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Tips on Having a Gay (Ex) Boyfriend

(Belle #1)

Carrie Jones (Goodreads Author)

3.69 · Rating details · 712 ratings · 91 reviews

FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF NEED AND CAPTIVATE
Winner of the 2008 Maine Literary Award! Dylan is Belle's true love-maybe even her soulmate. Until one day when Dylan drops the ultimate bomb; he's gay. Where, Belle wonders, does that leave her? And how will the rest of their small town deal with an openly gay Homecoming King? This beautifully written debut e ...more

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Hardcover, 278 pages

Published May 8th 2007 by Flux (first published May 1st 2007)

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· 712 ratings · 91 reviews

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Dec 16, 2007 Suzanne added it

Shelves: youngadult-fiction, did-not-finish

This is why I cannot finish this book:

Page 24: [Em's] always taking pictures ever since her dad died.

Page 40: Em started taking pictures a couple years ago when her father died.

Is the reader that stupid that he or she needs to be reminded why Em takes a lot of pictures? This [lack of editor presence] annoys me. I may have been able to overlook it and continue reading if I found the protagonist a teeny bit sympathetic. Instead, I kept thinking "Get over it! You're 17! You're going to date dozens ...more

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Mar 24, 2008 Kasia rated it did not like it

Shelves: youngadult, lbgtq

Something about this book just did not work for me. I was annoyed at all the gay stereotypes embodied in her gay ex, I mean, he loves STREISAND?! What a cliche. Also, I didn't like how the character gets her heart broken and immediately has another boy there to catch her when she falls (literally, because she has a fainting problem...). I liked the idea of the book, but that's about it.

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Sep 21, 2011 Mandi Martin rated it it was ok

I liked the title more than the book. The characters were pretty flat and the book was rather slow. The plot was minimal and could have been better developed. It was pretty unrealistic that she got over her boyfriend of two years in about two days. I liked the lists though. And......uhm I can't actually think of much else I liked. Fairly adequate description of 15 year old maturity and thought process....except the characters were 17......

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Jun 02, 2008 Sara rated it did not like it

I couldn't even finish this one, which is saying a lot, because I finish nearly everything, no matter how bad. Characters didn't make sense, I couldn't relate to the narrator, and the plot became way too predictable in an unrealistic and unsatisfying way, so I just quit. This is going back to the library posthaste.

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Apr 14, 2013 Rose rated it did not like it

Shelves: no, the-jones-woman, i-reviewed-this

as usual carrie jones has done a bang up job of writing a whole load of crap.

forget about the characters, forget about the gay ex boyfriend, forget about the intriguing title and book cover/collage thing they've got going on. put the book back down, remove it from your wishlist. click the tiny (x) on the top right corner of the web page. DO IT NOW!

basically do whatever you have to do to avoid the torture that is reading this vile excuse for YA Literature.

its not literature. I know you've all ( ...more

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Sep 08, 2008 Sean rated it it was ok

There were some things I liked about this book. The premise is a situation I've kind of lived through, albeit in reverse; the main character was often funny; her best friend was kinda cool. But I hated the straight love interest, I ended up hating the gay ex-boyfriend, I hated the soap-opera-ish turns in the plot and I hated the badly drawn caricatures that served as characters. And oh, my, did I hate the ending.

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Jul 08, 2014 Anna Bueller rated it did not like it

No baseball? No Jewish?? No gay baseball playing Jews?? Why would anyone even THINK about wanting to read this book????

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Sep 23, 2009 Heather rated it liked it

Shelves: ya-reads, library, series

Rating C

Review My thoughts on this book could not possibly be more mixed. No siree. That would not be feasible.

On the plus side: I am so hard-core loving the relationship between Belle and her rebound guy (Tom) that I'm going to rush to the library tonight and get the second book in this little saga (Love (And Other Uses for Duct Tape)). And I'll probably read it tonight. Other pluses are that I totally think that Dylan's angst is semi-believeable (in so much as I know what it's like to come out ...more

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Jul 17, 2010 Sue Larson rated it liked it

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.

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Jul 14, 2009 Kehyonah Graves added it

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Oct 25, 2009 Ms Threlkeld rated it did not like it

not worth reading - i didn't even finish it. there are so many other great queer YA books out there, don't waste your time on this one.

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Apr 18, 2010 Emily rated it did not like it

Shelves: hate-hate-hate

Soooo terribly written that I think I would rather roll down a hill of razors into a lake of lemon juice than finish reading this book. Yea, that bad.

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Jan 23, 2011 Heather Perkinson rated it it was amazing

Shelves: possible-gsa-titles, glbqt, realistic-fiction, romance

An endearing and absorbing romance that will appeal to gay and straight readers alike. Funny, suspenseful, and romantic, I didn't want to say goodbye to any of the characters when I got to the end.

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Sep 06, 2011 Thorn MotherIssues rated it it was ok

Shelves: lesbopalooza, read-2011

Blech. The sexual orientation and relationship stuff didn't seem realistic at all, nor did the characters work for me.

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Dec 28, 2016 Catherine Mustread rated it liked it

Recommended to Catherine by: Gold(tie) Youth Fiction Indie Awards '08

Shelves: teen, award, lgbt, first-in-series

Belle's range of emotions in the week following her boy-friend of two years breaking up with her after admitting that he is gay seemed believable though the following assortment of events seemed overdone. Still, an interesting read, and a reminder that my high school years are far far in the past and nothing like this book existed at that time.

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Oct 07, 2011 Marina rated it liked it

Shelves: teen-lit, series, 2013

I accidently read the sequel, Love and Other Uses for Duct Tape, for this book about a year ago, so I am finally reading this one. Yet, even a year later, I can see a drastic difference between the two books.

While the sequel was actually nice and decent, this book seemed repetitive and amateurish. I'm not sure if Jones realized it, but she did repeat a lot of things. Em's reason for always taking pictures is said like 3 times, Dylan's singing to the MC is said maybe 30 times, and Belle's shoes a I accidently read the sequel, Love and Other Uses for Duct Tape, for this book about a year ago, so I am finally reading this one. Yet, even a year later, I can see a drastic difference between the two books.

While the sequel was actually nice and decent, this book seemed repetitive and amateurish. I'm not sure if Jones realized it, but she did repeat a lot of things. Em's reason for always taking pictures is said like 3 times, Dylan's singing to the MC is said maybe 30 times, and Belle's shoes are described in detail way too many times. I also didn't understand these random breaks that Jones kept throwing in. You'd think that they're there to move from one scene to another, to show the start and end of a memory or something, but sometimes the breaks would happen in the middle of a scene, of a conversation, even a thought that connected with the passage before the break. I guess she did it just to add emphasis to a certain scene, but it just made the reading process jolty and irritating.

The story itself was vague. I thought this book would express the acceptance of gay people in there community, but the whole book seemed to focus solely on Belle and her relationships. At the end of the book, we know that Belle is accepted and loved, but Dylan is just moved to the corner. We know that Belle and her circle of friends accepts him, but the rest of the school? They're too busy cheering for Belle to kind of look at see that Dylan is in fact still gay, and literally a couple days before the end of the book 37 different people called him a fag. (Of course, I've read the second book already, so I know he really is accepted, but why didn't Jones express that?)

And even then, the relationships in here moved way too fast. A day after they break up, Dylan is with Bob, and four days after that, Belle is with Tom. I mean, I guess I can see how fast Dylan was able to move on, seeing as he never actually loved loved Belle, and being gay and all he just didn't feel for her anymore. But Belle? All she could talk about was how much she loved him and how her entire life was changed, and grossly about how much sex they had and how their souls belonged together, and then four days later she's kissing another boy. Apparently her and Tom have always had feelings for each other, but they were just "suppressed for the duration of Belle and Dylan's relationship. Regardless of that little fun fact, I just thought it was too fast, too soon, even if Belle has always liked Tom, and vice versa.

I really didn't even get into the book until the end of it. It was then that most of the action and drama happened, with Belle's confrontation of Mimi, Eddie's attack, Belle's seizure, and then Dylan and Eddie's fight.

But, enough of all this. I can't exactly go hard on this book because I know the sequel's a little better, and it is an original story that has it's drama and little town-ness going on. It's just a mellow, easy read, even if it somewhat lacks a driving message. ...more

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Apr 22, 2013 Marsha rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: romance, young-adult, lgbtq, literature-fiction

The story is told entirely from Belle Philbrick’s own point of view, so we see the full spectrum of her emotions. The author has given her a rather lyrical, almost poetic, turn of mind, making her more stirring than most teenaged protagonists.

But I was a little ambivalent about her. I thought it rather unrealistic that she gave herself only one week to whine and complain about her losing her boyfriend. She’d loved this boy for years; did she honestly expect to get over him in one week? Also, he The story is told entirely from Belle Philbrick’s own point of view, so we see the full spectrum of her emotions. The author has given her a rather lyrical, almost poetic, turn of mind, making her more stirring than most teenaged protagonists.

But I was a little ambivalent about her. I thought it rather unrealistic that she gave herself only one week to whine and complain about her losing her boyfriend. She’d loved this boy for years; did she honestly expect to get over him in one week? Also, her best friend Emily’s attitude was a little annoying. At one moment, she came off as a superior know-it-all, prattling advice to the lovelorn and urging Belle to start dating again so as to stave off being a Mallory (a self-involved type given to the aforementioned whining and complaining). On the other hand, she acknowledged that Belle was vulnerable and she needed Emily as a comfort and should beware of rebounding. Huh?

I also felt less and less sympathetic towards Dylan. Yes, he’s gay and, yes, gay people get persecuted and it was terrible that people who originally seemed to like him started calling him “faggot” in the hallways. But it struck me as being highly selfish and whiny for him to barge into the local Amnesty club, punch in a wall and state that his problems should be put before those of people in foreign countries getting jailed, interrogated and tortured.

It also didn’t escape my attention that the day after he confessed his homosexuality to his girlfriend he was spotted by someone else kissing a boy in the parking lot. Unless he really is the fickle type, it’s clear that Dylan was having an affair behind Belle’s back and used his coming-out speech as a cover for his cheating. He confessed the former so he wouldn’t have to admit to the latter. So he got to pose as a beleaguered victim of other people’s homophobia instead of the cheating bastard he actually was. Neat trick, that.

Also, Belle gradually admitted that she smothered certain parts of her personality when she was with Dylan, making him just another ex-boyfriend who wasn’t quite as great as she thought he was. So Dylan’s homosexuality actually gets buried as the book continues, since Belle almost immediately finds herself falling for a boy she had a crush on for years. Therefore this is no longer about one poor boy’s heroic struggles at dealing with his homosexuality—just another story about teenaged love gone wrong.

No heroes and no villains in this story. Just a bunch of mixed-up adolescents sorting themselves out and trampling over other people in their rush to self-realization. Oh, and, yes, there is singing.
...more

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Jun 05, 2016 Ariel rated it really liked it

I'm pleasantly surprised by this book. Picked it up at a local thrift shop, I thought it would end up being a stupid book that was just something to read. Fortunately, I can say that's not the case. If you're the kind of person who likes books like "Planet Janet" then you'll like this book. I have to say, this book hits a little close to home for me in many ways. It's like, I decided to read this book at the right time in my life. Belle, the main character of the story, has seizures, like I do. ...more

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Apr 28, 2012 Dyan rated it liked it

Shelves: young-adult, novels

I must admit that the title and the blurb was enough to make me buy the book. The premise was interesting. The action all takes place within a week, and while the events that happen plot-wise are kinda slow, Belle's progression in moving on to another guy was kind of fast. There also seems to be some stereotyping of gay guys. What's freaky is that the author seems to anticipate the reactions that readers might have and a justification or reason follows these questionable events. At least the aut ...more

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Jan 27, 2016 Martha rated it liked it

Shelves: fiction, lgbt, realistic-fiction, recommended, young

In the small town of Eastbrook, Maine, everyone knows everyone’s business. But there’s one piece of business that’s a huge surprise to high school senior Belle Philbrick: Her longtime boyfriend, Dylan, is gay. Turns out he meant it sincerely every time he said he’d never love another woman. Hours after Dylan reveals his secret to Belle, he’s spotted in a parking lot with his boyfriend, band geek Bob. Although devastated, Belle refuses to wallow in self-pity and allows herself only seven days of ...more

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Jul 17, 2008 Sarah Woodard rated it it was amazing

Shelves: finished-copy, own, signed

Belle believes that Dylan is the one that she'll marry, but one day, Dylan tells her that he is gay. Belle wonders where does this leave her. Dylan and her have been best friends since they were little in their little town in Maine. Since they started dating, Belle has been known as Dylan's girlfriend or the other half of their couple hood.
Belle and her other best friend, Emily decide that she can only have a week to cry, because she doesn't want to become like Mallory. As the week goes on, Bel ...more

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Sep 07, 2009 Sarah rated it really liked it

This book was very satisfyingly complex; I stayed up late waiting for heartburn medication to kick in and ended up reading the entire book in one sitting. (I didn't make it to bed until one am and now I'm really tired.) Carrie Jones did a good job of making the characters emotional and upset is a realistic way, without making these teen's crises seem trivial or immature or whiny. The novel opens when the main character, who has dated (and slept with) her boyfriend for two years, finds out her bo ...more

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Oct 06, 2015 Lyn rated it liked it

Shelves: 1-ya, 2-bookloons, 3-gave-away, 3-gave-to-bookspot

Belle and Dylan have been going together for two years. In their small town of Eastbrook, Maine, everyone has them married and settled down with a house and a St. Bernard dog. Belle wishes that were true.

When Dylan breaks up with her, Belle is hurt and confused. Confused, because the reason he gives for the breakup is that he is gay. He loves her, he will always love her, but he is gay. How could she spend two years of her life loving a guy who is gay? How could she not know? Is she really that ...more

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May 30, 2010 Audrey added it

Belle and Dylan have been dating for years, and their entire small town things they're destined to be together. So when Dylan tells Belle he's gay, she is shocked. Was their entire relationship a lie? Is it fair to be mad at your boyfriend for being true to himself? Belle journals her journey to acceptance and understanding. She finds that even though her heart really hurts, things will eventually be okay and she will find love again.

Jones is excellent at capturing the emotions a girl feels when ...more

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Nov 08, 2010 Valerie rated it really liked it

This book started out weak and ended up strong. The writing was a little different and took some getting used to, but it wasn't obnoxious. There seemed to be some editing issues. For example, the main character said that her friend liked to take pictures because her dad died and she realized she wanted to have pictures of everyone to help remember them. Then, a few pages later, she says that her friend likes to take pictures because her dad died and they help her remember people from all angles ...more

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Dec 17, 2008 Sandy rated it it was amazing

Recommended to Sandy by: Patron

Shelves: teen, romance, lgbt, contemporary

High school senior and Harvest Queen Belle Philbrick's world is turned upside down when her boyfriend of over two years dumps her - after coming out of the closet. Now Belle has a huge range of emotions to deal with as she tries to come to terms with the news. Even worse is watching the rest of her small town community come to terms with this news - and some people certainly react badly. Belle is left to try to answer all of the questions that Dylan has left her with. Did she ever really underst ...more

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Oct 16, 2010 Vanessa rated it liked it

Recommends it for: teenage girls

I think this was a bit overwritten. The story is good, but the characters suffer from an overabundance of quirkiness and yet many of them still remain flat stereotypes of small town people and small town life.

That said, the teenage voices ring true without being grating, and if anything, it wasn't predictable solely for the fact that she left out the usual high school love-story cliches and the events felt true-to-life overall. The theme of finding not only oneself but also who one's friends ar ...more

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Oct 08, 2007 Devyn rated it it was amazing

Shelves: young-adult

Tips on Having a Gay (ex) Boyfriend

By: Carrie Jones

Belle is your normal high school girl. She has a wonderful boyfriend, great friends and the jocks always have a go at her. That is until the perfect boyfriend tells Belle he is gay.

Bell has to cope with the whole school finding out, and look back at her life with Dylan. Was she the only one who did not realize he was gay? As much as she wants to hate him she loves him even more. Living in a small town can be horrible if you are gay, can Belle sa ...more

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May 30, 2008 Kim rated it really liked it

At first, I wavered between three and four stars for this book and then very much landed on four mostly because this is a YA read and super relevant for that age group. Also, the book really picks up steam, but mostly I think this is a writer to watch. I think she's just going to get better and better. Her writing just sparkles in places and I really like her characters. I thought that the book lacked tension in places, that Belle didn't have to work too hard to have things happen for her, but I ...more

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Jan 09, 2009 Tortla rated it liked it

Shelves: feministy, ya-like

Ultimately kind of a happy-go-lucky YA romance which escapes the typical shallowness of that genre by actually saying some interesting things about sexuality and identity and maturity. Which is not to say that it doesn't sometimes take itself too seriously. But it has lists, and I'm a sucker for lists.

In the end, it reminded me a lot of This is All, because of the lists and the characters who are incredibly mature and able to recognize when they're succumbing to teenagey melodrama/angst. Also, I ...more

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About Carrie Jones

Carrie Jones

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Carrie Jones likes Skinny Cow fudgsicles and potatoes. She does not know how to spell fudgsicles. This has not prevented her from writing books. She lives with her cute family in Maine, but she grew up in Bedford, NH where she once had a séance with cool uber-comedian Sarah Silverman.

The Meyers brothers are from Bedford, too, so you’d think it would make Carrie funnier, coming from Bedford N.H. Ob Carrie Jones likes Skinny Cow fudgsicles and potatoes. She does not know how to spell fudgsicles. This has not prevented her from writing books. She lives with her cute family in Maine, but she grew up in Bedford, NH where she once had a séance with cool uber-comedian Sarah Silverman.

The Meyers brothers are from Bedford, too, so you’d think it would make Carrie funnier, coming from Bedford N.H. Obviously, something didn’t work.

Carrie has a large, skinny white dog and a fat cat. Both like fudgicles. Only the cat likes potatoes. This may be a reason for the kitty’s weight problem (Shh… don’t tell). Carrie has always liked cowboy hats but has never owned one. This is a very wrong thing. She graduated from Vermont College’s MFA program for writing. She has edited newspapers and poetry journals and has recently won awards from the Maine Press Association and also been awarded the Martin Dibner Fellowship as well as a Maine Literary Award.

Here’s the lowdown about Carrie…

1. Carrie can not drink coffee. It makes her insane. Do not give her caffeine.
2. Carrie is very responsive to loving strokes on the hair, kind of like a puppy. However, do not do this without asking first unless you are a ridiculously handsome man or an editor who is about to offer her a trillion dollars for the first draft of her novel.
3. Carrie is secretly really, really shy even though she’s pathetically outgoing in person. She has a very hard time calling people. So, if you want to talk to her, make the first move. And, if you’re her in-Maine female best friend, Jennifer, do NOT get mad at her because she is so bad at returning emails.
4. Carrie sometimes wears mismatched socks, if you do not think this is cool, do not tell her. You will hurt her feelings.
5. Carrie really, really wants you to like her books. Please like her books. PLEEEAASSSEEEE. She’ll be your best friend forever. That is, if you want a friend who is shy about calling and emailing and who wears mismatched socks and can’t drink caffeine and likes being pet on the head. Hhmmm….
6. Carrie is not above begging.
7. Carrie, like Belle in TIPS ON HAVING A GAY (ex) BOYFRIEND drinks Postum. It’s for the same reason, too.
8. Carrie loves Great Pyrenees dogs. They are huge and white, and furry and it looks like they have white eyeliner and mascara on, which is way too cute. Do you have one? Send a picture!
9. Carrie lives in Maine. She has a hard time with this in the winter. It is bleak in Maine in the winter. Imagine everything shades of gray and brown and no green anywhere except for in people’s noses. This is Maine in Winter. Maine in summer is the best place in the world, so it’s a trade-off. Feel free to invite Carrie to your house in the winter, but not if it’s in Greenland, Canada, or anywhere north of Florida.
10. Forget that. She’d still probably come.
...more