か「」く「」し「」ご「」と「

by Yoru Sumino

きっと誰もが持っている、自分だけの「かくしごと」。みんなには隠している、ちょっとだけ特別なちから。別になんの役にも立たないけれど、そのせいで最近、君のことが気になって仕方ないんだ――。クラスメイト5人の「かくしごと」が照らし出す、お互いへのもどかしい想い。ベストセラー『君の膵臓をたべたい』の著者が贈る、眩しくて時に切ない、共感度 1の青春小説!

Genres: Light Novel, Fiction, Manga, Japanese Literature, Contemporary, Fantasy, Novels

247 pages, Kindle Edition

First published March 22, 2017

About the author

Associated Names:
* Yoru Sumino
* 住野よる (Japanese Profile)
* โยรุ ซูมิโนะ (Thai Profile)

Yoru Sumino (住野よる) is a Japanese writer best known for I Want to Eat Your Pancreas, the novel that became a manga and two films.

Reviews

[Phu · Rating 4 out of 5]

“So what do we discover in other people that makes us love them?”

Mình đọc nhiều review cho rằng I Have a Secret khó hiểu, đúng là khó hiểu, nhưng càng đọc mình lại thấy thích. Mình hoàn nắm bắt được ai là người kể chuyện.
Câu chuyện xoay quanh năm người bạn, họ đều có những cá tính và sở trường riêng biệt, và họ đều có những "bí mật". Sau những ngày tháng đọc "giết chóc" - thriller/mystery, mình cảm thấy nhẹ nhàng và yên bình khi đọc I Have a Secret.

Những nhân vật được miêu tả ổn và mình yêu quý họ, họ có những cảm xúc và những lo âu của riêng họ - điều đó tạo nên con người của họ. Yoru Sumino khắc họa nên những lo lắng, cảm xúc của tuổi trẻ hoàn hảo và tinh tế. Mình đã cười, đã buồn ở một vài khoảnh khắc.

Một câu chuyện nhẹ nhàng, vui nhộn, nhân vật đa dạng; đọc xong mình nhìn lại, khoảng thời gian đi học biết bao kỷ niệm và lo toang, những lựa chọn cho tương lai chính bản thân. Nhất định sẽ đọc thêm sách của Yoru Sumino.

Dear Future Me:
Promise me one thing. No matter what you do, no matter who you do it with, no matter who you become…just promise me that you’ll read these letters with a smile.
Until then, I wish you the very best.
P.S.
Oh, and I hope someday you’ll see an arrow that’s pointed at you!

[Edvard · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was a perfect reflection of youth and growing into yourself. The five main characters have one chapter each in which they show how they visualise reading other people, and although normal real people don't have such clear pictures of how humans work, it perfectly demonstrates why certain people see others in certain ways. Each character had their own conflict and thought processes and I think Sumino really understands all kinds of people with how she can so perfectly portray their thought processes.
It's a story about navigating your first relationships, figuring out what you want to do with your life, and learning to accept yourself even if you sometimes feel like a fraud.
I must recommend this book to anyone around high school age, because it really is a wonderful read.

[Nattapan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Interesting plot, but a bit boring.

Sometimes, special ability is more a curse than a blessing, especially when you know only a part of the whole story.

[onmerryday · Rating 4 out of 5]

จบเล่มแรกของปี ซื้อเล่มนี้เพราะชอบเรื่องก่อนหน้าของคนเขียน(ฝันถึงเรื่องนั้นอีกแล้ว) เรื่องนี้ออกแนวใสๆ ความรัก ความฝันของเด็กวัยเรียน มีกิมมิคตรงตัวละครแต่ละตัวเห็นสัญลักษณ์แสดงความรู้สึกของคนอื่น แต่ไม่ได้แฟนตาซีมาก จะเน้นถึงความสัมพันธ์ระหว่างเพื่อน ความซับซ้อนของอารมณ์ มิติของความคิด อ่านแล้วเหมือนจะอิน เรื่องอารมณ์ความรู้สึก ความคิด ปฏิกิริยาทางสังคมของคนเราเป็นเรื่องที่อธิบายลำบาก เรื่องนี้ถ่ายทอดออกมาได้ดีในระดับหนึ่ง แต่มีบางส่วนที่อ่านแล้วงงๆ อยู่

เรื่องจะแนวเรื่อยๆ ประมาณอ่านมังงะ school life พอดีกำลังอยู่ในโหมดอ่านการ์ตูนแนวนี้ เลยชอบพอสมควร ถ้าอ่านช่วงอื่นอาจจะเบื่อนะ

ตอนแรกตั้งใจว่าอ่านจบแล้วไม่ถึง 5 ดาวจะขายเลย แต่ชอบปกและความรู้สึกเวลาถือหนังสือสวยๆ อยู่ในมือ เอาไว้ก่อนละกัน (โรคบ้าหนังสือสวยกำเริบ เดี๋ยวก็ต้องโละเยอะๆ อีกหรอก)

[Samuel Faraday · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another amazing work by Yoru Sumino. No matter what she writes, I’m guaranteed to read it and this is no exception.

The story follows 5 distinct high schoolers and their personalities, thought processes, and personal struggles. As well, it follows their ‘unique’ secret they each have. Oddly enough, these powers are available to every human. You can tell all of the things they can through a person’s expression and body language but here, in this work, it’s made more apparent and distinct in order to tell a story with shifting perspectives that blend into a cohesive literary work.

If I had to give a single main moral lesson to this story, amongst the others it teaches, it would be. . .

Don’t think so hard. Feel more.

[Tyler · Rating 3 out of 5]

Probably my least favorite Sumino work but still worth a read. The social superpower aspect with a POV change each chapter that continued to progress the story was a neat idea and executed decently, but the story fell a bit flat in comparison to other Yoru Sumino works for me personally.

[Isaac · Rating 3 out of 5]

読んでいて虚しくなる
短いので、読むのにそれほど時間はかかりません。

[Chelsea Kelly · Rating 3 out of 5]

3/5 Stars: ‘I Have a Secret’ by Yoru Sumino.
→ Age Range: Young Adult.
→ Genre: Magical Realism, Contemporary Light Novel.
→ Trigger Warnings: Impostor Syndrome, Anxiety, Depression.

In-depth Rating:
→ Plot: ★★★★★
→ Character Development: ★★★★★
→ Setting: ★★
→ Entertainment Level: ★★★★★
→ Writing: ★★★

General Comments: A subtle coming-of-age novel combined with supernatural overtones; intriguing, gentle, and realistic – a tale about love, life, and things we leave unsaid. Split into five chapters, each from the perspective of the main characters, it explores themes of teen-youth: from unspoken feelings, to buried pain. The harbouring of special emotional indicators twists familiar tropes excellently.

Favourite Quote: ‘Life’s too short to be able to fit in every single thing you want to try, so there’s no sense wasting time doing stuff you hate.’

Time Read: Two Days.
→ Audiobook: No.
→ Audiobook Narrator: -

[Liam || Books 'n Beards · Rating 4 out of 5]

"The people in my life all had their own lives before me, and maybe they'll have their own lives after me, too. I only get to see a small fraction."

Five classmates - Kyou, Zuka, Mickey, Miyazato and Looney - navigate friendships, love and school life.

I really like Yoru Sumino. I WANT TO EAT YOUR PANCREAS is one of my favourite reads of the year, and I HAD THAT SAME DREAM AGAIN was an interesting concept and enjoyable read, even though it didn't quite reach the heights of the former.

PANCREAS takes the standard high school romance trope and makes it heart-wrenching, DREAM is a meta spin on a coming of age story.

I HAVE A SECRET follows in the same vein - taking a school drama/slice of life and putting an interesting twist on it. We have an extended chapter from each character's point of view, and each character has some power or ability to sense the mood, happiness or attachment of people around them. It might be seeing punctuation appear above a character's head, a see-sawing beam showing positive or negative, or hearing the beat of their hearts.

Each character has their own struggles and doubts - which makes it interesting seeing things from the outside and then leaping 'in' to them for their chapter. From the outside, we anticipate what their emotions or feelings may be, especially with each character's power - but once we see things from their point of view, we see what they were truly upset/worried/happy about.

The plot isn't particularly groundbreaking, but the interesting part comes from seeing each character from both outside and in, and the five of them are overall likable and inoffensive. The almost obligated romance is also handled in a sweet way and doesn't feel too cloying, as light novel romances sometimes can.

I think Sumino is becoming a must-read for me - his books aren't outstanding (with the exception of I WANT TO EAT YOUR PANCREAS), but they're just so creative and fascinating with how they mess with formulas.

A very enjoyable read!

[Emily · Rating 3 out of 5]

This novel was about perspective and perception; how people interpret the world and people around them. Each of the five characters had a different 'special ability' that helped them to understand people's emotions. Yet despite this, the only real complication in the story was the continual miscommunication between the characters. I didn't connect with or care about any of the characters. But I continued reading waiting for the twist or turns that have occurred in other Yoru Sumino novels that I have read but nothing happened. This novel was pretty much a 'non-event'.

[Trigger Warning Database]

Trigger & Content Warnings

Anxiety
Depression

[Soung Iimoya · Rating 3 out of 5]

7/10

เรื่องราวเพื่อนร่วมห้อง 5 คน ที่มีความแตกต่างกัน มีความสามารถเห็นสัญลักษณ์แทนอารมณ์ความรู้สึกของคนอื่นแตกต่างกัน ที่กลายมาเป็นเพื่อนกัน

คิดอีกแบบ อาจเป็นการแทนสัญลักษณ์ในมือถือก็เป็นได้ เพราะคนเดี๋ยวนี้คุยกันทางมือถือมากกว่าคุยกันโดยตรง แต่ในเรื่องกลับไม่มีมือถือเลย...

คล้ายอ่านไดอารี่ความรู้สึกของแต่ละคนโดยเนื้อเรื่องต่อกัน

อ่านได้เรื่อยๆ ป๊อปปี��เลิฟ School life

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

With the way some things were written, like "exclamation points appeared over her head," this really should have been a manga, and the author should have done a better job at making it a novel. I get that light novels are different, but I don't understand this at all.

[Aaron · Rating 5 out of 5]

"We were all so clueless that it was kind of hilarious." (p. 209)

Five teenagers, in their final year of high school, quietly embark on a quest to disentangle the venal contingencies that bind their soft and elegant egos to the fabric of whatever constitutes their self-identity. This journey is neither planned nor intentional, but through it all, there is a fever of inevitability that refuses to break, a chancing of emotional uncertainty that harangues the good with the bad, with the hope of discerning the best.

I HAVE A SECRET fits nicely among Sumino's better titles for its indisputably slick concept and clever, low-key execution. Five kids each possess the ability to read other people's emotions, but there are two meaningful snags: (1) each character reads emotions differently, and (2) none of the characters know the other characters possess such a skill. The result is a puzzling together (or apart) of teenage anxiety, romance, and overconfidence through five different lenses and just as many multipliers of consequences.

Kyou is the most level-headed of the group. He is also, however, critically introverted and resists the urge to speak his mind to those he cares for most. Internally, this registers as cowardice. Externally, this registers as forlornness. And since Kyou reads others' emotions as punctuation marks floating above people's heads, he's self-conscious about monitoring his behavior to soothe the emotional well-being of others. An exclamation mark? Excitement. Eagerness. An ellipses? Deep in thought. An interrobang? Hyper-cautious.

I HAVE A SECRET is an equally funny and tense read for how it renders scenarios that are equally perfect, and equally horrible, for Kyou, or others, to analyze in situ. Kyou, for example, has a massive crush on Miki-san, the exuberant and athletic girl at the front of the class. If the boy reads Miki-san's floating punctuation as that of a girl aching for emotional validation, does he step forward and fill in the gap? The girl's personality is as bright as a shining sun, but there is a hesitancy and an emptiness about her. Does Kyou's knowing this give him the right to help her? Even though she has no idea who he is? Would this endear him to her? Or would he be abusing her emotional availability?

The ambiguity surrounding these questions and others fuel the novel's industrious annexation of young adults in search of belonging. Readers learn early and often there are no easy answers.

Kuroda-san is a girl frequently chided for saying or doing something awkward. She enjoys being different, even if it means "hid[ing] the truth behind some other truth" (p. 150). She enjoys doing the unexpected. It humors her and gives her energy. Kuroda cares for her friends deeply and meddles incessantly, but affectionately, because it adds color and fragrance to the world. And how, exactly, does Kuroda see the world? She can read the heart rate of others. Perhaps that's why, beneath the veneer of the excitable and "looney" Kuroda, rests the unsteady sense of self of a girl constantly modulating her behavior.

Alas, reading into the temperance of the hearts of others can prove troublesome. Does an even heartrate imply calmness or depression? Does an elevated heartrate imply quizzical affection worthy of a nudge in the right direction or does it imply a tepid nervousness inching ever so slightly toward trauma?

These boundaries are indefinite. And the blurrier the boundaries, the less palatable one's desire to become his or her own person. Readers won't be surprised then, when Zuka-san, a sporty and popular boy, and friend to Kuroda, gives the girl a reality check by declaring the fact that they can't succeed at being who they want to be is precisely what pushes them to keep on trying (Zuka: "We know who we wanna be, but we suck at it. We can't keep up the charade. We slip up at the most critical times -- especially me lately -- but I think that's why it never gets tiring," p. 153).

I HAVE A SECRET successfully pivots in this way, from purposefully jocular (Why is Miki changing her shampoo every three days?) to calculated tension (Why did the quiet girl who sits next to Kyou stop coming to school all of a sudden?). It uses its characters' unique abilities to read the emotions of others to position them to help one another, to harm one another, to believe in one another, to scare one another, and to find themselves in one another.

The novel asks difficult questions about the evanescence of young love: Miyazato-san can see arrows between people who have found true love, but sinks deeper into sadness upon realizing nobody's arrow ever finds her. The novel also asks difficult questions about the credulity of knowing oneself and exposing that knowledge to others: Zuka knows his apathy is his blind spot, but he also believes it's sinful to cling to others, "hoping to one day find the humanity [he] never had" (p. 201).

One particularly commendable facet of this book is its pacing and scope. The book takes place over the course of the teenagers' final year in high school, spring through autumn/winter. Each character snares a chapter, and each chapter takes place several weeks following the previous. This structure gives the characters and events room to flex and breathe and impresses upon readers the fundamental impermanence of things. Another day, another test. Another week, another club activity. Life moves on. Emotions shift. People change.

The narrative voices aren't too differentiated, with a few exceptions (e.g., Miki is too hilariously high-energy to miss), but the shift in emotional sensitivity from character (chapter) to character (chapter) is so unmistakable that Sumino can be forgiven for not varying perspective as deliberately.

And yet, I HAVE A SECRET, for all its mucking in the shadows of what a darkened heart is known for, is a novel with a positive outlook. There are romantic misunderstandings and platonic pledges of fealty, sure, but the book makes a conscious effort to show readers that it's worth exploring the difficult stuff so as to get to the better, kinder, gentler aspects of personal relationships. The challenge, of course, rests in not giving up until one's time is true.

[Katie (inactive) · Rating 3 out of 5]

This story revolves around 5 school friends who all have some kind of unique but mundane special ability that helps them tell how other people are feeling.

It was a cute story, and incredibly easy to read. But I often didn't really get the point of the characters' abilities. I felt like the abilities could have been entirely replaced with a sentence like "Miki looked confused" and it would convey much the same meaning. Also, even though they helped with understanding each others' feelings, it certainly didn't help prevent any miscommunication. Whew.

I would recommend the book for someone looking for a lighthearted school story with a close-knit group of friends and a (SMIDGE, literal smidge) of romance. I read it in Japanese and would say it's an appropriate level for low-intermediate learners.

[Joshua · Rating 4 out of 5]

A cute story from the perspective of five different friends as they wrap up their few years left together as high schoolers. Felt a bit odd at how accurate a given friend's judgement is of another, but not so much given the synopsis. The story gives an earnest attempt at answering the question, "How well can we understand one another if we have an extraordinary means of doing so?" The dialog at times can be difficult to keep track of, especially as one moves from one friend's perspective to the next, and leaves a lot of curiosity to whether or not they discover each other's secret. I wouldn't mind if there was an epilogue written from a future point in time that better unraveled this idea, but I think there's a certain beauty in the ambiguity presented.

[Snowdrop · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's a little lacking in the burst of emotions that I came to expect from Sumino-san as the previous two books (I want to eat your pancreas & I had the same dream again) were really awesome. Nonetheless, there are lessons to be learnt in this book,especially that of friendship, and our self-esteem. I resonate / relate a lot to Elle and her story is the one I enjoyed the most, followed by Looney and Mickey. Zuka also made me realise something - friendships are not that fragile after all. As long as we have been sincere with each other, that is. Still worth a read, just don't expect the high roller-coaster emotions.

[ManyMilds · Rating 4 out of 5]

เนื้อเรื่องเนิบๆไปหน่อย แต่จุดที่ชอบคือความอึดอัดจากเรื่องเล็กๆน้อยๆอย่างการแอบชอบเพื่อน จะพูดยังไงดี อาจจะเพราะเคยตกอยู่ในสถานการณ์คล้ายๆกับตัวละครกลุ่มนี้ ทั้งคนที่มองเห็นความลับ และคนทึ่มๆอย่างเคียวกับมิกกี้ แต่จะยื่นมือเข้าไปยุ่งมากก็ไม่ควร ส่วนเรื่องความสามารถพิเศษมันไม่ได้ให้ฟังแบบ'พิเศษ' อะไรขนาดนั้น ส่วนตัวแล้วมันก็คือการจับสังเกตพฤติกรรมเฉยๆน่ะแหละ เพียงแต่คนเขียนเอามาพูดในแง่การเห็นสัญลักษณ์ เราเลยมองว่ากิมมิคดี แต่ก็อ่อนจนแทบจะเบาบาง

[Jenn Odd · Rating 3 out of 5]

** Most Disappointing Sumino Novel Yet **

Sumino's novels often seem mundane at first but there's always a plot that has me hooked and often a twist that has me thinking about the story after. But in かくしごと nothing happens.

There are too many characters telling their own mini stories to get a good overall plot in. And the ending was so disappointing and pointless.

[-moonprismpower- · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked the characters.
I liked the fact that each character had their own chapter and their own way to gage other people’s feelings.

But....

WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THIS STORY??!

I was waiting for the climax, but there wasn’t one??? And the “secrets” these kids have are not even that big of a deal???

[J · Rating 3 out of 5]

What an interesting idea. We could all be super-heroes if we just regard others, our peers, with an eye to greater empathy. Yoru Sumino does a great job of distinguishing the variant voices of the cast of characters.

[mimi · Rating 4 out of 5]

ตอนอ่านปกหลังครั้งแรก ก็แอบคิดไปว่าจะออกแฟนตาซี วัยรุ่นกอบกู้โลกหรือเปล่าน้า แต่จริงๆแล้วเกี่ยวกับตัวละครที่มีความสามารถพิเศษต่างๆ เนื้อเรื่องดำเนินไปแบบเรื��อยๆ ความสัมพันธ์ที่ค่อยเป็นค่อยไป ไม่ว่าจะเพื่อนหรือความรัก จนบางครั้งก็ชวนคิดว่าตอนอยู่ม.ปลายเราเคยหนักใจอะไรแบบนี้มั้ยนะ หรือว่าเคยเกิดความรู้สึกแบบนี้มั้ยนะ 55555555

[Crocat · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not sure whether it's the light novel format or the book itself, but it was kinda off for me... I can see the appeal, though, and it'd probably be cute as a manga or an anime. I think this on the nose way of expressing life views/emotions/etc just didn't really work for me in a book.

[Tom · Rating 1 out of 5]

Reading this, I realized that light novels are not for me whatsoever. This book is super predictable and boring and just reminds me of every anime movie ever. Do not recommend - unless that's your thing.

[Kaio · Rating 2 out of 5]

Lacking for better or worse

[Triscia Katerina · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.25

A one-day read. Ending fell flat but I loved the characters' relationships!

[Cassie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I genuinely really enjoyed this. Progressing the story through different perspectives was a nice touch.

[a-ship-shipping-ship.mp4 · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well, this book is nice. It's kinda cute. I liked seeing the world from each character's point of view, given their power. However, it fell short for me. I know the book is called "I Have a Secret", but I really hoped at the end they all came together and kind of confessed their power or something, and that would make their bond grow stronger, but that did not happen at all. And because the story was fractioned in each character's perspective, I feel like there was a lot lost between chapters and left to say at the end. What I mean is that it would've been so nice if we got an epilogue in which we see them all together in a third person's perspective, but still being able to see their ability, because that would've made it more meaningful, and overall fun. This being said, I still see how this book could impact someone who struggles with their identity, and that is meaningful of a book to do, although it's not life-changing, dare I add. So, as interpersonal relationships and my place in the world are two things I honestly don't really care about, this book didn't strike anything in me. Still, I think it's worth a read.

[Riri · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a subtle and reflective coming-of-age story of five teenagers as they navigate their last years in high school, each with their own secrets and personal struggles. There is no intense build-up leading to a gripping climax and the ending is left open too, but it's a pretty refreshing read that carries the scent of adolescent.

The book starts with Kyou's perspective, then shifts to Mickey's, Looney's, Zuka's, before wrapping it up in Elle's point of view. It's interesting to see that time passes with each perspective change, so it's like watching a patchwork of everyone's youth. They're all struggling to find out who they are, where they belong in the world, and understanding each other. Zuka actually puts it really nicely:

"We were all so clueless that it was kind of hilarious."

It's what everyone goes through in their teenage years. It may not be an exhilarating adventure story, but it is beautiful in its own way.

[Erika · Rating 4 out of 5]

この著者の作品を読むのは、「君の膵臓をたべたい」に続く二作目。
というか、作者よりも題名の謎さが気になって読んでみたが、予想していたより面白く読めた。

ファンタジーっぽい要素もちょっとあるけど、色々見えてるからって相手の事が100%分かるわけじゃないし、勘違いもする(世界の解釈の仕方次第で変わる)、それぞれのフィルターがあって違う解釈をしてしまうってのがリアルでカオス。
このカオスとリアルさが良かった。
それに、「ファンタジー要素」だって、私達はこういう風にはっきり目に見えてないだけで、相手の顔色や声音で状況判断をしてるという事を「頭上に浮かぶ！マーク」「心に浮かぶ感情のシーソー」「頭上に浮かぶトランプのマーク」なんかで表現している、と思うと興味深い。

そして、「君の膵臓をたべたい」の時のような、「叙述トリック」と言えるような記述もあったりして、軽い青春群像劇となめてるとビックリする。

が、途中でちょっと失速する気がする(登場人物達の関係に慣れてきて、彼らの中のいざこざが些細な事で大げさに騒いでるような感じがしてきてしまった…でも高校生ってこんな感じだった)のが残念だけど、「特殊能力」が話のフォーカスではなくて、あくまでも５人の青春の一幕が描かれているんだと思えば、楽しめる。

…表紙の絵が、こういう今風のイラストじゃなければなぁ…

メモ: か「」く「」し「頁
幕間のスペシャルストーリー
本の裏表紙にあったQRコードから飛べるURL:
https://www.shinchosha.co.jp/ka-ku_4-...
A:ネギ/唐揚げ/真っ赤/缶コーヒー/子猫
→各物語の間に何があったのかが分かるので、繋がりがスムーズに感じる。
けれど、読まなくても本編は十分に楽しめる。