Excellent Advice for Living: Wisdom I Wish I'd Known Earlier

by Kevin Kelly

“I love aphorisms, proverbs, and Secrets of Adulthood . . . Excellent Advice for Living includes wise, practical advice for life.” — Gretchen Rubin, via Twitter

“One hundred years from now, when so much of the nonsense of our age is forgotten, people will still remember Kevin Kelly and his wisdom.” —Seth Godin

“All will benefit from [Kelly's] idiosyncratic wit and wry humor.” — People

Wise, practical, optimistic life advice from author and leading technology thinker Kevin Kelly

On his 68th birthday, Kevin Kelly began to write down for his young adult children some things he had learned about life that he wished he had known earlier.  To his surprise, Kelly had more to say than he thought, and kept adding to the advice over the years, compiling a life’s wisdom into these pages. 

Kelly’s timeless advice covers an astonishing range, from right living to setting ambitious goals, optimizing generosity, and cultivating compassion. He has wisdom for career, relationships, parenting, and finances, and gives guidance for practical matters ranging from travel to troubleshooting.

Excellent Advice for Living is aimed primarily at young people, but speaks to all ages. This is the ideal companion for anyone seeking to navigate life with grace and creativity.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Philosophy, Personal Development, Psychology, Productivity, Audiobook

224 pages, Hardcover

Published May 2, 2023

About the author

Kevin Kelly is Senior Maverick at Wired magazine. He co-founded Wired in 1993, and served as its Executive Editor from its inception until 1999. He is also editor and publisher of the Cool Tools website, which gets half a million unique visitors per month. From 1984-1990 Kelly was publisher and editor of the Whole Earth Review, a journal of unorthodox technical news. He co-founded the ongoing Hackers' Conference, and was involved with the launch of the WELL, a pioneering online service started in 1985. He authored the best-selling New Rules for the New Economy and the classic book on decentralized emergent systems, Out of Control."

Reviews

[Sheri · Rating 5 out of 5]

A lifetime's worth of advice compiled into short, memorable axioms. Simply, good guidance for all aspects of life including business, relationships, health, and wealth. Easy to read, harder to follow!

"You lead by letting others know what you expect of them, which may exceed what they themselves expect. Provide them a reputation that they can step up to."

"If you ask for someone's feedback, you'll get a critic. If you ask for someone's advice, you'll get a partner."

"Forgiveness is accepting the apology you will never get."

"Experience is overrated. Most breakthrough accomplishments were done by people doing them for the first time. Therefore, when hiring, hire for aptitude and attitude and then train for skills."

"How to apologize: quickly, specifically, sincerely. Don't ruin an apology with an excuse."

"If your goal does not have a schedule, it is a dream."

"Don't ever work for someone you don't want to become."

"Trust the 3-star product reviews because they tell both the good and the bad, which is the real state for most things."

"Even if you don't say anything. if you listen carefully, people will consider you a great conversationalist."

"It's unfortunate when someone you carefully trained leaves; but it is worse if you don't train them and they stay."

"Trust is earned in drops and lost in buckets. Unwavering honesty will help seal in trust."

"If you don't care about your people, they won't care about your mission."

Appreciate and benefit from this gathered knowledge and reap the rewards of greater success and self-worth and overall easier living.

[Julie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this is a book worth owning and reading very slowly, maybe one aphorism per day and meditating on it. Or, just picking it up every now and then. The advice is sound, logical, and heartfelt. It's wisdom for living. Here are a few of my favorites (in order as they appear in the book), believe me, it was hard to narrow it down to just a few:

"When you forgive others, they may not notice, but you will heal.
Forgiveness is not something we do for others; it is a gift to ourselves."

"When you lead, your real job is to create more leaders, not more followers."

"You can really change someone's life for the better simply by offering words of encouragement."

"The best way to advise young people is to find out what they really want to do and then advise them to do it."

"The chief prevention against getting old is to remain astonished."

[Milan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is made of pithy quotes with loads of practical advice. There are no attributions. Some are useful, some made me think and others are inspiring. We need more books like this.

[Bejinha · Rating 2 out of 5]

The whole thing is online on his blog post.

[Martina · Rating 1 out of 5]

Non c’è nessun pianeta o universo in cui io concepisca dare più di una stella a questo libro.

[Santhosh Guru · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kevin Kelly is a legend, if you are into the rabbit hole of tech journalism. He is the founder of the legendary WIRED magazine, worked with Stewart Brand on Whole earth catalog and so on. He and his blog are quite old and very interesting, as he digs deep into weird and curious areas - tools, photos, odd documentaries. He literally wrote the manifesto for the creator economy in the “1000 true fans” blog.

Kevin’s writing style is not great but the curiosity and the breadth of interests are always amazing. I like his works because he tries to connect with the ever evolving audience and grow his audience judiciously. Audience building is something everyone is curious about. So, his books, YouTube videos, podcasts appearances or blogs are great examples of writing a content, distributing it well to the right audience.

The content of this book is a rehash of blogs that he has written over a long time. It’s very quick read, I could get this done in less than an hour. What I specifically like in this book is this advice: “Advice like these are not laws. They are like hats. If one doesn’t fit, try another.”

Try this out and this might be a good entry point into the books/works of Kevin.

[Gijs Limonard · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a great collection of aphorisms by the well known tech-savvy author. Be sure to check out his magnificent What Technology Wants

Some nuggets:

"A great way to understand yourself is to seriously reflect on everything you find irritating in others."

"When someone tells you something is wrong, they’re usually right. When they tell you how to fix it they’re usually wrong."

"Copying others is a good way to start. Copying yourself is a disappointing way to end."

"Don’t attribute to malice what can be explained by incompetence."

"The greatest killer of happiness is comparison. If you must compare, compare yourself to you yesterday."

"Aim to die broke. Give to your beneficiaries before you die; it’s more fun and useful to them. Spend it all. Your last check should go to the funeral home and it should bounce."

[Anton · Rating 5 out of 5]

A short but remarkable read! It would make a perfect go-to present idea. Full of practical wisdom and generosity of spirit.

Related reads:
- The Bed of Procrustes: Philosophical and Practical Aphorisms
- Maxims and Reflections
- The Art of Worldly Wisdom: A Pocket Oracle

[Ali · Rating 5 out of 5]

quick read. good advice.

ps>skimming thru before returning to the library read much better. appreciating it more when it sinks in.

[Graeme Newell · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a wonderfully simple book, a long series of one-line pearls of wisdom. Kelly doesn't bombard you with overly complex theories or jargon. Instead, he offers straightforward advice on a wide range of topics, from career choices to relationships and personal development. It's easy to grasp and apply, making it accessible to most everyone.

I particularly appreciated the sections on time management and productivity. Kelly's emphasis on setting priorities and focusing on what truly matters is sound advice. Loved his tips on reducing distractions and making the most of our time.

Also loved the book's emphasis on curiosity and lifelong learning. Kelly encourages us all to stay curious and embrace new experiences, which is a refreshing reminder in a world that often prioritizes routine and comfort over growth.

If you're looking for some straightforward guidance on how to lead a better life, it's worth a read.

[Samcwright · Rating 5 out of 5]

The older I get, the more I appreciate simple bits of wisdom passed down through the centuries. This book contains many lifetimes worth of insights and guidance. You would save significant time if you simply applied much of the advice from this book.

- “be quick to give credit and to take criticism.”
- “the reward for good work is more work.”
- “the best way to get a correct answer on the internet is to post an obviously wrong answer and wait for someone to correct you.”

[Eric Lai · Rating 4 out of 5]

This read like a compilation of a self-help guru's email newsletter (looking at you, James Clear), but I'm not mad about it

[Pamela Sweezy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had this shelved in “abandoned” for a while but decided to circle back to it and finish the thang. I’m giving it a 3 because the advice is valid. But I’m not going higher than that because there were no (or few) explanations as to why it’s good advice. It would probably be more beneficial if I read it as a 20 year old rather than a 50 year old. It might make a nice high school graduation gift because it is packed with hard-earned wisdom. I rarely take advice though so, even if I had this as a young adult, I’d probably still make the same mistakes. 😆

[Torul · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very readable .A sweet collection of everyday advice . The kind of book you should highlight when you read, to be able to go back to .

[Raghav Sharma · Rating 5 out of 5]

Short, sweet and mostly true

[Elvinas Predkelis · Rating 5 out of 5]

A book worth owning and coming back to every now and again.

It strikes the perfect balance between promoting the warm nature of a human while advocating a stern grip on one's life.

[micah · Rating 5 out of 5]

deeply enjoyed this book, easy to read - great to pickup.. and just loaded with amazing advice around many areas of life.

[Lori · Rating 4 out of 5]

A worthwhile collection of pithy ideas,clever maxims, and sound advice all collected in one place.fun

[FeLegia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Alcuni lampi di genio, altri mediocri, ma nel complesso una lettura agile e fresca, ideale per accompagnare la chiusura dell’anno con una giusta dose di leggerezza.

[Marc · Rating 1 out of 5]

I bought this book based on a recommendation from a trusted source. That source is no longer trusted. This “book” is a random collection of comments that are superficial, common knowledge, and almost never framed in a unique manner. They lack insight, organization, or meaningful wisdom, and my biggest takeaway is that some authors—like Kevin Kelly—are simply current-day con artists. His only context is two brief paragraphs trying to justify a money-grab before launching into 200 pages of 1-2 “modern proverbs” per page. An entire page stating “Promptness is a sign of respect” or “Art before laundry” is a waste of resources.

His “wisdom” is almost always simplistic, is both repetitive and contradictory, and rarely leads to true a-ha moments. This is at best a website, where the reader might find a good idea versus feeling ripped-off for spending $26 (!!!) for something that took no effort and could be thrown together in a couple of days.

I would never purchase anything by this “author” again and am skeptical of any books suggested by Recomendo. I can see why Kelly counsels his readers “Choose not to be outraged today.” Otherwise they’d be furious about wasting their money on this garbage.

[Jin · Rating 3 out of 5]

I‘m disappointed. I had high expectations due to all the ravishing reviews but it‘s just a Collection of simple advices which are neither sorted nor extraordinary. I wouldn‘t say that the advices are bad per se but most of them were not new. Maybe it makes sense to read them when you are 20 something or younger.
The layout is also too mundane to present it as a gift. It would be better to read these advices in a daily calendar format and not as a book.

[Denis Vasilev · Rating 5 out of 5]

Шикарная книга советов от Кевина Келли. Все по делу и глубоко

[Patrick · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quick read full of pithy quotes originally meant for the author's children as they left the house. The advice ranged from the optimal size of a back patio to be utilized, to overarching life purpose advice. Will keep on the table to revisit often.

[Relyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

The title says it all. This really was crammed full of excellent advice for living. So, if you like this kind of book - this is a great one.

[Lee Kuiper · Rating 5 out of 5]

The last time I felt like I read a book this densely distilled and worthy of taking one page at a time was New Seeds of Contemplation by Thomas Merton. Honestly, it’s hard to fathom how much wisdom is distilled into this book. Truly incredible.

To the unacquainted it might be easy to scoff at a book titled Excellent Advice for Living. Having read all of Kevin Kelly’s previous books (and having read his 68 unsolicited bits of advice on his 68th birthday) I knew this book was going to be gold. Thankfully, the book more than lives up to its title.

If you really want to get the most from it then it’s best to read it very, very slowly. Each page has only one, two, or three little snippets of advice. Yet, you’d be hard pressed to go more than a couple pages without finding some truly excellent advice that necessitates stopping to ponder and really ingest. I was honestly annoyed (in the best way possible) with how often I was circling and underlining excerpts. It would have been easier to circle/underline the bits that didn’t make me stop and think.

Excellent Advice for Living is both extremely easy to take in and also a whole lot to take in. Reading it all at once would be like trying to drink from a firehose.

Now, if firehoses are your type of thing…or you don’t have time to read only a little bit at a time this book is a top candidate for re-reading at routine (annual?) intervals. It feels like a great place to revisit. Having read a lot of these tidbits back in 2020 it was both a refreshing reminder and insightfully eye-opening to read the expanded book version in 2023. I intend to pull this book out every January 1st and savor the succinct and sagacious morsels.

If being a human had prerequisite reading this would certainly be on the list.

[Keith Martin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Five stars for the value of the accumulated wisdom contained here. Minus one star for not providing any attribution, even for well-known nuggets like Maslow’s Law, and minus one star for not providing any organization or index.

[Kim · Rating 4 out of 5]

The ideal way to consume this book is to read it slowly just after you conclude your day. There are nuggets of knowlegde that made me think, reflect and sometimes disagree.

[Angel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent read chock full of concise bits of advice. This is a book worth having a hard copy lying around in order to open up and randomly read sections again and again.

[Synthia Salomon · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love to end a month with a lil self help!
Dodge common pitfalls on the path to a better life.

Bits I’m going to try going forward:

1. Talk less than you feel tempted to. That’s usually the right amount. 

When you do speak, make sure that what you say checks three criteria: it’s true, necessary, and kind. Life will become lighter if you prioritize being considerate over being correct in your conversations with others.

2. one of the best things you can do for your children is to prioritize your relationship with your partner. As the leaders of your family, the love and respect you show for each other provides a powerful model and fosters an atmosphere of psychological safety. Both are tremendously influential. 

Equally counterintuitive – and critical – for psychological safety are rules. Kids actually crave clearly defined boundaries. A few explicit statements framed as “Our family has a rule for XYZ” can be worth their weight in gold. 

[Kimberly · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is exactly what it says. It's advice for living. I absolutely loved it and here are some of my favorites.
-"A vacation plus a disaster equals an adventure."
-"people only remember what kind of person you were while you were achieving, not necessarily what you achieved."
-" it is not a compliment if it comes with a request. "
- "You are what you do, not what you say. "
- "that thing that made you weird as a kid can make you great as an adult if you don't lose it."
-"Master one thing, you will find your bliss."
-"The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing."
-"If you are not embarrassed by your past self, you've probably not grown up yet."
-"Don't let someone else's urgency become your emergency. "
-"Don't keep making the same mistakes. Try to make new mistakes."
-"learn how to be alone without being lonely."
-"what you do instead of work might become your real work."
-"A wise man said before you speak, let tour words pass through 3 gates. At the 1st gate, ask yourself; is it true? At the 2nd gate, ask, is it necessary? At the 3rd gate, ask, is it kind?"