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The Power of Kindness: The Unexpected Benefits of Leading a Compassionate Life

Piero Ferrucci,

Vivien Reid Ferruci (Translator)

4.06 · Rating details · 1,754 ratings · 242 reviews

"A book after my own heart!"--His Holiness The Dalai Lama
The Power of Kindness is a stirring examination of a simple but profound concept. Piero Ferrucci, one of the world's most respected transpersonal psychologists, explores the many surprising facets of kindness and argues that it is this trait that will not only lead to our own individual happiness and the happiness ...more

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Paperback, 288 pages

Published October 4th 2007 by Tarcher/Penguin (first published November 30th 2005)

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May 29, 2008 Jodi Maples, MSW, LSW rated it really liked it

As I deal with a bit of back-stabbing and the bitterness in my stomach grows, it is this book that helps me strengthen the filter in my brain & NOT actually say the evil thoughts running through my head. It reminds me that compassion is a good thing, that the person not treating me kindly is probably in a very bad place herself. It helps me to remember to "Rise above it all."

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Mar 28, 2014 Rachel rated it really liked it

A nice, soothing reminder that you shouldn't be a jerk.

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Apr 22, 2011 Sarah rated it did not like it

or... Cute Stuff My Son Said in the Car the Other Day.
Okay, so to be totally honest. I haven't READ this book. I picked it up for a book club, and sat down to read it, filled with giddy anticipation that it might be like Field Notes on the Compassionate Life (which I LOVED) and instead, I quickly realized that it is just a bunch of shlocky maple syrup doused over whipped cream. I began skimming over pages of sentimentalism and then starting flipping. No matter where I turned, it was still mumbo ...more

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May 14, 2010 Shannon rated it liked it

I was in the need for a spiritual type read and this one hit the spot. It helped re-ground me as I have become too busy and too rushed to really take things in. This reminded me that i talk too much and don't listen enough. It also reaffirmed my belief of the importance of being kind and continuing to give. Good book for my life right now.

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Jul 25, 2014 S rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: being-human, read-in-2014

This book is a little conflicting for me. It has some wisdom in it, a lot of stories and metaphors, and a few references to the studies it mentions.

I enjoyed the stories, but in a book that is talking about the outcomes that will occur from actions you take (e.g. being kind will make you & others happier), I like to see a bit more research on the subject (including references to the studies) and a lot less anecdotal evidence.

That being said, there were some good bits of wisdom in there and ...more

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Dec 10, 2010 Walter rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

This is an excellent book! It is so full of wisdom that, paradoxically, it's almost a challenge to read and process all of its insight. Piero Ferrucci, the author, is a practicing psychiatrist in Italy who uses kindness as a metaphor to explore the qualities/aspects that make a fulfilling life. In the process, he examines various aspects of kindness - from Honesty to Forgiveness to Trust to Humility to Service, etc. - including how and why they are relevant, how we should conceive of and use This is an excellent book! It is so full of wisdom that, paradoxically, it's almost a challenge to read and process all of its insight. Piero Ferrucci, the author, is a practicing psychiatrist in Italy who uses kindness as a metaphor to explore the qualities/aspects that make a fulfilling life. In the process, he examines various aspects of kindness - from Honesty to Forgiveness to Trust to Humility to Service, etc. - including how and why they are relevant, how we should conceive of and use them in our own lives, etc. In so doing, he takes on a journey of who we all wish we could and should be, often approaching familiar subjects in new and unexpected ways.

For example, Ferrucci's take on Patience begins with an Ethiopian folk tale, moves on to a rumination of how difficult people can be softened/turned around by unexpectedly kind treatment, then reflects on the modern tendency to "leave our souls behind" and engages in an extended consideration of the concept of time, including a very interesting application of Buber's I-Thou/I-It rubric. Along the way, he challenges us thoughtfully to examine what we believe both generally and about ourselves and then shows us alternatives that will make us both more kind specifically and better people generally.

There are a few interesting juxtapositions in the book that lessen its impact somewhat, but these are minor in both extent and consequence. For example, in an aside in the Memory chapter, he recounts a story of being asked for directions by a woman seeking food for her child, but his response - he judges her and then chooses not to assist her - seems less than kind. This proves that the author is human, but, thankfully, is such a rare occurence that it is noteworthy only because it contrasts so greatly.

In summary, I highly recommend this book to anyone and everyone - we can all benefit from its piercing insights and its very helpful guidance. Ferrucci has written a classic. I, for one, value it so highly that I intend to read it again from time to time to keep its lessons fresh and top of mind. ...more

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Apr 18, 2015 Donna rated it liked it

Shelves: non-fiction

This started out as a 2 star read. The author was taking his views of kindness and supporting it with everything from fiction to history, and fables to ad campaigns. While I can appreciate a certain amount of ingenuity, it seemed like the author was trying to make mere kindness sound like it was elusive.

However, once, I got through the first part where he was trying to explain everything, I felt more impressed with the true message behind his words. And that I could appreciate. I also liked his ...more

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Jan 15, 2008 Cheyenne rated it liked it

This is a great book to dip into whenever you feel cranky, frustrated, angry, etc. It reminds you of those qualities (patience, generosity, flexibility) that are fundamental to any relationship, at home, at workanywhere. It goes beyond self-help anecdotes to offer some fascinating science and compelling evidence behind what makes people thrive. I read it on and off for a couple months. And then I gave my copy to someone else. I asked them to give it to someone else when they were done. ...more

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May 07, 2019 Hagar rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: books-i-have

I absolutely loved this book!
I think this is one of the books that has everything to do with timing. Had I read it a couple of years ago, I think Id have found it rather dull and stating the obvious. But the fact that I read this book at this point of my life made it really helpful. It felt like some compassionate voice reminding me of all the ways to be kind, the small things & the big things, and also all the reasons one should be kind, to others surely, but to ones self as well.
The ...more

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Nov 18, 2012 charlie rated it really liked it

I dipped in and out of this for over a year. I really got into it recently and really enjoyed the different chapters, stories, mythology used to explain the different facets of kindness. A book i'll keep and come back to over the years.

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Jan 25, 2017 Amy Day rated it really liked it

A warm and well read audible book reviewing and reaffirming the many rewards for living a life of kindness. Health, happiness, peace, love and joy fill our lives and all others through simple kindness.

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May 02, 2019 Lauren added it

Shelves: didn-t-finish, audiobooks

DNF. It feels a bit cruel to leave an unkind review for this book, but here we are. (Note: Has this joke been made multiple times already in the reviews section?) (Update: Only somewhat.) This book didnt click with me at all and felt way too much like an inspirational page-a-day calendar. I wanted to like it, but I wanted more evidence and less sections that began, Theres an old Buddhist/Christian/Sentinelese story that goes like this . . . If youre going to convince me to chat up strangers on ...more

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Jan 24, 2020 JM Pama rated it it was amazing

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.

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Feb 29, 2020 Ashley rated it it was amazing

This has turned into a daily read. Always relevant.

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Mar 05, 2019 Kristin rated it liked it

No great revelations.

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Nov 06, 2017 Gabbi rated it it was amazing

This is the type of book everyone should read once a year, at least. It's so easy to understand and apply to daily life. I felt optimistic every time I opened it. It's beautiful.

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Sep 16, 2018 Beth rated it it was amazing

Excellent book. I feel good I'm on the right track but still have work to do especially with patience.

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Mar 04, 2020 Beth rated it really liked it

Shelves: nonfiction, how-to-live

Lots of thinking after this book. It was the book I needed to read now. I will reread, but a chapter here and there as I need it

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May 07, 2017 Sabrina rated it it was amazing

This should be required reading for every human being.

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Apr 19, 2018 Erin rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Annual read

This is a book Ill want to read annually. So much truth and wisdom- Ill need much more time to soak it in. ...more

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Dec 21, 2016 Catie rated it really liked it

"The fabric of our life is made of care, solidarity, mutual service."

"If we give warmth, we do not end up feeling cold. The benefit is symmetrical. In giving our warmth--and so too our vital presence, our positive, nonjudgmental attitude, our heart--we can bring into the lives of those near to us vital, sometimes extraordinary, changes. And we, too, do not remain unchanged."

"Empathy is a prerequisite for communication, collaboration, and social cohesion. If we annul it, we return to savagery--or ...more

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May 21, 2012 Sarah rated it really liked it

I am not a big fan of the Self help genre but this book is quite cute. Filled up with all kinds of multi-cultural and interfaith stories of the power of kindness. Slightly redundant on the health benefits of kindness, but perhaps I just am not as into that. I love how kindness the general term is broken up into all of it's virtuous counterparts, makes you truly realize how profound kindness is! An important part of life to easily overlooked in a sensational and individualistic society. The book ...more

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Feb 23, 2016 Jessica Jarrett rated it it was amazing

I believe this book should be read every morning for the rest of your life; every chapter has a little excerpt by which to refocus your attention and realign your positive energy with the universe. It is not a book to be read quickly and put on the bookshelf as "finished." It is a book to be read slowly and digested just as carefully until you can in grain it's knowledge into your soul. It is a book about life long learning which can answer some of the most pressing questions about the nature of ...more

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Mar 12, 2008 STEPHANIE rated it it was amazing

Recommends it for: anyone, everyone, you, you and you.

Recommended to STEPHANIE by: checked it out on a whim, then bought it.

Shelves: my-favorites

I highly recommend this book to anyone who thinks they know about kindness....seriously, I thought that this book wouldn't teach my anything new, but it did. And in many ways.
The author does not incorporate any sort of religious views, so there were some empty spots that I had to fill in myself. However, he does such a wonderful job at explaining how kindness is more than being nice to someone, that it is the underlying theme in many virtues (humility, honesty, forgiveness etc.)

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Jan 01, 2015 Jeff Giuliano rated it liked it

Not a terrible book, not a great book. The author uses stories and fables to illustrate his points about kindness. He separates kindness into 18 different attributes. It's a little lengthy and cumbersome but not a terrible read.

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Aug 05, 2008 Stephanie rated it really liked it

This book hasn't inspired any huge revelations in me, and I couldn't read it all at once when I tried. But I find that a chapter once in a while, read to me by my husband at bedtime, is calming and a good reminder of how and why to be more compassionate in everyday life...

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Aug 13, 2008 Jesse rated it really liked it

Really powerful book on living a life worth loving. Great book, and one that should be reread....

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Nov 16, 2018 Crystal rated it it was amazing

I am not a self-help type of reader, I have no reason to read such topics. The book itself does classify as a self-help but Im a strictly science fiction or generally fiction type of gal. I will admit that this might be the last time I read a self help book, but I'll give Ferrucci a pass. I came across the book by mistake because I had six bucks to waste while online shopping and I thought it was poetry. And what a glorious mistake it was.
While reading , it was as if Piero Ferrucci was reading I am not a “self-help” type of reader, I have no reason to read such topics. The book itself does classify as a self-help but I’m a strictly science fiction or generally fiction type of gal. I will admit that this might be the last time I read a self help book, but I'll give Ferrucci a pass. I came across the book by mistake because I had six bucks to waste while online shopping and I thought it was poetry. And what a glorious mistake it was.
While reading , it was as if Piero Ferrucci was reading it to me, he writes as if he was with me in the room which I found very therapeutic. The book itself is an easy read. The language was easy, relatable and touching. The context at times makes me want a shed a tear or yell at the world. Within the first few chapters you can't help but agree with Ferrucci's words, or at least debate with yourself about what type of person you are. It is not only that, but it makes you question others around you, Ferrucci makes you step out of your self absorbed ways without insulting your character. It's as if he sat you down himself and explained the world to you. He uses fact, religious, philosophical, and personal examples to argue how kindness is an essential aspect for a peaceful world and fulfilling life. It truly is a book for nurturing your soul and character.
He argues that there’s eighteen qualities that make up kindness.Honesty, warmth, forgiveness, contact, sense of belonging, trust, mindfulness, empathy, humility, patience, generosity, respect, flexibility, memory, loyalty, gratitude, service, and joy. It may be shocking, as it was for me, that kindness can be so complex and so simple at the same time. He writes, “Kindness is the universal remedy, first, for the individual and then for all of us.”
Ferrucci writing is refreshing to other writings full with grim and cynical views that reminds us how cruel the world is. However that doesn't mean that he isn't willing to play the devil's advocate. He easily writes a rebuttal to his arguments as if he could dwell into the audience mind and write what all of us are thinking, that we are all prone to argue how kindness can easily be taken advantage of. Yet, he easily writes it off and reminds us why we should be kind to others and ourselves. He says in chapter of forgiveness, “ Don’t mistake forgiveness for caricatures… it is not the same as condoning…that I don't want to continue feeding anger ... hence ruin my life, I will keep the harm in mind” he also says,regarding forgiveness, that it isn't self-righteous , he says, “ We feel that if we forgive, we lose our identity and then feel insecure…(but) forgiveness is a positive quality… we can compare an unforgiving person to a city whose ...completely congested.. No one enjoys life.” He also argues that trust is essential to kindness, one would argue that trust can be blinding and ignorant to the real world however, he states “a certain degree of suspicion is healthy and wise but when it forms into our character, and worldview then it becomes a hindrance.”
Ferrucci writing is both beautiful and eye opening. His writing isn’t biased and it doesn't feel like it's being shoved down your throat, like an elderly person scolding you. It is a book for self-care. This book can be read in one night because you can't get enough of his writing, however, I found that reading it slowly, savoring every chapter is how it was meant to be read. A simple chapter will make you want to stop and question why you haven't found this book earlier. I bought this book as a mistake, but I realized how fantastic that mistake was. ...more

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Dec 11, 2018 Jerry Rose rated it it was amazing

"When we stroke a purring cat, hold a newborn baby, or help a friend in need, who is gives and receives the tenderness?...Service helps not only the receiver, but also the server"

Written in a language fit for a High Schooler, Pierro Ferucci's The Power of Kindness is a compilation of commiserate ejaculations which follow a moral life of kindness, through the repetition of a self-evident ideal.

The ideal: Kindness and generosity is the way to hapiness and fulfillment, a lifting up out of "When we stroke a purring cat, hold a newborn baby, or help a friend in need, who is gives and receives the tenderness?...Service helps not only the receiver, but also the server"

Written in a language fit for a High Schooler, Pierro Ferucci's The Power of Kindness is a compilation of commiserate ejaculations which follow a moral life of kindness, through the repetition of a self-evident ideal.

The ideal: Kindness and generosity is the way to hapiness and fulfillment, a lifting up out of depression with a holiness to fill its place. Be kind to others. Not for external praise, not to acquiesce another's wish when deep down we dissent such actions, and not as reaction formation - transferring fetish energy for taboo desires into a socially acceptable practice of i.e. kindness. But for the sake of being kind. You must remove the distractions of the light of the world above. You must find in the darkness of quiet and jealous solitude the desire for kindness within your inner self and practice it. As your kindness now comes from w/o axilary promise, your life will change with positive qualities: warmth, friendship, joy, flexibility, forgiveness, patience, generosity, humility and respect.

The compilation is filled with awe-inspired movements, including:
1. classic literature references (Dante's Inferno and how the soul's being lost and returning to Paradise allowed gratitude and humility in Dante's protagonist; Huxley)(Mikalyi Czecenko's flow in reference to joy)
2. personal stories, over the course of Piero's lifetime, through his journey about medeterranian and Near East. (his son encountering humility and flexibility in restaraunts;helping a hitchhiker in a blizzard only to have his car break down after dropping her off)
3. historical anecdotes of religion and emporor kings around the world (American President Teddy Rosevelt, Taoists, Hasids, chinese emporors, indian Rajas, Krishna's maya, Kind David, African story of the spider Ananse collector of knowledge, the Pygmalion phenomenon-if I change my perception of you, you will change-in the context of masks we wear to project roles to gain respect)

I understand altruism and other selfless acts more after reading this book. The altruistic person feels nourished when he encounters a stranger; he fosters a sense of belonging in his community, established on grounds of friendship, not hate, but kindness. ...more

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Nov 20, 2016 Claudia rated it really liked it

Shelves: nonfiction, 2016-book-challenge-160-books

I need to be kinder. Others need to be kinder. But how do we do that with intentionality and sincerity? Without coming across as fake?

This book links the quality of kindness with others...Honesty, Warmth, Forgiveness, Sense of Belonging, Trust, Mindfulness, Empathy, Humility, Patience, Generosity, Respect, Flexibility, Memory, Loyalty, Gratitude, Service, and Joy.

Each chapter deals with one of these qualities, and is a strange combination of scientific studies, personal stories, fables and ...more

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