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A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World

Paul E. Miller (Goodreads Author)

4.28 · Rating details · 13,804 ratings · 1,142 reviews

Author Paul Miller shares his insights and conclusions about how to connect the broken pieces of your life and allow prayer—even poorly delivered—to fill the gaps with meaning and substance. Miller’s down-to-earth approach and practical nature will help you see that your relationship with God can grow and your communication with Him can get better. Parents will find Miller ...more

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Paperback, 277 pages

Published May 29th 2009 by NavPress Publishing Group (first published 2009)

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May 13, 2011 Alexandra rated it it was amazing

Recommended to Alexandra by: Staci Thomas, Randy Greenwald

Shelves: 2011, theology

I bought "A Praying Life" over a year ago. . . I respect the author and after the recommendations from a good friend and my pastor, I knew it was a "must read." But. . . I picked it up, put it down. . . picked it up, put it down. . . I even bought it for my mother-in-law, and still hadn't read it.

Now, over a year later, I finally read it. (The first book to be read on my birthday kindle!) And. . . wow. . . just what I needed at this point in my life. Unpretentious, Gospel-focused, practical. . . ...more

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May 03, 2011 Sheila rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: religion-faith, kindle

I am very ambivalent about this book. While there are parts that I really enjoyed, there are other parts that really annoyed me.

I enjoyed learning about the author's autistic daughter Kim. He is very open with the struggles she has faced, and the prayers he has had for her over the years.

The author also says that Jesus' example teaches us that prayer is about relationship. When Jesus prays, he is not performing a duty; he is getting close to his Father.

Yet then the author goes on to make it se I am very ambivalent about this book. While there are parts that I really enjoyed, there are other parts that really annoyed me.

I enjoyed learning about the author's autistic daughter Kim. He is very open with the struggles she has faced, and the prayers he has had for her over the years.

The author also says that Jesus' example teaches us that prayer is about relationship. When Jesus prays, he is not performing a duty; he is getting close to his Father.

Yet then the author goes on to make it seem as though prayer is hard, and even makes it out to be work. He talks about creating prayer cards to flip through every time you pray, focusing on all the individuals close to you, cards for areas of your life you want to improve, and cards for friends and non-believers, and to pray the prayers on these cards over and over. Or if you don't want to do cards he says to create a prayer journal along the same idea. He believes that if we don't write down our prayer requests, we don't take prayer seriously. Seriously?

Then the author goes on to describe a summary of a typical morning of prayer for him. This summary included setting his alarm for five forty to get up to pray, then sleeping through the alarm for five minutes, than crawling out of bed, getting dressed, and going down to a living room chair to pray through his cards. Then, as soon as he sat down, his autistic daughter began to pace upstairs, so she had to yell at her to go back to bed. Then he prayed through his cards, then his daughter started pacing again, so he yelled at her again to go back to bed, then he prayed more through his cards. Then he was again interrupted by his autistic daughter pacing upstairs, so he stopped praying, went upstairs (since yelling at her wasn't working) and told her to stay in bed. This made her so angry she bit her arm. Then he threatened to take away privileges for the day, which made her bite her arm again. After she calmed down, he went back to his praying.

The author apparently wrote about the interruptions from his autistic daughter to show that prayer time may not be perfect. Yet the whole time I was reading his prayer scenario, all I could think was "This is not how prayer is supposed to be" and "This is not what God would want for prayer time". I wanted to tell him "Put down your cards, and go comfort and deal with your daughter." I don't understand why he felt he had to set an alarm (which he wanted to sleep through) to pray. Pray in your own bed. Comfort your daughter, lay down with her if you want her to stay in bed, and pray while laying in bed with her. Pray in the shower. Pray while driving. Pray while going for a walk. Why make prayer a chore? Why yell at and neglect your family because they are interrupting your prayer time? I just didn't get it.

Yet this book has excellent reviews and a very high average rating here on Goodreads, so maybe I am missing his point. Or maybe his idea of praying and my idea of praying just don't match. ...more

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Jun 26, 2010 Elizabeth rated it it was amazing

Shelves: nf-spiritual

I wish I had read this book 30 years ago so that by now I would have re-read it several times. As faithful as I have tried to be to my spiritual habits, personal prayer has often eluded me and felt dry and mechanical. I've read books about it and talked to friends about it, but there was always a disconnect between the idea of prayer (and now I realize my misconceptions about prayer) and the reality of a regular prayer life. Paul Miller's gift in this book is to bring prayer into the realm of a I wish I had read this book 30 years ago so that by now I would have re-read it several times. As faithful as I have tried to be to my spiritual habits, personal prayer has often eluded me and felt dry and mechanical. I've read books about it and talked to friends about it, but there was always a disconnect between the idea of prayer (and now I realize my misconceptions about prayer) and the reality of a regular prayer life. Paul Miller's gift in this book is to bring prayer into the realm of a real person's real life by lifting the burden of legalism and formulas and the notion that there's a right way to pray and a wrong way to pray. That's like telling a child he can only talk to his parent in one way or the parent will ignore him!

Here are some of my take-aways from this book:

1) I need to talk to God in the same way and with the same attitude I would use in speaking to a trusted friend or loved one.
2) I need to stop worrying about whether I've carved out the proper prayer time or quiet time and just start talking to God whenever or wherever it occurs to me."Prayer is meant to be the conversation where your life and your God meet." "Talking life over with this on-scene God is the sort of conversation worth calling 'prayer.'"
3) I need to stop categorizing the things that are worthy--or not worthy--of prayer and remember that God cares about every aspect of my life. If it matters to me, it matters to Him.
4)Meaningful prayer is not achieved by focusing on prayer itself but on God. "In prayer, focusing on the conversation is like trying to drive while looking at the windshield instead of through it."
5) Prayer is not an isolated part of life. "Many people's frustrations with prayer come from working on prayer as a discipline in the abstract."
6) Prayer is not supposed to take us out of the world. Prayer is a tool for connecting with God in the midst of our life's craziness. My favorite quote from the whole book is this: "Learning to pray doesn't offer us a less busy life; it offers us a less busy heart. In the midst of outer busyness, we can develop an inner quiet."

Now that is a goal worth praying for!

...more

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May 14, 2021 Cindy Rollins rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: 2021, christian-living

Perfect devotional read with an honest take on what talking to God looks like. Very encouraging, sometimes odd, but a genuinely great book on prayer. I appreciate the whole Miller family and their books.

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Sep 23, 2011 Barnabas Piper rated it it was amazing

If I could give this book six stars I would. Maybe it was simply the right book for the right time in my life, but Paul Miller's insights into having a praying life are profound. He simplifies prayer to the point of extreme accessibility while simultaneously raising ones understanding and faith in a big, sovereign God. There isn't a Christian in the world who wouldn't benefit in some way from this book. ...more

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Jan 28, 2012 Nathan Moore rated it liked it

I'm somewhat ambivalent about this book. Partly because many raving reviews led to high expectations on my part and partly because this is an odd book. The phrase that kept coming to my mind while I read it was "A Praying Memoir" for that's what it felt like. Though perhaps more often than necessary, Miller gave dozens of personal stories that gave the book a helpful, earthy feel. I appreciate the author's grittiness and willingness to take all the frustrations of a praying life seriously. The b I'm somewhat ambivalent about this book. Partly because many raving reviews led to high expectations on my part and partly because this is an odd book. The phrase that kept coming to my mind while I read it was "A Praying Memoir" for that's what it felt like. Though perhaps more often than necessary, Miller gave dozens of personal stories that gave the book a helpful, earthy feel. I appreciate the author's grittiness and willingness to take all the frustrations of a praying life seriously. The book was a strange mixture of really helpful thoughts followed by too many antidotes and personal details. I can however, see how this would appeal to some readers.

Using the Lord's prayer in the Garden as the primary model, Miller's treatment of Biblical teaching on prayer was very sparse and thus widely assumed. This is not to say that he did not have some helpful observations, just that this work lacked a Biblical treatment of prayer. His focus was much more on how to fit that practically into life. It should also be noted that there are several places where it is evident that Miller has been influenced by the Mystics. His mystic streaks detract some from the value of this work.

The most helpful parts of the book to me included his thoughts on what it means to become like a child in prayer, praying 'in God's story,' and his prayer card system.

While reading "A Praying Life," I simultaneously read C.S. Lewis' "Letters to Malcolm: Chiefly on Prayer" Though I wasn't expecting many similarities, these books couldn't be more different. Lewis' thoughts were, as one might expect, much more philosophical as Lewis tried to grapple with the many extravagant promises regarding prayer in the Scriptures. Lewis seemed unable to come away with many conclusions. This reminded me that the current corpus of literature has a massive gap regarding the subject of prayer. This makes me judge Miller's effort more positively because prayer is quite mysterious. There is something good to be said for Miller's admirable attempts to, in spite of many unresolved mysteries, provide us a gritty memoir of how to pray. Notwithstanding this commendable effort, may I suggest that the reception of this book suggests that the church needs to do a whole lot more thinking (& writing) on the subject of prayer?

If you are looking for a deeply intimate, highly practical treatment of how to incorporate prayer into your life, this may be helpful to you. ...more

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Jul 31, 2020 Susy C. *MotherLambReads* rated it it was amazing

Shelves: christian-non-fiction, paper-books

"Without the Good Shepherd, we are alone in a meaningless story. Weariness and fear leave us feeling overwhelmed, unable to move. Cynicism leaves us doubting, unable to dream. The combination shuts down our hearts, and we just show up for life, going through the motions.”
....

“Prayer is asking God to incarnate, to get dirty in your life. Yes, the eternal God scrubs floors. For sure we know he washes feet. So take Jesus at his word. Ask him. Tell him what you want. Get dirty. Write out your prayer ...more

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Feb 04, 2015 Jamie rated it it was amazing

Shelves: 2015, 2018

Without a doubt, I know the incredible and amazing power of prayer. I’ve witnessed it and have felt it, yet it’s still something I can always/need to deepen in my life. Anyone else out there like that? Well, recently my best friend got this for me and there were so many excellent pieces of wisdom, I had to share this one with y’all!

“Christians aren’t superior, but our Savior is. He makes the difference. He is alive and well in His church.”

Full of wisdom and examples from his own life, Miller isn ...more

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Jul 07, 2009 Bob Hayton rated it it was amazing

Shelves: christian-living

As a lifelong Christian, I've heard a great deal of teaching about prayer and read a good many books on the topic. I've been taught to model my prayers on The Lord's Prayer. I've learned the ACTS method (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication). I've been encouraged to trust God for impossible answers, and above all, I've been made very aware of my spiritual shortcomings with regard to the discipline of regular, personal prayer.

Like many, I have tended to view prayer as a spiritual dis ...more

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Aug 06, 2020 Rachel Harp rated it it was amazing

A sweet, practical, and Biblical insight and guide to prayer - communing with God, finding authenticity through honest words, and learning to hope again.

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Jan 31, 2020 Brian rated it it was amazing

Unspeakably good. This book really grew with me every time I returned to the content.

I first was exposed to Miller and his message about prayer at a conference in my local community. I thought that it was the speaker's book, and so I came to the book with a very different set of expectations. I also have always struggled with the idea of a "personal relationship with God," since for me people speaking and responding to me is the main way I connect with them, and God does not normally do that. Th Unspeakably good. This book really grew with me every time I returned to the content.

I first was exposed to Miller and his message about prayer at a conference in my local community. I thought that it was the speaker's book, and so I came to the book with a very different set of expectations. I also have always struggled with the idea of a "personal relationship with God," since for me people speaking and responding to me is the main way I connect with them, and God does not normally do that. That and the characteristics of the speaker made me avoid this book. I probably have never made a bigger mistake.

I came to it a second time some years later, and was more sympathetic, having experienced a little more life experience. I also may have read Lindsey Tollefson's Psalms for Trials book, which is just fantastic and covers a lot of the same ideas (don't feel that your prayers are too small for God, trials are designed to make you depend on Him more, be regular and don't be ashamed because you have not been regular lately).

I got the book for Christmas one year and, after a year-long break, I finally hesitated back and forth and finally decided to dip into it. I love it now. The author is FAR from naive, but his basic point is that you need to be like a child. You need to regularly just present whatever you are feeling before God. There's more lessons, but that's step one. Because that's the theme, you can't dislike whatever he says.

But this time around I liked almost everything. He would talk about handling criticism, praying for other people without trying to "fix" them, unanswered prayers after long waiting, and all sorts of helpful wisdom. It also was a huge ethos boost that he was a dad with a child with a disability, which meant that he knew exactly what distraction is for families. He also lost his daughter to cancer and doesn't offer easy answers; but he knows who the answer is. There is no false spirituality. He even threaded the problems of charismatic idolization of intuition and he had a very sound way for parsing how to hear the voice of God. I am not sure I buy it completely, but I am aware that perhaps this is the result of cynicism (another theme he tears to pieces in a helpful way, while emphasizing we must be wise).

Despite being very child-like, he pops out odd-balls of wisdom like these, "Neoplatonism seeped into the church, equating spirituality with a suppression of desire and emotion. That's why Jesus comes across in so many films a bit strange and effeminate. He walks slowly, talks slowly, and moves slowly. You want to put a pin in him." Ouch!

And this: "The simplicity and clarity of God's word ... keeps me from getting lost in my feelings.... I wonder if the 'dark night of the soul' that many mystics experience is just getting lost in the darkness of their hearts." I laughed at that.

So this proved to be one of my favorite books. I won't be starting a prayer journal or a paper list (I prefer my cell-phone, which I can whip out of my pocket at any time), but this book encouraged me to pray. Indeed, one of my favorite points is that he says that ACTS is great (look it up), but you need to remember not all your conversations with God should be according to a schedule. Keep some of it freed up. Buy this book or let me lend it to you. ...more

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Apr 06, 2019 Bambi Moore rated it really liked it

Shelves: doctrine, spiritual-growth, books-of-2019

This book had some 3 star moments as well as a few 5. I loved the chapter on lamenting in prayer and I will be using some of the practical suggestions immediately. Overall a very encouraging book to integrate prayer into the very fabric of our lives.

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Jan 15, 2013 Bill Stutzman rated it really liked it

After hearing this book referenced in sermons from a few different pastors and friends, I added it to my reading list with modest hopes but not high expectations. I have long desired to grow in my prayer disciplines, but I am also wary of books I perceive to be "self-help" or systematic regarding such disciplines. There is no doubt that pitfalls abound in the genre, but Miller navigates the subject with wisdom and humility. As for me, I found my skepticism conquered by Miller's sound, sincere, a After hearing this book referenced in sermons from a few different pastors and friends, I added it to my reading list with modest hopes but not high expectations. I have long desired to grow in my prayer disciplines, but I am also wary of books I perceive to be "self-help" or systematic regarding such disciplines. There is no doubt that pitfalls abound in the genre, but Miller navigates the subject with wisdom and humility. As for me, I found my skepticism conquered by Miller's sound, sincere, and practical treatment of prayer. Best of all, I found myself refreshed and spurred on to love and good deeds through prayer in ways that I had hoped but never anticipated. This book persuaded me to change several habits in my life while avoiding guilt-tactics or programs bound to fail. I soon found myself joining the chorus of voices recommending this book for its challenging call to recapture one of Christendom's central spiritual disciplines in our own time.

Miller's approach depends on a blend of scriptural examples and personal anecdotes as he helps the reader see his own relation to God in a new light. He powerfully blends truths from the word with his own successes and failures in the practice of prayer, drawing upon years of trial and triumph in his own family. Through his vulnerability he challenges readers to give credit and glory to God for answering the smallest of prayers up to the grandest, both in a moment and over years and years of faithful pleading. Miller invites the reader to consider the way God uses prayer for others to shape and prune us at the same time. He begins with qualifications for approaching God: childlike faith and genuine need. Avoiding overly prescriptive advice, he presents the principles of prayer through reorienting the reader to the nature of God's character, the purpose of prayer, and our own dependency upon Jesus. His own stories of God's powerful work in his family (and especially the way prayer influenced his roles as husband and father) provide powerful testimony to the wisdom and grace of God, much of which takes a long view to see. Through these examples we are invited to look back on the narratives of our own lives for what God has done, and we are given a reason to hope and expect even mightier things in the narrative to come. Miller shows us how prayer opens our eyes to that narrative and magnifies God before our eyes and those of others. Perhaps most importantly, he reminds the reader of the power of using God's own word in prayer, offering back to Him scripture as applied to our own lives and for those for whom we are praying. I have been amazed at the power of this simple suggestion and practice as captured from the spirit of the psalms and other scriptures.

Miller's book resonated with me on a number of levels, dealing with the specific discipline of prayer and seeing our lives in the context of God's narrative for us (and all the world) particularly. I approached this book looking for a way to refresh my ideas of prayer and see if I could latch onto something that would jog me out of my rut. While most of what Miller offers through the book works to get the reader reawakened to the power of God through specific prayer (thus accomplishing the reorientation of the heart), he also provided helpful suggestions for making changes, both practical and attainable. While never presented in the form of legalistic rules, these suggestions nonetheless gave traction around his guiding principles. Since reading this book and following just a few of his suggestions as adapted to my own context, I have been amazed at how God has opened new vistas in this area of my life.

Like many life-changing books, this one may have to come across your desk at just the right moment in order to grip you. Perhaps you are already well-established in prayer. In that case this book may reinforce what you already know (as it often did for me as well). God had been preparing my heart and desires for some time in this topic through my own need and the recommendation of others, and I am grateful for how He used Miller's book. I was ready for help but wary of taking poor advice, trying and failing, or setting up a new legalism. Miller's A Praying Life answered each of those concerns directly (and more) and, through the work of the Holy Spirit, encouraged me with a renewed attitude toward God, His word, and my neighbors in prayer. If you are interested in principles of corporate prayer, you will find this book addresses more the private disciplines, though similar principles may be extended. With a multitude of books to choose from and only so much time to spend, no one wants to read a bad book. For the 21st century Christian in need of a return to the priceless heritage of personal prayer, I couldn't recommend a book more worth your time.

...more

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Oct 09, 2021 Erica rated it really liked it

4.5⭐
Written in an engaging, conversational way. Very thought provoking. I especially enjoyed the chapter where he talked about how many of us separate our praying life from our daily,mundane life.

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Jun 24, 2021 Aaron Beane rated it it was amazing

Shelves: books-to-read-with-andrea

WARNING!!!! May cause liquid to flow from eyes. Miller’s theological acumen, mixed with his experiential grasp of his relationship with God through Christ came through on every page. Prayer is certainly the topic of the book, but what you get is what the entire Christian life looks like, namely, living in Gods world, before Gods face, for Gods glory, for Jesus sake. His stories that he weaves in are potent, and his authenticity is winsome. Prayer is never to be divorced from our real lives, and ...more

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Aug 26, 2017 Abby rated it it was amazing

Shelves: spirituality, 2017

Wonderful book on prayer. The stories about how God used prayer to transform him and his family were really beautiful. This book has been such a help and encouragement to me the past few months. I think I will keep revisiting it in the future.

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Jan 06, 2015 Bill rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Brilliant book, transformative for my prayer life. This was my second time reading it - immediately following the first time!

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Sep 07, 2020 Caroline Mann rated it really liked it

Shelves: 2020

When one of my best and most treasured friends, Annie, gave me this book as a gift, I felt conflicted.

I felt grateful because I know Annie doesn’t recommend books lightly. She has both excellent taste and a close attention for the preferences of friends.

I felt disheartened because of the title - A Praying Life. I have a hard enough time with a few minutes of prayer. A praying life? .....okay.... The thing is, I grew up in a Christian home and in a Christian community and prayer has almost alwa ...more

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May 27, 2020 Mackayla Headlee rated it it was amazing

I read this book as a part of a book club with some fellow Bible Study Fellowship leaders and WOW I could not have loved it more. It really makes you take a hard look at your prayer life, and re-centers you on the heart of what prayer is: a way for us to grow closer to God. I loved how vulnerable Paul is in this book. He has not had an easy life by any means, but he still boasts of the blessings he has received and the transformative work God has done for him and his family through prayer. He ha ...more

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May 22, 2020 Ari DeBenedictis rated it really liked it

I read this book over the course of 5 months, which for me, probably wasn't the best just because I forget things sooo easily. However, for the first few months, I read this with a friend which was nice to discuss stuff with.

One of my favorite things about the book was Paul's position about prayer. He didn't come across as arrogant or "my way or the highway" but instead took a humbling approach and explained his own struggles and how that transformed his prayer life. I really appreciated this a ...more

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May 23, 2020 Michelle Sauvageau rated it it was amazing

Shelves: faith

This book was packed with small take aways that can be incorporated into daily prayer life, as well as larger scale themes that explain why prayer is vital to our faith and relationship with God. Paul Miller was so down to earth in his struggles with prayer and also his examples of how prayer has changed his life, along with others in his family and ministry. This is a book I will be going back to at many points in my life.

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Oct 10, 2017 Cara Putman rated it really liked it

This book is a practical guide to prayer in the trenches of life. It will open your eyes to ways you can pray and truly surrender to God's will for your life. And the ways He will change you in the process. ...more

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Jan 30, 2019 Christian Neufeld rated it it was amazing

Shelves: deeper-insight

Great book! It helped me learn a lot about naked and honest prayers in the midst of difficult situations.

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Apr 19, 2019 Robin Langford rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

For years I have struggled with feeling hopeless to ever enjoy Real intimacy and effectiveness in prayer. I pray in fits and starts, sometimes consistently, other times not at all or grudgingly. Always, always, I want more, but have felt like I didn’t know how to put into action what I wanted to be true. “Trusting God” in this area has felt like laziness, not actually trusting.
For these reasons this book has been a breath of fresh air. He addresses some common barriers to consistency, Faith, an ...more

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Sep 06, 2017 Tori Samar rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Recommended to Tori by: Luke

Shelves: christian, nonfiction, own-print, 2020-reading, favorites, christian-living-and-growth, prayer

One phrase comes to mind whenever I think of A Praying Life: paradigm shift. I've read plenty of books that challenged, educated, stretched, encouraged, fascinated, or even annoyed me. But for all that reading, I have encountered very few books whose ideas were powerful enough to completely shift my perspective from one place to another. While I've had many books expand or tweak my thinking on an issue, I've had relatively few revolutionize it.

This book has the honor of being part of that small One phrase comes to mind whenever I think of A Praying Life: paradigm shift. I've read plenty of books that challenged, educated, stretched, encouraged, fascinated, or even annoyed me. But for all that reading, I have encountered very few books whose ideas were powerful enough to completely shift my perspective from one place to another. While I've had many books expand or tweak my thinking on an issue, I've had relatively few revolutionize it.

This book has the honor of being part of that small list.

So let me explain just a few of the ideas that grabbed hold of me most:

1. When I first read this book, I wanted ideas on how to have a better, more consistent prayer time. Instead, I got invigorated to have a better praying life. Paul Miller is all for having a consistent, daily time of prayer (preferably first thing in the morning). But what he really wants is for us to see how prayer weaves into every nook and cranny of our lives. Once we grasp prayer as our communication line with our Father, and once we grasp our complete dependency on Him to make a difference in our lives (both inner and outer!), we won't be able to help but keep that communication line open 24/7.

2. I want to be the kind of person who prays for a parking spot. Say what? At the beginning of Chapter 14, Miller mentions reading a book in which the author said not to pray for trivial things like parking spaces because such requests are just selfish. When Miller shares this remark with his mother, her response goes like this: "She looked a little incredulous, cocked her head, started laughing, and said, 'How else would you find a parking place?'" The simplicity of his mother's reaction astounded and humbled me when I read it, and it still does today. She is 100% right. How else would you find one? Somewhere along the way, I (and many other Christians) bought into the lie that God doesn't care about or have anything to do with the mundane details of life. We get to (or have to) be in control of those things; we are not dependent on Him in those areas. Not so, says Miller:"The little child that Jesus urged us to become is completely dependent on his parents for everything." Closely tied to this lie is the lie that God wants our submission to His will to be so deep that we never actually tell Him what we want. We ask for things, almost guiltily, but then "submit so quickly that [we] disappear." Miller calls this "overspiritualizing" prayer. Guilty. Guilty on all counts. God, give me a heart to include You in every aspect of my life and to be honest with You!

3. Ask God for change. Don't be a cynic. Don't be afraid that He'll actually do it. Ask God to change you, your loved ones, and your world. Miller exposed my cynicism in not praying well for others who struggle with besetting sins. I don't pray for them as I ought because I don't actually think they can ever change. The same principle applies to praying for the sin-beset world and culture in which we live. Miller also exposed my hesitancy to pray honestly for God to change me because I'm afraid (and also a massive control-freak): "Almost every Christian is confident God will answer a prayer for change in us, and it scares us to death. For example, what happens if you pray for patience? God permits suffering in your life. What happens if you pray for humility? God humbles you. We're scared of such prayers because we want to remain in control of our lives. We don't trust God." Yes, indeed, it is a terrifying thing to ask the Potter to change me. I know He's not just going to snap His fingers and fix my flaws. He's going to poke and push and prod and leave me in the fire until I'm in the shape of His Son.

4. I need to watch for the story God is weaving in my life and others' lives. I need to be willing to stay in the desert. Miller encourages us to see unanswered prayers as evidence that God is still telling the story He wants to tell. Don't grow impatient with Him and take matters into your own hands, fighting to close the gap between your present reality and your hope for the future. And don't give up. Keep praying. Watch to see how the story goes as you pray and take action when it's time (because what Miller has learned is that as he prays and watches, God expects him to get involved in his own prayers). This is a major area of my life in which God continues to work on me. Waiting is such a struggle for me. Being patient in the story is hard. So God, please give me a heart that is willing to wait. Give me the faith to stay in the desert as long as you ask me to. Give me a heart that delights to see how you want to tell my story.

Honestly, this review only grazes the surface of good things in this book. So please, just read it. Read it and be changed. ...more

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Jul 01, 2019 Keller Hackbusch rated it it was amazing

Simply wonderful.

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Apr 07, 2021 Nathan Slonaker rated it really liked it · review of another edition

“self-will and prayer are both ways of getting things done. at the center of self-will is me, carving a world in my image, but at the center of prayer is God, carving me in his Son’s image.”

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Nov 26, 2020 Ryan Watkins rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: theology, major-influence

This is an amazing book on prayer. It made me realize the errors in my own thinking that had fallen into something more stoic or at other times epicurean than Christian. I also highly recommend the author’s advice to start a prayer journal.

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Mar 20, 2011 Demetrius Rogers rated it it was amazing

Shelves: spiritual-formation

High performance, low pretension. That's what this book is to me.

Read it back in 2010, and picked up again this year and found it just as good and inspiring. Usually pragmatic books bore me. They seem too boxy, too predictable, perhaps, even too pretentious. But this book has a different feel to me. It's not flat and two-dimensional, it's pithy. And there's meat on the bones. And when I say meat I'm not just talking about proof texts - there's insight here. I love insight. There's depth here. D ...more

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Feb 05, 2020 Jenny Hartfelder rated it it was amazing

Shelves: spiritual-growth, 2020-intentional-reading, 2020-top-ten

What an encouragement this book was. 💗 The early chapters began with a non-critical, yet accurate depiction of the sad state of most Christians' prayer lives. Let's just say that the description resonated with me. 🙄 🙈 And yet, as I continued to read and he described what a praying life can and should look like ... I realized that it hasn't always been that way. And slowly ... wrestling through those awkward feelings of "Ummm, it's been a while, God..." ... I've begun to pick back up that convers ...more

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About Paul E. Miller

Paul E. Miller

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Books by Paul E. Miller

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“God takes everyone he loves through a desert. It is his cure for our wandering hearts, restlessly searching for a new Eden...
The best gift of the desert is God's presence... The protective love of the Shepherd gives me courage to face the interior journey.” — 50 likes

“To be cynical is to be distant. While offering a false intimacy of being "in the know," cynicism actually destroys intimacy. It leads to a creeping bitterness that can deaden and even destroy the spirit...
A praying life is just the opposite. It engaged evil. It doesn't take no for an answer. The psalmist was in God's face, hoping, dreaming, asking. Prayer is feisty. Cynicism, on the other hand, merely critiques. It is passive, cocooning itself from the passions of the great cosmic battle we are engaged in. It is without hope.” — 33 likes

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