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Addicted to Unhappiness: How Hidden Motives for Unhappiness Keep You from Creating the Life You Truly Want, And What You Can Do
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Addicted to Unhappiness: How Hidden Motives for Unhappiness Keep You from Creating the Life You Truly Want, And What You Can Do

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3.65  ·  Rating details ·  105 ratings  ·  12 reviews
Paperback, Second, 197 pages
Published October 1st 2019 by Smart Love Press, LLC
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Average rating 3.65  · 
Rating details
 ·  105 ratings  ·  12 reviews


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Jonathan Karmel
Someone recommended this book to me, so I was a little surprised that I got so little out of it. Perhaps I didn't find much value in it because I am not "addicted to unhappiness," so I could not relate to what the author was talking about.

This book seems to say that people whose life circumstances are good are only unhappy because they have some unconscious desire to make themselves unhappy. This unconscious desire is something that comes from a confusion between happiness and unhapp
...more
adllto
Nov 16, 2010 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: ologies
The authors are claiming that we can be addicted to unhappiness in the sense that we need it in our lives. The idea is really not that crazy because in built into us is the pursuit of happiness. As a child unfortunately through inappropriate discipline for appropriately aged behaviour and values we associate our feelings of unhappiness with what makes our parents and authority figures happy. Children being mirrors or imitators simply take it in. Thus our happiness can be not only linked to appro ...more
Dan Walker
I very much appreciated what I learned from this book, and that I need to examine my life for areas where I am satisfied with being unhappy. I've come to live with things that are very wrong but I don't do anything to address them because I accept them as "normal."

Unfortunately, the solutions to solving these issues always involve intentional, focused hard work. There are no shortcuts. But realizing there is a problem is the first step, and always leads to some improvement. So that's
...more
Magali Pool
Jan 07, 2014 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Al principio un poco amargo (como me gustan), me hizo reflexionar sobre mi conducta y la de los demás; es un gran apoyo para mi profesión
Rebecca
Oct 16, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I had never thought of any of this before. I do not believe this is completely true for all people. But, I do think it has relevance in most people's lives. If nothing else, it is very informative on what others think. I voluntarily read and reviewed this book in exchange for a free copy.
Rachel
I'm not sure I unreservedly buy into the central thesis, which is that when children aren't treated optimally they mistake the resulting negative feelings for happiness (because, to their minds, it's what their perfect parents intend for them to feel and must thus be an ideal state). According to this theory, adults then end up "addicted" to the unhappiness they felt as children and consistently act in ways that sabotage their true happiness to bring themselves back to a state of unhappiness (wh ...more
Blanche_in_Lakeview
Fascinating book so far. Has some really good advice not only for raising children, but also pertains to problems that adults have that may have manifested as a result of things that happened in their childhood. We all know parents are not perfect, but it is important to analyze our behaviors, examining the past closely so that we can better understand ourselves and our loved ones around us. With a better understanding of the role that discipline, love and parenting that our parents gave us, we ...more
Jane  Lew
Builds on attachment theory. The harder work on figuring out your emotional makeup is better done wrangling other, more intense books (for me, Anthony Storr's Solitude and Jonathan Heidt's Happiness Hypothesis) to reach the kind of objectivity needed to do what this book suggests. Still, several sensible insights. It works after you don't need it so badly.
Jessica
May 07, 2013 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Although I agree that people can make a habit out of being unhappy and thinking negative thoughts, I am not sure I buy into the fact that the unhappiness we experience now is because of childhood experiences and the past relationships with our parents. Or at least not to the extent the author believes.
Peetieeeee
Reading this was alright but I don’t think i will read this book more than once 🤷🏻♀i just don’t agree with the whole book...there were parts I liked and excerpts i enjoyed and that I will put in my journal but that’s about it. The premise was not anywhere close to what I was thinking this book was headed towards. It just didn’t float my boat. 🚤 ...more
Hernán López
Aug 16, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Bastante interesante análisis y propuestas acerca del comportamiento humano. Una de tantas expliciaciones, uno de tantos porqués. Guía práctica que se puede llevar a la práctica en cualquier etapa de la vida.
Becca P
May 31, 2009 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Crybabies like myself
Blames my habitual problems on my childhood experiences. I like not accepting the blame.
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Smart Love Press has just published the second edition of Addicted to Unhappiness: How Hidden Motives for Unhappiness Keep You from Creating the Life You Truly Want, And What You Can Do. Carol Gilligan said, "To me, the thesis was riveting and instantly applicable. I see it all around me."
Smart Love Press published my second children's book, Jilly"s Terrible Temper Tantrums: And How She Outg
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