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Even If We Break

Marieke Nijkamp (Goodreads Author)

2.95 · Rating details · 3,804 ratings · 831 reviews

From #1 New York Times bestselling author Marieke Nijkamp comes a shocking new thriller about a group of friends tied together by a game and the deadly weekend that tears them apart.

FIVE friends go to a cabin.
FOUR of them are hiding secrets.
THREE years of history bind them.
TWO are doomed from the start.
ONE person wants to end this.
NO ONE IS SAFE.

Are you ready to pla

...more

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Hardcover, 336 pages

Published September 15th 2020 by Sourcebooks Fire

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Average rating 2.95 ·

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· 3,804 ratings · 831 reviews

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Mar 06, 2020 megs_bookrack rated it it was ok

Y'all, buckle up, it's gonna be a bumpy ride. Even If We Break was a huge disappointment for me.

I knew going in that the reviews weren't the greatest. Regardless of the super interesting synopsis, it seemed a lot of Readers weren't enjoying it, but why?

Frequently, I find myself in the minority opinion on polarizing books, so in spite of the negative reviews, I still wanted to give it a go.

I love slightly cheesy, Teen Slasher stories, particularly those featuring weekend getaways. This book sound ...more

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Oct 15, 2020 Cesar rated it did not like it · review of another edition

1 star.

I'm going to try and write this review in the nicest way possible though I have a feeling I'll fail because this book frustrated me to no end. Rarely are there books that frustrate and now Even If We Break Joins that list.

I can't describe this book. I can't describe it because it doesn't know what it wants to be. It wants to be slasher horror with character growth but it fails in so many ways that I don't even know why this book was written.

Get ready folks. Strap in and let's go for a ri ...more

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May 20, 2020 Nilufer Ozmekik rated it liked it

Oh, no! I hear the choo choo sounds of the disappointment train is about to arrive to the “this story is going anywhere” stop! Five friends in the cabin with secrets gave me “Cabin in the Woods’ vibes but promising premise and exciting start turned into something slow, repetitive, boring drama. And slowly all those brilliant potentials start to drown in a muddy place as my dreams about reading action packed, full of adrenalin rush thriller disappear forever!

I like the representation of transgend Oh, no! I hear the choo choo sounds of the disappointment train is about to arrive to the “this story is going anywhere” stop! Five friends in the cabin with secrets gave me “Cabin in the Woods’ vibes but promising premise and exciting start turned into something slow, repetitive, boring drama. And slowly all those brilliant potentials start to drown in a muddy place as my dreams about reading action packed, full of adrenalin rush thriller disappear forever!

I like the representation of transgender kids and five friends’ gathering together for playing a game before parting ways is a promising idea to start a story. Finn got into a fight caused him walking with crutches and ending his friendship with Liva. And now they’re in the same group, barely looking each other’s faces. Ever suffers from guilt feelings because of burden of the secret he carries and Carter starts being paranoid because as soon as they reach the cottage where they perform their role-plays, finds notes about his secret left in his room. And Maddy is still traumatized, suffering from PTSD because of trapped in her burning car after her accident.

I actually didn’t expect their game would be a role-play, wearing costumes, investigating a murder mystery for visual universe. But I was still invested and kept on reading and second half of the book turns into some kind of teenager drama: instead of slow-building high tension thriller, the characters start to make long talks about their feelings and regrets so I felt like I was reading a never ending therapy session.

The conclusion of the story is not bad but I find it unrealistic and a little illogical. It didn’t fit my expectations. So I’m giving three stars only because of the smart plot, likable characters but in my opinion the second half of the book should be rewritten. The ultra- slowed down paced and story’s changing direction disappointed me. It was great start but it could be so much better.

Special thanks to NetGalley and Sourcebooks Fire for sharing this intriguing ARC with me in exchange my honest review. ...more

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Sep 14, 2020 Books R Life ☕ rated it really liked it

Shelves: won-in-a-givaway

I recieved this book from a GoodReads giveaway! I really enjoyed reading this! The beginning was a little slow going at first, but ended up picking up not to long into it. Each chapter is about one of the characters. And each character has experience something that has made their friendships change within the group. They have always spent their summers togeather in the family cabin☠this year is their last.... And definitely the Scariest!! ☠ recommend if your into suspense!! Great Halloween/ Fall ...more

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Oct 01, 2020 Kelly rated it it was ok

Even if we break was disappointing. I was hoping for a gripping mystery/thriller but unfortunately, I never managed to connect to the characters even though it had good representation (queer & autistic characters). I also never connected with the plot which confused me at first when I saw that their "game" was actually role play. I thought why not, and I tried to get into the book but sadly, it left me a little bored and lost.

I was wondering for a while if someone really died or if it was part ...more

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Sep 04, 2020 Dennis rated it liked it

To be honest, this wasn’t my favorite. However, I did really enjoy the social dialogue and issues presented with some of the main characters. The diversity in this book has allowed me to up my rating from 2 to 3 stars. Definitely a very YA vibe so if you battle on some YA books, maybe skip this one. This one is definitely more middle grade focused (in my opinion).

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Apr 11, 2021 Ezzy rated it it was amazing

Shelves: favorites

EDIT: I decided to write a more cohesive post about passive and unintentional ableism in readers and what is wrong with saying things like ''The diversity/representation is the only good thing in the book.'' followed by calling the passages about trauma recollection ''annoying'' and an overstimulated autistic character ''whiny''.
EDIT: Worded the below review a bit better.
_____

This book was amazing! I really love how the disability, mental illness, trauma and transness of the characters is inter ...more

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Oct 03, 2020 Anniek rated it really liked it

Shelves: 1-2020-releases, lgbtq, trans-mc, 2-ya, autistic, non-binary-mc, disabled, 3-mystery-thriller

I started this book last night, then stayed up to finish it, because I absolutely needed to know how it would end. And admittedly, it was pretty scary at times, although I'll be the first to admit I'm easily spooked. It was a very fun thriller, especially because I loved the characters, and I loved the RPG aspect and how it was weaved into the story. I will say I figured out who did it immediately, which was a bit of a shame to me, but I still had a really good time reading this.

Most importantly ...more

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Oct 03, 2020 Angela Staudt rated it liked it

"As I catch my breath, I glance around at the group. We're a collection of individuals, all of us broken, all of us fragile. But the thing that scares me the most isn't that I might break us apart farther. It's that I want to."

Even If We Break follows five people who used to be best friends and now barely hang out. They get together one last time at a cabin buried deep in the woods, because they will be graduating and going their separate ways soon. Going into this book I thought it was going to "As I catch my breath, I glance around at the group. We're a collection of individuals, all of us broken, all of us fragile. But the thing that scares me the most isn't that I might break us apart farther. It's that I want to."

Even If We Break follows five people who used to be best friends and now barely hang out. They get together one last time at a cabin buried deep in the woods, because they will be graduating and going their separate ways soon. Going into this book I thought it was going to be a top-notch thriller because these kids are going to a cabin in the woods. I mean that screams something bad is going to happen. I was a little thrown off because these five friends get together to play a role-playing game. They all dress up and their goal is to figure out who the killer is in this game they play.

While I wasn’t expecting the role-playing, I still found this to be a fast-paced book and once I started reading I couldn’t stop. I really enjoyed how this legitimately got creepy and gave me chills when one by one things start happening to the characters. I actually got quite scared at certain points and was like what is even going on? I did also really enjoy that this was more than just a thriller. All of the characters, who we each get their perspective, are struggling with something in their life. Whoever is messing with them in the cabin, knows each of their secrets and uses it against them. I do have to admit it got a little slow in some parts, because in the middle of an action-packed scene, the characters would talk about their feelings. I understand that they are overcoming why they aren’t friends anymore and how to overcome their own demons, but in the middle of them being hunted I don’t think is the best time to dive into feelings.

I would have given this book a higher rating if it wasn’t for the ending. First off, right from the beginning I guessed who the killer was. I kept thinking no way, there must be a twist coming because that is way too easy. No twist happened and it was exactly who I thought it was, which is always a bummer for me. Also, the ending was very unbelievable and not realistic. What happened throughout this book was gripping, but finding out who the killer is just didn’t fit with the things that were done. I really think this book had amazing potential and going into this book, the first half I was like this is a strange, but really an amazing thriller. That last half just seemed really unbelievable and lost my interest.

Thank you to SourceBooks Fire and Early Reads for a free finished copy in exchange for an honest review. ...more

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Oct 02, 2020 Beth added it

Shelves: lgbtqa, book-subscritpions, nope, mystery-thriller

This was a DNF at page 88.

Firstly I want to say that I am pretty sure it’s me and not the book because I went in with completely different expectations so when it wasn’t what I thought it completely threw me off.

The book itself has a lot of representation which is always good to see and I was intrigued to see what the characters secrets were, however to the point where I was I just want interested enough. It’s not like I’ve got to a point where it’s hard to DNF because it wasn’t.

Once again it’s ...more

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Apr 20, 2020 Mara YA Mood Reader marked it as to-read

Shelves: autumn-reads-halloween, 2020-new-releases

Yaasss bring on the creep factor just in time for Fall!!

4/20/2020 ...more

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Sep 02, 2020 iam rated it it was amazing

Shelves: lgbtqia, ownvoices, nonbinary-genderqueer-fluid, arc, horror-vibes, transgender, disability-mental-health

Absolutely terrifying horror thriller about five roleplaying friends going to a haunted cabin, that shines through its queer and disabled representation.

Read the full review on the blog!

Content warnings include: murder, character death, graphic violence and injury, emotional torture, ableism, addiction to painkillers, transphobia.
Mentions of car accident, getting beaten up, poverty.

Even If We Break immediately scores with its heavy atmosphere from page one onwards. Even without the actual horror ...more

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Oct 23, 2020 Kristy rated it it was ok

Shelves: a-real-book-wow, hardcopy-from-pub

This book completely excels in trans, non-binary, and neurodivergent rep. Major kudos there. The plot, though? A total mess. Full review to come. Thanks to Sourcebooks Early Reads for my copy.

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Dec 01, 2020 Drew's ambitious reading rated it really liked it

Shelves: tbr-shelf, hardcover, 2020-reads, library-books, new-releases, buddy-reads, audiobook, thriller, fall-tbr-2020

First book for December is finished and we are kicking the month off with a ya thriller and a 4 star read! RTC SOON!(:

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Jun 14, 2020 Alex Nonymous rated it liked it

Shelves: 7-8-and-9

Thanks to the publisher for providing a digital ARC of Even If We Break in exchange for an honest review.

I'm a self proclaimed horror junky. I used to pride myself on having read every single goosebumps book (published pre 2013), I grew up on scooby doo, then goosebumps, then are you afraid of the dark and the haunting hour and now I watch and read every horror story I can get my hands on. Even If We Break is not a horror story.

Even in kids horror, one of the most important aspects of a scary st Thanks to the publisher for providing a digital ARC of Even If We Break in exchange for an honest review.

I'm a self proclaimed horror junky. I used to pride myself on having read every single goosebumps book (published pre 2013), I grew up on scooby doo, then goosebumps, then are you afraid of the dark and the haunting hour and now I watch and read every horror story I can get my hands on. Even If We Break is not a horror story.

Even in kids horror, one of the most important aspects of a scary story is anticipation. It's why monsters usually don't get screen time until the third act. Even if We Break has all of its 'horror' packed into the same few middle chapters and once it happens, tension’s lost. The set up was really cool. A splintered friend group going to a cabin to play a murder mystery themed RPG? Incredible. But then there's a whole lot of "I see a shadow" before an actual threat is introduced to make the shadows add tension before two back to back killings. Our group is a group of 5 kids and by not spacing out the deaths, it ruined a lot of the tension the book could have built (especially considering the first one happens 'off screen'. Not showing a body adds to the fear of uncertainty but then a few pages later the book goes 'here's a body' and ruins it).

This is shelved as a mystery/ thriller though, so is it a mystery? Again, I don't really think so. The moment the first murder happens, you know who it is because of things I won't discuss for obvious spoilers. This book really only has 6 suspects, the 5 players and their one missing member and once two characters are gone, it's hard not to know exactly who did it. I loved how diverse this book is and saw a few reviews saying having a neurodivergent character, an enby character, and a trans character in the same group of 5 was unrealistic but I don't believe that's the case. That being said, a book claiming to highlight this diversity is extremely unlikely to have on of their diverse characters be a secret sociopath so since the story also has such a small cast, it was hindered from the get go.

Even though I knew who the murderer was going to be, the twist STILL felt ludicrous. I'd had most of the book to try and wrap my head around a motive and while they (I use the anonymous they here, I'm not confirming or denying that the only character in this book who uses they/them pronouns is the murderer) technically reveal it, it still felt way too out of left-field to be buyable.

Scary stories stay with you because of their believability. We abandon fears of monsters and boogeymen when we become sure they don't really exist. Realistic set scary stories need believable antagonists more than they need super developed heroes because a murderer who you could realistically imagine in the real world is terrifying. Even if We Break has a lot of really fleshed out characters and character dynamics, but falls short on its villain and ultimately suffers for it. ...more

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Oct 08, 2020 Alaina rated it it was ok

Shelves: contemporary, 2020-ng, books-i-own, thriller, lgbtqa, audiobook, horror, fiction, young-adult, mystery

...what did I just read?

Even If We Break almost broke me. The beginning honestly sounded pretty cool, and so did the synopsis, but I was just so bored with everything that was happening. Also, the whole game thing is still weird and creepy to me. SO yeah, don't put me down for that game EVER.

In this, 5 friends are going to a cabin to play a game or whatever. At first, I thought it was like roleplaying something like dungeons and dragons. I honestly didn't know what I was getting into and once I ...more

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Aug 21, 2020 Izzie rated it really liked it

Shelves: queer-books-i-ve-read

Thank you to Source Books for sending me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
This book follows a group of 5 best friends who head up to a remote cabin for the weekend to play one last game in their invented role play world. Relationships are already fractured, but when mysterious notes start turning up and one of them goes missing it quickly spirals into a dark game for survival that none of them could have anticipated.
What I Liked:
Characters. This book had 5 POV characters, Ever, Finn, L Thank you to Source Books for sending me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
This book follows a group of 5 best friends who head up to a remote cabin for the weekend to play one last game in their invented role play world. Relationships are already fractured, but when mysterious notes start turning up and one of them goes missing it quickly spirals into a dark game for survival that none of them could have anticipated.
What I Liked:
Characters. This book had 5 POV characters, Ever, Finn, Liva, Carter and Maddy, each of them with their own secrets and flaws. I really liked the relationships between the characters as there was such a range of different dynamics. I especially enjoyed the bond between Finn and Ever as they had so much history and truly cared for each other. Representation in this book was refreshing as so many identities were depicted. Ever was non-binary, Finn was trans and had arthritis, and Maddy was autistic and suffered chronic pain. I especially appreciated the chronic pain and chronic illness representation, as it felt authentic to my own experience as the author made it clear that pain and restricted mobility affected almost everything they did. I could tell this was own voices representation as it was handled with such care and knowledge.
Atmosphere. The remote cabin setting was a great choice as it immediately created a spooky and isolated atmosphere. The author did a great job keeping up the suspense throughout the story and it kept me on the edge of my seat. The addition of anonymous notes and the constant suggestion that they were being watched was very effective.
What I Didn't Like:
The End. Although the "reveal" wasn't overly shocking it didn't disappoint me. However, the last 10 percent of the book was very repetitive. Although I liked the message it was frustrating because it felt very drawn out.
Overall, this was an engaging and exciting page turner of a thriller. It had great characters and interesting relationships as well as an atmospheric and well crafted plot. ...more

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Jan 14, 2021 Sharon :) rated it really liked it

This could have been a 5 but it left me with alot of unanswered questions

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Nov 07, 2020 Samantha rated it it was ok

This was a good lesson in the value of paying attention to the reviews from your Goodreads community, even if they are unfavorable but the synopsis sounds good.

Nijkamp had a great premise here, and parts of the book were successful (more on that in a moment), but on the whole, the book is a big letdown.

There is some heavy, heavy angst going on with all of these characters, and it is painful and frankly kind of irritating to read. Do we want our protagonists to fight to overcome hardships throu This was a good lesson in the value of paying attention to the reviews from your Goodreads community, even if they are unfavorable but the synopsis sounds good.

Nijkamp had a great premise here, and parts of the book were successful (more on that in a moment), but on the whole, the book is a big letdown.

There is some heavy, heavy angst going on with all of these characters, and it is painful and frankly kind of irritating to read. Do we want our protagonists to fight to overcome hardships throughout a narrative? Of course. Do we want them all crushingly depressed and despairing for 90% of the book? I certainly don’t. The fact that they all perk up a bit at the end isn’t helpful. The oppressive misery of every single character in the group didn’t feel authentic or necessary. It just felt melodramatic.

I probably could have gotten past all that if this had been a great story. But alas, that too failed in the end.

One of the good things about this book was that there was a point around the middle of the novel where the atmosphere/creepiness factor got really, really good. But the solve...yikes. While I do think Nijkamp picked the right villain (predictable though it was), she unfortunately also chose the wrong motive (or lack thereof), and it destroyed the narrative completely.

It was also kind of obnoxious to hear three of the protagonists—when preparing to confront the villain—righteously talking about how they “don’t want to resort to violence.”

I understand there is a segment of YA readership that likes this nicey-nice stuff, but let’s keep it out of the murder mysteries, yes? This person murdered your friend (while you were in the middle of a semi-violent RPG I might add), and your plan is to throw a blanket over their head to disorient them so you don’t have to throw a punch? I hope I never find myself in a foxhole with any of you.

On a more positive note, I thought Nijkamp handled diversifying her cast well. Both the trans and the neurodivergent character felt well-rendered. I really appreciate that she didn’t just throw them in as tokens, nor did she make their entire identity about being trans or neurodivergent. Definitely some points awarded back for this, and a real bright spot in an otherwise disappointing story.

...more

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Jan 18, 2022 Jenn rated it it was ok

Shelves: contemporary, high-school-days, read-in-2022, new-author-to-me, thriller, 2-star-reads, who-to-trust, young-adult, teens-behaving-badly

Well... I really wanted to like this book. Right off the bat, it had three things going for it:

- Full of diverse characters: trans-rep, nonbinary-rep and disability-rep - and I freaking loved all of the representation here.
- cabin in the woods slasher horror
- spotlight on nerdness - let your nerd flag fly!

But sadly, that's where the positives end. This book was ... awkward. This group of teens who were once really close decide to have one last hurah together but no one really wants to be there a ...more

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Sep 22, 2020 Debbie rated it it was amazing

This is the first book I have read by this author and definitely won't be my last! I can't wait to read Before I Let Go! Things I loved about the book: the setting (cabin in the mountain/woods) I love books and movies with that setting! So spooky! It gets scary pretty quickly after they arrive at the cabin, diversity, that there are five POV so we get to know what everyone is thinking and feeling, there is a ghost story thrown in so you don't know if it is a ghost or one of them that is doing ev ...more

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Dec 16, 2020 Elizabeth Aguilar rated it did not like it

I received an eARC from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

Trigger warnings: murder, death, addiction

Representation: trans POV characters, bisexual POV character, autistic POV character, chronic pain, disabled POV character

I honestly don't know how to rate it. It's a 1 or 2 star read. While this book has a variety of representation, the execution is lacking. The transitions between monologues, flashbacks, RPG, and the mystery/thriller elements are awkward. While I have empathy for some o ...more

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Oct 19, 2020 PinkAmy loves books, cats and naps rated it did not like it · review of another edition

I’ve enjoyed book I read from this writer less than the one before. After a stellar debut, it’s time we part ways.

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Jan 01, 2022 Crystal rated it liked it

Five friends are brought together by their mutual love of a fantasy-based RPG—Gonfalon. Together, they’ve created an immersive world full of magic, murder and mystery.
RPGs are a great form of escapism, and everyone in this group is trying to escape something. Unfortunately, the game that once brought them together is now tearing them apart. They decide to meet up one last time to try and salvage what’s left of their friendship.
But what happens when you develop too much dependency on escapism? O Five friends are brought together by their mutual love of a fantasy-based RPG—Gonfalon. Together, they’ve created an immersive world full of magic, murder and mystery.
RPGs are a great form of escapism, and everyone in this group is trying to escape something. Unfortunately, the game that once brought them together is now tearing them apart. They decide to meet up one last time to try and salvage what’s left of their friendship.
But what happens when you develop too much dependency on escapism? One member of this group doesn’t want the game to end and is going to do whatever it takes to make sure it doesn’t.

I understand the ratings of the book being low because of the RPG aspect. If you don’t participate in (or have a fundamental understanding of) RPGs, you’re probably not going to enjoy this book. The synopsis should have made it clearer what this book was about, but it didn’t.
I’ll admit it: I’m a huge nerd who loves RPGs and LARPing. Because of that, I really enjoyed the gaming and fantasy aspects of the story. I particularly enjoyed it when the game started bleeding into the real world and lines between fantasy and reality blurred. So good! It reminded me of the 1982 movie Mazes and Monsters.

I also appreciate the autism and trans representation, especially regarding the bullying and relationship issues these particular minority groups face. That being said, Maddy and Finn are the only two characters that were well fleshed out. The other three were one dimensional and they’re motivations weren’t clear. More character development for them would have made the story more impactful.

That isn’t the only problem.
The reasoning behind why the friends drifted apart is kind of vague. We get a few hints along the way, but nothing is fleshed out. Likewise, the killer’s motives are super vague and don’t make a lot of sense. And (this is totally a me problem) I didn’t like the syrupy sweet ending. It went on for too long, was overly sentimental and could’ve been shaved down to add more depth to the actual story. (Just my opinion of course. Some might like it as is).

Overall, while this book did have some issues, I still enjoyed it and would read more by this author. ...more

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Aug 27, 2020 Pavitra (For The Love of Fictional Worlds) rated it it was ok

Disclaimer: An eARC was provided via the Publisher and Netgalleyin exchange for an honest review. The Thoughts, opinions & feelings expressed in the review are therefore, my own.

Actual Rating 2.75 Stars

Oh dear, I really had such high expectations from this horror mystery – but it failed to leave a mark on me.

Five friends; from different walks of lives who have had only one thing in common – a RPG that they all immerse themselves in; come together to play one last game, before they all move on with their lives. Once best friends, recent events have led their friendships to be fractured to a point that none of them believe could be repaired, but they aren’t willing to give up either.

First, let me just say, the representation of transgender as well as non – binary kids with a role playing game set in a cabin in the woods that has its own haunting tales is sort of the PERFECT setting for a weekend of macabre and horror – and it does work; but only up to a certain part.

Even If We Break worked like a charm to hold my attention for a while – we get multiple PoVs as well as the history amongst these friends and the scintillating peeks into the secrets they all have – and when things start going wrong with their RPG, it had me at the edge of the seat, not just with excitement but with horror as well.

But that’s exactly when thing started to go wrong; for the book and for the reader as well – because it didn’t take a genius to figure EXACTLY who the perpetrator was and every plot twist hence started going downhill , since it got boring – and last, but definitely not the least; there is absolutely no closure at the end of the book – okay, I get that the characters were supposed to grow and mature; but the where does the consequence come into play her? Let me tell you, I need closure when it comes to standalones okay – so an epilogue would have been appreciated it; actually no it was expected.

A great foundation and start to a horror mystery/thriller, that fell short of expectations.

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May 21, 2020 Audrey rated it liked it

Shelves: arc, 2020, alright

I'm torn.
This is the second book I've read by Marieke Nijkamp, and there were some things I enjoyed. Ahem:
1) It was definitely a thriller and I'm usually hard-pressed to find a thriller that doesn't keep me turning the pages
2) It's use of RPGs as the backdrop for the plot and the friendship was really interesting and well done; I hadn't seen a book that used that before. I'm not super familiar with that world, but it seemed very well-researched. And finally:
3) The diversity?
This is where thi I'm torn.
This is the second book I've read by Marieke Nijkamp, and there were some things I enjoyed. Ahem:
1) It was definitely a thriller and I'm usually hard-pressed to find a thriller that doesn't keep me turning the pages
2) It's use of RPGs as the backdrop for the plot and the friendship was really interesting and well done; I hadn't seen a book that used that before. I'm not super familiar with that world, but it seemed very well-researched. And finally:
3) The diversity?
This is where this book gets hard to review for me. I really admire the work that Nijkamp does in promoting diverse books and calling for greater representation in YA. It just felt a little forced? I don't know how to explain it. I was thrilled to see representation in this book that I've literally never read in fiction before. And I appreciated that a character could have a disability, or not be neurotypical, or not be cisgender, and not have that be the only aspect of their personality. But the fact that there were soooo many of these aspects for such a small cast of characters, and many of them really weren't explored at all, it almost felt like they were just tossed in there, and didn't give any legitimate representation to the experience.
There was a comment early on in the book about how the characters were considering adding another member to their friend group because they were collectively too white. It just started to give me the vibe that this was diversity for the sake of getting diversity points.
This kind of plays into my overall problem with the book. It just lacks subtlety. Everything was extremely cut and dry; the characters almost felt like caricatures. They would go on paragraph long rants explicitly outlining their struggles, or what they're feeling, or how they believe things should be. I felt like I was just being handed morals.
The mystery element also was kind of lacking. Sure, there definitely was a mystery, but the reader isn't really given many opportunities to solve it. There is one solution that is foreshadowed so obviously throughout the beginning of the book that you realize it CAN't be that one, and the true solution just comes out of nowhere, with very little explanation for how it could've even been possible.
I do appreciate this book for what it did do well. It was fast-paced and easy, which is what I was hoping for. And it did give lots of important representation. I just feel like it could've been executed better. This is pretty similar to how I felt about Nijkamp's debut, as well. The ratings of her three books have been pretty consistent across Goodreads, so I'm wondering if her writing just isn't for me. However, if you're looking for a fast-paced story with some rep and RPG references, it's worth a shot. ...more

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Jan 21, 2022 Carrie (brightbeautifulthings) rated it really liked it

Shelves: underrated, murdery-thrillery, ya-realism

Five friends go to a cabin for the weekend for their last game of live-action role playing. As difficult is it is for them to let go of the world they’ve created, most of them are moving on after high school, and there are already fracture lines in the group. All of them have secrets, and somebody seems bent on making the game more real than it’s ever been, with deadly consequences. Trigger warnings: character death (graphic, on page), car accident, suicidal ideation, severe injury, addiction, b Five friends go to a cabin for the weekend for their last game of live-action role playing. As difficult is it is for them to let go of the world they’ve created, most of them are moving on after high school, and there are already fracture lines in the group. All of them have secrets, and somebody seems bent on making the game more real than it’s ever been, with deadly consequences. Trigger warnings: character death (graphic, on page), car accident, suicidal ideation, severe injury, addiction, blood, transphobia and ableism of all kinds from the villain, bullying.

I was wondering why I’d never heard anything about this book and a little disappointed the book community had been sleeping on it, but then I saw all the negative reviews. Can’t say I agree with the majority on this one. I really enjoyed Even If We Break, and it’s one of my favorite YA thrillers I’ve read lately. While I wished the ‘trapped in the house’ aspect of the book had gone on for longer, there are some moments of genuine fright, and it isn’t often a thriller makes me go, “Oh, SHIT, that was creepy.” (Direct quote. 😂) The killer is fairly obvious, which isn’t great if you like more surprises in your fiction, but I prefer plots that favor logic over shock.

Admittedly, the premise of this novel is a bit niche with the live-action role playing. It’s one of those polarizing hobbies where you either really get it or you really don’t. I’m a role player from way back though (although I’ve never live-played; looks fun, but I’m a writer, not an actress), and it was easy for me to bond with the characters over their player personas and their love for this world they’ve created. How creepy when it suddenly becomes more real than they ever intended.

The representation is also A+. Finn is trans and disabled, and he was easily my favorite character, distrustful and tough but soft on the inside. His disability plays a major role in the novel and is never sidelined when it’s not convenient. There’s also a nonbinary main character who struggles with poverty and an autistic, disabled character fighting addiction. The friendships are a bit shaky, given that everyone is about to go their separate ways, but it works for the purposes of the novel. (Can you really trust each other once bodies start dropping?) I especially liked the bond between Finn and Ever. The book doesn’t shirk from a body count, and while there aren’t a lot of surprises to be had at the end, I was satisfied with how it turned out.

I review regularly at brightbeautifulthings.tumblr.com. ...more

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Dec 09, 2020 Flavia rated it really liked it

A copy of this book was kindly provided by Raincoast Books in exchange for an honest review.

I don’t read thrillers books as often as I would like. So, I was pretty excited to read Even if We Break! I’ve also been wanting to pick up one of Marieke Nijkamp’s books for a while, so this just added to my excitement.

I started reading and got pulled right in–and I think part of it is that Nijkamp started the narrative with the characters already on their way to the cottage at which most of the action i ...more

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Sep 04, 2021 Sarah Hernandez rated it it was ok

this book had an interesting premise, but it didn’t deliver for me.

there were a lot of characters in this book, and they kinda ran together in my head😂 in the beginning, i thought that every character had a really big secret that would get revealed, and they didn’t? that was a let down for me, especially because i felt
that it could’ve been a better motivator for the killer if the other had betrayed them, but no. the killer’s motivation ended up feeling very weak to me. i had a hard time caring ...more

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May 01, 2020 Rachel rated it it was ok

*UPDATE*

I was seriously disappointed with both the lack of plot in this book, and the writing style of the author. Yes, this author does an amazing job at creating elaborate RPG and jump-scare situations, and she gives a much-needed voice to the LGBTQ+ and mental health awareness communities...but with no plotline, it makes me feel like the only reasons for reading this are to support the aforementioned communities as well as be delightfully chilled by the jump scares. When I read a book, I go i ...more

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About Marieke Nijkamp

Marieke Nijkamp

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Marieke Nijkamp a storyteller, dreamer, globe-trotter, geek.

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Please note I don't respond to friend requests or messages on GR, but you're always welcome to tweet or email me. :) ...more

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Quotes from Even If We Break

“It’s not giving up. It’s standing together, not alone. It’s facing whatever comes next. Because you believe in a cause, perhaps, but most of all, you believe in one another.” — 2 likes

“Some sounds can break through everything:
Silence.
Tension.
Night.
Imagination.” — 1 likes

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