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The Wizard, the Witch, and Two Girls from Jersey

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3.62  ·  Rating details ·  905 ratings  ·  88 reviews
When mortal enemies Veronica and Heather get hit by a bar code scanner while fighting over the last copy of a hot fantasy novel, they are transported into the novel. Having accidentally killed the book's heroine, Vero and Heather have no choice but to try to save the land of Galma from the Twilight Queen.
Paperback, 288 pages
Published May 18th 2006 by Razorbill
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Average rating 3.62  · 
Rating details
 ·  905 ratings  ·  88 reviews


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Whatchyareading
If you take fantasy books as serious business (for example, if you’ve ever yelled this at someone: ” How dare you say Hobbits aren’t real?!”), then this book is not for you. But if you can find humor in things you enjoy, then I have a feeling you’ll like this book. I did.

Now, the characters. At first, I thought this book would be more about Veronica since she’s the one who actually reads fantasy books and knows the layout of the world her and Heather are zapped into. (Don’t try to figure out the
...more
Dani
Nov 08, 2008 rated it did not like it
Shelves: ya
I checked this out of the library for myself, but my 12-year-old daughter got to it first. She devoured it in two days and proclaimed that I had to read it. Her enthusiasm was the only thing that got me through this predictable book.

To be fair, the one-dimensional characters probably wouldn't be so predictable to a middle schooler who hasn't been exposed to as much television and film as I have. You have the nerdy girl and the rich airhead, the less handsome guy who turns out to be a better
...more
Arminzerella
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Brooke
Feb 23, 2010 rated it liked it
Fun, clean fantasy (some language) about two girls who, when fighting over the same book they both need for a school paper, are zapped into the story itself. Unwittingly one of them kills the heroine of the story and so assumes her place. Slowly they make their way through the kingdom and the plot trying to bring sunlight back into the kingdom of Galma with the help of a Kebler Elf (who makes delicious cookies) and a wizard. References to Keebler Elves, Lord of the Rings, The Lion, the Witch and ...more
Christine
Mar 23, 2011 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: ya
If you take fantasy books as serious business (for example, if you’ve ever yelled this at someone: ” How dare you say Hobbits aren’t real?!”), then this book is not for you. But if you can find humor in things you enjoy, then I have a feeling you’ll like this book. I did.

Now, the characters. At first, I thought this book would be more about Veronica since she’s the one who actually reads fantasy books and knows the layout of the world her and Heather are zapped into. (Don’t try to figure out the
...more
Kate  Maxwell
May 29, 2011 rated it it was ok
Recommends it for: young young adults
Shelves: ya
This was a cute YA book that could have carried a better message and had a better ending. Our girls had read this some years ago. I was cleaning the bookcase and came across this one, remembering that they all had enjoyed it, so I read it to determine whether or not I should keep it.

This story is about two girls who are opposites but get sucked into a fantasy novel as they are fighting over the last copy in the book store the night before the book report is due. Once they enter the story, the
...more
Caitlin
Apr 19, 2008 rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: My family and Friends
Recommended to Caitlin by: My mother
Summary : It is about Veronica and Heather two girls that get send into Chapter Two of the classic fantasy novel, The Queen of Twilight. The Queen of Twilight is a book with something for all fantasy fans to love—including a magical land that has been shrouded in darkness for years by an evil queen.

Heather and Veronica accidentally kill the book’s heroine, and from then on, they have to work together to find their way back to the real world. With only an elf-bakery reject, a talking squirrel,
...more
Alice Li
I wanna say, I'm not the average 12 year old who like rainbows and glitters (well I do but still). The main characters were both very annoying and petty. This was so stereotypical and utterly annoying. It was legit what you would see in some stupid TV show.
The first character was the "popular" girl. She was the one who makes the dumb decisions without caring about other's well being. She doesn't care if it could killed the entire group or if they might be lead off a cliff because she is being
...more
Kayla
May 28, 2017 rated it liked it
Shelves: on-the-shelf
I found the book to be entertaining and a great break way for anyone who is thinking about starting in fantasy because it carries many similar themes and characters from more traditional stories. The only thing I would say is there is definitely a demographic for this book. It took me a lot longer to finish the book this time because it is quite clear that it is more relatable to a teen reader. I thought some parts were a little over the top, but I understand the intent of describing characters ...more
Marsha
When a fantasy book has a title like this, you pay attention. Featuring a mildly incompetent wizard, a very cute (but deadly) dragon, a malodorous Moat Beast, an elf with a fondness for baking cookies and a tower that looks suspiciously like a certain famous New York tourist site, et al., the reader quickly comes to realize that this book is special. It’s funny, scary, quirky and has more references to other fantasy novels than you can shake a wand at. Best of all, the story revolves around the ...more
Janet Hamm
Feb 12, 2017 rated it did not like it
1 1/2 stars for a great plot idea and for the very entertaining copy on the inside flaps and back cover of the book. As a spoof of fantasy novels, it was not very well done. The narrator often showed its presence with some "I" statement which was meant to be humorous, but never actually made an appearance in the book; this was needlessly confusing, and pulled me out of the story. The characters were not very interesting, especially Veronica, with whom we begin and end the book, (which led me to ...more
Kit
Apr 27, 2008 rated it it was amazing
You know when you realize that the premise of a new book could either be done really well or be a flaming ball of suckitude? That was how I felt when I started this book, in which Heather and Veronica, the prom queen and the bookworm from Jersey, get zapped into a sword-and-sorcery novel. It could have been awful, but instead it was really, really well done. The sendups of fantasy conventions were actually thoughtful rather than just dumb jokes about guys in tights. Veronica is a great ...more
Marsha
Sep 22, 2008 rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: everyone
Shelves: fantasy-fiction
I enjoyed this book more than any book I can recall reading recently. It was funny, suspenseful, clever, and I genuinely cared about the characters. Usually, I am not a fantasy fiction reader, but the title, a play on the title "The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe" caught my eye, and I realized that the book is a parody of all the fantasy books one has read from "Lord of the Rings" to "The Golden Compass." When two girls get in a fight in a bookstore over the last remaining copy of a fantasy ...more
Liana
Chick-lit meets epic fantasy! (YES, YOU HEARD ME.) Oh my gosh, this book is so SILLY. ...AND CRAZY! The description alone should give you a general idea on how blissfully wacky it is, (two girls get hit by a bar code scanner and get transported into a fantasy book?! WUUUHHHHH?) If that isn't weird enough for you, wait until you see what's inside the pages! Seriously, I found myself laughing like an idiot in every chapter. Mostly at the characters - they're all pretty extreme. ESPECIALLY HEATHER! ...more
Sarah
Sep 30, 2009 rated it liked it
I thought this satirical fantasy was cute and fluffy, just what it was probably intended to be. The author also helped write M or F? which I liked. My book club students selected this one to read simply because of the title and front cover. The two main characters, Heather and Veronica, are thrown together into the fantasy world of a novel they are writing a paper on for class. Heather is assumed to be the princess and the two girls play along because they want the wizard to help them get back ...more
Louie
Sep 20, 2017 rated it really liked it
Recommends it for: Everyone 12 and up
The Wizard, The Witch, and Two girls from Jersey was funny, lighthearted, and a little unexpected. I liked this book very much, but I still felt that this story was slower than it should have been,since it took almost a week to finish it. I liked Veronica and Heather's characters a lot though , Veronica with her love of fantasy novels, and Heather's love of fashion. The jokes were funny, especially the ones from Heather, I liked how the author Lisa Papademetriou, not Fabiella Banks, referenced ...more
Heather Nguyen
Dec 25, 2016 rated it it was amazing
i ate this right up when i was 12 AND i share a name with one of the protagonists AND i applied to the college i currently attend solely because it was mentioned in this book!!!!! so i feel like it's impossible for me to associate the wizard, the witch, and the two girls from jersey with anything bad. (even though i know it's vapid and rather shallow, it's perfect for when ur in the mood for light fluffy reading..,,. which for me is basically always.) :~)
Amanda Strittmatter
Jun 06, 2016 rated it really liked it
For anyone who's read the entire classic fantasy library, this is the book for all of the those things you always wondered about. What happens in between the scenes when characters are "traveling"? Are there descriptions that don't make it into the book? What about the locations on the map the characters don't go to?
It's light and silly and a lot of fun.
Dominique Yu
Dec 09, 2014 rated it it was amazing
I find this book really really funny! :D i find the whole thing amusing. granted there were some serious stuff but the journey is really funny.
Taryn
Jun 25, 2018 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I read this book 12 years ago when it first came out and as I was rereading it, I was really enjoying the first half, but the second half became a chore to finish. I finished it only because I couldn't remember exactly what happened, but I don't know, I enjoyed 12 years ago, so that's saying something I guess.
Danielle Riggs
Oct 14, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: ya-lit
This was one of my favorite books when I was young.
Kathy
Sep 06, 2011 rated it did not like it
Every now and then I pick up a Lone Star title in the YA section of my library for a light read. I did finish this one, but it was lacking in plot and character development. It also had a few objectionable words, that I thought were rather unnecessary. It did make me smile a few times... Kiblar elves that make cookies (groan) and the Countess of Uncomfortable Humidity or "Drizzly Witch" (clever). I didn't fall in love with any of the characters here, and I can't think of anyone in my life I ...more
Mike
Jan 18, 2009 rated it liked it
This is a book to not judge by its cover, which screams "rather young, very female audience". It is, in fact, about (and probably aimed at) teenage girls, but I'm more than 20 years and a Y chromosome away from being a teenage girl and I liked it.

It plays with and subverts fantasy tropes in a way that's always affectionate, and has a good story with some fun characters. One of the main characters, Heather, also goes through a lot of positive change in the course of the relatively short book.
Heather
Mar 31, 2009 rated it it was amazing
Probably the best book I've read all year, this book is tailored for people who know something about fantasy novels as it focuses on two girls, one a fantasy fan and one a spoiled ditz, who get sucked into a popular fantasy book and accidentally screw everything up. I haven't read a book that made me laugh out loud like this one did in a long time. Between the Duchess of Uncomfortable Humidity (also known as the Dizzly Witch), the world's cutest dragon, and Kiblar elves that are known for their ...more
Harley Bennett
Feb 04, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: favorites
Two girls, Veronica and Heather, get into a fight over the last copy of Queen of Twilight. When they accidentally get zapped by the store clerk with his broken scanner, they end up in the book where Heather is mistaken for Princess Arabelle. Veronica expects things to play out exactly like they did in the book, but the real life Galma is a lot different from the one in the story. Things are much worse and Veronica, Heather, and their companions are constantly in danger.
Great story. I love this
...more
Echo
Jul 14, 2009 rated it liked it
I was torn between giving this book 3 or 4 stars. The concept really grabbed me when I saw it in the bookstore. When I started reading it, there were a few times I thought, "Okay, that sounds like something I would have thought up in the stories I wrote when I was 12." Then again, this is written for a younger crowd, so maybe those are ideas the target audience would love. Also, I think she executed them well, even if they were very simple ideas.
Overall, I really liked this one by the end. It
...more
Karolinde (Kari)
This book is a spoof of and a tribute to the fantasy genre. Two girls find themselves zapped into a story where they accidently kill the heroine and change the story. There are direct mentions of some of the truly great fantasy novels along with characters and devices that are obviously "inspired" from others. (There's a sword wielding squirrel who is a bit of a coward and a wicked witch with a long green nose.)

The funny part of the book is that at the end, you're not sure who is scamming who,
...more
Risa
Dec 12, 2013 rated it liked it
This book i did like it and it really caught my attention from the very start , never did it really seem boring at any point. So this book is about two very different girls, one named Veronica Lopez and the other Heather Simms the both meet each other when fighting over a book and suddenly the get warped into the book , the only way to get putts to help each other out and save The Land Galma. This book i could never put down it really amazed me !
Gail Harcourt-Brown
Aug 12, 2008 rated it it was ok
This book got a lot of attention for having a funny title and a new twist on the ever-popular "A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court" story. I admit I was suckered in by the title and a handful of reviewers who thought it was uproariously funny. Unfortunately, the book is only mildly funny. The author went for the obvious laughs, and the prose is so clumsy in places, it makes you wonder if anyone at Razorbill actually read the manuscript before sending it to the printers.
Rachel
Aug 13, 2014 rated it liked it
Shelves: fantasy
A cute, imaginative tale about two girls who get zapped into a fantasy storybook. They appear at the end of chapter two, accidentally kill the heroine, and promptly change the story completely--in an extremely entertaining fashion.

Recommended for middle school girls, as that was the age that I most enjoyed it.
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Bestselling author Lisa Papademetriou is the author of the 'Confectionately Yours' series, 'Middle School: Big, Fat Liar' and 'Homeroom Diaries' (both with James Patterson), and many other novels for middle grade and young adult readers. Her books have appeared on the Bank Street Best Books of the Year list, the NYPL Books for the Teen Age, and the Texas Lone Star Reading List, among others. A ...more