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Squeeze Me

(Skink #8)

4.10  ·  Rating details ·  13,390 ratings  ·  2,088 reviews
From the best-selling author of Skinny Dip and Razor Girl, a new novel that captures the Trump era with Hiaasen's inimitable savage humor and wonderful, eccentric characters. A surefire best seller.

Carl Hiaasen's Squeeze Me is set among the landed gentry of Palm Beach. A prominent high-society matron--who happens to be a fierce supporter of the President and founding membe
Kindle Edition, 353 pages
Published September 29th 2020 by Knopf (first published August 25th 2020)
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Susan Of course! It takes place in Palm Beach, FL in 2020 and is very funny. I consider it the best satire of this year. It's a must-read for anyone - - wit…moreOf course! It takes place in Palm Beach, FL in 2020 and is very funny. I consider it the best satire of this year. It's a must-read for anyone - - with humor about politics.(less)

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Average rating 4.10  · 
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 ·  13,390 ratings  ·  2,088 reviews

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Carl Hiaasen returns us to the madness of Florida, in a deranged, irreverent and funny social and political satire featuring the imbecilic Orange one with his gerbil like attention span and his first lady, referred to here by their secret service names of Mastodon and Mockingbird. It is the height of the exclusive Palm Beach charity ball season that so many of the country's wealthy arrive for, with the Casa Bellicosa close by, the Winter White House. Kiki Pew Fitzsimmons is a prominent member of ...more
I don’t think I knew how much I needed this book until I started reading. Yes, it’s based in our current reality but Hiaasen has a gift for stretching that reality to ridiculous lengths until you reach a place where you can only look up & laugh. However, fair warning to fans of the Orange One & his posse….you may not find this quite so amusing.

In fact, supporters of those who suffer from inherited wealth, political ambition or general pretension may have trouble locating their funny bone. It’s d
Dec 26, 2020 rated it really liked it
Shelves: edelweiss
Carl Hiaasen delivers a clever, humorous novel that’s going to leave you shaking your head saying “Oh no, tell me he didn’t just go there!?” Oh yes friends, he did! And lucky you were along for the ride!

When Kiki Fitzsimmons disappears from a charity ball at the country club in S. Florida, the search is on! After all, she couldn’t and wouldn’t have simply walked away.

Well, leave it to the twisted mind of Carl Hiaasen to take her disappearance to the next level! While your detective skills may
Sep 05, 2020 rated it did not like it
Sad to say that it appears Mr. Hiaasen has lost his ability to provide good humor in his novels. A philandering President, a twenty foot long snake and a dallying first lady provides few chuckles. 2 of 10 stars
Aug 26, 2020 rated it really liked it
Hilarious, absurd, and hysterical, this was a well-plotted and bizarre crime thriller with an abundance of black humour and silliness. The main characters were quirky, colourful, and brilliantly portrayed. 4.5 stars!

A central character is the American President, known to the secret service as Mastodon. This portrayal may seem to some as too outrageous to be credible even as satire. He is vile, uncultured, hates immigrants who become his targets for blame and lies, spends time ranting and raging
Kasa Cotugno
So this is Carl Hiaasen's take on the current administration. The leader of the free world, referred to only by his code name of Mastodon (pleased to learn of the animal's extreme size and strength, he asked for a visit to the zoo to see a herd of his namesakes, probably just after requesting an audience with Frederick Douglass), firestorms tweets, spends much time in his custom- built tanning bed, and clomps around his Palm Beach compound (here, Casa Bellicosa). Treated more humanely is the cur ...more
Oct 14, 2020 rated it really liked it
Shelves: library, audio
Carl Hiaasen is always good for a laugh. And this book is no exception. Kiki Pew Fitsimmons is a Palm Beach dowager, a member of the POTUS Pussies. She also happens to have gone missing during a fundraising gala for IBS. In typical Hiaasen fashion, the plot rolls out in hysterical fashion with multiple threads that will keep your head spinning. He excels at clever names and descriptions which always seem to hit the mark.
Hiaasen has a list of those he hates, first and foremost being our idiot pr
John Martin
Dec 01, 2020 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I've long thought Donald Trump must have strayed from the pages on a funny Carl Hiassen novel. No-one else could invent a character as outrageous as him, right?
I am pleased to say even if I were wrong, I was right.
Trump fits seamlessly into his part in Squeeze Me. He's never actually named as such, but we are let in no doubt it's really him.
Hiassen has always done satire well.
On one level, this is a skilfully-written entertaining and funny story.
On another level, it's a savage barb.
I can't wait
Sep 02, 2020 rated it did not like it
Disappointing. Really enjoyed other Hiaasen books, but found this to be too mean spirited toward a President he obviously hates. His overwhelming disdain for Trump caused him to lose the humor normally associated with his other works. It is one thing to poke fun and totally another to have a running hateful diatribe through out.
Sep 10, 2020 rated it did not like it
This is a smelly piece of week old roadkill python.
Glae R. Egoville
Sep 01, 2020 rated it did not like it
Too many children's books

I used to like Hiaasen's writing. He wrote funny, snarky and loony. This awful book was his two cents about the current President. It wasn't even good satire. It was childish and stupid. Every time a well known writer weighs in with their political opinions I sense a big publishing company hovering. Carl should go back to writing kid's books at least they require some restraint.
Bill Mcgrath
Sep 05, 2020 rated it did not like it
Should have been titled, "I hate all conservative republicans." First let me say that I have read ALL of Carl Hiaasen's books, as well as the young adult titles to my kids. He along with Dorsey were my favorite authors. Now I know that Hiaasen is a democrat, but I read these books as an escape from all the political crap that's out there now. Kind of like how it's hard to watch sports and ESPN because sports are far from the main focus anymore. I couldn't even finish this book and it seemed like ...more
Sep 12, 2020 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: humor
Hilarious, at a time when most everyone needs a laugh. An elderly Palm Beach socialite has too much to drink at a fancy resort, and disappears along with her killer. The book moves back and forth between some lowlife criminals hired to hide evidence, an animal capture/control specialist, the Potussies, and the President's and First Lady's antics in the Winter White House. Referred to mostly in their Secret Service monikers (Mastodon and Mockingbird), they are both pilloried by Hiassen: a bird ne ...more
Jun 14, 2020 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
To me Carl Hiaasen's novels sometimes get so tangled up in their own hijinks that they run out of steam before I can finish.

Not so "Squeeze Me," which is clever and nutty, and sustains its premise through to the end. Of course, it takes place in the Florida of the president known to his Secret Service as Mastodon, and the Flotus known as Magpie (you will believe the stories about her re-negotiating her prenup before moving into the White House after you read this).

Angela Armstrong is a wildlife
Jun 15, 2020 rated it really liked it
Angie runs her own business, Discreet Captures, in Palm Beach, FL where she traps and relocates wildlife. She receives a call from the caretaker of a local estate about a giant python and manages to remove the snake without offending party guests. But what happened to Kiki Pew, the wealthy hostess who seems to have vanished from the event? Her posse of frequently-intoxicated elderly socialites demands to know. Could an evil foreigner be responsible for Kiki’s disappearance, as the POTUS claims? ...more
Fred Forbes
Sep 13, 2020 rated it it was amazing
OK, Carl Hiaasen (of the newspaper and publishing Hiasasens) finally lets loose with another satirical romp in South Florida. Most of the actions centers about the Winter White House in Palm Beach, Casa Bellicosa where the portly president resides (Secret Service code name "Mastadon", First Lady's is "Mockingbird".) The book is a great send-up of charitable event staging, political fundraising and various shenanigans. The primary entertainment for the prez is provided by his "nutritionist" but t ...more
Sid Nuncius
Aug 23, 2020 rated it it was amazing
I thought Squeeze Me was great fun.

Set in Florida, the plot involves the lives of the very rich and of the President being disrupted by the appearance of some huge Burmese pythons, a species which has established itself in Florida largely through abandoned pets as they became to big to handle. Angie Armstrong is a wildlife removal specialist who becomes involved and then enraged by the cover-up and attempt to frame an innocent man for political gain. A convoluted, amusing and rather gripping st
Laura A Lang
Aug 30, 2020 rated it did not like it
Narrow focused hatchet job on President and First Lady is a slut. Hiaasen’s humor has saved me during stressful times. Not this time. Disappointed
Aug 30, 2020 rated it did not like it
Wow, Carl calm down!
Your distaste of Trump, I understand, but making that a main theme in the story was STUPID.
I was reading to escape the reality of Trump and your book did not help.
Anna Avian
Jan 07, 2021 rated it it was ok
The story started off well but by the halfway point it stalled and everything became a little too ridiculous and boring. The jokes about Mastodon stopped being funny at some point and just became tiresome and repetitive. It was disappointing that none of the characters had any redeeming value.
Jun 02, 2020 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
On a very black night here in NYC, I laughed. Thank you Carl Hiassen for giving me a reason to smile. Writing a satire is difficult, but Hiassen totally nails it with this satire of Palm Beach and the high society, vacuous denizens.

Amazing, it is a snake that causes chaos, much the same as a snake has caused chaos in our nation. It amazed me that this book was so up to date with referrals to Covid 19. The main character is Angie, an animal wrangler with her own backstory.

Spoiler alert: if you
Aug 30, 2020 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Where's that sixth star when you need it? This book (which I listened to, rather than reading in physical book format) was masterfully read by Scott Brick and it washed over me like cool water on a burning hot day. To put it mildly, I needed Hiaasan's signature comedic genius to lighten my days, and he delivers with Squeeze Me. Angie Armstrong is a lovably imperfect wildlife wrangler and disgraced former veterinarian who, in a moment of highly forgivable weakness, fed a wildlife poacher's hand t ...more
Dec 14, 2020 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I confess to being a bit of a literary snob who tends to read (mostly contemporary) "literature" that has no genre. I almost never read mysteries or detective stories, and while I do love psychological thrillers when they are done well, I find very few that are. Every now and then we all need a good laugh and a break and escape from the intensity of our current world. This book was that for me.

Carl Hiaasen is in a category all his own, and is (almost) always good for seriously hilarious, laugh-o
Craig Pittman
Sep 29, 2020 rated it it was amazing
By my count, I have read 20 of Carl Hiaasen's novels -- the 14 wacky crime novels he's written for adults, starting with "Tourist Season"; five of his books for kids, starting with "Hoot"; and one absolutely scathing non-fiction book he wrote about Disney World called "Team Rodent." I still regard "Hoot" as his best book but I have to say that his new one, "Squeeze Me," is in the top three (along with "Native Tongue").

Part of it is his choice of protagonist -- Angie Armstrong, a one-time officer
kartik narayanan
Sep 02, 2020 rated it really liked it
A vintage Carl Hiassen.

Even though it is formulaic, the humour is still there as is the poignancy. This book is also more scathing about the Trump Presidency than any of the tell-all books out there. Skink is there but his presence is more of a guest appearance, which is fine, given that the character has been with us for a long time.

Don't miss this.
Hiassen satire at its best! Presidential references are hysterical and incredibly authentic.

Loved Scott Brick's narrating and listening to anything he does is always a joy!

Hiaasen is magical and especially appreciated during these unpredictable times.🗳
Aug 29, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: adult-fiction
I love Carl Hiaasen. This book is so timely. Wish he wrote faster.
Lee A Brown
Aug 30, 2020 rated it did not like it
Carl's drinking the Kool Aid

I used to love this author, his quirky characters , and the witty repartee. His love for Florida, pre- overwhelming development, is still admirable. However, his barely disguised attack of a sitting President and family is beyond the pale, and I will no longer be a follower.
Another decent Carl Hiaasen, "Florida Man" headline type of humor, but this time taking gratuitous, grotesque, hyperbolic caricature shots of the Trump-like President...Not only taking shots at Trump, but the 63 million Americans who DON'T want professional politicians running our lives and have respect for America as founded...Why do pop culture literati feel its necessary to take such shots at people who don't want "business-as-usual" at the national level so that the "Deep State" can play the ...more
Mike Harris
Aug 29, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Book No. 91 of the year and easily the best so far. Carl Hiaasen is so damn good
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Play Book Tag: Squeeze Me - 5 stars 1 17 Dec 02, 2020 09:47AM  

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Carl Hiaasen was born and raised in Florida. After graduating from the University of Florida, he joined the Miami Herald as a general assignment reporter and went on to work for the newspaper’s weekly magazine and prize-winning investigations team. As a journalist and author, Carl has spent most of his life advocating for the protection of the Florida Everglades. He and his family live in southern ...more

Other books in the series

Skink (8 books)
  • Double Whammy (Skink #1)
  • Native Tongue (Skink #2)
  • Stormy Weather (Skink, #3)
  • Sick Puppy (Skink, #4)
  • Skinny Dip (Skink, #5; Mick Stranahan #2)
  • Star Island (Skink, #6)
  • Skink--No Surrender (Skink #7)

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“His core furnishings were an XBox console, a 60-inch plasma,” 3 likes
“Angie had been summoned to Casa Bellicosa to unfasten a screech owl from the presidential pompadour, which the low-swooping raptor had mistaken for a road-kill fox. When Angie arrived, the commander-in-chief was lurching madly around the helipad, bellowing and clawing at the Velcro skull patch into which the confused bird had embedded its talons.” 2 likes
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