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Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come: One Introvert's Year of Saying Yes

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4.01  ·  Rating details ·  3,599 ratings  ·  601 reviews
What would happen if a shy introvert lived like a gregarious extrovert for one year? If she knowingly and willingly put herself in perilous social situations that she’d normally avoid at all costs? Writer Jessica Pan intends to find out. With the help of various extrovert mentors, Jessica sets up a series of personal challenges (talk to strangers, perform stand-up comedy, ...more
Audiobook, 9 pages
Published May 28th 2019 by Andrews McMeel Publishing
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Toni
May 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I'm not a shintrovert (shy introvert - a term I was not familiar with before reading this book). I enjoy working with people and speaking to them. Yet, I do need my private time and space and reading to recharge my batteries. I have always been happy with this and a company of my fantastic friends who do not see being an introvert or extrovert as better or worse than the other. Reading 'Sorry, I'm late ' was like talking to a friend, a witty, ironic, courageous, sometimes self-absorbed, but ...more
carol.
Apr 18, 2019 marked it as don-t-count  ·  review of another edition
This sounds ghastly.
MissBecka
A lot of the stuff she forced herself to try was waaaaaay out of my comfort zone.
Mad props to her for giving it a go and I was happy to live vicariously through her.
The author is funny and has a way of making you feel a part of the story.
I'm not sure if that's because I related so much to her story or if she is just that awesome.
One will never know.
Thanks to NetGalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for my DRC.
Katherine Elizabeth
My first read of 2020, and it was rather average. I enjoyed how personal Jessica Pan got during her year of "extraverted-ness," but there was something missing for me in terms of execution and enjoyment while reading. I'm going to chalk it up to an "it's me, not you" situation!
Jenny (Reading Envy)
I don't know if I'm an introvert. I know I'm perceived as an extrovert, so much so that when I moved into my current job, one of the librarians who would have to report to me sent me an article about how to care for introverts (ha!) But I have my own hill to climb to actually go out or show up. And I usually enjoy myself if I can hole up with a small group or one person (Gallup calls this the relator strength and doesn't bother with the E/I dichotomy.)

I enjoyed this book where Jessica Pan spent
...more
Rebecca
Like Jessica Pan, I’m a shy introvert (a “shintrovert”) as well as an American in the UK, so I was intrigued to see the strategies she employed and the experiences she sought out during a year of behaving like an extrovert. She forced herself to talk to strangers on the tube, gave a talk at London’s Union Chapel as part of the Moth, used friendship apps to make new girlfriends, did stand-up comedy and improv, attended networking events, went on holiday to an unknown destination, took magic ...more
Sara Tucker
May 08, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
As an introvert with occasionally crippling social anxiety, I regarded Jess Pan's book warily. I saw the cover online, laughed at the icing-on-the-cake image, and then gave the subtitle a little side-eye. An introvert… saying yes… for a whole year? Say it ain't so.

Alas, Pan pulled me in with enticing hopes of being more extroverted without it costing me my sanity, and I'm very happy I gave this one a chance.

I'll start off by saying that motivational, inspirational books like You Are a Badass:
...more
Mehrsa
Oct 19, 2019 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Too shallow to be worthwhile. It's all about a shy introvert pushing herself to do extroverted things like speaking in front of people or talking to people randomly and sharing her goofy adventures along the way. I don't love the obsession people seem to have with labels like introvert and extrovert, but I also find it odd that there are no books written by extroverts about how they decided not to always be out or talking to strangers or maybe they decided to stay home and read and how that year ...more
Rachel
*thank you to to Netgalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review*

3 stars.

As an introvert I thought that this would be right up my alley. And to some degree it was. I could relate to certain parts of it but there was still a lot that made me realise just how much of an introvert I am as I felt that the people in these short stories were more outgoing than I am, so for that reason there was a lot that didn't interest me or that I could relate to.
...more
The Captain
May 28, 2019 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonfiction
Ahoy there me mateys! I received this memoir eARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. So here be me honest musings . . .

Okay so I be an introvert from an entire family of very extroverted people. The ma can meet and talk to anyone and makes life-long friends everywhere she goes. Me sis loves parties and tons of people hanging out at her house. I be a tough ol' salt who has a withering glare, a distaste for crowds, and a cutless for prodding if ye get too close. And yet I be the
...more
Emma
Aug 20, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I absolutely loved this!

Even though I am not a shy introvert but a “normal” introvert, this was super relatable. The writing is fun and easy to read, and I had to laugh out loud while reading certain paragraphs.

With regards to genre, I would put this somewhere between self-help and an autobiography/memoir. This setup can be very hit and miss for me, but in this case it turned out great.

I am now very curious about Jessica Pan’s other book and will probably pick it up in the future.
Genevieve Trono
I was totally intrigued when I saw the title of this book. I am a social introvert and I enjoyed this lighthearted but relatable non-fiction book that read like an engaging novel.

As a shy introvert frequently known as a "shintrovert", Jessica Pan decided to take a year to step out of her shell and enter the "extroverted world". After a family crisis in her family turned into a light bulb moment she realized she was lacking in the friend's department. She decided to take this time to focus on
...more
Jen
Jul 07, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: netgalley
This book was at turns hilarious and caused much head-nodding by this reader in agreement and wonder. Yes, apparently many people think and feel the same way about various social interactions. It is always a comfort to realize you are not the only one to feel a certain way.

This author may not be a natural at stand-up comedy, BUT she completely blew me away with her writing. I understand that some of that credit goes to editors, Beta-readers, etc., but the meat of the book is HER. And she is
...more
Montzalee Wittmann
Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come
One Introvert's Year of Saying Yes
by Jessica Pan
This is a book I requested from NetGalley and the review is voluntary.
This is a witty and clever book that I enjoyed reading. I can say relate to some of it. It has humor and is a good feeling book. I did find she repeated herself a lot. Worth the read.
Anna
Sep 05, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Anna by: Rebecca
This review has been delayed by four days thanks to a) the distraction of Brexit mayhem, and b) having three visitors (two humans, one husky) to stay, but this is no reflection upon the book. I thoroughly enjoyed Jessica Pan’s voyage into the unfamiliar world of extroversion. After finding herself lonely in London because all her friends had moved away, she decided to spend a year trying practically everything that seems scary and off-putting to a shy introvert. She recounts in engaging and very ...more
Jennifer
May 05, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This is the EXACTLY the book I needed.

I don't think I have ever written a book, but reading this one makes me think I have. I too am a 30 something, shy, introverted, small town Texas girl who has no idea how to have a conversation (that doesn't involve ghosts or dogs) or make friends. I'm not Chinese, Aries or named Jessica (Pan) but I would have been if my cousin hadn't been born first, forcing my Mom to "get creative" and name me Jennifer (Ann) instead. The title of this book caught my
...more
Jen
May 19, 2019 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
This is a tricky one to review, in that Jessica Pan's writing is quite good in an informal, chatty, magazine style and is clearly well researched - but I'm not really sure about the concept.

The synopsis is: "An introvert spends a year trying to live like an extrovert with hilarious results and advice for readers along the way..." In a time where we have had Susan Cain's book "Quiet", which Pan even makes reference to, it seems a shame that introverts still feel they need to try to be something
...more
Grumpus
Jul 13, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: miscellaneous
The grumpus23 (23-word commentary)
Making friends is hard for anyone, especially for introverts. Hilarity ensues as author learns and lives life as an extrovert for a year.
Meagan
Jan 09, 2020 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: memoir, nonfiction
Jessica Pan, self proclaimed "shintrovert" (shy introvert), decides to extrovert to the extreme for one year. Among other things, she signs up for improv classes, travels solo, does The Moth, and performs stand up comedy.

Overall, I really liked Pan's tone and voice. She's relatable and funny and feels like a friend. She interviews multiple social gurus about introversion, charisma, and public speaking anxiety. There's tons of great advice here - how to make friends after college (I've wondered!)
...more
Howard
Jan 17, 2020 rated it it was amazing
4.5 Stars for Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come: An Introvert’s Year in Living Dangerously (audiobook) by Jessica Pan read by the author. If you really liked Quiet by Susan Cain you should read this. You may enjoy this book or it may freak you out. This is a good example of someone challenging themself to being more outgoing. It’s good to know we can adapt it we put our minds to it. I wish these books were written forty years ago.
Sarah
Sep 28, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: favorites, 2019-list
Introverts CAN have all the fun, or at least write about it in a way that has the rest of us laughing and turning the pages like our fingers are on fire...

Guilty: I totally picked this book up because the title made me laugh. (And the cover was cute, too.)

‟I assumed that life as a shy introvert would go on this way for me forever,” Jessica Pan writes in the introduction. ‟But then, something unusual happened: I found myself roasting in a sauna, clutching a copy of Men’s Health, wearing a
...more
McKenzie/literarydragon
Published May 28th
I received an ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
If you’re an introvert go get a copy of this book!

full review can be found here: https://www.literarydragonreviews.web...

OMG! This book! It was like reading a mirror. In my notes I wrote “this lady might actually be me.” I mean she even moved to China and took a job that terrified her. I took a job in China that forced me to spend 18 hours a week teaching a class of strangers and the other 22 hours planning
...more
Jeannette
Apr 21, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Introverts and Extroverts who want to understand Introverts
Shelves: netgalley, reviewed
Upfront, I received a free copy of this book from Net Galley in exchange for possibly reviewing it.

I LOVED this book. I am an Introvert with a Myers-Briggs I. This book was on my TBR as soon as I saw the title. I'm not a shintrovert like the author. I have to pretend to be an extrovert for work, and it is exhausting! What's a shintrovert? Read the book. Still, I could relate to her story on so many levels. Oddly enough, I have also lived in Beijing and London. I know exactly the challenges she's
...more
Karen
Apr 20, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
As a fellow introvert, I can definitely relate to a lot of Jessica Pan's experiences and struggles. Pan had a goal of breaking out of her shell and enlisted the help and advice of some experts along the way. Her story is shared with lots of insight and plenty of humor. This book was a lot of fun to read and I learned a few things too. While I won't be signing up for stand-up classes anytime soon, I definitely could benefit from breaking out of my own shell a bit more often. Thanks, Jessica, for ...more
Renee (itsbooktalk)
I mentioned awhile back that I had bought this based purely on the title. I’m definitely an introvert and wanted to see how much of myself I could see in the book as well as how the author challenged herself to live like an extrovert for a year. Conclusion: I saw ALOT of myself in the book and much of the extroverted behaviors the author challenged herself to do made me say to myself, I’d never do that. By the end, it also made me say, sometimes it wouldn’t hurt to try...except improv & ...more
het meisje zonder naam
Oct 10, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 4-stars
This is a really interesting book with the best audiobook.

I wish I had this book five years ago, because I think over the years I have also become much less shy.

This book was more of a fun, hilarious and culture-reference filled story than a big revelation. Nothing really shocking but still I had a great time.
Rachel Kapelke-Dale
Made me laugh so much! I loved the "mentors" along the way. Plus I loved the adventures in London, Paris, Edinburgh, and the forest. Funny, inspiring, brilliant.
Stella
Jan 13, 2020 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: introvert
An introvert pushes herself to live through a year of extroverting, trying to make new friends after her old ones move away. This book was sometimes excruciating to read because it took me way outside my comfort zone along with her. She tries stand-up comedy not once but three times! Crazy. In the end it is cathartic. It is okay to be an introvert, but just as extroverts can try meditating and other introverted activities, we too can try on some of the traits of extroverts...sometimes ...more
Michelle
Jessica Pan is an introvert and it is extremely difficult for her to make friends. She bails on engagements, is terrible at small talk, and the only friend she really has his her husband Sam.

She decides to change all of this by going out into the world and researching the best ways to connect to people and gives herself a year to really make a change.

This books takes her from Improv to learning how to have a meaningful conversation with another person.

It’s lighthearted, funny, and a bit of a
...more
Dini Kamayana
I absolutely loved this book! I honestly don't know why it took me so long to finish it and I'm sorry that I didn't get to it even sooner; although I'm convinced that I picked it up when I really needed it most. I've already recommended it to countless friends who've mentioned something in passing and my brain would ping back to things mentioned in this book. It's not a self-help book but it's filled with such relatable experiences. Not only that but Jessica was just downright hilarious! I don't ...more
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241 followers

Half-Chinese American living in London. Graduate of Brown University. Big fan of dogs, coconut smoothies and traveling.

My second book, SORRY I'M LATE, I DIDN'T WANT TO COME is out in May 2019.

It's about the year I spent: talking to strangers, performing stand-up comedy, travelling solo, trying out improv, going on friend dates and doing a bunch of extrovert-y things. I interview brilliant people
...more
“I’m in search of something more than a new place, though. I’m in search of a feeling and a state of being: that magical time when you can’t possibly predict what’s going to happen next or whom you are going to meet or where they are going to take you. In this state, everything flows, every surprise is a delight, and new people guide you to special adventures.” 3 likes
“Social anxiety is a completely normal experience. We are social animals. We want to be accepted by our peer groups and we do not want to be rejected. If people do not have any social anxiety, something is seriously wrong with them.” 3 likes
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