The Cafetière Who Wanted To Be A Porn Star
Once upon a time, there was a little cafetière. He spent most of the day sitting quietly in a cupboard, but every morning he got put on the stove. This was when he acted out his fantasies.
"Oh yeah baby, oh yeah!" he moaned as he came to the boil. "Oh yeah! Oh yeah! COFFEE'S READY!!"
"You know you love it," he leered at the cup, as his owner poured out his steaming contents.
"You're disgusting," said the cup.
Most of the other inhabitants of the kitchen sided with the cup, but the kettle liked to encourage him.
"Live your dream man, live your dream," he said.
"You're disgusting too," said the pot. "And you're black."
"I motherfuckin' am," agreed the kettle cheerfully. "And you ain't no pureblooded Aryan yourself."
Stung to the quick, the pot could do no more than sputter and bubble a little. She tried to burn the coq au vin, but the gas wasn't high enough.
[To be continued]