Real Life: Preparing for the 7 Most Challenging Days of Your Life

by Phillip C. McGraw

What if you could see around the corners of your life? Wouldn't it help to know what the most challenging days of your life would be like BEFORE they hit?

There are certain days in life that stand out because they are among the toughest that you or someone you love will experience. Your quality of life and your experience on the journey through this world are a function of how you handle these days when they arrive. Will you be ready? Will you be strong? Will you survive and be better for it, or will you cave?

In Real Life: Preparing for the 7 Most Challenging Days of Your Life, bestselling author and talk show host Dr. Phil McGraw is here to help you prepare to confront what he believes are the seven most common critical days that you or a loved one are likely to face. This book helps make it possible for you to be there for yourself or to be the calm in the middle of the storm for someone you love when any of these difficult days arrive.

Loss -- the day that you or someone you love has their heart shattered by death, divorce, or losing something of great value. Fear -- the day that you realize you have lived your life as a sellout and that every choice you have made up until this point was dictated by other people's expectations, not based on your own goals and desires. Adaptability Breakdown -- the day that the pressures of balancing your responsibilities and needs, along with life's demands, have become way too overwhelming, and you realize that you are in way over your head. Physical Health -- the day that your body or that of someone you love breaks down because of illness, trauma, or disease. Mental Health -- the day that the mind breaks down and betrays you or someone you love. Addiction -- the day that addiction takes over, and you or your loved one look a powerful destroyer in the face and realize that you are not in control. Existential Crisis -- the day that you or someone you love lose the purpose, compass, and connection to meaning in life and have no answer to the question "Why?"

Encountering these days can feel like hitting a brick wall. But while they will change your life, they do not have to ruin it. Dr. Phil's step-by-step plan for getting through the worst days is designed to help you feel prepared when it really matters -- in the midst of a crisis. Dr. Phil provides wisdom and resources that will guide you toward a solution that is right for you, showing you how to minimize disruption and maximize the recovery.

This book is not just about giving you a crisis-mode plan. It will also show you how to change your life now, before you get into a crisis, so that you are not behind the power curve when any of the seven days hit. You will be able to be a leader to someone you love during their crisis because you will know what to do. Dr. Phil says there are no exceptions: with the right attitude and the right information, every challenging day can be turned into a valuable life experience.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Psychology, Reference, Counselling

336 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2008

About the author

Phillip Calvin McGraw, best known as Dr. Phil, is an American television personality, psychologist and author who is the host of the psychology themed television show Dr. Phil. He gained celebrity status following appearances on The Oprah Winfrey Show.

Reviews

[Jeff · Rating 2 out of 5]

A painful book to read ... hard work ... facing my nonsense, which is considerable!
~ ~
He's a hard man. Not my cup of tea, but I recognise that he's rendering a service.

I'm more 'tip-toe-through-the-tulips'.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this years ago and really liked it a lot. (Definitely Dr. Phil’s best and most helpful book!)

[سمر درويش · Rating 5 out of 5]

فى العام لم أُعطى الـ 5 نجوم الا كل حين
و لكن سطحية اراء الناس فى الكومنتات المعروضة مع ضخامة كتاب زى كتاب حياة حقيقة جعلنى مُتمسكة باعطاء التقييم كامل
دكتور فيل بالمامه و معلوماته و طريقة عرضه ليسوا بحاجة لتقييمى انا أو غيرى العمل الرائع يُقيم نفسه بنفسه
الكتاب اسمه حياة حقيقة هى فعلا كذلك و لكنها حياة للعقل
منْ من يعى و يُدرك كل هذه المعلومات و يسعى لتطبيقها و لم يصبح ذو عقل مُبهر و حياة رائعة ؟!!
الكتاب ميراث هائل لحياة أفضل
و عند قراءتى لكتاب أدون مُلاحظات و أفكار و أقتبس كلمات و جمل
من روعته و ضخامة فكره وصل بى الحد الى 18 صفحة فلوسكاب تدوين و لم ارضى عن ادائى بعد

حقا عمل رائع لمنْ يعى و لا يأخذ الأمور برؤى سطحية

[Omnia Alsayed · Rating 4 out of 5]

الفكرة بحد ذاتها غريبة .. الاستعداد للايام السبعة الاكثر صعوبة وكارثية في حياتك .. ورغم ان أيامك السبعة قد تكون مختلفة عن تلك التي ذكرها دكتور فيل الا أنك ولابد ستجد أياما متشابهة .. الفقد والموت والخسارة المالية وفقدان المعنى في الحياة ..
من أعظم فوائده علي أكتشافي أني أعاني أزمة وجودية .. بمجرد ان تعرف مشكلتك وأسمها وكونك لست وحدك فيها أنها موجودة منذ الازل .. مع تقديم حلول ممكنة لها .. تجدها تبدأ بالتلاشي ..
كن مستعدا بالكثير من المعلومات .. كن جاهزا بالخطة .. وستتجاوز الايام السبعة .. وستعود للايام الخوالي الطيبة .. كتاب جميل جدا برغم بعض النقاط التي قد تبدو مملة وشديدة التخصص .. احببته ♥

[Dalia · Rating 5 out of 5]

ان السبب فى شعورك بالضياع هو انك انتهكت حرمة حقيقتك الشخصية تلك التى تعبر عما تؤمن به حقا حين لا يكون هناك من يسمع او يرى وانك خنت ذاتك ال ابعد حد ممكن قد تشعر بان حياتك وعاء فارغ لان كل خيار اتخذته خلال هذه السنين لم يكن متسقا مع ماكنت عليه وآمنت به ,فاودى بك الى ما يشبه موتا للحقيقة فى داخلك وهنا تشعر بالفزع فتنظر ذات يوم بالمرآة وتقول
"لقد افسدت حياتى ولا الوم الا نفسى "

[Ahmad Badghaish · Rating 2 out of 5]

كتاب سخيف الصراحة .. قرأت للمؤلف كتابين كانت رائعة, لكن هذا الكتاب ما ناسبني أبداً. الكتاب يتكلم عن 7 أيام مؤثرة في حياتك منها اليوم الذي تفقد فيه عزيز أو يعتريك الخوف وكيف تكون مستعدا لها, بالنسبة لي .. أعتقد بأني مستعد لمثل هذه الأيام قبل قراءة الكتاب ولذلك فضلت عدم إكمال النصف الأخير فيه

[Adam Tellesy · Rating 4 out of 5]

first book (Y) mission complete

[Abdallah Bustami · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well, exactly what you would expect when you read a book written by an expert.
I'm not gonna say that I'm fully prepared now for the 7 most challenging days the author talked about, but I can say that I picked some steps and plans that could help me know where I'm standing and what to do next.
I like how Dr.Phil shares examples of people he knew who have suffered from these rough days just to help you realize how BIG this matter is, and to help you know what's good to do when you're there and what's not.
Of course Dr.Phil, as an expert in the field, makes you feel that he IS talking to you! he's not just writing down some letters to some people, no! he's writing these letters for you!
He makes you feel that you're the one who is being targeted! you're the one he's concerned to help! And that is, indeed, something rare.

[Leah · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a bit of a blast from the past, with pop culture references references from 10+ years ago (hello, Desperate Housewives!), scattered throughout. Listening to Dr. Phil's voice on the audio book was in and of itself a kind of trip back in time for me, as I used to watch his show all the time when I was in college. The book itself is designed to prepare readers for difficult days they likely will experience in the future; in that sense, it's almost as if it's written for a recent high school or college graduate with their whole life ahead of them. I think this book could be useful for people of any age, though, provided they're open to Dr. Phil's unique point of view mixed with a few psychology 101 lessons for good measure.

2019 Reading Challenge Category: A book with "pop," "sugar," or "challenge" in the title.

[BM · Rating 4 out of 5]

There is a lot of good content in this book from beginning to end. Dr. Phil does a good job of detailing the points he wants to get across. The book has a lot of practical advice. My only knock on the book was the section of addiction. It would have been nice if he touched on other common addictions such as gambling, sex, food etc. Instead, he only talked about addictions of drugs or alcohol. Overall, still a solid book and a good recommendation.

[William Schram · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Real Life" offers a way to prepare yourself for the seven most terrible events of your life. It isn't a guarantee that these events will happen to you, but they will probably occur.

Beyond that, there isn't much to say about the book. It does a fine job of drawing you into the advice and leading you from one crisis to another. The problems it covers are general and could happen to anyone. Losing a loved one, finding out your whole life is a lie, losing your moral compass, and more.

[Hager Alkady · Rating 5 out of 5]

من أعظم الكتب التي قرأتها، حقيقةً أعتقد أنه كتابي المفضل حتى الآن فيما مضى كان كتابي المفضل هو كتاب الذكاء العاطفي لدانيال جولمان إلى أن قرأت هذا الكتاب.. دكتور فيل هو أحد الشخصيات الشفافة والتي أحبها على الصعيد الشخصي لذا حين وجدت هذا الكتاب قررت قراءته وأنا أعلم مقدماً أنه لن يكون سيئا، وقد كان حتى أفضل مما ظننت.. أرشحه بشدة

[JENNIFER HATTON · Rating 5 out of 5]

Important read

Good information for oneself and people in your life. Appreciate the references and supplement sites at the end of the book.

[Dorothy Hann · Rating 5 out of 5]

I like this book very much. Plan to keep it for help with challenges in my life.

[Nour Ghandoussi · Rating 1 out of 5]

Nonsense .

[Casey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was exactly what I needed during a rough time. Some of it is common sense, but it doesn't hurt to hear it again.

[Andy Hamm · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this 7 years ago and even if the controversy surrounding Phil’s camps wasn’t big right now, it still wouldn’t have been helpful or memorable.

[Shannon Hoffer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book! Enjoyed reading this, uses real life scenario's, also gives you the tools to adapt to a new mindset on how to view your life.

[Andrea Norton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Real Life ended up on my Top Reads of 2016 shelf. Like everything I've read this year, this isn't something I'd normally read. I am very adaptable and resilient, and I handle crisis situations easily and calmly - and then do the appropriate freak-out when it's over.

There are just some things you can't prepare for in life, and Dr. Phil hits on those situations. The biggest for me was loss - death, ending of friendships, things like that - as I am terrified to lose my parents and still grieving the loss of a friendship.

Dr. Phil walks you through these though situations with, well, real life advice about getting through it and coming out the other side. The advice can be applied to non-crisis situations as well. This is a very good read, and I would recommend it to people who have a hard time with crisis situations or anyone looking to know how to handle something that will inevitably happen in the future.

[Denise Griffin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought it was a good read for someone who has experienced loss or health issues in their life (or other losses too). It may help them to not feel as alone in it or give them a place to relate and feel better about their situation or a past unfortunate time. I could relate to it myself very much and will share excerpts with others as well. He tells it like it is..that life is not all pleasant and can get pretty grilling at times we least expect. Even though it does seem a book to prepare one for before these things happen. However, it can be a good read for anyone who has already had unfortunate happenings in their lives too. Sometimes it can be a matter of changing our perspective as well as doing the footwork or just making small daily strides to get to a better place..or a place that makes us feel better.

[LuAnn · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I started this bnook, I didn't think it was something I needed to read. Then I hit the chapter on Health and realized he was talking to me. I've felt pretty blue after my elbow replacement surgery, but Dr. Phil gave me hope and desire to become more active in the recovery process without being depressed over the loss of some flexibility. Other chapters were also good reminders about dealing with death, stress, fears, and loss. Overall, this was an interesting book, worth spending the time on.

[Dolly · Rating 3 out of 5]

Important to read his head-up advice to know what to expect in various life challenges. An early quote was good preparation: “Take care of you now because you will need all of you then.”
Two more quotes good enough to record: “Crises don’t make heroes, but they do cause people to be more of who they are. What does this crisis reveal about you?” “Research has shown journaling to be the most successful approach to learning how to adapt, probably because it’s a way your mind allows itself to adjust.” Having journaled through many challenges in the past 24 years, I know he is right.

[Aasim Waheed · Rating 4 out of 5]

The only reason I recommend this book is that Dr Phil touches some very-difficult-to-discuss topics and does a good job taking the reader through them. Eg how to deal with the loss of a loved one, what to expect, what to do and how to help other who are in this situation. I say this is the "only reason" because I didn't like the style of the book. After having read Life Strategies by same author, I thought this book wasn't given enough time, and could be summarized to roughly two-third the size; presentation/style could also be improved.

[Rita · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one kejptmy interest. He talks about methods we can use to handle those crises in life that eventually come to all of us. Things like loss of a job, death, divorce. That's as far as Ive gotten so I am sure there is more to it, just don't know what it is yet.
I'm 'reading' the commercial audio version and it's very well done. More than one reader, which I think is part of what helps me stay interested.

[Janet · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really can't stand Dr Phil anymore, he's just too everywhere and too smug. But this book caught my eye on the library shelves and I must say there are some pearls of wisdom in here! Phil is spot on about facing difficulties and then getting back on track so you can enjoy your life to the fullest. A good read for anyone facing trying times of any kind.

[Cathy Mescall · Rating 5 out of 5]

Covers the topics most don't want to talk about and gives great insight as to how you can prepare for what life may or may not give you. Especially loved the chapter on keeping your power and how easily we give it away every day. This chapter has helped myself as well as my daughter in school and sports.

[Rose · Rating 5 out of 5]

I only wish I had read this book a few years ago. This book has something for EVERYONE, we will all face the 7 most challenges that Dr. Phil talks about. I am re-reading several chapters and plan on re-reading them until I know them by heart!

[Carrie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I only read the first few chapters because those were the only ones that interested me. It's typical Dr. Phil style, but he did have some good things to say especially regarding the attitude that you approach life with.

[Rhonda · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love DR. Phil's down o earth, tell it like it is attitude and this book didn't fail to live up to his style unlike his shows have been. I love they way he closed the book off on a positive note. Definitely worth the read!

[Stimple · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well, after all. This is TV's Dr. Phil. While the core is sound, I somewhat tire from the preachy and finger-pointing daddy-knows-best approach to living well. Honestly, if the only thing I have to depend on in life is me for strength and security, then I am in trouble.