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The Hitman's Guide to Making Friends and Finding Love

(The Hitman's Guide #1)

4.25  ·  Rating details ·  3,117 ratings  ·  610 reviews
What happens when a snarky hitman and a by-the-book PI cross paths?

Being a hitman has its perks, but I never thought getting an accidental mooning by an attractive PI while he’s caught on a fence would be one of them. While it’s not exactly love at first sight, he’s captured my interest and won’t let go.

Suddenly, I find myself caught in a game of cat and mouse
Kindle Edition, 375 pages
Published July 30th 2019
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Average rating 4.25  · 
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 ·  3,117 ratings  ·  610 reviews

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☆ Todd

OMG, this story had freaking EPIC, non-stop snark and banter!!!

I'd initially feared that in order to keep up the high levels of comedy, the author might need to resort to lowering the quality of the jokes, getting corny, and trying too hard, but that amazingly never happened. At least not for me.
“I haven’t called [the police] yet. I’m giving you one last day of freedom to do anything you want.”

“Ah, makes sense. Anything?”


“Can I touch your willy?”

“Besides that.”

“Can I look
Heather K (dentist in my spare time)
Was this supposed to be funny? Literally tested my last nerve (yes, my patience is thin these days...).

Lyn❤Loves❤Listening #AUDIOBOOKADDICT
DNF 8%

It's me, not the book. I like humor but not this kind of humor. It's just too OTT and silly.
Oct 09, 2020 rated it really liked it
Okay, now if you love humor that is so ridiculous and OTT, you'll love this series. If you can't handle silly humor, stay away. This one cracked me up. I'm okay with snarky-but stupid- humor. And, I loved the craziness involved. Weird and inappropriate humor is one of my things. I've was called "weird" when I was young, and now that I'm old I am called "eccentric", so I get it. (Eccentric sounds so much better, doesn't it? I guess if weirdos make it to old age we get that badge of honor.)

But if
Lorraine Lesar
Oct 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Insanity at it’s finest.

What you need to know....
Leland is a Hitman. A Hitman like no other. He is known in the business as The Sandman.
Jackson is a P.I. He’s known to The Sandman as Assman.
Both are trying to bring a head of a crime syndicate to justice - both having their own interruption on the definition of justice😉.

What you don’t need to know (but I’m going to tell you anyway)....
This was totally insane!
It’s the Marmite Book of all Marmite Books - you are going to either totally love it....o
h o l l i s
I have all of the love in the world for the buddy who rec'd this (not to me specifically but who enjoyed and did express warnings it was OTT and ridiculous) but this book was.. well..

I'll admit the beginning was kind of entertaining. Yes, OTT, and yes, ridiculous, but there were brief moments in the beginning where I amused -- in a 'so dumb I lol' way. But then there was the repetition, then the silly turned into what-the-fuckery, and just overall nothing was realistic or even fun anymore.

I skim
This book is similar in style and tone to the In Darkness books. While I adored the In Darkness series and found them to have characters with great chemistry and banter and a good balance between the funny and the action/mystery story, The Hitman's Guide didn't work quite as well for me in those aspects.

The story started off well, but started to drag towards the middle (and it's a pretty long book). While it was often funny, Leland's snark and commentary was pretty unrelenting and became exhaus

My gawd... I can't believe I've read all these 343 pages of.. Utterly nonsense, OTT behavior. Why, Why did I do that?


I thought this was supposed te be funny? Clearly I have a different kind of humor..

“What is wrong with you? And why the fuck can’t I get you off me? I can’t even move!”

He flails around some, which I think is really cute. Instead of giving in, I grab onto his earlobe with my lips and pull on it.

“I’ll suck your jackhammer.”

“No! Stop tempting me!”

Now he’s trying to crawl out
Audiobook: ***5 Michael-Ferraiuolo-is-the-best Stars***
Story: ***2 sorry-not-my-kind-of-humor Stars***
Oct 23, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Re-read 2nd - 22nd February 2021

Re-read 1st - 4th January 2020.

I promised myself a Christmas re-read. The problem is I do most of my reading in bed at night. And this is definitely a daytime book.
I can’t read this in bed because I can’t stop laughing. I thought it might be better the second time round. It’s not it’s worse. This time I was laughing from the get go.
Since I enjoyed this so much more the second time round I’m increasing my rating to 5*.

Original review - 4*

This is a perfect example
Oct 27, 2019 rated it liked it
I think whether you enjoy this book or not depends a lot on whether you can cope with Leland.

I found his sexual banter funny to start with, but it became ‘too much of the same’ pretty quickly. And then irritation set in. Never have I met a character as overbearing and annoying as him. Yes, he does have two or three more serious moments, but unfortunately, they remain underdeveloped. Shame because that’s exactly what I wanted to see!

What’s left is a supposedly cute guy who behaves inappropriately
Aug 25, 2019 rated it really liked it
Don't judge me. I laughed - more than once. This is American slapstick humor which often crosses the line into ridiculousness. What was it about this story that kept me so engaged?

I somehow formed an emotional connection to both characters. PI Jackson is an ex military 39 year old gay man. He didn't come out to his parents until his thirties. His mother is a horrible homophobic witch and I hated that he was so forgiving of her hatefulness. <--- see? Emotionally connected.

The Sandman♥️ (he signs
Mar 05, 2021 marked it as dnf

(nOW ThAt I tHInK Of It...PrObabLY EvERy SoCIoPaTH SAyS ThIS🥺😶😬)

Murderer:Soooo Mrin...I can see you😈I am coming after you
Mrin: You can see me??!!
Murderer: Yup!!!
Mrin: I will wave at you and you wave back!!!
Mrin:*Waves excitedly* I can see you as well!!!
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5 Overall Stars
😂😂😂😂😂/5 on the laugh level.
🔥🔥🔥/5 Heat Index

I’m still on a review hiatus. Not an official thing. Just can’t be bothered. But I will make an exception and write a longer one for this one sometime in the next few days. Because this book deserves a review with all the bells and whistles and quotes and gifs. And since I highlighted half of the darn book while reading it, I have plenty to use.

Put simply for now. This is my favorite book of the summer. I mean, Summer isn’t
Samantha Tucker
Aug 04, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Best comedic book this year

I almost died reading this book. I laughed so hard that I cried and then I laughed some more until I started coughing. I love books that make me laugh. This book over delivered. There was a great mix of action and angst that was offset perfectly by the hilarity. I texted my friend at least 4 times to tell her about the humor in this book. I'm usually not really into detective type books but the slow romantic buildup as well as the nonsensical jokes really made me love
4.25 stars.

I could never lose this man. I could never lose any of this. Without a doubt, I would give up everything for him.

I'm reading the second book in this series as I write this review and I can say hands down, that both these books have to be the funniest books I've read. I don't know how Alice did it. But she did, and I'm a fan.

Love the characters, the plot, the non stop banter. Especially the banter. This book had people look at me funny on my way to work and back home because I mi
Lelyana's Reviews

OMG I enjoyed this book too much! Especially every time Leland opened his mouth and talk! LOL.
And Jackson was definitely enjoying harassment after harassment from Leland.

Full review soon :)
Valerie ❈M/M Romance Junkie❈
I’ve started and stopped this book three times. I yield. When Michael F can’t make me listen to a book, it ain’t worth the struggle.☹️
Audio Review 07Jun2020: No Change

Well, this time around I probably wouldn't have given it the full 4 stars because, again, the immaturity was off the charts. But Michael did a great job with the narration so the rating stands.

Original Review 11Sep2019:

LOL funny stuff.

What kept it from 5 stars is that these MCs acted 10 years younger than their chronological ages. It was an odd disconnect that had they been late 20s and late teens (rather than late 30s and 20s as the book says they are) would ha
I absolutely loved every single second of this! Highly recommend. SO funny. Leland is AMAZING! New to me author and it's a winner! ...more
Dec 08, 2019 marked it as dnf
DNF at 40%

I recently read A Villain for Christmas by this author and loved it. I thought this would be just as funny as that one, even though I was a bit hesitant because lots of people have commented that they found Leland to be a bit too much at times.

So here I was expecting a super funny book, perhaps even a bit too ‘funny’. But if someone could send me a copy of that funny book, please do, because that wasn’t the copy I read.

I didn’t find this book funny at all. The way Leland and Jackson we

Ok, ROFL, Leland(27) was crazy and had so many absurd ideas, that made me laugh most of the time. Poor Jackson(39) had his hands full with this kinky and pushy bottom, but he wouldn't wish otherwise. There were many absurd scenes, things that in real life would never go that way, but the book was interesting, the chars charming and they gave me some good hours of relax.
Aug 20, 2020 rated it really liked it
"Because I’ve seen your butthole and that pretty much makes us BFFs.”
His face turns grave. “That’s… no.”
“What do you mean? I looked it right in the eye.”
He cringes. “That’s… no… just… no.”
“I think it even winked at me.”
“Oh my god. Get out of my car.”

It is cute when Jackson says "he regrets everything" but there are just empty words. He is happy more than he has ever been with Leland.
2 Stars

I thought this was going to be a new favorite. I really did. It started off perfectly with fantastic banter and a unique, quirky character. How could that have possibly gone wrong?


I realize I am in the minority here but I thought the non-stop banter and snark was too much and OTT. There was absolutely nothing realistic about this plot and every "serious" moment was unfailingly interrupted by pointless, weird banter and ramblings from Leland. I realize that he is most likely on the sp
Joyfully Jay
Jul 30, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: jay
A Joyfully Jay review.

4.5 stars

Alice Winters has a style that I just love and her stories mix humor, sweetness, and excitement in such nice balance. The Hitman’s Guide is another great example of this and I really just loved the way the humor and the heart combine here.

The story starts out delightful as Jackson and Leland are hunting the same man and Jackson accidentally finds himself mooning Leland (and no, Leland will never let him live that down). I think the pacing here is really well done
May 31, 2020 rated it really liked it
Hilarious. Over the top. Quirky.

Reviewed on May 31, 2020

Story: 4 stars
Performance: 5 stars
Overall: 4.25 stars

This is a fun, silly, OTT , soapy and sizzling hot AF story .

With zero angst and minimal amount of drama ; therefore, making it an ideal distraction, to current distressing world events.

I enjoyed and was entertained listening and reading The Hitman's Guide to making friends and finding love. Especially Leland's wacky shenanigans.

Michael Ferraiuolo narration was great! His comedic timing
Ridiculously Funny

This book was such a treat! It was extremely hilarious, dark, sexy, sweet and totally adorable. I didn’t try to see it in a realistic way, simply comedy and fun, and it delivered tenfold. Can’t wait to see what Leland and Jackson get up to in HG2!
Sep 24, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Good lord I loved this book... hilarious banter, lots of vulnerability and love and just pure joy. While it has zero realism, it has 100% fun & fiction. Leland made me smile ❤️
Mar 11, 2020 rated it it was ok
Shelves: kindle-unlimited, dnf
I was so excited to read this. Just wasn't my flavor of comedy. Very ridiculous plot and character actions. Put this aside with possibility of coming back to it but I haven't and won't at this point. Sigh. Might try again one day. Never know. ...more
Aug 13, 2019 rated it liked it
Tbh I feel like this book would’ve been soooo much better if it were shorter. The first like 30% of the book was absolutely great and I couldn’t stop laughing HOWEVER COMMA there’s too much comedic meandering in the plot line and it was honestly exhausting. The characters will start out talking about something serious, like a kidnapping, but then will spend the next like 10 pages talking about sex dolls or sex dungeons over and over and over and over and over again. If you’ve read this author’s ...more
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Alice Winters started writing stories as soon as she was old enough to turn her ideas into written words. She loves writing a variety of things from romance and comedy to action. She also enjoys reading, horseback riding, and spending time with her pets.

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Other books in the series

The Hitman's Guide (3 books)
  • The Hitman's Guide to Staying Alive Despite Past Mistakes (The Hitman's Guide #2)
  • The Hitman's Guide to Tying the Knot Without Getting Shot (The Hitman's Guide #3)

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