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The Cannibals of Candyland

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3.90  ·  Rating details ·  877 ratings  ·  125 reviews
There exists a race of cannibals who are made out of candy. They live in an underground world filled with lollipop forests and gumdrop goblins. During the day, while you are away at work, they come above ground and prowl our streets for food. Their prey: your children. They lure young boys and girls to them with their sweet scent and bright colorful candy coating, then rip ...more
Paperback, 151 pages
Published August 28th 2009 by Avant Punk (Eraserhead Press) (first published 2009)
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Average rating 3.90  · 
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Anthony Chavez
May 26, 2012 rated it really liked it
Shelves: bizarro
I believe this is the 7th novella by the bizarro master Carlton Mellick III (CM3) I have reviewed. This was a good solid read, longer then his usual 80-120 page read, this one keeps you engaged clocking in at 151 pages.

After reading much of Mellick's work, I am constantly amazed by his ability to churn out uniquely strange stories without repeating himself. Personally, I would like to "Being John Malkovich" his mind and see things through Mellick colored glasses, I'm sure I would be frightened,
...more
David Barbee
Jun 28, 2010 rated it it was amazing
Almost all you need to know about Cannibals of Candyland is in its title. Carlton Mellick III took a weird and interesting title and absolutely ran with it here. It seems like a simple concept at first, but Mellick pushes it into brave new territory. It’s fun because it lets us see what a Candyland world and its people would be like. Then there’s the “Cannibal” part of the concept, and Mellick doesn’t hold back on that, either.

Franklin Pierce (named after one of our worst presidents), is another
...more
Addy
Dec 08, 2013 rated it it was amazing
This book was a very tasty treat if i say so myself. I wasn't sure what to expect, as i am new to bizarro fiction, but I was very pleasantly surprised. I wanted so badly to finish this in one night as it had me glued to every page as if it were made of candy itself. I've never been so enthralled or overtaken by a book. The sad part was that it was much too short. I would love to read a full length novel about these candy people. Their world was very intriguing, and especially their laws and how ...more
Douglas Hackle
Dec 04, 2012 rated it really liked it
Candy-coated, blood-drenched fun!

Sure, that was a lame thing to type, but I couldn't resist.

As a satircal piece, The Cannibals of Candyland targets dominant/submissive gender dynamics observed in the old-fashioned model of married couples raising children. Jujy, the freaky candy woman wonderfully pictured on the book's front cover, functions both as a monstrous antagonist and as a sort of maternal-paternal figure in this nicely paced, f*cked-up little bizarro story. As a maternal figure, Jujy's
...more
Stefanie Von Guest
Feb 27, 2012 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Horror lovers, Bizarro fans
Recommended to Stefanie Von by: Amazon
I came across this book at random on Amazon. It took ages for it to be delivered here in the UK but it was well worth the wait. I had not read any Bizarro fiction before this and didn't even know it existed. It was this book that started it all for me. I fell in love with the amusing opening paragraph about how " Red" is such an amazing colour and the personalities of the characters made it impossible for me to put the book down. I finished it in about 3-4 days. Instantly this book became one of ...more
Hanaa
Jul 03, 2011 rated it really liked it
Started and finished the book last night.I enjoyed it, but I thought the ending was rushed (?) Maybe it was just me.
3.75
Sheldon
May 30, 2012 rated it liked it
Shelves: fantasy, horror, bizarro
Being a clown made of candy is about to take on a whole new meaning.

Franklin is a man with an obsession. He watched his siblings die at the hand of a woman made of candy when he was very young. Since then, he has been obsessed with finding these candy people and proving to the world that they exist. He should have been careful what he wished for.

The Cannibals of Candyland by Carlton Mellick III is a dark fantasy that's bittersweet. After reading a couple of other books by Mellick, I had a pretty
...more
Tired CNA
Mar 15, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Loved this book! Even though the story was completely bizarre it was fun and interesting from beginning to end.
Franklin and Jujy's sexual encounters blew my mind! Really nutty. Or should I say sweet and tasty since she is made of candy.
Looking forward to reading more of Carlton Mellicks work.
Donald Gorman
Dec 20, 2010 rated it really liked it
this is the first book I read from this mellick dude, who was recommended to me by a friend. i was surprised at how well-written it was. simple prose with the sledge-hammer delicacy that reminded me of the late richard brautigan...sort of 'in-your-face-but-not-really'. seriously, his style is casual and laid back, but it gets harsh when it needs to be. he can get vivid when describing a cannibal eating a person alive, but he knows when to put down the dagger and pick up the quill. gruesome or in ...more
gingerbread
Feb 11, 2013 rated it it was amazing
“Wouldn’t you love to see your mate enjoying your flavor? Wouldn’t that make you feel like you taste really good?” “I don’t care if I taste good,” he says. “But everybody wants to taste good.” “Humans don’t.” “Then how do humans show their affection for each other?” “They tell them, I guess.” “That doesn’t sound very intimate.” Jujy looks at the ground and frowns, as if she feels sorry for Franklin because he’s a human.
Christy Stewart
I was expecting and hoping a for a story within the Candyland mythos but Mellick created an original culture based on the idea of candy people.

Really cute and violent. A Bizarro beach read.
Mike Maski
Aug 28, 2011 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: bizarro
Wow. This was a good choice as an introduction to Mellick's books. This book is not based on the Candyland game, it's even better. I wish they would create a game based on this book!
Rubi
I am starting to become a great fan of Carlton. I adore his imagination :D

Great book.. although strange end. (view spoiler)
...more
Samantha
Apr 23, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: 2020-popsugar-rc
Franklin Pierce is determined to prove that the Candy People of Candyland exist and are eating children. When Franklin finds a child he knows being killed by a Candy Man he may just have the opportunity to finally prove their existence.

So I actually loved this book. It was so weird and crazy and yes I'm going to say it, Bizarre!! I really enjoyed being inside this world where the tables are turned and instead of children eating candy, the candy is eating the children. Franklin isn't a very lika
...more
Jeanne
Jun 14, 2019 rated it liked it
Interesting concepts. Enjoyable but not my favorite of his.
Rebecca Brock
May 24, 2012 rated it really liked it
To be honest, I wasn't sure about this book. I'd stumbled across it while looking for other things, and while the cover was eye-catching and the title is unavoidably cool, I wasn't sure if it would be my "thing." I'd never read bizarro fiction before and didn't think it was my cup o'tea.

But anyway, I gave in and downloaded this one for my Kindle and it sat there for a few months while I went through my "read only true crime/read only biographies/read only nonfiction" phases. Last night, bored wi
...more
VanillaSky
Mar 08, 2016 rated it really liked it
Shelves: made-me-sick, ha-2016
I'm not into bizarro fiction actually, but this one was a fun and sweet and bloody treat.

Like:
There are lollipop trees, licorice grass, cotton candy clouds in a grape-flavored purple sky, hills made of chocolate, rivers of jelly, fields of candy canes, and in the far distance there are enormous blue, green, and pink gumballs the size of mountains.

Franklin picks up his pace. He climbs over hills of chocolate, careful not to slip in the peanut butter mud, and enters a meadow by a pond filled w
...more
Deviant-Muse
Dec 26, 2011 rated it it was amazing
I placed this book in my to-read shelf at goodreads.com. I loved the cover art and the whole premise of the story itself. I was actually waiting for it to become available for my Nook Color. After having waited nearly a year, I gave in and finally just bought the paperback. I am so happy I did!

I thoroughly enjoyed the silliness and horrifying aspects of this book. Mellick took an idea from a board game we all know and twisted it into a sickening adult read. I must add that there are no character
...more
Rodney
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Melissa Bennett
Jul 15, 2010 rated it really liked it
This is my first journey into the Bizarro world and it won't be my last. The awesome artwork on the cover of this book is what drew me to it.
This story is about Franklin. A quite "odd" man who life was changed when he saw his siblings eaten by the candy people. Little did we know that during the day the candy people come out to lure children with their sweet smell and then they eat them. Franklin has spent his life looking for these candy people so he can once and for all prove that they exist
...more
Nobody
Sep 22, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: favorites
STOP LOOKING AT ME WITH YOUR JELLYBEAN EYES.
Daphne
Jan 14, 2016 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: own-ebook, quest
It's about what you'd expect given the publisher and the title. Gave me a pleasant hour worth of the absurd.
Rebecca
Jun 10, 2012 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I loved this book! Carlton Mellick is amazing & i'm always so happy when i read his books:) ...more
Kelly Furniss
Apr 15, 2020 rated it really liked it
I wish Goodreads sometimes allowed you half stars because here is where I want one.
Four and half stars please here for me.
Franklin as young boy witnessed the death of his siblings by the Candy woman, a woman with candy floss pink hair who lured them to her with her sweet scent and bright colourful candy coating.
But the candy woman has evil eyes, razor sharp teeth and claws that rip apart flesh, the flesh of young children they seek as pray.
Franklin is quite an eccentric intellectual outcast and
...more
J. Peter W.
May 03, 2018 rated it it was amazing
one of my favorite books by CM3.
Amanda
Jan 25, 2010 rated it really liked it
Shelves: horror, bizarro
The descriptions of the candy people are very interesting. I enjoyed reading the different ways the author used candy – both as the chief component of the Candy people’s bodies and as the main feature in their world. The descriptions often got very gory and made me pause for a few minutes (such a wuss!). That didn’t stop me for long because I devoured this in just a few hours. I found it refreshing, since I’ve never read anything this messed up. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve read some strange things, ...more
CalebCW
Feb 22, 2020 rated it liked it
Well. My second bizarro book of ever and I can't explain why I have grown a rather unhealthy fascination with this genre (help me!). This was like an adult goosebumps mixed with the 34th rule of the internet. Its violent, it's sexual, it's weird. Holy crap it's an 80's euro horror movie. This book follows around a young man who ends up being called Green Apple. He's used and abused by his "wives" and he's had a traumatic past which involved him watching his siblings being eaten by the cannibals ...more
William M.
Sep 20, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: horror, bizarro
4 AND 1/2 STARS

Author Carlton Mellick has once again delivered with The Cannibals Of Candyland. This is a completely original, sexually twisted, no-holds-barred tale as only Bizarro genre leader Mellick can write. He has more ideas in a single chapter than many novels have in its entirety. Each character is so unique in Mellick’s fresh landscape you can’t help but be swept away into his seductively dangerous world. It was like stepping into a macabre Willy Wonka nightmare.

Each book I read by M
...more
jasmine
Dec 19, 2014 rated it it was amazing
tbh this was the weirdest book I've ever read in my entire life, and I absolutely loved every second of it. I loved the gore, especially in contrast with the sugary sweet setting. I loved Franklin as a character, I love Jujy as a character, and more importantly, I genuinely enjoyed the romantic aspect of this book, which I did not expect at all. No, seriously. Not even a little. There was a surprising amount of "edge of your seat" factor in this story, and I actually felt a lot of genuine sadnes ...more
Jordan
Jan 05, 2010 rated it liked it
I gave this 3 stars simply compared to Mellick's other books. Also, I wanted to really know more about the world that he created. I think he did a better job in Sausagey Santa in really bringing a colorful bizarro world to life. However, this shouldn't deter you from reading it. It's pretty entertaining and twisted. Worth reading.

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Best but weirdest book you've ever read? 2 28 May 24, 2012 09:51AM  

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1,303 followers
Carlton Mellick III (July 2, 1977, Phoenix, Arizona) is an American author currently residing in Portland, Oregon. He calls his style of writing "avant-punk," and is currently one of the leading authors in the recent 'Bizarro' movement in underground literature[citation needed] with Steve Aylett, Chris Genoa and D. Harlan Wilson.

Mellick's work has been described as a combination of trashy schlock
...more

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