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The Hitman's Guide to Making Friends and Finding Love (The Hitman's Guide, #1)
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The Hitman's Guide to Making Friends and Finding Love

(The Hitman's Guide #1)

4.32  ·  Rating details ·  1,230 ratings  ·  281 reviews
What happens when a snarky hitman and a by-the-book PI cross paths?

Being a hitman has its perks, but I never thought getting an accidental mooning by an attractive PI while he’s caught on a fence would be one of them. While it’s not exactly love at first sight, he’s captured my interest and won’t let go.

Suddenly, I find myself caught in a game of cat and
Kindle Edition, 375 pages
Published July 30th 2019
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 ·  1,230 ratings  ·  281 reviews

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☆ Todd

OMG, this story had freaking EPIC, non-stop snark and banter!!!

I'd initially feared that in order to keep up the high levels of comedy, the author might need to resort to lowering the quality of the jokes, getting corny, and trying too hard, but that amazingly never happened. At least not for me.
“I haven’t called [the police] yet. I’m giving you one last day of freedom to do anything you want.”

“Ah, makes sense. Anything?”


“Can I touch your willy?”

“Besides that.”

“Can I look at your
DNF 8%

It's me, not the book. I like humor but not this kind of humor. It's just too OTT and silly.
Lorraine Lesar
Oct 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Insanity at it’s finest.

What you need to know....
Leland is a Hitman. A Hitman like no other. He is known in the business as The Sandman.
Jackson is a P.I. He’s known to The Sandman as Assman.
Both are trying to bring a head of a crime syndicate to justice - both having their own interruption on the definition of justice.

What you don’t need to know (but I’m going to tell you anyway)....
This was totally insane!
It’s the Marmite Book of all Marmite Books - you are going to either totally love it....or
This book is similar in style and tone to the In Darkness books. While I adored the In Darkness series and found them to have characters with great chemistry and banter and a good balance between the funny and the action/mystery story, The Hitman's Guide didn't work quite as well for me in those aspects.

The story started off well, but started to drag towards the middle (and it's a pretty long book). While it was often funny, Leland's snark and commentary was pretty unrelenting and became

My gawd... I can't believe I've read all these 343 pages of.. Utterly nonsense, OTT behavior. Why, Why did I do that?


I thought this was supposed te be funny? Clearly I have a different kind of humor..

“What is wrong with you? And why the fuck can’t I get you off me? I can’t even move!”

He flails around some, which I think is really cute. Instead of giving in, I grab onto his earlobe with my lips and pull on it.

“I’ll suck your jackhammer.”

“No! Stop tempting me!”

Now he’s trying to crawl out from
I have all of the love in the world for the buddy who rec'd this (not to me specifically but who enjoyed and did express warnings it was OTT and ridiculous) but this book was.. well..

I'll admit the beginning was kind of entertaining. Yes, OTT, and yes, ridiculous, but there were brief moments in the beginning where I amused -- in a 'so dumb I lol' way. But then there was the repetition, then the silly turned into what-the-fuckery, and just overall nothing was realistic or even fun anymore.

Oct 27, 2019 rated it liked it
I think whether you enjoy this book or not depends a lot on whether you can cope with Leland.

I found his sexual banter funny to start with, but it became ‘too much of the same’ pretty quickly. And then irritation set in. Never have I met a character as overbearing and annoying as him. Yes, he does have two or three more serious moments, but unfortunately, they remain underdeveloped. Shame because that’s exactly what I wanted to see!

What’s left is a supposedly cute guy who behaves inappropriately
Oct 23, 2019 rated it really liked it
This is a perfect example of a love it or hate it kinda book. This most likely depends on how you view Leland.

I adored him. I thought he was hilarious (but exhausting).

It wasn’t love at first sight for me. I’ll be honest for the first couple of chapters I felt it could have gone either way. But once these two started interacting they had me.

Leland is the notorious Sandman. He’s never had anything like a normal life. And I so wanted him to find that with Jackson.

I laughed, chuckled and smiled my
/5 Overall Stars
/5 on the laugh level.
/5 Heat Index

I’m still on a review hiatus. Not an official thing. Just can’t be bothered. But I will make an exception and write a longer one for this one sometime in the next few days. Because this book deserves a review with all the bells and whistles and quotes and gifs. And since I highlighted half of the darn book while reading it, I have plenty to use.

Put simply for now. This is my favorite book of the summer. I mean, Summer isn’t over. But I’d be
Aug 01, 2019 rated it it was amazing

OMG I enjoyed this book too much! Especially every time Leland opened his mouth and talk! LOL.
And Jackson was definitely enjoying harassment after harassment from Leland.

Full review soon :)
Samantha Tucker
Aug 04, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Best comedic book this year

I almost died reading this book. I laughed so hard that I cried and then I laughed some more until I started coughing. I love books that make me laugh. This book over delivered. There was a great mix of action and angst that was offset perfectly by the hilarity. I texted my friend at least 4 times to tell her about the humor in this book. I'm usually not really into detective type books but the slow romantic buildup as well as the nonsensical jokes really made me love
Aug 25, 2019 rated it really liked it
Don't judge me. I laughed - more than once. This is American slapstick humor which often crosses the line into ridiculousness. What was it about this story that kept me so engaged?

I somehow formed an emotional connection to both characters. PI Jackson is an ex military 39 year old gay man. He didn't come out to his parents until his thirties. His mother is a horrible homophobic witch and I hated that he was so forgiving of her hatefulness. <--- see? Emotionally connected.

The Sandman (he signs
4.25 stars.

I could never lose this man. I could never lose any of this. Without a doubt, I would give up everything for him.

I'm reading the second book in this series as I write this review and I can say hands down, that both these books have to be the funniest books I've read. I don't know how Alice did it. But she did, and I'm a fan.

Love the characters, the plot, the non stop banter. Especially the banter. This book had people look at me funny on my way to work and back home because I
I absolutely loved every single second of this! Highly recommend. SO funny. Leland is AMAZING! New to me author and it's a winner!

Ok, ROFL, Leland(27) was crazy and had so many absurd ideas, that made me laugh most of the time. Poor Jackson(39) had his hands full with this kinky and pushy bottom, but he wouldn't wish otherwise. There were many absurd scenes, things that in real life would never go that way, but the book was interesting, the chars charming and they gave me some good hours of relax.
Ridiculously Funny

This book was such a treat! It was extremely hilarious, dark, sexy, sweet and totally adorable. I didn’t try to see it in a realistic way, simply comedy and fun, and it delivered tenfold. Can’t wait to see what Leland and Jackson get up to in HG2!
Y’all. What the actual fuck

I couldn’t get beyond page one where there are derogatory dick and tits looking at all these reviews, it’s transphobia FTW I guess

Who was the sensitivity reader for this
Sep 24, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Good lord I loved this book... hilarious banter, lots of vulnerability and love and just pure joy. While it has zero realism, it has 100% fun & fiction. Leland made me smile ...more
2 Stars

I thought this was going to be a new favorite. I really did. It started off perfectly with fantastic banter and a unique, quirky character. How could that have possibly gone wrong?


I realize I am in the minority here but I thought the non-stop banter and snark was too much and OTT. There was absolutely nothing realistic about this plot and every "serious" moment was unfailingly interrupted by pointless, weird banter and ramblings from Leland. I realize that he is most likely on the
Joyfully Jay
Jul 30, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: jay
A Joyfully Jay review.

4.5 stars

Alice Winters has a style that I just love and her stories mix humor, sweetness, and excitement in such nice balance. The Hitman’s Guide is another great example of this and I really just loved the way the humor and the heart combine here.

The story starts out delightful as Jackson and Leland are hunting the same man and Jackson accidentally finds himself mooning Leland (and no, Leland will never let him live that down). I think the pacing here is really well done
Aug 08, 2019 rated it really liked it
Hard to rate. On the one hand it's the book that got me out of my current reading slump and therefore it has to be good and no doubt it is fun to read. At the beginning I couldn't get enough of Leland's juvenile comments and actions. Socially inept and a nut-job (in a good way) he's to most unusual hitman I ever read about and in Jackson with his dry sarcasm he has the right sparring partner most of the time. Just as it got nearly to much and bordered into exhausting the author showed that
Aug 13, 2019 rated it liked it
Tbh I feel like this book would’ve been soooo much better if it were shorter. The first like 30% of the book was absolutely great and I couldn’t stop laughing HOWEVER COMMA there’s too much comedic meandering in the plot line and it was honestly exhausting. The characters will start out talking about something serious, like a kidnapping, but then will spend the next like 10 pages talking about sex dolls or sex dungeons over and over and over and over and over again. If you’ve read this author’s ...more
LOL funny stuff.

What kept it from 5 stars is that these MCs acted 10 years younger than their chronological ages. It was an odd disconnect that had they been late 20s and late teens (rather than late 30s and 20s as the book says they are) would have felt more appropriate. Of course, all the things that occurred in their past would have been harder to cram in to people so young...but still. It was weird...I kept having to remember that they weren't as young as they sounded/acted. Maybe more
Aug 06, 2019 rated it liked it
This book was quirky in the way AW writes quirky characters. I liked that the PI actually was a rule follower (but Jackson was boring) and encouraged Leland to do so as well. I liked that Leland just went with how he felt and Jackson loved and accepted him the weird way he was, I even liked that the Chief wasn't a tool.

What didn't happen here was very much chemistry. Or any chemistry at all. All of their intimate moments, although some were very funny, lacked heat and magnetism. I didn't really
Aug 01, 2019 rated it it was ok
Given the sheer entertainment values showcased by the outrageous adventures of sassy killer-for-hire-cum-closeted vigilante Sandman and his growly PI mate, this would have been a three-star book had Mrs Winters attempted to raise the level of her writing a few notches over subliterary (for her style is so lax and colloquial, if not conversational - and peppered with enough blemishes and typos to draw the ire of even a non-native speaker of English, let alone grammar Nazis - that it proved ...more
Aug 03, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Wildly Entertaining!

As is the case with Alice Winters’ books the characters here are entertaining, the dialog amusing and the action sequences exciting. Lots of people have mentioned how funny the book is. But let me tell you it’s not the only emotion. I was in tears more than once and anger was high as I wanted to throat punch Jackson’s mother.

Leland and Jackson are fun characters. The dynamic is very reminiscent of Felix and Lane from the In Darkness series. In fact Felix and Leland in the
Started off strong with good laughs but then I got a bit too much Leland and now I don’t think I can read more of him .

Good book though. 3 stars.
Even a hitman deserves love

3.5 stars

Leland isn't your typical hitman. Sure he is good at his job but when he doesn't have a gun in his hand, he is nothing but continuous sex jokes. I did love it at first but after awhile it got a bit old. However, he was still a lovable character who needed someone to show him the right path. That's where Jackson comes in. Jackson is an army vet who runs a P.I. agency. One night on a job he runs into Leland, or really is spotted by him, and his life was never
Aug 12, 2019 rated it really liked it
Ok I loved this book. Mostly because I loved Leland. He is so funny and ridiculous and yet sweet and made me snort my tea out my nose. Very ladylike I know.
I will definitely check out more by this author. I’ve been in a not-too-much-angst kick and this one fits that bill perfectly.
Aug 12, 2019 rated it really liked it
Lots of fun, loved the banter and Leland is something special. It felt like the writing lost a bit of steam/energy in the second half but I still loved it and will happily read more.
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“I’ve seen your butthole and that pretty much makes us BFFs.” 1 likes
“Tell me you like my nipples and everything will go back to normal.” 0 likes
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