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Tweak: Growing Up On Methamphetamines

Nic Sheff

3.94 · Rating details · 35,198 ratings · 3,025 reviews

The story that inspired the major motion picture Beautiful Boy featuring Steve Carell and Timothée Chalamet.

This New York Times bestselling memoir of a young man’s addiction to methamphetamine tells a raw, harrowing, and ultimately hopeful tale of the road from relapse to recovery.

Nic Sheff was drunk for the first time at age eleven. In the years that followed, he would r ...more

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Hardcover, 336 pages

Published February 19th 2008 by Atheneum Books for Young Readers

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Apr 21, 2009 Anastacia rated it did not like it

I wish to God that Goodreads had a category or designation for THE WORST BOOK I HAVE EVER READ, because this would definitely be in it. The schtick is a pretty good one - the drug addicted son writing his version and his father writing his own version, but the execution is just awful. The kid, Nic, is just one more selfish, entitled kid (who brand-name and name drops excessively) who goes down a wrong path and has a family to keep picking up the pieces for him, giving him chance after chance. It ...more

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Apr 24, 2008 Marianne rated it did not like it

I tried reading this book after reading Beautiful Boy and I couldn't get through it. This guy's writing was published in Newsweek? Once you get beyond the extremely graphic quality of it, I thought it was terrible. He touts himself as an accomplished writer for his age, yet he uses "amazing" to describe things at least 3 times in the first 50 pages. Come on.

However, it was interesting to read the opposite side of this story after reading Beautiful Boy. Nick is more honest than his father about t ...more

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Jun 26, 2008 Jenn rated it really liked it

Recommends it for: Readers of Beautiful Boy

Shelves: non-fiction

I heard about Tweak/Beautiful Boy through the provocative NY Times book review a few months ago. The idea of having such a harrowing story told from two opposite perspectives really piqued my interest.

Tweak is nothing if not engaging. That being said, I find the writing to be sub-par, at best. After listening to a Nic Sheff podcast, I learned that Nic writes exactly how he speaks. Filled with "like, you know"'s, I found myself frequently wondering if this was the caliber of work that landed him ...more

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Mar 17, 2009 Cheyenne rated it really liked it

Recommends it for: everyone.

Recommended to Cheyenne by: a friend.

I don't mean to put down other people's opinions but you all are being incredibly harsh. This is Nic's true story, of growing up on Meth, and unless you have also overcome such a drug, it's not your place to call him a horrible, pathetic person. And to say that throughout some of the book, he's putting the blame on other people is wrong and you've obviously misunderstood. He looked up to his father a great deal. I remember him writing about how him and his father used to go on walks together and ...more

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Jan 10, 2010 Buggy rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: shelf-09, addicted, bio-memoir

Opening Line: "I'd heard rumors about what happened to Lauren, I mean, I never even knew her that well but we'd sort of hung out a few times in high school"

There's been a lot of buzz around Nic Sheff's bestselling memoir TWEAK and for good reason, its un-put-downable. This candid, gritty and detailed struggle with addiction is an amazing story but what entranced me most here wasn't Nic's decent into methamphetamine hell or his subsequent struggles to remain sober and find some kind of peace with Opening Line: "I'd heard rumors about what happened to Lauren, I mean, I never even knew her that well but we'd sort of hung out a few times in high school"

There's been a lot of buzz around Nic Sheff's bestselling memoir TWEAK and for good reason, its un-put-downable. This candid, gritty and detailed struggle with addiction is an amazing story but what entranced me most here wasn't Nic's decent into methamphetamine hell or his subsequent struggles to remain sober and find some kind of peace within himself, it's the way this story is told. Nic Sheff the author has a gift and I adored his short choppy style of writing. His ability to put into words the pain and loneliness we all at times feel even during the height of his addiction when the words purposely become vague, paranoid and crazy. I can only hope that he continues to write as I would read anything he publishes.

Tweak chronicles 642 days in Nic Sheff's life. Beginning on day 1 we bare witness to Nic relapsing after 18 months sober. Nic hadn't planned on relapsing that day, his life was working "I'd made so much progress" but without a second thought Nic picks up right up where he left off and in a matter of 32 days loses everything... again. We follow Nic during those 32 days, learning about his history, his insecurities and disappointed family. We watch Nic score and scheme (and dream) and get high and get really sick. Only quitting when he runs out of money and can no longer function. Nic's family will have nothing to do with him but he gets one more chance from his sponsor, who in a tough love way helps get Nic back on his feet...again.

Spenser brings Nic into his family, taking him to meetings and working the 12 steps. As readers we finally get to see sober Nic. Following him on his obsessively long bike rides and feeling his excitement as he begins to write and reconnect with his family. On day 278 Nic gets a call from Zelda, the love of his life and despite warnings from friends and family Nic can't stay away from her. Quickly becoming as addicted to the beautiful but toxic Zelda as he was to drugs. Within a matter of months Nic is using again, this time its heroin and crack and the fall he takes here is faster and harder than before. Almost losing an arm to infection from a dirty needle his 22 year old body soon starts to give out.

It was despairing as a reader watching this unfold. I could feel Nic's desperation and loneliness, his inability to fit in and need to be loved but I also felt myself becoming angry when he relapsed because I wanted him to succeed so much that it was hard to read, I just wanted to shake him and say what are you doing?

This is a raw and honest look at the up and down life of an addict, it's heartbreaking, ultimately uplifting and truly enjoyable. The paperback edition also contains a group reading guide and a new afterward by the author. ...more

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Aug 16, 2011 Christina rated it did not like it

Shelves: memoir, addiction, mental-health

If you look up DOUCHEBAG in the dictionary, you're likely to see this guy under the main entry. I love memoirs about addiction, they are fascinating and usually serve as a nice reality check whenever my often troubled mind veers into darker territories. This one just irritated the hell out of me and made me badly wish I could punch the guy in the face. Sheff spends a lot of time boasting about how great a writer he is, which is strange because this book reads like an immature 14 year old wrote i ...more

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Dec 31, 2019 jv poore rated it it was amazing

Shelves: autobiography, non-fiction, memoirs, heyssel-classroom, donated, re-read

Rips my heart out, fills me with hope. Every. Time.

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Mar 05, 2008 Andria rated it it was ok

Shelves: read-2008

A book in need of an editor. But maybe that is the definition of an out of control life of a teenage/young twenty drug addict, a life in need of an editor.

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Jan 21, 2014 John rated it did not like it

Never has meth addiction seemed so boring. Or as Nic Sheff, with his fondness for trifold redundancies, would put it: boring, boring, boring. Sheff wants so badly to be the next dark, dangerous, and doomed druggy genius, but he's going to have clean up more than his act if he ever wants to belong in the same company as Burroughs, Bukowski, Miller, et al. His child of privilege, friend of the stars routine gets old very quickly, and one can only take so many repetitions of the same description, s ...more

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Aug 30, 2009 Ellen Hopkins rated it liked it

I just wanted to choke the guy. Shows addiction in a brutally honest way, but had to keep putting the book down.

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Dec 21, 2011 Valerity (Val) rated it really liked it

Shelves: non-fiction

The gritty and harrowing story of Nic Sheff, a young man who shares his story of growing up on methamphetamines (in LA & SanFrancisco), and his repeated relapses on his road to recovery. A crazy ride of a story, I read it in 24 hours.

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Jun 19, 2008 Melissa Field rated it did not like it

Honestly after reading Beautiful Boy this book was a let down. I felt our writer was one of the most selfish, self-inflated narrative voices I have read in a long time. By the end of the book I hated the kid--and found that he glamorized and legitimized his meth addiction. I am curious if this book was only published thanks to Nic's father's connections. A cliched story of an addict who really is too concerned with his California land of plastic existence. Barf. I am sure the movie starring so g ...more

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Jan 29, 2017 Cori rated it liked it

Shelves: real-life, psych

For all the issues our nation, (if you live in the U.S.) and the world, faces in regards to substance use, the fact remains that most of us will go through our life without addiction to illicit drugs. This book is amazing because it gives a firsthand account on the struggles and experiences someone has to overcome in their journey to sobriety. Nic has courage. Not only for not giving up his battle for sobriety, but in sharing his mess, warts and all, with the world. Nic's account is messier than ...more

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May 24, 2009 Spider the Doof Warrior rated it really liked it

Read this book again. It's still good but it reads a bit like On the Road, only the consequences are more realistic. Nic flushes his life down the toilet, claws his way back, and you cheer for him, but he relapses and ruins his life again.I want to read the next book he wrote but if he got with Zelda again I'd be SO FRUSTRATED and I'd YELL at the book and people would see me do this.

Also his father's book Beautiful Boy is good too. Illegal drugs don't just affect the person doing them but their ...more

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Apr 21, 2009 Moira Russell rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: 2009-50-new-books-challenge

The Twit-like update box is not enough to contain my ennui and annoyance at this point(p 259). OH MY GOD. You can just tell when Zelda enters his life again everything is about to totally fall apart, and lo, it does. Story of an addict's life. But, just as the writing about drugs is sort of totally emotionless, this has a real I-was-at-a-movie-and-it-went-like-this quality now -- it's told _about,_ but the people are really hard to get a handle on, or even to see, and therefore to care about. Th The Twit-like update box is not enough to contain my ennui and annoyance at this point(p 259). OH MY GOD. You can just tell when Zelda enters his life again everything is about to totally fall apart, and lo, it does. Story of an addict's life. But, just as the writing about drugs is sort of totally emotionless, this has a real I-was-at-a-movie-and-it-went-like-this quality now -- it's told _about,_ but the people are really hard to get a handle on, or even to see, and therefore to care about. The detail of the starfucker who immediately plugged the names of speakers at Hollywood meetings into imdb.com to see whether or not they were big shots was amusing, tho....but it's more like a Hollwood-novel detail. "When the shots are strong enough you get this feeling like your head is just pounding with energy. Your ears ring and you almost pass out and it is just amazing." Dude. What the hell kind of druggie description is that? I get that kind of feeling when I drink too many lattes in a row. If I'm going to get dragged along through someone's drunkalog I at least want some moments of good dirty nostalgia as the price of the trip.

ETA: Best bit of the book so far, sadly on page 288: "I don't sleep for four days and nights and the fucking bugs won't leave me alone....I go into the counselors' office and demand to be taken to a hospital. A silver-haired Austrian woman with shimmering blue eyes suggests, 'Why don't you just lie down and invite the bugs in? Experience the bugs crawling on you. Become one with the bugs.'

"I tell her what I think of that idea."

I really have to wonder how this guy writes -- some other reviews mentioned hearing him speak on NPR et al, and apparently he sounds just like his writing style. It really almost reads like a transcript of someone speaking, every 'uh' and 'like' intact.

FINAL THOUGHTS: I think this is the first book I've seen to have not only an afterword to the paperback edition, but also the first post of his blog, which I guess his publisher encouraged him to set up? because the story's so obviously not over. But he recently abandoned it, so. http://nicsheff.blogspot.com/ ...more

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Jun 08, 2013 dreambeast rated it did not like it

This book is actually, like, the worst thing I have ever read. It's just so, so, bad, you know?

The above is an example of the caliber of writing found in this book. No exaggeration. It's the sort of book where you're hating it so much that you're angry as you read, but can't stop because you have to find out if there is anything redemptive about it at all. In the case of Tweak, there is not.

How did such a poorly written book make it onto the NYT best seller list? I could not stop asking myself t ...more

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Dec 11, 2018 Watch Your Words rated it really liked it

Shelves: books-from-the-podcast

In what I can only describe as a harrowing roller coaster ride, constantly weaving between despair and hope, Nic Sheff illustrates his journey of coming to terms with his addiction and himself. Nic’s struggle, which he acknowledges may never end, is frustrating and sympathetic in a way that will make you want to weep for and wrap your arms around a young man attempting to conquer a demon that at times seems much larger than life. This isn’t for the light of heart. In vivid and often graphic deta ...more

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May 12, 2008 Jennifer Wardrip rated it really liked it

Shelves: trt-posted-reviews

Reviewed by coollibrarianchick for TeensReadToo.com

Methamphetamine use, commonly known on the street as crystal, tweak, the New Prozac, and crank, has become a growing problem in the U.S. in the last several years. From what I have read, there is no worse drug addiction than crystal meth. It not only affects the person using but the personal relationships they have, as well. It is not just my humble opinion when I tell you that these drugs have the power to kill or cause great harm. A great exam Reviewed by coollibrarianchick for TeensReadToo.com

Methamphetamine use, commonly known on the street as crystal, tweak, the New Prozac, and crank, has become a growing problem in the U.S. in the last several years. From what I have read, there is no worse drug addiction than crystal meth. It not only affects the person using but the personal relationships they have, as well. It is not just my humble opinion when I tell you that these drugs have the power to kill or cause great harm. A great example would be Nic Sheff, the author of TWEAK. At an early age, just a babe himself, Nick had his first taste of drugs and alcohol. Drug use escalated in Nic's case - he went from just smoking pot to abusing cocaine, heroin, and crystal meth. For over a decade, on and off, Nic used drugs. The book opens up with a bang - Nic relapsing after 18 months of being clean and sober.

You can call TWEAK a young adult book if you like, since Nic is a young adult, just in his twenties, but in actuality it is a book that will appeal to any age level, young and old alike. Teens will definitely gravitate to Nic's story because of the fact that it is someone about their age using drugs, and they can relate to it (maybe not completely but on some level). The general public may find it of interest, because it will give them an insight into the mind of an addict. Perhaps a reader may find comfort in this story, knowing that he is not alone.

It occurred to me as I was reading TWEAK that the book was like a cleanser for Nic; a way to cleanse his soul. Writing TWEAK couldn't have been easy for him, as Nic had to relive everything he did and put it down on paper. Some of what I read admittedly shocked me. I can't imagine what goes inside an addict's mind. The book was so honest; at times I ached for him. Other times I wanted to strangle him for what he was doing to himself and his family. I hate to say that I didn't think his clean and sober status was going to last very long. It was as if it was too good to be true. At the end of the book, we learn that Nic is now clean and dealing with his demons on an everyday basis. I expect that this is not going to be an easy road for him or for his family.

Everybody participates in addictive behavior in some way or another. Some people believe that people get involved in addictive behaviors because they are reckless, self-absorbed, and have no self-control. For the most part, I stand in the camp that believes that drug and alcohol addictions are diseases. You may choose to get treatment, but once an addict always an addict. Nic is never going to escape the addict label even if he does remain clean the rest of his life.

Nic's father, David Sheff, also has written a book about meth addiction. BEAUTIFUL BOY looks at Nic's addiction through the eyes of a parent. Mary Pipher, a psychologist and the renowned author of the book REVIVING OPHELIA, says on the jacket of David Sheff's book: "When one of us tells the truth, he makes it easier for all of us to open our hearts to our pain and that of others." Good reason to read Nic's book and his father's. Pick up your copies today. ...more

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Apr 09, 2008 Jeremy rated it really liked it

Recommends it for: All

Recommended to Jeremy by: Dennis Miller

Shelves: people-biography

This is the memoir by Nic Sheff that accompanies his father, David's, memoir. The book is an extremely honest look at addiction written by an addict, Nic Sheff.
This book is heavy emotionally. Everything from details on cooking meth to abcsessed arms the size of baseballs are included. Along the way Nic prostitutes himself, steals from strangers, and in a heart-breaking scene, takes $5 from his little brother's piggy bank.
Nic holds nothing back, and what is left on the page is something that is c ...more

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Apr 01, 2008 Beth rated it it was ok

Shelves: substances, autobiography

I'm not sure what to make of this book. It felt like at times it was trying too hard (to sound cool, to be edgy, to be desparate), and at times it was not trying hard enough (Sheff alludes to his "troubled past" that is supposed to be even more messed up than his present relapses, yet never gives any real details to back it up). Ultimately, the book ends up reading like a cliche that we've read and seen and heard too many times to make it fresh anymore. And although the book is "true," there are ...more

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Jun 15, 2008 Deb rated it it was ok

Recommends it for: parents of teens and teens who think they are too cool to listen to warnings about drugs

Here is the story of David Sheff's Beautiful Boy from the son’s perspective. He is not the writer that his father is, but hearing his voice, so clearly the voice of a damaged soul, and also possibly a narcissist, fills out the picture. In its own way, this book was hard to put down, despite its shortcomings. (Poor editing?) I gained a great deal of insight into the devastation of addiction. And I find that helpful in many ways. Despite all the damage he wrought and his desperate struggles to go ...more

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Aug 22, 2019 Carrie (brightbeautifulthings) rated it liked it

Shelves: life-writing, summer-bingo-challenge-2019

Tweak is a memoir of Nic Sheff’s early young adulthood as a crystal meth addict. He recounts his spiral through addiction and his very lowest points, to his turn toward rehab and the twelve steps and back time and again. From relapse to recovery, Sheff is forced to face the worst of himself and dig to the root of his addiction in the hopes that he can finally get clean, stay clean, and live his life. Trigger warnings (pretty much everything): death, addiction, drug use, overdose, withdrawal, nee Tweak is a memoir of Nic Sheff’s early young adulthood as a crystal meth addict. He recounts his spiral through addiction and his very lowest points, to his turn toward rehab and the twelve steps and back time and again. From relapse to recovery, Sheff is forced to face the worst of himself and dig to the root of his addiction in the hopes that he can finally get clean, stay clean, and live his life. Trigger warnings (pretty much everything): death, addiction, drug use, overdose, withdrawal, needles, severe injury/illness, body horror, violence, guns, hospitals, prostitution, mental illness, self-esteem issues, self-loathing.

This is a difficult read for its subject matter, and it’s twice as difficult if it happens to be familiar. Whether you are the addict or you’ve had one in your family, so much of the memoir rings true, from the way Sheff casually throws everything in his life away again and again to his own bitter self-loathing while simultaneously wanting everyone to like him. Some readers might find it comforting to know they’re not the only ones facing those challenges, but it’s far from a perfect book or even an exceptional memoir. That Sheff has a story to tell is undeniable, but that it’s the best way to tell it isn’t as clear.

The first half is a struggle just watching him repeatedly make bad decisions as an addict, where the main goal is always scoring drugs and never any kind of plot or character development. Recovery is better since at least Sheff has something to fight for, but the cycle takes up pretty much all of the book. I think the thing that surprised me most about it was how quickly relapse happened. There was usually never anything to set it off, no prolonged thinking about it; everything is gone, just that fast.

Sheff is a difficult character to like, in part because his addiction is, realistically, always his first priority, but also because he’s a little stuck up. His recovery friends tease him about his tendency to name-drop, and it’s true. He’s preoccupied with fame and prestige to a damaging level, which makes sense given that most of the book takes place in Hollywood. While Sheff as a writer is unflinching about his faults and his mistakes, it seems like the one thing he doesn’t acknowledge is how privileged he is, even as an addict. He’s from an upper-middle class family who cares about him and can afford to send him to rehabilitation centers more than once, which is hardly typical for a lot of addicts.

The ending is abrupt, and I think less time on the addiction cycle and more on the last recovery would have smoothed out some of the pacing issues as well as given us a better sense of Sheff’s character development. He blows through a couple revelations in the last section, but it’s hard to know what (or how much) those realizations mean to him without more explanation. It’s a book to read for its content, not because it’s necessarily well-written or structured. Beautiful Boy is on my shelf for later in the year.

I review regularly brightbeautifulthings.tumblr.com. ...more

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Apr 26, 2017 Jen from Quebec :0) rated it really liked it

Shelves: aty-challenge, disney-challenge, favorites, school, read-the-audio-book, reading-challenge-books, memoirs, non-fiction

I like to re-read this one every now and then in between 'big reads' as it has an easy flow and the author, a drug addict, has some wild escapades. ...more

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May 10, 2010 Kelly H. (Maybedog) rated it it was ok

Shelves: what-bio-or-memoir, what-nonfiction

Surprisingly poorly written, especially considering the author was allegedly published in Newsweek while in high school. It was all over the place and there were contradictions in his timeline. The book also said very little about his growing up. In fact, it doesn't start until he's in his early 20's and the worst of his drug use sounds like it was in college. Plus, there was almost nothing about meth. He uses a mixture of meth and heroin through half of the book but most of the time he uses wha Surprisingly poorly written, especially considering the author was allegedly published in Newsweek while in high school. It was all over the place and there were contradictions in his timeline. The book also said very little about his growing up. In fact, it doesn't start until he's in his early 20's and the worst of his drug use sounds like it was in college. Plus, there was almost nothing about meth. He uses a mixture of meth and heroin through half of the book but most of the time he uses whatever is available. My daughter is a recovering meth addict and she read it and suggested I read it. When I brought this fact up she said, "Oh yeah, it's really not about meth at all. It's just really scary."

I didn't think it was that scary. I think he got off really well considering what he did. During the course of the book's narrative, he never slept on the street, he never actually had nowhere to go. There were always people willing to help him. He relapsed several times after the worst thing he did which was prostitution and O.D.'ing on GSB. I felt a disconnect from his emotions in the book like he was telling us what he should be feeling rather than how he was actually feeling inside. He also only very very briefly mentioned his probable bi-polar diagnosis and it didn't sound like he was properly medicated for that. Until that is taken care of, no amount of therapy is going to prevent him from relapsing.

Basically, I didn't buy that this was the last time he had relapsed and somehow he was now going to change. The time between his last rehab stint and the time he wrote the book was shorter than other periods he'd been sober. There was no sudden epiphany and realization of self about anything really significant. He didn't hit bottom. There was no real explanation or apparent understanding of why he relapsed in the first place. He only briefly touched upon his other addictive and self-destructive behaviors. The only really positive change I saw was moving away from L.A. and San Francisco where the majority of his drugging behavior happened.

Sadly, I think this book was an attempt to capitalize on his father's success with Beautiful Boy: A Father's Journey Through His Son's Addiction telling us what he thinks we want to hear. The title feels like marketing ploy (and I grudgingly admit it worked: I would have been less likely to read it if it was purportedly about heroin addiction which has been written about to death). This book covers no new ground and really just left me irritated with this man who was raised in a life of privilege who just kept playing a big dangerous game. I wanted a book about a teenager like mine, who had a rough start in life and got sucked into the world of meth and what it was like. This isn't that book.

All that said, I did read it to the end pretty quickly. ...more

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Aug 24, 2008 Shana rated it it was amazing

I truly enjoyed this book. I just finished it and I am excited to write this review. I had just finished Beautiful Boy, which is written by this author's father regarding and is about his son's (the author of Tweak, Nic's) battle with drug addiction prior to picking up Tweak. Both books were compelling and it was amazing to read about the same story from the son's perspective after reading about the experience from his father's perspective - a rare experience. Having read his father's book first ...more

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Jun 30, 2008 furious rated it it was ok

Recommends it for: no one

Shelves: sociology, memoirs, weirdodrugshit, hardcover, from_work

i consumed the first half in a haze not unlike the author's, which is to say, without feeling or emotion or time spent considering my reasoning. when, during his feel-good clean-up, i started to actively root for a relapse, i knew i was probably never going to feel sympathy for him. and in fact, i never did. fuck this kid & his problems (tho it never became clear precisely what those were, only that they caused him to become a fucked up junkie). whatever, bitch, life is hard for everyone. there ...more

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Apr 22, 2009 Jenny rated it liked it

I definitely prefer the father's book over the son's, not to say that the son's memoir isn't powerful, it just isn't enjoyable to read. First, it clearly reveals the seedy, dangerous and horrific underbelly of drug abuse and addiction in American cities.

It's hard to say if it is by design, but you begin the book expecting to feel sympathy for Nic and his drug addiction, but as you ride the roller coaster of addiction, sobriety, and relaspe with him, you begin to feel the frustration that his par ...more

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Apr 08, 2019 Mymymble rated it really liked it

What was I thinking reading this?

Sheff's personality shoots all over the place as he seesaws between addiction and rehab, Mr Nice Guy and total pr*t. But hey it's his life. I read this before watching the film and now think I probably won't watch the film.
But it's gotta be a 4* on the strength of the crack and Arizona rehab chapters alone. The third quarter of the book is brilliant. ...more

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Apr 02, 2010 Michael rated it did not like it · review of another edition

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. Okay, I get it: drugs are bad and people who use drugs make bad decisions. Truthfully, I understood this before I read this book, so my hope was that Nic's story would have something else, something more insightful, to teach me. Unfortunately, it didn't. Instead, what I got was a run-of-the-mill "day in the life of a druggie" story told with mediocre writing. In a memoir this personal and tragic you would at least expect to feel a little sympathy for the main character; that would at least have Okay, I get it: drugs are bad and people who use drugs make bad decisions. Truthfully, I understood this before I read this book, so my hope was that Nic's story would have something else, something more insightful, to teach me. Unfortunately, it didn't. Instead, what I got was a run-of-the-mill "day in the life of a druggie" story told with mediocre writing. In a memoir this personal and tragic you would at least expect to feel a little sympathy for the main character; that would at least have been some sort of consolation for wading through all the terrible things that happened to Nic and the unceasing redundancy of the story. Unfortunately, Sheff's portrayal of his actions and thought processes just grated on me until I was rolling my eyes.

The story starts with Nic Sheff running around the streets as a twenty-something looking for drugs with his loser friends. The story ends with him trying to make amends with his family while in rehab. Then, in the epilogue, Sheff tells us that he has relapsed but is now doing fine. Then, after the prologue, in a snippet from his blog, Sheff tells the reader that he relapsed, once again, after writing the epilogue, and then assures us that he is finally on the right track. This frustrating redundancy may be Sheff's way of showing us the vicious cycle of drugs, but I don't think it is. It seems more like the mark of a middle-of-the-road writer.

At the end of the book Sheff is trying to convince his parents that what he went through, with the drugs and all, was just as hard for him as it was for them. This book seems like his way of justifying his actions; his way of proving to his family (and himself) that his life was difficult. Is that what this book is? A justification? Because it doesn't seem like it is trying to be anything more profound.

Between the beginning of Nic's story and his eventual (failed) first attempt at rehab, not much happens that you wouldn't expect to happen to anyone making the decisions that Sheff makes. Nic gets high. Nic gets sick from the drugs. Nic complains that his life is hard and that he wants to die. Nic meets a girl. Nic and the girl decide they need to go to rehab together. Rehab doesn't work. Repeat. Literally, this is the plot of the book. It is what happens, over and over (first with Lauren, then with Zelda, who Sheff can't but help reminding us, continually, is famous).

Yes, I get it: drugs are harmful. But, like I said, I already knew that. Tell me something I don't know. ...more

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Jun 10, 2009 Joanne Baines rated it did not like it

Shelves: print, audio, have-it, borrowed

I hate meth addicts. I had hoped that this book would bring some understanding of what it's like on the other side of the drug. It did not. It just dragged me through the experience of spending time with a selfish sociopathic tweaker again. Redundant as hell. In order to save you some time and cash, here's how it goes...

"I'm going to steal from you, entice the people you love to do this satanic drug with me and take apart anything that has value so that it'll be all fucked up in a heaping mess i ...more

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About Nic Sheff

Nic Sheff

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Nic Sheff is the author of two memoirs about his struggles with addiction: the New York Times bestselling Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines and We All Fall Down: Living with Addiction. Nic lives in Los Angeles, California where he writes for film and television.

Books by Nic Sheff

High: Everything You Want to Know About Drugs, Alcohol, and Addiction

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Trivia About Tweak: Growing Up...

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Quotes from Tweak: Growing Up...

“It's like if the music is loud enough I won't be able to listen to my own thoughts. ” — 177 likes

“And though I have done many shameful things, I am not ashamed of who I am. I am not ashamed of who I am because I know who I am. I have tried to rip myself open and expose everything inside - accepting my weaknesses and strengths - not trying to be anyone else. 'Cause that never works, does it?

So my challenge is to be authentic. An I believe I am today. I believe I am.” — 128 likes

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