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The Golden Thread (2021 edition): A true story of Fear, Forgiveness & Faith
HONEST, INSPIRING, THOUGHT PROVOKING:
Our lives are like a complex tapestry, with many threads weaving each of our unique and individual pictures. There is, however, one thing that we all have in common, one thread. The GOLDEN THREAD is God’s thread in our lives. It is always there, even when we feel that it isn’t. Just turn your tapestry over and you will see it continuing on the back. Always there! The GOLDEN THREAD.
This book is the true story of one man’s GOLDEN THREAD in his life. Brendan Conboy grew up in fear and confusion, struggling with many personal issues. These experiences formed a foundation that could have ended in disaster but instead became the motivator to want to make a positive difference. Brendan has experienced miracles, real miracles. He has walked through the valley of depression and death more than once, but emerged stronger on the other side. For almost 30 years he has been full of vision and passion to help young people. That’s why he became a youth worker and one of the most important lessons that he has learnt on his journey is that we need to share our knowledge and skill with others.
Extract from Chapter One: So let’s ‘start at the very beginning’. It is a good place to start. I now understand that the first eight years of any child’s life are the most impressionable and the most influential. Any amount of trauma can leave deep long-lasting effects. Our earliest memories form a foundation for our development. Positive memories and experiences will in most cases result in a positive development for a child. Whereas, a negative and traumatic memory could lead to disaster and, almost certainly, some level of help will be required to understand the confusing feelings that will be experienced later in life.
My earliest memory was one of my dad returning from the pub on a Sunday at about three in the afternoon. Mum had kept his Sunday roast warm in the oven (no such thing as microwaves then) but it had been so long it had dried up and was not fit for consumption. I’m not sure if I had reached my fourth birthday but I clearly remember my dad’s drunken anger. He was so angry that he threw the plate and contents at the lounge window, smashing the large centre pane, with the plate landing in the front garden. I don’t remember what happened next but I do remember the feeling of fear. That feeling would remain with me for at least the next ten years which is how long it would take before my dad admitted that he had a drink problem.
The power of any addiction can be all-consuming and alcoholism slowly and gradually took over my dad’s life. At times I will say that I didn’t really have a childhood and that my childhood started when I was fifteen years old when my dad stopped drinking. In fact, I did play childhood games but the big change was realising that my now constantly sober dad loved me. He had always loved me but the power of alcohol with associated anger and aggression had built up so much fear in me that I couldn’t see any love.
Our lives are like a complex tapestry, with many threads weaving each of our unique and individual pictures. There is, however, one thing that we all have in common, one thread. The GOLDEN THREAD is God’s thread in our lives. It is always there, even when we feel that it isn’t. Just turn your tapestry over and you will see it continuing on the back. Always there! The GOLDEN THREAD.
This book is the true story of one man’s GOLDEN THREAD in his life. Brendan Conboy grew up in fear and confusion, struggling with many personal issues. These experiences formed a foundation that could have ended in disaster but instead became the motivator to want to make a positive difference. Brendan has experienced miracles, real miracles. He has walked through the valley of depression and death more than once, but emerged stronger on the other side. For almost 30 years he has been full of vision and passion to help young people. That’s why he became a youth worker and one of the most important lessons that he has learnt on his journey is that we need to share our knowledge and skill with others.
Extract from Chapter One: So let’s ‘start at the very beginning’. It is a good place to start. I now understand that the first eight years of any child’s life are the most impressionable and the most influential. Any amount of trauma can leave deep long-lasting effects. Our earliest memories form a foundation for our development. Positive memories and experiences will in most cases result in a positive development for a child. Whereas, a negative and traumatic memory could lead to disaster and, almost certainly, some level of help will be required to understand the confusing feelings that will be experienced later in life.
My earliest memory was one of my dad returning from the pub on a Sunday at about three in the afternoon. Mum had kept his Sunday roast warm in the oven (no such thing as microwaves then) but it had been so long it had dried up and was not fit for consumption. I’m not sure if I had reached my fourth birthday but I clearly remember my dad’s drunken anger. He was so angry that he threw the plate and contents at the lounge window, smashing the large centre pane, with the plate landing in the front garden. I don’t remember what happened next but I do remember the feeling of fear. That feeling would remain with me for at least the next ten years which is how long it would take before my dad admitted that he had a drink problem.
The power of any addiction can be all-consuming and alcoholism slowly and gradually took over my dad’s life. At times I will say that I didn’t really have a childhood and that my childhood started when I was fifteen years old when my dad stopped drinking. In fact, I did play childhood games but the big change was realising that my now constantly sober dad loved me. He had always loved me but the power of alcohol with associated anger and aggression had built up so much fear in me that I couldn’t see any love.
326 pages, Paperback
First published September 4, 2015
4 people want to read
About the author
Brendan Conboy
33 books13 followersMy biography is one of my published books. It's called THE GOLDEN THREAD. So, I will use this place to tell you why I write.
I left school without an English qualification. Unable to string two sentences together. It’s fair to say that I hated writing. I couldn’t see the point. I couldn’t see the beauty. The beauty that lies in words. And the power. Words are so powerful. They can bring about change. They influence. But how did I change?
Ten years after leaving school I read about Jesus. Not for the first time, but the words that I read came alive. This man Jesus felt real. So, I stepped into a relationship with Him. He came into my life and transformed my mind.
Within a year I was writing rap songs, songs with a message. The words would just fall into my head. Sometimes in bed or just walking the dog. Like a blockage had been removed.
The cover of each of my books, tell you that I am the author of the work. However, that is not strictly true. All of the words written are inspired and given to me by God. I see myself simply as a conduit, a messenger and His instrument to be used.
Though I nearly didn’t start writing books at all…
My mother died in 2011 and when we were sorting through her possessions, we found the start of a story that she had been writing. It was her life story. She hadn’t written very much at all, but it was enough to inspire me to do the same, but I didn’t.
Two years later I was still procrastinating about it. So, in 2013 I happened to mention in passing to a friend that I was thinking of writing a book. I suppose deep down I was seeking some encouragement, but that is not what I received. Instead my friend said, “You could never be an Author. An Author writes 3,600 words an hour. You could never do that, so you could never be an Author.”
I thought to myself, “He’s right, I could never be an Author.”
It was like a curse, a mental blockage. I don’t know if that was my friends intention, but that is what happened. Though, something kept gnawing away at me. My mother was inspiring me, fighting back against the curse.
It took another two years, but in 2015, I eventually published my first book, my biography. I called it The Golden Thread, but you will have to read the book to find out why. I had published a book, but still I struggled to call myself an Author and so my writing stopped, with the exception of the odd poem or two.
Then in July 2018 I was sat in a large Christian festival, with thousands of people around me. I had been waiting for a kidney transplant for two and a half years and I was angry with God. In the midst of the crowded room and drowned out by the sound, I cried out to God. “What am I supposed to be doing with my life, I feel rejected, discarded and worthless.”
Then I felt God speak back to me, it was so clear, “Brendan, I haven’t finished with you yet. You still have tools and skills that I want you to use, so use them.” Later on at the same festival someone prayed for me and I had confirmation. God was telling me to write. This was the skill and tools that He wanted me to use.
I returned home determined to write. I had planned to write a teen fiction novel of some sort. First though, I had gathered a small pile of teen fiction books to read. I had the idea that these would inspire me, but as I chose the first book, God spoke to me again. “Brendan, you don’t need to read these books. You have the tools and skills and I want you to use them.”
Then the words of my friend returned to me, “You could never be an Author… have to write 3,600 words an hour… you can’t do that.”
Was that right? Did I believe that? I decided to find out for myself and asked Google. I was rather shocked and surprised to read that most authors will write about 1,000 words a day and Stephen King, an amazing author, will write 2,000. I decided that 1,000 words was easily achievable. I also then realised, all tho
I left school without an English qualification. Unable to string two sentences together. It’s fair to say that I hated writing. I couldn’t see the point. I couldn’t see the beauty. The beauty that lies in words. And the power. Words are so powerful. They can bring about change. They influence. But how did I change?
Ten years after leaving school I read about Jesus. Not for the first time, but the words that I read came alive. This man Jesus felt real. So, I stepped into a relationship with Him. He came into my life and transformed my mind.
Within a year I was writing rap songs, songs with a message. The words would just fall into my head. Sometimes in bed or just walking the dog. Like a blockage had been removed.
The cover of each of my books, tell you that I am the author of the work. However, that is not strictly true. All of the words written are inspired and given to me by God. I see myself simply as a conduit, a messenger and His instrument to be used.
Though I nearly didn’t start writing books at all…
My mother died in 2011 and when we were sorting through her possessions, we found the start of a story that she had been writing. It was her life story. She hadn’t written very much at all, but it was enough to inspire me to do the same, but I didn’t.
Two years later I was still procrastinating about it. So, in 2013 I happened to mention in passing to a friend that I was thinking of writing a book. I suppose deep down I was seeking some encouragement, but that is not what I received. Instead my friend said, “You could never be an Author. An Author writes 3,600 words an hour. You could never do that, so you could never be an Author.”
I thought to myself, “He’s right, I could never be an Author.”
It was like a curse, a mental blockage. I don’t know if that was my friends intention, but that is what happened. Though, something kept gnawing away at me. My mother was inspiring me, fighting back against the curse.
It took another two years, but in 2015, I eventually published my first book, my biography. I called it The Golden Thread, but you will have to read the book to find out why. I had published a book, but still I struggled to call myself an Author and so my writing stopped, with the exception of the odd poem or two.
Then in July 2018 I was sat in a large Christian festival, with thousands of people around me. I had been waiting for a kidney transplant for two and a half years and I was angry with God. In the midst of the crowded room and drowned out by the sound, I cried out to God. “What am I supposed to be doing with my life, I feel rejected, discarded and worthless.”
Then I felt God speak back to me, it was so clear, “Brendan, I haven’t finished with you yet. You still have tools and skills that I want you to use, so use them.” Later on at the same festival someone prayed for me and I had confirmation. God was telling me to write. This was the skill and tools that He wanted me to use.
I returned home determined to write. I had planned to write a teen fiction novel of some sort. First though, I had gathered a small pile of teen fiction books to read. I had the idea that these would inspire me, but as I chose the first book, God spoke to me again. “Brendan, you don’t need to read these books. You have the tools and skills and I want you to use them.”
Then the words of my friend returned to me, “You could never be an Author… have to write 3,600 words an hour… you can’t do that.”
Was that right? Did I believe that? I decided to find out for myself and asked Google. I was rather shocked and surprised to read that most authors will write about 1,000 words a day and Stephen King, an amazing author, will write 2,000. I decided that 1,000 words was easily achievable. I also then realised, all tho
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