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Love You Hate You Miss You

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Get this, I'm supposed to be starting a journal about "my journey." Please. I can see it now: Dear Diary, As I'm set adrift on this crazy sea called "life" . . . I don't think so.

It's been seventy-five days. Amy's sick of her parents suddenly taking an interest in her.

And she's really sick of people asking her about Julia. Julia's gone now, and she doesn't want to talk about it. They wouldn't get it, anyway. They wouldn't understand what it feels like to have your best friend ripped away from you.

They wouldn't understand what it feels like to know it's your fault.

Amy's shrink thinks it would help to start a diary. Instead, Amy starts writing letters to Julia.

But as she writes letter after letter, she begins to realize that the past wasn't as perfect as she thought it was—and the present deserves a chance too.

276 pages, Hardcover

First published May 26, 2009

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About the author

Elizabeth Scott

49 books3,459 followers
Hey there, I'm Elizabeth. I write young adult novels. I live just outside Washington DC with my husband and dog, and am unable to pass a bookstore without stopping and going inside.

All right, and I can't leave without buying at least one book.

Usually two. (Or more!)

My website and blog are at elizabethwrites.com, and I'm also on twitter, tumblr, and facebook

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5 stars
2,328 (29%)
4 stars
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3 stars
2,163 (27%)
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223 (2%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 546 reviews
Profile Image for L A i N E Y.
396 reviews672 followers
December 23, 2019
This book smashed the reading slump right out of me. One furious smash like it was nothing at all. Wow. (And just how had I never heard of Elizabeth Scott before was beyond me.)

I could feel, strongly, the simmering rage just right under Amy’s skin, so ready to burst right out and destroy everything around her. How raw and real it feels.

One caveat though - if you hate ‘only tell don’t show’ books, stay away from this one! It just so happens that I was one of those who don’t mind if you don’t show me IF you do it ‘well’.
Profile Image for Nomes.
384 reviews377 followers
February 28, 2011
t's no secret that I am huge Elizabeth Scott fan. She is so diverse in what she writes. If you were to read Something, Maybe, you'd think she was a quirky, light-hearted rom-com kinda author. My librarian recently read Living Dead Girl and was astounded when I said her other work is often funny and sweet. Living Dead Girl so haunted my fave librarian that she is scared to let young teenagers read it :) Love You Hate You Miss You is edgier than some of her other work (nothing like Living Dead Girl though) and it's one of my favourite reads this year.

On first appearances, LYHYMY may seem like a cliche story-line: girl's vibrant best friend dies, girl is somehow responsible, girl seeing a psych and trying to move on with life. The thing Elizabeth Scott does best is take a ordinary situation and not only make it startlingly original, but also infuse it with real, living breathing characters.

LYHYMY is extremely readable. I was effortlessly turning the pages. It got me from page one where I instantly fell in love with Amy's voice. She's honest and refreshing and she worked her way into my heart.

Amy's parents are portrayed awesomely. Unlike many novels, her parents are together and happily in love. So in love in fact, that this in itself is a source of conflict for Amy - who makes three a crowd. I love how this impacts on Amy's decision in seeking out that belongingness with Julia.

And, although Julia was her bff, not all is as it seems - as the title suggests*. Friendships in teen years are complicated and the more you get into the book, the more you see the shades of grey in their relationship. As the book opens, Julia is already dead - yet Scott weaves in back story so brilliantly that you never feel like you are being taken out of the moment. For a dead character - Julia is contagiously vibrant and alive :)

Of course, Scott always has the most crush-worthy of love interests, and she out-did herself with Patrick. He is the quiet, mysterious type. A lot of love interests win over fans hearts by witty lines, looking hot, being romantic, etc, etc. Patrick is more of a typical teenage guy. He stares out the window. A lot. Sometimes he doesn't even talk. When he does, he's not trying to dazzle anyone. Despite Amy's first person POV, Scott really lets us peak into Patrick's soul and he is a fully fleshed out character, with his own set of problems, that you can't help but love. And, just like Scott doesn't write cliché characters, she also knows how to masterfully write those URST** moments. There's a few lines in there you can re-read to try and absorb how she does it.

So, you know, just a heads up that there's a bit of hotness in there :)

Here's a typical Patrick moment:

"It was Patrick. He was leaning against the wall, only not so much leaning as looking like he wanted to press through and get outside, get away. For some reason, I thought about asking him if he was okay, and even took an almost-step towards him, but before I could he looked at me and the expression in his eyes sent me walking away as fast as I could." p.151

Elizabeth Scott is also the master of showing, and her understated style of writing only serves to heighten the moments. Sometimes less is more:

"When he (Patrick) did, his hand touched mine, and I felt something, a strange, sudden jolt inside of me.

I used to act annoyed whenever Julia talked about Kevin and how she felt a spark every time he touched her, but the truth was, I knew exactly what she meant after that night.

He must've felt that jolt too because he said, "Oh," quietly, almost startled." p36.

It's a novel about friendship and grief and guilt and identity and love. It's an honest story about a girl - you see her bad choices and why she made them. And, it's by Elizabeth Scott, so, obviously, it's a must-read.

For more mature teens - touches on alcohol, drugs, sex and some occasional language.


*It's the coolest title, yeah?
*URST Unresolved Sexual Tension
Profile Image for Elyse.
68 reviews154 followers
December 24, 2008
Elizabeth Scott is a wonderful author, so I had high expectations for this teen novel--it did not disappoint. A compelling story of a teenage girl writing a journal to her best friend as part of her therapy after entering a rehab center for her alcohol abuse. The best friend died in a tragic accident. The story and characters unfold steadily, and our narrator is not your typical child from a broken home - quite the opposite, in fact - which was a refreshing change for teen novels. There was nothing stereotypical about this book. The recovery, the anxiety attacks, all that it takes to accept love in your life - were beautifully rendered.
Profile Image for Rose.
1,854 reviews1,046 followers
May 26, 2016
Quick review for a quick read. I think every Elizabeth Scott book I've read thus far has such a potent attention to the respective character emotions she showcases. This book does the grief and healing process after the loss of a friend very well. Amy has survivor's guilt over the death of Julia- her former best friend. The two girls were in an vehicular accident - with Amy drunk and Julia shaken by grief in the events of that respective night. "Love You Hate You Miss You" shows Amy grappling with people's perception of the event, her changed relationships, a potential romance (which I honestly felt was weak and underdeveloped compared to the overarching story), and trying to make sense of her own emotions and guilt in the aftermath. I really felt like I was in her head and grieving along with her, though I'll admit there were times when I found it hard to follow the poor choices she made. I felt the book did a great job of making the experiences intimate to Amy's character on an overarching note.

I only wish that the coming to terms didn't abruptly end as much as it did, and that the romance in this didn't really fall as flat as it did. Granted, I could definitely see Amy's emotions and connections, but it worked so much better with her grief and showing her relationship with her parents. I didn't like that the romance Amy was in mainly came in her grief process rather than as a naturally built chemistry. Overall though, this was an emotional and very strong read.

Overall score: 4/5 stars.
Profile Image for Katie.
882 reviews877 followers
March 3, 2009
Amy is full of guilt. She can barely look at herself after what she did. It has been 75 days since she walked away from the car accident that took the life of her best friend, Julia. She never should have gone to that party, never should have said what she said, never should have drank what she drank.

After grueling weeks of therapy at Pinewood, a rehabilitation center, Amy is starting school again with a whole new look. She is now the outsider, the girl with no friends because she killed her only one. The only way Amy knows to vent is through drinking and ever since the night of the accident she can't even look at a bottle without getting sick.

The new Amy, the one that doesn't drink or drive or party, finds that the only way she can get her feelings out are through writing in a journal to Julia, a journal filled with things that she could never get the nerve to actually tell Julia when she was still alive.

Elizabeth Scott takes you into the mind of a teenager who can barely live with herself after what she did but who finally manages to face reality and realize that the only way to move on is by letting go of the past. Love You Hate You Miss You is a story of healing and of learning to cope with the things you can't change. Through journal entries, Amy's memories of past times, and weekly therapy sessions, the reader can really see what Amy is going through.

Having read more than one Elizabeth Scott novel in the past, I had high expectations for this book and once again, Elizabeth Scott did not disappoint. The concepts of guilt, friendship, and love are beautifully put together in this story about the importance of friendship and family.
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
273 reviews725 followers
September 23, 2020
Love You Hate You Miss You follows Amy, who is essentially the same as the protagonist from Perfect You, except she's troubled and more cynical (if that's possible). Her best friend Julia dies in a tragic car accident that Amy feels responsible for, and she spends the entirety of the novel coping (or rather, really not coping) by writing letters to Julia and attending therapy sessions.

This is yet another infuriating story about people who refuse to talk to each other about how they're feeling and a girl who wont't take charge of a life that has taken an unfavorable left turn. And I know I'm an adult. I'm 24 years old so it's easy for me to think, "well, better pull your socks up and get a grip Amy, it's only going to get worse!" I never took charge of my situation when I was sixteen so I get it, I know. But even if the writing is accurate, it's not the type of character I want to read about.

I'll admit that I may be being minorly unfair, and that if I had come across this book seven or eight years ago I may have really liked it. I'll also say the ending saved most of the book. It was sweet and hopeful, and I felt like Amy had learned something, or at least was beginning to learn things. Still, it's not the best YA fiction I've read, and I don't think I would reccomend it.
Profile Image for Tatiana.
1,381 reviews11.7k followers
February 8, 2010
I suppose I shouldn't have read this book so close to another book with similar theme - Nancy Werlin's "The Killer's Cousin." Both books are about death, guilt and responsibility, but I think Scott's novel is a little weaker than Werlin's.

On the positive side, "Love You Hate You Miss You" is a very engaging story, written as a mix of letters to a dead person and a 1st person narrative. It took me just about 2 hours to get through this 300-page book. Amy's emotional state after the death of her best friend Julia, her road to recovery, her strained relationship with her neglectful parents are written well, with understanding and care.

On the other hand, the plot itself is a little disappointing. This is a story about friendship and the plot summary leads you to believe that through time, after being in rehab and talking to her shrink, Amy will finally see her relationship with Julia for what it is - as a destructive one. But Amy never quite gets there to my chagrin. She keeps treasuring this friendship in which they encourage each other to lead a life of promiscuty and addiction, and continues putting Julia on a pedestal. This just doesn't sit well with me.

Another aspect of the story that leaves you cold is the romantic line with Patrick. His emotional state is not quite clear to me and the ending decision of Amy's to move on with her life and attempt a healthy relationship with Patrick after having great sex with him (first great for Amy) is just a little overdone, considering that these are 16-year old kids. I would rather prefer a relationship based on an emotional connection rather than this.

Mixed feelings about this book, but I am willing to give Elizabeth Scott another try.
Profile Image for Reynje.
272 reviews965 followers
October 13, 2011

Alright, I’m officially an Elizabeth Scott fangirl. Can I have my badge now, please?

My rating of Love You Hate You Miss You is probably more indicative of my reading experience, given of the stage of life I’m in right now, as opposed to a rating of the book per se. Had this book been around when I was 17, I’d be slapping stars around with more abandon. Having some distance from that particular age, I read it with more appreciation for the quietly expressive writing, and rather less of the deeply visceral reaction it might have evoked some time ago.

The story takes the form of the first-person narration and letters written by sixteen-year-old Amy, to her dead best friend Julia. Amy is just out of a treatment centre, raw and angry and grieving, and her story unravels as she considers the evolution of her friendship with Julia, the events surrounding and preceding Julia’s death, and Amy’s relationship with her parents.

Distance and perspective make it a simple task to see the toxicity of Julia and Amy’s mutually enabling and some-what destructive friendship, and to be frustrated that Amy continues to put Julia on a pedestal to some extent. I’m still not sure whether I agree with Amy’s final assessment of Julia. But that’s me personally, and I do think that Amy’s viewpoint and opinions are very much reflective of her age and experiences. Scott depicts a friendship that is more complex than just categorically good or bad. For all the damage wreaked by Amy and Julia’s relationship, Scott also gives us glimpses into why these two connected and felt they needed each other. Agree or disagree, it’s almost an almost pitch perfect portrayal of a friendship that both fosters and soothes the insecurities and dependencies of two teenage girls.

However, the most interesting and touching relationship for me in this story was that of Amy and her parents. Amy’s feelings of isolation and exclusion from her parent’s obvious love and apparent pre-occupation with each other is a deviation from the usual YA tropes of dysfunctional or just plain absentee adults. The healing of the rift between parents and child is slow and hesitant, a tenuous thread of hope that Amy fears to grasp in the depths of her self-hatred.

I will confess that I was expecting a very dramatic climax to the story, so I was actually pleased with the more subdued and subtle way that it played out. Rather than overwrought scenes in which the main character hits rock bottom with a lot of tearful brouhaha, Scott writes Amy’s growing acceptance of herself and others with restraint and a sort of quiet tenderness. This, in my opinion, makes the close of the story much more affecting.

Scott’s writing and in particular her capture of Amy’s voice is clear and believable. There is a slight sparseness to the story, a stripping back to the bare bones of Amy’s emotional state, which avoids the heavy-handedness often found in so-called “issues” books. This reads more like a glimpse into the unfiltered thoughts of a troubled and grieving teenage girl, as opposed to a laboured pastiche of angst, drama and thinly-veiled moralising. Scott’s writing leaves the story open to the reader, and doesn’t answer every question posed in the text.

This is not an always an easy book to read, and there are definitely aspects of Amy and her choices that did not always sit well with me. But it’s moving and well-written, and I’m entirely won over by Elizabeth Scott’s beautiful handling of the story.
Profile Image for Jennifer Wardrip.
Author 5 books478 followers
July 2, 2009
Reviewed by coollibrarianchick for TeensReadToo.com

I've said this before and I am going to say it again: Elizabeth Scott's writing is chameleon-like. Some of her books are fluffy and light, the perfect poolside read, while some of her other books take on darker undertones. Where does her new book fall on this continuum? It's dark, not disturbingly dark but still dark, because the main character's emotional pain is very apparent.

I believe wholeheartedly that accidents happen and that blame is a waste of time and doesn't fix the problem. I also believe that you can't change the past, only move on with the future. While I may believe that, it doesn't mean that everybody else believes that.

This is especially true for Amy, the main character in LOVE YOU HATE YOU MISS YOU. She is hurting and thinks nobody in the whole world understands how it feels to lose a best friend. Even worse, she blames herself for her friend's death.

Over and over again, Amy is told it was an accident. You could say it to her a million times but it wouldn't matter - she still blames herself. She should never have done what she did. Truth be known, there were a lot of things she shouldn't have done, but who am I to preach to the choir?

Following a stint in rehab, Amy must go on with her life. Dealing was a bit easier in rehab because it was a controlled environment, but out in the real world, among her family and peers, dealing with Julia's death is an emotional roller coaster. Her shrink thinks writing a diary would help her greatly. At first, Amy is against the idea, but then she starts writing letters to Julia, which actually helps her cope.

Some of what Amy writes is funny, some letters are incredibly sad, while other letters are filled with anger. Many things come out in the letters. Through these letters we learn a lot about Amy and Julia's relationship, Amy's insecurities, as well as her home situation. Truths that were buried come to light and Amy learns that the past wasn't as perfect as she thought. And maybe it is the present that she should be focusing on.

I applaud Scott for not writing the pat happily-ever-after types of books. Once again, Elizabeth Scott has written a book that will stay with you long after it is done. How long do I have to wait until her next book comes out?

Profile Image for Natasha.
291 reviews30 followers
August 11, 2015
I get this feeling when I read the last page of a book. It's when I read the last sentence, and I close the back cover over it.
The first thought in my mind could be "Why did it end that way?" or "Okay. I see how the author is trying to close his/her book."
With LYHYMY, I read the last sentence and thought "Why did it have end at all?!" and then I closed the back cover and sat there. It was like a choked up feeling inside, just filled with emotion, and I realized Elizabeth Scott could not have chose a better ending.

Love You Hate You Miss You is a story about Amy, a teenaged girl just out of rehab for the recent ... Situations she's been through. (trying not to spoil, here.)
At the start of the novel, the reader realizes that Amy had lost her best friend, Julia, seventysome days ago. (S)He also finds out that Amy has had problems with substance abuse to alcohol.
Throughout the book, Amy writes letters to Julia, each addressed with the number of days since Julia has died.

What an amazing book. One of my favorite quotes is -
"The truth is, I feel beyond sad. I feel empty. Numb.
When I drank, this was always how I wanted to feel." (p.142)

Amy is courageous, strong, but she's just trying to find her place without Julia.
A must read.




Profile Image for PinkAmy loves books, cats and naps .
2,265 reviews216 followers
September 24, 2022
Grade: A

Amy gets out of rehab 75 days after she killed her best friend Julia. Now instead of being detached, her parents are super interested in everything she does, but Amy isn't buying their faux concern. Her therapist clicks her pen annoyingly and even worse, she recommended Amy for all honors courses instead of the slacker classes she's always taken. Then there are the whispers from the other kids, former friends and some new friends who are trying to befriend her. But, Amy pushes everyone away. Because she murdered her best friend in a car accident. Even though she wasn't driving.

LOVE YOU, HATE YOU, MISS YOU grabbed me from the first page. In journal entries, Amy writes letters to Julia, other chapters are her first person narration. Elizabeth Scott gave Amy a unique, authentic voice, depressed, sarcastic and grieving. Amy was often hard to like but easy to sympathize with, as she shut people out, pushed them away and was downright rude. She had horrible communication skills. Her character is a common archetype in contemporary young adult fiction, and I thought her snail-paced turnaround could have been quicker and more pronounced in stages. The minor characters weren't as fleshed out or unique, nobody transcended stereotypes.

I thoroughly enjoyed Amy's journey and this novel and recommend contemporary YA fans who enjoy books about friends, grief, depression, substance abuse or family.
Profile Image for Uci .
596 reviews110 followers
August 18, 2010
If you think being a teenager is hard, try to read this book!

Bener deh, saya sampai ikutan depresi membaca kisah hidupnya Amy. Walaupun juga jadi penasaran pingin cepat-cepat tahu endingnya. Saya jadi bersyukur nggak pernah mengalami masa remaja yang mumet kayak begini.

Coba deh, Amy si anak tunggal merasa tersisih di rumahnya sendiri karena ayah dan ibunya begitu saling mencintai sampai-sampai dia merasa kehadirannya di antara mereka hanya mengganggu kemesraan mereka.

Amy yang super tinggi dan berambut merah selalu merasa buruk rupa dan jadi orang aneh di antara teman-temannya yang 'normal' di SMA.

Amy yang akhirnya punya sahabat sejati, namun harus kehilangan sahabatnya dalam kecelakaan mobil sementara dia sendiri selamat.

Amy yang kecanduan minum sampai harus masuk rehabilitasi.

Untungnya tulisan Elizabeth Scott enak dibaca dan nggak bikin bosan walaupun peristiwa-peristiwa yang dikisahkan di sini bisa dibilang berputar-putar dalam lingkaran setan. Dan saya suka endingnya yang sangat positif, supaya remaja-remaja 'bermasalah' nggak terus-terusan depresi.

Sementara pesan buat orangtua, kenalilah baik-baik putra-putri remaja Anda sebelum semuanya terlambat... :)

Btw, ceritanya ini mirip dengan Vicky Angel karangan Jacqueline Wilson, cuma di buku Wilson tokohnya lebih muda.
Profile Image for Melody.
2,622 reviews251 followers
October 22, 2009
No blatant spoilers, but enough that you might not want to read this review if you plan to read the book.


Well-written but a little claustrophobic for me. We spend all of our time locked inside Amy's head, and it's not a particularly reasonable environment. Amy's lost her best friend, and her world is very unhappy and inhospitable. This book is about her journey through grief and pain. It's not that it's unbelievable, it is completely believable. The disconnect for me is that there's no clear message about how utterly wrong most of Amy's perceptions are. I wanted some tidying up at the end, I think. I didn't find the parents (any of them) particularly believable- but again, they may have been true to a skewed perception such as Amy's. I could certainly identify with the all-consuming friendship that is suddenly, irrevocably gone. A lot of what I didn't like about this book is how familiar it felt to be half a person in a school full of what look like whole people.

Disturbing and sad but worth reading, I think.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Sesana.
5,013 reviews348 followers
April 23, 2012
75 days ago, Amy's best friend, Julia died. We don't get the details right away, but we do know that Amy blames herself. Most of the book is in the form of her journal, written as letters to Julia. The rest is still in Amy's POV, but is more moment-by-moment, and is slightly more honest than the thoughts that Amy is intentionally "sharing" with Julia.

I've never read Elizabeth Scott before. Obviously, I should have. She writes Amy so believably, so emotionally that I was glued to every word. This, despite the fact that I didn't like Amy much. For most books, by most authors, that could have been a deal-breaker for me. But the fact was that Scott wrote her so well that I was attached for her, and wanted better for her, even though I didn't like her.

The ending is realistic. It's a turning point, not the final destination for Amy. When I put the book down, I was convinced that, from this point, Amy could become a better person, could learn to accept the role that she had in Julia's death, and the role that she didn't have. It was the best ending I could have asked for.
Profile Image for Janelle.
142 reviews
April 24, 2011
The first Elizabeth Scott book I read was Grace - & that was an incredible baptism of fire. LYHYMY was mildly intense in comparison, and a thoroughly amazing read.

One word - Patrick ;) Here are a few swoon worthy quotes about him.

I'd always picked skinny guys before, guys who were all bones and angles. Guys who were small in my arms, guys I could see around. Patrick was solid, and instead of ribs and shoulder blades, I felt mucsle rippling under his skin. It should have felt strange, but it didn't.

& this one...

"I lied to Julia, I didn't know what else to do because you - you make me feel..." I had to stop. Not because I didn't have words. I did. But I was afraid to say them.
He looked at me, and I knew then I could love him. That if I let myself I would.
"You make me feel too," he said, and held out one hand.
Profile Image for Richard.
424 reviews5 followers
October 16, 2021
Tense and emotional and a bit different. I do wish however that just for a change an American YA book did not have the inevitable hierarchy in the canteen scenes and not have who are just a bit feckless rather than angst ridden or way too confident .....other than that this was well written and a fine premise.
Profile Image for Becky.
5,000 reviews92 followers
March 11, 2009
Meet Amy. Trust me, you wouldn't want to be her. Amy is the star of Elizabeth Scott's latest, Love You Hate You Miss You. And it's a tough read--though not as touch as Living Dead Girl. She's an alcoholic. And a grieving one at that. Her best friend, Julia, died in a car accident. And Amy blames herself. But no amount of I'm sorry's and why's and if only's will bring her friend back. Life goes on...despite it all. And Amy's return to "normal" life, to school, is anything but easy. Facing the entire high school, knowing that many of Julia's friends despise her, blame her, feeling so alone. But there are a few in her classes who do anything but ignore her. Enter Mel and Patrick. And let's not forget her former friend, Caro, "Corn Syrup." Is there a place for Amy after all? Can she live again? love again? Find a way to smile again?

What did I love about this one? I'll be honest, it's partly all-about-Patrick. Elizabeth Scott has a way of writing irresistable guys. Amy's a troubled narrator--someone who aches down to her soul. The guilt. The shame. The feelings of self-hatred. Feeling like she should never have been born. The feeling that no one wants her, needs her, loves her. Whether Amy likes it or not she's vulnerable. And it is this vulnerability that makes me like her, love her. She's in need of so much. You want her to get it.
Profile Image for Aleboat.
63 reviews2 followers
August 11, 2014
Mmmm.... I want to say 3.75/5.

Okay, so. I liked it. I really did. It's just nothing unusual. I liked the story and how it is not about a typical high school student struggling with life. She's struggling with a loss so big it's almost unbearable. The book obviously talks a lot about Amy's feelings, but I didn't find them recurrent and I believed most of her arc development. I do think that the book resolves too quickly; as in, she suddenly understands and things (slowly, I'll give Scott that) get better.

The best, for me, was the family dynamic. I really think that this is what makes the book stand. I was more worried about how Amy would react to his parents than any school drama-love affair.

Definitely didn't disappoint.
Profile Image for Winna.
Author 17 books1,925 followers
August 25, 2017
This is my first Elizabeth Scott book, one i stumbled upon while reviewing Hold Still, which had a similar plot. I can't help but compare the two when i was finished with this one. Hold Still felt raw and honest, and while Love You Hate You Miss You was a lot more raw in some parts, it felt unrealistic to me. The main character Amy was extremely hard to relate to, as she was mainly angry and self destructing in every turn. What bothered me was not the fact that i could not understand her - it was that at the end of each chapter she turned around and went back to the beginning. It was gloomy, it was depressing, it lacked hope. Some parts did make me sad, but just as she was nearing something seeming like a new beginning, she went and ended the chapter with how everything was not going to change.

I get that this is probably intended to be something that is not easily solved by happy endings and bright new beginnings, but it would certainly be nice to see one.

Not to mention the dysfunctional relationships between the parents (Julia and Amy's), their frenemies (Caro and Beth), their love interests (Kevin and Patrick), even their own friendship. I found some hard to believe, especially how most of them was never really explained or everything just happened with them giving up to whatever consequences that dysfunctional relationship had left in the end. I felt disengaged from the characters, not really caring what happened next, and i did not like feeling so indifferent about a book. Hence the 2 stars.
Profile Image for Angelica Juarez Gonzalez.
312 reviews74 followers
July 29, 2017
Love you,
Patrick

hate you,
Julia

miss you
Amy.

Adoro las historias así, que sin pretenderlo, y pesar de tratar un tema como la muerte de un ser querido, en este caso la mejor amiga de Amy, son entretenidas, profundas en su sencillez, conmovedoras sin necesidad de caer en depresión y que, además, nos regala un final esperanzador. Sin bien no feliz del todo pero si encaminado a ello…
Profile Image for Jennifer.
3,433 reviews44 followers
May 9, 2021
This is a quick read, I finished it in an afternoon, but it packs a powerful emotional punch. Definitely not for the faint-of-heart, lots of trigger warnings, but I do recommend it.
Profile Image for Tânia.
356 reviews60 followers
January 14, 2012
This is not a book I love, Hate, or will Miss, but it’s a book that’s got me thinking about the “what if’s” of life. What if I was Amy and Julia my best friend, and all of a sudden I found her looking up at me, like she has done so many times, laughing, crying or smiling, but only this time there was no expression on her face, just complete stillness?

“She was looking at me… but she didn’t see me.”

What if I had been the last person to hold her hand and tell her everything would be okay, just moments before it would never be?

What if it was my fault?

“Love You Hate You Miss You” is a dark, moving and compelling book, and you can’t help but feel and root for Amy in this enduring struggle to learn how to be happy in the midst of pain, grief, guilt and anger, and ultimately to find the love that was clouded by all those feelings.

This is not my first Elizabeth Scott reading, I also read “Living Dead Girl” and “As I Wake”, both very different and unique from each other, and I noticed how her writing changes from book to book, almost like a chameleon changing colors. If I had to choose, “Love You Hate You Miss You” would be my favorite so far, in terms of writing style. This appealed to me the most, but unfortunately, as all her other works, I felt like there was something missing, or there could’ve been more.

Now the reason this book appealed to me the most were the diary entries addressed to Julia. Alternated with first person narrative chapters, this worked really well, and although it might sound a little claustrophobic at times to be inside Amy’s head all the time, it also brought me closer to the character.

“Get up, eat breakfast with Mom. Read encouraging note left by Dad, who has to leave early every morning because his company is in talks with another company in the UK and he’s having all these teleconferences. Take shower. Get dressed. Look in mirror. Still freakishly tall. Hair still the shade of red that makes people (usually old) say things like “My, it looks like someone lit a match on your head!” I miss you telling those people to watch out or they’d get burned.”

See, you can feel Julia inside this book even though she’s gone. Amy’s letters seem honest, raw at times, beautiful at others, and her voice is pretty authentic throughout the whole book. It’s not forced, she does sound like a 16-year-old teenager. I have mixed feelings about the characters, though. Amy’s’ parents didn’t seem believable, but I guess I might be influenced by Amy’s voice ranting in my head about how they never cared for her, they were only into each other, and she was really just a mistake, blah blah blah. But closer to the end they proved me and her wrong by acting like real parents. I think the problem was that Amy was too scared of being the real daughter.
Mel, Beth, and Corn Syrup were just okay; I never really cared much for them, but I liked that Corn Syrup finally stood up for herself. I was hoping to get more insight on Patrick, since he and Amy shared a connection, or should because I honestly didn’t feel it. It just came out as a cheap romance.

The story has a lot of loose ends; the end seemed too rushed, like the author was tired of being inside Amy’s head for this long. Like I said, I don’t love, hate or will miss it, but it definitely made me think about life and death. Mostly life.
Profile Image for Rachael.
611 reviews46 followers
May 10, 2009
It’s been seventy five days, and Amy still doesn’t know how to function. Seventy five long days and Amy doesn’t know how she’s supposed to live without her best friend Julia. But she has to live, because living without Julia is her punishment for letting Julia die. And so Amy struggles along, barely able to bear her parents’ phony concern, endure the trials of school, and weather her shrink’s uncomfortably probing questions. Angry and frustrated, Amy starts writing letters to Julia instead of journaling as her shrink suggested. But with that writing comes reflection and remembrance, and Amy starts to realize Julia may not have been the perfect friend Amy held her up to be, that there is a limit to what she can control or change, and that the future also deserves a change.

Scott has continually been one of my favorite authors for her incredible writing, and she does not disappoint with Love You Hate You Miss You. Scott departed from her usual unique teen romances, as in Bloom and Stealing Heaven, with Living Dead Girl to tackle more intense and serious topics. Even though the idea of Love You Hate You Miss You isn’t quite as original as Scott’s previous novels, since the “teen doesn’t know how to live once best friend dies” storyline has already been explored, this novel is still a moving and gripping peel into a mind devastated by loss. Amy is a realistic character, and her grief is compounded by insecurity, stubbornness, and loneliness. Her desires and despairs are surprisingly easy to relate to, because I’m sure everyone of us has visited a part of Amy’s life at least once, if not in such extreme a way as she. Amy’s struggles are so heartbreaking, and the reader really feels for her because of all she’s gone through. I find the human mind so fascinating, so I appreciate how Scott has broken down Amy’s head into surprisingly simple elements with such great insight. I like how Love You Hate You Miss You is much more than just a grief story; it’s a contemporary psychological novel that explores the effects of our choices through the span of time. I completely fell in love with this novel and commend Scott for her delicate writing and superb storytelling.

Fans of Scott’s earlier writing in Bloom, Stealing Heaven, and Something, Maybe will likely enjoy Love You Hate You Miss You even is the plot is so much different than Scott’s romances. This novel should also be read by fans of Freeze Frame by Heidi Ayarbe, The ABC’s of Kissing Boys by Tina Ferraro, and the very similar Cracked Up To Be by Courtney Summers. Love You Hate You Miss You is my new favorite from Scott, and I can’t wait to see what she has in store next.

reposted from http://thebookmuncher.blogspot.com
Profile Image for Angelic Zaizai.
976 reviews31 followers
March 2, 2010
Satu lagi novel bernuansa gelap dari Elizabeth Scott, memang tidak segelap Living Dead Girl sih, tapi tetap saja.

Amy mulai menulis jurnal berisi "surat" kepada Julia, 75 hari setelah kematiannya. Amy harus menjalani rehab ketergantungan alkohol dan berkonsultasi teratur dengan Laurie, sang psikiater.
Pulang ke rumah, Amy bingung melihat perubahan-perubahan, bukan hanya cat rumah atau kamar yang pindah, tapi juga sikap orang tuanya yang menjadi lebih perhatian padanya.

Amy gadis kesepian, kedua orang tuanya begitu truly madly deely in love with each other, sehingga sering 'melupakan' Amy, mengabaikannya. Bahkan tidak tahu bahwa Amy seorang vegetarian - Amy pernah mendengar mereka bilang bahwa dia hadir karena 'kebobolan'.
Amy mulai mengenal minuman keras, setiap kali pergi berpesta bersama Julia, agar bisa pede dan bersenang-senang.

Buat Amy, Julia adalah segala-galanya, sahabatnya, pelindungnya.
Di sekolah, menjadi sahabat Julia membuatnya menjadi salah satu gadis populer, dan sekarang Amy dijauhi.
Bersama Julia, Amy tidak membutuhkan orang lain lagi dan sekarang tanpa Julia, Amy tidak tahu harus bagaimana, ditambah lagi kematian Julia bagi Amy adalah tanggung jawabnya.

Berkat Laurie psikiaternya, Amy sadar bahwa Julia telah membuat pilihan dan Amy tidak bertanggung jawab pada pilihan-pilihan sahabatnya itu.
Amy juga akhirnya menyadari bahwa dia tidak hanya mencintai Julia, merindukan Julia tapi juga membenci, marah pada Julia karena telah meninggalkannya.
Setelah semua itu diketahuinya, jalan menuju 'kesembuhannya' terbuka, menjadikan Amy gadis yang utuh lagi.



I hated you for dying. For leaving. I hated you so much. I hated you almost as much as I hated myself. But I can look in the mirror now and face what I see. I’m even happy now, sometimes, and I can think of you and smile.
I won’t lie and say everything’s changed, though. I’m not a better person, a stronger one. I’m still me and I know what I did. Yeah, I wasn’t driving the car, and I see the choices you made now. I even see that I can’t make them mine, but I’ll always remember making sure you saw Kevin.
I’ll always remember taking your hand and telling you that everything would be okay.

Wherever I go, I’ll always see you. You’ll always be with me. And there’s no happy ending coming here, no way a story that started on a night that’s burned into my heart will end the way I wish it could. You’re really gone, no last words, and no matter how many letters I write to you, you’re never going to reply. You’re never going to say good-bye.
So I will.
Good-bye, Julia. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for being you.
Love, Amy

This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Suad Shamma.
681 reviews155 followers
November 23, 2012
This was an interesting book to read, and it reminded me a little bit of How To Save A Life by Sara Zarr. Obviously, the plot is completely different, but the protagonist not so much. The relationship with the parent(s) not so much. The relationship with friends not so much. And the loss of a loved one not so much.

Amy is a good person, a good person that's gone a little off-kilter, and was easily lead by a wild, independent, and autonomous character like Julia.

Love you Hate You Miss You is an emotional story about loss and grief. About blame and forgiveness. About moving on and finding a new path to tread on your own, now that the person you've relied on to lead you is gone for good.

Amy had to learn to make her own choices and how to live with and by them. With Julia out of the picture, she was forced to live her life in ways she wouldn't have been able to with Julia around, she was able to think back at moments and see them from a new (and sober) perspective. That being said, Julia wasn't the antagonist here. She wasn't the villain. She definitely wasn't a bad person. She was also a good person who made a whole lot of bad choices. Choices that eventually led to her sudden and premature death.

She was the best friend she knew how to be to Amy.

And when she was gone, Amy had to learn how to become a better friend to those around her. Caro, Mel and Patrick all played important roles that enabled Amy's recovery, as did her parents and Laurie - her therapist (I loved the pen clicking thing). Caro proves to be a better friend than Julia, Mel a good sport that helps bring Amy out of her shell, and Patrick her downfall. It was almost painful watching Patrick and Amy interact, but also gratifying.

This is a really good book, and I appreciate that the ending isn't a simple, 'happy' ending with the closure readers usually look for. However, I don't think it's a great book, or as good as Elizabeth Scott's other novels. It definitely isn't as good as Zarr's How To Save A Life. I guess I just kept reading and expecting more, I'm not sure what, and I really cannot put my finger on what it was I was looking for, but all I can say is...more. I needed more out of this novel, and I did not get it.

It was a very easy read, I finished it in one sitting. It wasn't extremely complicated, and it is brilliantly written for teens and young adults. I do love Scott's style of writing though, and her books are always books I am not able to put down. They will also always be books I pick up. I recommend reading Love You Hate You Miss You, but if you were making a choice between this novel and Stealing Heaven, then you should definitely go for the latter!
799 reviews134 followers
January 26, 2014
What's nice about three star reads is that the pages will turn, and the brain will be just the right amount of engaged, which I can't always say for 4-5 stars let alone the 1-2s. At the same time, however, three starts tend to hit the almost but not quite mark of book where I keep thinking, hey this is a nice idea, if only I could just edit this...
LYHYMY (dumb title but sort of works when you read the book) is about a teen named Amy who has just left rehab after being in an accident wherein her BFF Julia (the driver) was killed. The story is told in pieces, occasionally in letters to Julia and occasionally in Amy's head, as we start to understand the complexity of Amy and Julia's friendship as well as the struggle to move past feelings of guilt and shame.
While I applaud Scott for her characterization (Amy was pretty well sketched, Julia was excellent), what annoyed me was the following:
1 - Either make this all letters to J, or none - but the back and forth felt strange as both were in essence Amy's perspective. I get why you did it (see 2), but in reading it still felt awkward.
2 - Making Amy an unreliable narrator felt more and more contrived as the book went on. Amy is somehow supposed to be narrating a guy falling in love with her while also showing her total ignorance of this. It made for a real stretch for the reader and ultimately feeling that Amy is just really stupid. One of my professors often said, people don't sigh and people don't shrug - those are cheap cop outs that writers use as crutches. I never really got that until I read this book. How will I know that quiet, detached Patrick likes Amy, since Amy is supposed to not get it? Have his cupid friend Mel sigh and shrug a lot as he continuously throws them together.
3 - I liked that there were efforts towards complexity - Julia was not such a fantastic friend, Amy's parents are negligent - but this could have been much better done. I think having a blind eye towards a friend's fault is an excellent idea but in general it fell flat, and the parents just seemed way over the top. In addition, this book would have interested me a lot more if a drunk Amy had in fact caused the crash, but instead there was so much ambiguity that her ensuing guilt just felt really forced.
Overall this very much passed the time and was certainly, at least in effort, a cut above the usual YA.
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