by heart ...more
Jun 12, 2013 rated it it was ok
The main premise of this book is that adolescence is essentially "Lord of the Flies." Thus, to become adults adolescents need to be socialized by adults and not by other adolescents. The author mainly recommends treating adolescents like adults and exposing them to adult responsibilities, e.g., chores, volunteer work, jobs. While I agree with this message, I don't think that the book really broke any new ground.
Apr 17, 2010 rated it liked it
Escaping the Endless Adolescence offered some interested takes on being a modern teen. While I enjoyed the general theme "Teens are capable of a lot more than society thinks and should be pushed into adulthood with (loving) help and support," the actual supporting arguements were repetitive and relatively limited on detail.
Auntie Soni
Dec 04, 2010 rated it really liked it
Interesting thoughts. I am starting by having my teenagers take over their laundry, and letting them feel capable in other areas as well. As my sister Annette told me, "we all need to feel important and that we contribute." She is so smart.
Susan Williams
Jul 19, 2013 rated it really liked it
I found this to be one of the best guides to parenting teenagers I've read in awhile. It's not preachy but provides insight and a course of action to help parents guide their teens from immaturity to maturity.

I must read for parents of teens!
Mar 30, 2010 rated it liked it
This nonfiction book discusses how we are creating an endless adolescence for our teenagers by refusing to give them adult responsibilities. It definitely explained a phenomenon going on in our culture today with many parents. Good read, at times a bit monotonous, but I really got the message.
Dec 11, 2013 rated it really liked it
Do we see irresponsible behavior among teenagers and adults because their brains are not yet fully developed? The problem, the authors say, is not nature, but nurture -- or lack of appropriate expectations.
Aug 29, 2010 rated it it was ok
I was assigned to read this book for my job. The problem with this book is that it is for parents to read, there is not much I can do with this book in my classroom outside of what I already do.
Jun 20, 2014 rated it really liked it
Very interesting non-fiction. It gave me a lot to think about. Great read for anyone with teenagers or soon to be teenagers.
May 30, 2010 rated it really liked it
I love, love, love this book on the power and potential of teenagers when we expect it of them. Can't wait to finish it.
Feb 24, 2012 rated it liked it
Super interesting trends of elongating adolescence with interesting research.
Jan 17, 2013 rated it liked it
Completely on board with the sentiments and concepts. However, I feel the book lacked in its discussion of practical methods for change.
Sheri Lee
Jan 18, 2011 rated it really liked it
Very helpful information for parents of teens who want them to grow up!
Apr 11, 2014 rated it it was amazing
A subject I am fascinated by: how to help teenagers grow into responsible, independent adults! Loved it.
Jul 03, 2013 rated it really liked it
I thought that this book had some really valuable points for parents of teenagers to think about. I don't generally enjoy this type of book, but found it to be well written and informative.
May 22, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Has affected my parenting, and reinforced my belief in homeschooling. Persuasive, well-documented, and common sense parenting with plenty of interesting history lessons to boot. Highly recommend.
May 06, 2013 rated it liked it
The segment (chapter nine) on making high school more meaningful was worth the price of the book. Sure, I borrowed the book from the library...but still.
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