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This is Where I Leave You

3.88  ·  Rating details ·  136,427 ratings  ·  12,169 reviews
A riotously funny, emotionally raw novel about love, marriage, divorce, family, and the ties that bind—whether we like it or not.

The death of Judd Foxman’s father marks the first time that the entire Foxman family—including Judd’s mother, brothers, and sister—have been together in years. Conspicuously absent: Judd’s wife, Jen, whose fourteen-month affair with Judd’s radio-
Hardcover, 339 pages
Published August 6th 2009 by Orion (first published November 10th 2003)
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Mary Hogan This is one of the few times I saw the movie BEFORE reading the book. Wish I hadn't. The movie was funny and sweet, but the book had the depth and hea…moreThis is one of the few times I saw the movie BEFORE reading the book. Wish I hadn't. The movie was funny and sweet, but the book had the depth and heart that so many movies miss. Book is definitely better. Don't think this is a spoiler to say that the BOOK scene where Judd walks in on his wife was so heartbreakingly funny I reread it over and over.(less)
Mark Treble Pathos, pure and simple. There are lighter moments and there are funny scenes. The book, though, is best read as pathos.

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Average rating 3.88  · 
Rating details
 ·  136,427 ratings  ·  12,169 reviews

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Sep 16, 2009 rated it it was ok
I picked up this book on the recommendation of an acquaintance whose taste I trust. And in reading the dust jacket flap, I was immediately drawn in by the idea of the book: a family -- four siblings -- mourning the death of their father, coming together for seven days to sit shiva. The book promised to be witty and biting, an unforgiving look at family dynamic. I'm in. Sign me up.


For sure there was some great language in here. Some sharp observations about disappointment and growing up and lo
Jun 22, 2010 rated it it was ok
A grating combination of trying too hard to be funny, casual misogyny, and generally unsympathetic characters. Tropper also seems completely obsessed with judging the physiognomy and physiques of all of the characters, including minor ones that just show up to sit shiva or whatever. Heaven forbid that you grow old and expose any skin, or wear low-riding jeans postpartum. Everyone is physically icky except for the shining goddess of a wife who cheated on him, and all the women about whom he makes ...more
Nov 10, 2009 rated it it was ok

Voice Over: Judd Foxman had the perfect job...

(on-air antics at the radio station; his boss makes a sexist joke)

VO: the perfect girl...

(hot young starlet (Jessica Biel?) smiles at camera)

VO: The perfect life... Until one day, it left him behind.

(smiling, Judd carries an ornate birthday cake into a bedroom. "Surprise, honey! Happy birthday!" Flash cut: Biel in bed, looking over a man's shoulder. "Judd!" The man turns, and it's Judd's boss. "Foxman! How's it hanging?" Back to Judd, who flings the
Dec 08, 2013 rated it did not like it
Defines a new genre: "dick lit." A few moments of profound human interactions amid a sea of objectifying comments about women. Not a single female character passes by the author without some mention of her attractiveness or lack of as a sole criterion of her worth. Despicable. ...more
Shelby *trains flying monkeys*
Jun 19, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Recommended to Shelby *trains flying monkeys* by: Kelly (and the Book Boar) and Snotchocheez

I got book pushed into reading this book. Kelly and Snotchocheez both rated this book highly and I usually somewhat agree with them on books so I requested this sucker from the library.

And..I loved it.

How to get a five star review from this hateful reader? Characters that are so real that I expect them to drive up my driveway. Characters that have no filter on their mouths or their thoughts. A fucked up family that makes mine not look as bad.

I'm not going to tell you what the book is a
Jul 20, 2010 rated it really liked it
Does this story sound like it’d tickle your funny bone? Judd Foxman and his wife Jen lost a baby during the last months of her pregnancy. A year later, he catches her in bed with his boss, a crude radio shock-jock. Months after that, Judd doesn’t have a job and is living in a crappy apartment when he gets the news that his father finally died after long battle with cancer. Just then, Jen drops by to let him know that she’s pregnant. Judd’s even more shocked to learn that his father’s last reques ...more
Apr 05, 2011 rated it it was ok
Shelves: reviewed, 2011, for-kindle
This book is weak. I’m not usually a fan of novels that think they can hold their own merit on nothing but shock value and really bad sexual innuendos—I’m pretty sure this book may have overestimated itself. I’d even feel bad for it, but the fact that its shallow cliché-ness seems to beg for a Hollywood deal rather sucks up any pity I might have otherwise had.
Crystal Craig

I started This is Where I Leave You yesterday afternoon after picking up all four books I currently have on the go and hardly getting through a page before tossing them aside frustrated. I'm not in a rut, really, I'm not. I want to read, but nothing was grabbing my attention. Friends tried to help, asking me what I was in the mood for. Honestly, I had no clue. I have a list of books I want to finish by the end of this year, but that doesn't mean anything if I'm not in the mood. A Sudden Ligh
Jan 12, 2015 rated it really liked it
Shelves: own
Judd Foxwell is a broken, damaged man. He has found his wife cheating on him with his boss and then he gets the call his terminally ill father has passed away. His dying wish: to have his family - non practicing Jews - sit shiva for 7 days as final tribute to him in death. Except the 7 days are more like a forced quarantine for Judd and his 4 siblings. What ensues is a hot mess of grudges as wounds are reopened but as part of that process, they are finally given a chance to heal. This is a story ...more
Nov 26, 2015 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
“You never know when it will be the last time you’ll see your father, or kiss your wife, or play with your little brother, but there’s always a last time. If you could remember every last time, you’d never stop grieving.”

Jonathan Tropper and Nick Hornby are two authors that seem to be on the same plane although from two different parts of the world. Sarcasm and dark humor are their specialty, and a few movie adaptations have followed in the wake of their novels. Sadly, even at the adamant ur
Jul 13, 2018 rated it really liked it
This was a recommendation from Sarah of Sarah's Bookshelves blog and I loved it! If you enjoy funny and irreverent books about dysfunctional characters, this is the book for you. The death of the family patriarch brings together the Foxman family for seven days to sit shiva, their father’s last request. The enforced togetherness brings all the dysfunction to the forefront. What ensues is a mixture of hilarity with moments of poignancy.

Highly recommended!
Meh. This book was fine, but it wasn't good. My main problem is that there seemed to be a lot of anger at and objectifying of women on the part of the main character, Judd Foxman. There was a lot of talking about women (both young and old) as body parts (though to be fair, this happened a lot with the descriptions of men too) and as vehicles for Judd's fantasies. I get it that his wife cheated on him, but still I didn't like this part of the narrative. Maybe I just wasn't supposed to like Judd a ...more
One of the funniest novels I read last year. Jonathan Tropper has such an amazing, razor-sharp wit. I couldn't stop laughing, and there were a few unexpected moments where I got a little choked-up. A wonderful balance of humor and heart. The movie was just so-so. The book is so much better! I love Judd and his crazy, opinionated, and unapologetic family. They tell it like it is and then some. A must-read. :) Enjoy! ...more

-Probably one of the most effective combinations of heartbreaking and hilarious I've ever read.

-Something about it is cinematic, and almost begs to be turned into a movie (one that won't be as good as the book, of course), and subsequently a few of the plot points feel just very slightly bordering on cliché.

-It took me most of the book before I began to realize that, due to the narrator's state of depression, he's a bit hard to like. But at the same time, it's his wry observations that make the
"Seven days?"

"That's how long it takes to sit shiva."

"We're not really going to do this, are we?"

You have my deepest sympathies. I don't want to spend seven days with people I like much less spend them with my family.

Well, a dying wish is a dying wish, and when patriarch Mort Foxman requests that his family sit shiva, well, DAMMIT!, they'd better do it. So, Judd, the narrator, moves back to the old homestead for seven days of communing with his three siblings and a whole lot of ghosts-of-not-so-
Sep 04, 2009 rated it it was amazing
Being married to Jonathan Tropper could scare a woman to death. This man knows women, their thoughts, what motivates them, their foibles, their intellects. He can put it all out there, too. Besides, he's a very sexy writer--he knows men, too, especially the side of them that has that morning wood thing going on all day, every day. But Tropper is not out for anything other than to spin a really great yarn about a family of grown children who haven't really gotten along very well for most of their ...more
Skyler Autumn
Sep 06, 2018 rated it it was ok
2 Stars

This book was not as satisfying as I hoped it would be. This is Where I Leave You, is a book about a family of estranged and extremely fucked up individuals that come together to sit Shiva when their emotionally distant father passes away after his long battle with cancer. Our vessel into this world and family is Judd Foxman the middle child of four siblings and recently single after finding his wife of nine years having sex with his chauvinistic boss. A book I thought would be about ac
Jonathan Ashleigh
Oct 07, 2014 rated it it was amazing
I really enjoyed this book and even a poorly-made movie can't bring it down. The characters felt like people I knew and I sometimes wondered what they were doing when I wasn't reading. The style and flow of this book worked very well and I have recommended it to many people. ...more
Jul 27, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: library-penrith
What a gem of a book. I am so happy I stumbled across this book in my library, literally just looked up while sneaking glances at the shelves over my little boy's shoulders at library story time. Recognised the title and picked it up straight away. This story follows the Foxman family while they complete the seven day period of mourning and are observing Shiva after the death of their father, Mort. The story is told from son Judd's point of view, and his fathers' death could not have happened at ...more
Kelly (and the Book Boar)
Find all of my reviews at:

I ran through Tropper’s books in short order quite a few years ago. Then this one was set to become a movie so I read it again. In what could only be called an end of days scenario, me (the not-a-re-reader) found myself in a situation a couple of days before Christmas . . . . .

Rendering me pretty much not only housebound, but restricted to the room closest to the bathroom. And despite having a plethora of books on the Kindle, I did
Dec 05, 2010 rated it it was ok
Three stars feels a little generous because though the premise is promising (sitting shiva for their father, dysfuctional family must Learn to Get Along or Not) and it sailed along lightly (I could practically see the movie in my mind) the great big giant dollop of misogyny heaped on top really turned my stomach. Judd's constant snipes at women and their weight problems and their hotness quotient and typical male writers crap about the drag of being slave to their sex drive and the drag of being ...more
Angela M
Nov 03, 2014 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition

3.5 stars if I could but rounded up to 4 because it really made me laugh .

This book is very funny a lot of the time and it's sometimes sad , sometimes irreverent and borderline obscene at times but this book is always entertaining . If profanity bothers you, I'd say maybe you should skip it .

This is the story of a totally dysfunctional family coming together to sit shiva for their father. During these seven days we learn about their past and their present problems and some of the dialog is reall
Sep 19, 2010 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: favorites
Five. Five. Five.

Fifty pages in and Tropper had declared himself one of my favorite authors. I will be reading more of his work ASAP.

Two words - Fucking hilarious.

Sex, Drugs, Love, abundance. Love it.

I can't decide which I was drawn to more, Tropper's sarcastic wit or the not-so-subtle family dysfunction. I loved the idea of the four siblings and the erratic mother coming together to mourn the death of their father/husband. I fell in love with each of the siblings at some point or ano
Elyse  Walters
Aug 06, 2010 rated it it was amazing
When I was comparing books with another new Goodreads friend --
an realized I had never wrote a review of this book --
I only laughed...
"How silly of me"...

Because this is my favorite 'GO TO' book--(read sections out loud), for comic-tragedy --- I especially enjoy sharing this with my Jewish friends with a great sense of humor -- a great sense of family--

Its also for 'everyone' who needs a break from 'heavy' reading --
This book makes you laugh (for real) --
This book is sad (for read) --
This book i
Dec 30, 2009 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: blog
Judd Foxman had a content but not always perfect marriage to the woman of his dreams. And then, I guess because Life just enjoys being an asshole, Life knocks Judd down. Judd and his wife lose their first baby, which causes Judd to lose his wife to his boss, which causes Judd to lose his job. And, because Life in this book likes to remorselessly kick people while they're down, Judd loses his father to cancer. And just when you think things can't get any worse, Judd finds out that his atheist fat ...more
Jul 25, 2011 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This was the first Jonathan Tropper book I read and I'm so glad I decided to pick it up. I work in a bookstore and this book kept catching my eye because of the simplicity of the design. Anyway, our main character is home to mourn the death of his father. Meanwhile, his personal life is falling to pieces. His family is like one big sitcom with twisting stories that most of us can only imagine. By the time I reached the end of the book, I was praying that there were more pages that had just falle ...more
Jr Bacdayan
May 03, 2015 rated it really liked it

I’ve often wondered how it feels like to be divorced. Not that I wanna be, mind you. All I’m thinking about is how two people who share love and have great chemistry can ruin something so beautiful. Remember Katy Perry and Russell Brand? I mean those two both got long black hair and they are both into pop I think that’s destiny right there like how crazy is it that they’re now divorced. There’s also Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries, their names both start with the letter K and they both look li
Another un-put-down-able winner by Tropper. This book hijacked me: it grabbed me and held on to me and made me lose sleep (how can I turn off the light NOW? I MUST read on!).

Tropper writes about a family who spends seven long days together “sitting shiva”—a Jewish ceremony for mourning a death in the family. When I read the blurb, I was afraid. Would it be full of Yiddish words I don’t know and don’t want to know? Would it reek of religious speeches and boring ceremonies? I found out immediately
Feb 07, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: on-my-bookshelf
I knew immediately I was going to love this book, right from the first few pages I was laughing and reading aloud passages and making my partner who’s not a reader laugh along with me. It was that kind of book. Comedy mixed with the right amount of dysfunction and family drama. Plenty of adults acting childish and immature but really isn’t that what happens when we are forced to spend extended time with our siblings? I was having such a great time with this book, I forgot about real life and I w ...more
This book made me think... if I were a character in a generic pseudo-indie dramedy what all would happen?

I'm thinking I would be a slightly bitter divorcee who chain smokes and uses scathing sarcasm as a defense mechanism. Coming home would unleash a fury of hilarious down home characters who would be surprised at my current state of bitchiness but would still embrace me, slowly chipping away at my hard exterior until my slightly warmer (still bitchy) interior is exposed. Maybe my ex-husband wou
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Jonathan Tropper is the author of Everything Changes, The Book of Joe , which was a Booksense selection, and Plan B. He lives with his wife, Elizabeth, and their children in Westchester, New York, where he teaches writing at Manhattanville College. How To Talk To A Widower was optioned by Paramount Pictures, and Everything Changes and The Book of Joe are also in development as feature films.


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