علم عشق

by John M. Gottman, هاشم پوریامهر (Translator)

كتاب حاضر، در نوع خود اثر كم‌نظيری درباره روابط عاطفی و زناشویی است. اين كتاب محصول سال‌ها تجربه علمی گروهی است كه رفتارهای زوجين را به طور خلاقانه‌ای صورت‌بندی رياضی كرده‌اند. كتاب شامل ارائه ۴۶ اصل عشق، چهار سوار ويرانگر، پنج دستور‌العمل ايجاد، حفظ و تداوم روابط خوب و انواع پنج‌گانه زوج‌ها پرداخته است. نويسنده كتاب با پشتوانه چهل سال كار و تحليل رفتار زوج‌ها در موقعيت‌های مختلف، به اين نتيجه مهم نايل شده كه وقتی عشق در روابط ميان زوج‌ها جاری می‌شود، بررسی آن به مدد علم امكان‌پذير و روند آن پيش‌بينی‌پذير می‌شود. با روش‌هایی كه در اين كتاب توصيف و تبيين شده، با درصد بالايی از اطمينان ـ حالت‌های مختلف نظير روابط شاد پايدار ـ ناشاد پايدار ـ شاد ناپايدار و ناشاد ناپايدار و وقوع طلاق را می‌شود پيش‌بينی كرد...

Genres: Relationships, Psychology, Nonfiction, Love, Counselling

568 pages, Hardcover

First published October 1, 2014

About the author

Dr. Gottman was one of the Top 10 Most Influential Therapists of the past quarter-century by the Psychotherapy Networker. He is the author or co-author of over 200 published academic articles and more than 40 books, including the bestselling The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work; What Makes Love Last; Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love; The Relationship Cure; Why Marriages Succeed or Fail; and Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child — among many others. Dr. Gottman’s media appearances include Good Morning America, Today, CBS Morning News, and Oprah, as well articles in The New York Times, Ladies Home Journal, Redbook, Glamour, Woman’s Day, People, Self, Reader’s Digest, and Psychology Today.

Co-founder of The Gottman Institute and co-founder of Affective Software, Inc. with his wife, Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, John was also the Executive Director of the Relationship Research Institute. He is Professor Emeritus of Psychology at the University of Washington, where he founded “The Love Lab” at which much of his research on couples’ interactions was conducted.

Reviews

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

You really can apply the scientific method to love and relationships and human happiness.

If you can buy a hard copy of the book then buy it. It is impossible to follow the maths with the endless scrolling of an e-book.. Unless you are very used to maths or you have the working memory of a super-chimpanzee.

It is difficult to know how many stars to give it. I have a feeling that if I pay attention and keep revising my notes it is going to change the course of my whole life.. but never have I read a book in such desperate need of an editor and proofreader. Routledge really let Gottman down.

I definitely want to read more books by Gottman and I'll check out so many of the studies and books he mentioned.

[Johnny · Rating 5 out of 5]

Written by a MIT math grad who turned into psychology after finding himself being more interested in his psychology major roommate's books than his own. The book is a bit heavy with math and equations about relationships and some scientific references. However, it shows some scientific way of seeing how relationships between a man and a woman work. Though the reader may choose to skim through the math works and get to the essence, the observations and experience of a professor and expert who has been doing research on the topic of over 40 decades.
Gottman shows that the longitudinal course of love can be predicted which can effectively prevent relationship disasters. He describes the types of persons and relationship combinations. He shows what are the signs of a good relationship and a bad one.
A lot to be learned, for the single ones, those dating, lovers, and the married couples.