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458 pages, Paperback
First published June 23, 2020
1. The Nocturne Academy map: I don't get it, it's not necessary, also why is it only an external view of the school and when did I become a person who has an unhinged cartographical opinion on every map she sees? I don't know, but these are just some questions that plague me at night.
2. Swearing: your girl is a potty mouth but is not impressed by the lack of diverse profanity in this novel. Where is the creative vulgarity? Why is bitch the only word utilized as an insult? I understand this is a YA series but there is a world of teenage appropriate slander that is aching to be used (see: douche-canoe, shit-stain, floppy asparagus, etc.)
3. The Hallowed Glade: I didn't think I was this person but WHY IS THIS NOT ON THE MAP? What is the purpose of having a map with an external viewpoint and then not having any external locations be labelled let alone visible? My gears have been ground (grinded?) and I am not OK about it.
4. The Guardian: Apparently I am going OFF with this map nonsense because the Guardian is supposed to be this great physical being that is not stationary in any way and thus cannot be used as a geographically consistent marker so WHY IN THE SEVEN CIRCLES OF HELL IS IT LABELLED ON THE MAP? I feel like the map was a cool creative idea that was pitched but was just thrown in at the very end and was not fleshed out properly at all and it irritates my soul in every fashion. For a five-star literary map, please see The Hobbit or The Lord of the Rings, Winnie-the-Pooh, The Princess Bride, Narnia - evidently I could go on about maps for entirely too long so maybe I should stop while I'm ahead.
"Clearly there was no love lost between Nancy and her mom and for a moment I felt sorry for them. My mom and I had butted heads on occasion but my mother had never slapped me or called me stupid and I had known that she loved me unconditionally, right up until the end.
Then I remembered how nasty Nancy and her mom both had been to me and my pity faded. They deserved their toxic relationship and really it wasn’t surprising they were so nasty to each other when they were clearly just as terrible to everyone else around them.
“Some people just have bad blood,” my mother used to say and I had to think she would have said the same about Winifred and Nancy Rattcliff right at that moment.


