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Trials of Fear #5
Cravings of the Heart
For years, Arden McMillan has been hiding his phobia in plain sight. People can believe whatever they want to believe about him so long as they never learn the truth. It’s easier to lie than to be seen as a coward. Besides, it’s no one’s business but his own.It’s been ten years since Ignatius Rojas—or Iggy—has seen Arden. Their reunion doesn’t suit either of their families, but their connection is hard to ignore.The problem is, Iggy sees behind Arden’s masks. He sees the way Arden is slowly killing himself, and he can only ignore it for so long. If he can’t break through Arden’s tough shell and convince him he needs help, he could end up burying the man he’s growing to love.
302 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 25, 2019
197 people are currently reading
760 people want to read
About the author
Nicky James
77 books2,279 followersI live in the small town of Petrolia, Ontario, Canada and I am a mother to a wonderful teenage boy (didn't think those words could be typed together...surprise) and wife to a truly supportive and understanding husband, who thankfully doesn't think I'm crazy.
I have always had two profound dreams in life. To fall back hundreds of years in time and live in a simpler world, not bogged down by technology and to write novels. Since only one of these was a possibility I decided to make the other come alive on paper.
I write mm romance novels that take place in fantastical medieval type settings and love to use the challenges of the times to give my stories and characters life.
I have always had two profound dreams in life. To fall back hundreds of years in time and live in a simpler world, not bogged down by technology and to write novels. Since only one of these was a possibility I decided to make the other come alive on paper.
I write mm romance novels that take place in fantastical medieval type settings and love to use the challenges of the times to give my stories and characters life.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 209 reviews
August 7, 2019
This series has stolen my heart. I feel for all the MCs and have learned so much about phobias.
In Cravings of the Heart the phobia is a fear of food. Arden lost his twin sister to botulism six years prior and is afraid of contaminated food and dying as a result of eating something tainted or not prepared correctly. He reads labels, checks expiration dates, and inspects every morsel of food that goes in his mouth. At 5'6", Arden weighs less than 100 pounds, which is shockingly skinny.
Iggy, Arden's oldest brother's best friend, remembers Arden as a 10-year-old boy, but 20-year-old Arden is all grown up. Iggy finds an immediate connection with Arden, despite Arden's ultra Catholic family having been cruel to Iggy when he came out.
Iggy, a paramedic, is absolutely wonderful. He's a natural caretaker, looking after his mom, who's blind. Iggy is the only one who sees beyond what Arden projects to the world; he's the only one who realizes that Arden is not anorexic. Arden knows he's too thin. He's ashamed of his emaciated body, but the thought of eating anything other than the foods on his "safe list" (saltines, ramen, toast, and apples) makes him panic.
Arden's religious family, particularly his parents and his older brother and sister (Arden has eight siblings), play a big role in the story. I'm not sure I entirely believed his dad's change of heart at the end, but my view of religion is negatively skewed.
This is a beautiful story about healing and recovery, with a slow burn and a few sensual scenes between the MCs. The ending is very hopeful. I felt like Arden, with Iggy's support, was going to be okay.
In Cravings of the Heart the phobia is a fear of food. Arden lost his twin sister to botulism six years prior and is afraid of contaminated food and dying as a result of eating something tainted or not prepared correctly. He reads labels, checks expiration dates, and inspects every morsel of food that goes in his mouth. At 5'6", Arden weighs less than 100 pounds, which is shockingly skinny.
Iggy, Arden's oldest brother's best friend, remembers Arden as a 10-year-old boy, but 20-year-old Arden is all grown up. Iggy finds an immediate connection with Arden, despite Arden's ultra Catholic family having been cruel to Iggy when he came out.
Iggy, a paramedic, is absolutely wonderful. He's a natural caretaker, looking after his mom, who's blind. Iggy is the only one who sees beyond what Arden projects to the world; he's the only one who realizes that Arden is not anorexic. Arden knows he's too thin. He's ashamed of his emaciated body, but the thought of eating anything other than the foods on his "safe list" (saltines, ramen, toast, and apples) makes him panic.
Arden's religious family, particularly his parents and his older brother and sister (Arden has eight siblings), play a big role in the story. I'm not sure I entirely believed his dad's change of heart at the end, but my view of religion is negatively skewed.
This is a beautiful story about healing and recovery, with a slow burn and a few sensual scenes between the MCs. The ending is very hopeful. I felt like Arden, with Iggy's support, was going to be okay.
December 29, 2021
*some spoilers ahead*
I'm going to honest here, folks: I did not enjoy Cravings of the Heart.
I'm going to have to face facts and admit that Nicky James might not be for me. I DNFed another book in the Trials by Fear series, and I barely made it through this one. However, so many of my friends love this author that it's painful to just give up, but I might have to do it.
My personal opinion is that Cravings of the Heart was riddled with issues. It was BANANAS to me that people couldn't make the extremely simple connection between Arden's twin sister dying of botulism from FOOD and him being afraid of eating. It was incredibly dumb, and made absolutely no sense. No one in his family notices?? Not even Iggy, who knew how his sister died??? I would just assume he would be terrified to eat if I was in that family.
Fine, aside from that, I thought Arden was just overall pretty bratty and demanding. He acted like a child, and I had a hard time picturing him in an adult relationship. Iggy catered to him way too much, even when Arden was obnoxious, and then became smooshy and insta-lovey with him way too early. I didn't love their dynamics and I didn't buy their relationship.
While the narration was good, I still almost DNFed it because I was rolling my eyes so much. YES, I know this makes me stand out amongst all of my friends who loved this book and this series. I'm literally one of a handful of my friends who didn't adore this one. Maybe it was my mood, maybe it was the writing style, but this series is just not for me.
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September 11, 2025
Book safety, content warnings, and tropes & tags down below.
Eating was a grueling task. A process I’d learned to hate. Nothing was safe, and it was an ongoing battle with my mind to keep enough food down so I wouldn’t die.
I’m pretty sure I say the same thing every time I read a Nicky James book, but this author can write the hell out of a serious subject. You can tell she approaches it with respect and sensitivity each time, and the result is a well written beautiful book about heavy themes. This one is no different.
I can’t even imagine the exhaustion of being afraid of food, but living it through Arden in this book was powerful, and he made me want to cry and rage with him out of frustration and worry. Like that phobia isn’t a big enough challenge, he has to deal with a very religious and bigoted family with zero understanding or patience for his issues. It was hard to read at times, but I couldn’t put the book down until I finished it. There is a lot of drama going on here, but it didn’t feel gratuitous either.
My heart did a little excited skip as I remembered those days of falling over my feet, loving him as only a kid with a life-consuming crush did.
Arden reminded me of Victor Lang (Hold Me Under by Riley Nash) at times. He was so closed off and afraid of being vulnerable, that he turned the prickliness up to ten and built his walls so high no one could see over them. He kept lying/playing along with other people’s assumptions about him (being anorexic) instead of disclosing his phobia.
His love interest, Iggy, is perfect. Not actually, but pretty freaking close. He has a world of patience and a massive heart of gold. He definitely has a need to help anyone and everyone, but the way he supports and helps Arden, even when he doesn’t know what is going on, was amazing. He deserves a spot on the list of top book boyfriends, without a doubt.
I wondered for a minute if this cockiness was a façade, and if deep down, living surrounded by hatred was slowly tearing him apart.
This book deals heavily with disordered eating, body image and weight issues, but not in a way you would usually see. This is very much based on a phobia and anxiety. It’s tough to read at times, but Arden and Iggy are very solid together. I very highly recommend this book.
I must add (this is another typical one for me), I feel like maybe the bigoted family got a second chance a little too soon/too easily, even though it was a tough road getting there. I’m not at all a very forgiving person, but I guess I wanted them to work for it a little harder, lol.
Eating gave me that same overwhelming fear some people might get just before jumping out of an airplane. It swamped me, coating rational thought, and wouldn’t let me go.
Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️
⚠️ Tropes & tags ⚠️
Age gap
Brothers best friend
Phobia
Anxiety
Childhood crush
Interracial relationship
Hurt/comfort
EMT worker
Fashion designer (college student)
⚠️⚠️ Content warning ⚠️⚠️
Explicit sexual content
Eating disorder
Homophobia
Medical emergency
Religious bigotry
Near death experience (MC)
Cibophobia (fear of food)
Death of a sibling (off page, past, a few details)
⚠️⚠️⚠️ Book safety ⚠️⚠️⚠️
Cheating: No
OM/OW drama: No
Third-act breakup: No, but three weeks of no contact after first date.
POV: 1st person, dual POV
Genre: Contemporary romance, M/M
Strict roles or versatile: Versatile. No switching on page.
Lying was a huge no-no in the McMillan house. The problem was, I lied so often no one noticed the difference. Telling the truth at this point would have probably stood out more. How are you feeling? Fine. Did you eat? Yes. Did you say your prayers? Of course. How was your study date with Malcolm? Great! Lies. Lies. Lies, and I didn’t have a study date with Malcolm, I hooked up with a guy at school, and he sucked me off in the back seat of his Fiesta. Oops. Yup, still gay. I guess the good Lord hasn’t cured me yet.
All the butterflies that had followed me into his house earlier withered and died.
Eating was a grueling task. A process I’d learned to hate. Nothing was safe, and it was an ongoing battle with my mind to keep enough food down so I wouldn’t die.
I’m pretty sure I say the same thing every time I read a Nicky James book, but this author can write the hell out of a serious subject. You can tell she approaches it with respect and sensitivity each time, and the result is a well written beautiful book about heavy themes. This one is no different.
I can’t even imagine the exhaustion of being afraid of food, but living it through Arden in this book was powerful, and he made me want to cry and rage with him out of frustration and worry. Like that phobia isn’t a big enough challenge, he has to deal with a very religious and bigoted family with zero understanding or patience for his issues. It was hard to read at times, but I couldn’t put the book down until I finished it. There is a lot of drama going on here, but it didn’t feel gratuitous either.
My heart did a little excited skip as I remembered those days of falling over my feet, loving him as only a kid with a life-consuming crush did.
Arden reminded me of Victor Lang (Hold Me Under by Riley Nash) at times. He was so closed off and afraid of being vulnerable, that he turned the prickliness up to ten and built his walls so high no one could see over them. He kept lying/playing along with other people’s assumptions about him (being anorexic) instead of disclosing his phobia.
His love interest, Iggy, is perfect. Not actually, but pretty freaking close. He has a world of patience and a massive heart of gold. He definitely has a need to help anyone and everyone, but the way he supports and helps Arden, even when he doesn’t know what is going on, was amazing. He deserves a spot on the list of top book boyfriends, without a doubt.
I wondered for a minute if this cockiness was a façade, and if deep down, living surrounded by hatred was slowly tearing him apart.
This book deals heavily with disordered eating, body image and weight issues, but not in a way you would usually see. This is very much based on a phobia and anxiety. It’s tough to read at times, but Arden and Iggy are very solid together. I very highly recommend this book.
I must add (this is another typical one for me), I feel like maybe the bigoted family got a second chance a little too soon/too easily, even though it was a tough road getting there. I’m not at all a very forgiving person, but I guess I wanted them to work for it a little harder, lol.
Eating gave me that same overwhelming fear some people might get just before jumping out of an airplane. It swamped me, coating rational thought, and wouldn’t let me go.
Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️
⚠️ Tropes & tags ⚠️
Age gap
Brothers best friend
Phobia
Anxiety
Childhood crush
Interracial relationship
Hurt/comfort
EMT worker
Fashion designer (college student)
⚠️⚠️ Content warning ⚠️⚠️
Explicit sexual content
Eating disorder
Homophobia
Medical emergency
Religious bigotry
Near death experience (MC)
Cibophobia (fear of food)
Death of a sibling (off page, past, a few details)
⚠️⚠️⚠️ Book safety ⚠️⚠️⚠️
Cheating: No
OM/OW drama: No
Third-act breakup: No, but three weeks of no contact after first date.
POV: 1st person, dual POV
Genre: Contemporary romance, M/M
Strict roles or versatile: Versatile. No switching on page.
Lying was a huge no-no in the McMillan house. The problem was, I lied so often no one noticed the difference. Telling the truth at this point would have probably stood out more. How are you feeling? Fine. Did you eat? Yes. Did you say your prayers? Of course. How was your study date with Malcolm? Great! Lies. Lies. Lies, and I didn’t have a study date with Malcolm, I hooked up with a guy at school, and he sucked me off in the back seat of his Fiesta. Oops. Yup, still gay. I guess the good Lord hasn’t cured me yet.
All the butterflies that had followed me into his house earlier withered and died.
March 28, 2022
I loved this book. I loved Arden. Tiny, broken, terrified, fierce Arden. I loved Iggy. Big, strong, supportive Iggy.
I was fascinated with Arden’s phobia. Fear of food. It hit a little close to home, with my teenager struggling with the beginning of an eating disorder, and my husband struggling with OCD and orthorexia. Iggy has all my respect. I must say I am not as perfect and patient when my husband panics after asking me ten times if I think his second tuna sandwich of the week will overload his body with mercury.
I hate Iggy’s family. Especially Phoenix. Although I forgave him later. I couldn’t understand how Iggy could be friends with such a jerk. I couldn’t understand why Phoenix saw his brother suffering and hated him for it. Families are complicated, but this one infuriated me.
I really enjoyed this entire series. I love reading about mental health issues, and this was super interesting and different.
I was fascinated with Arden’s phobia. Fear of food. It hit a little close to home, with my teenager struggling with the beginning of an eating disorder, and my husband struggling with OCD and orthorexia. Iggy has all my respect. I must say I am not as perfect and patient when my husband panics after asking me ten times if I think his second tuna sandwich of the week will overload his body with mercury.
I hate Iggy’s family. Especially Phoenix. Although I forgave him later. I couldn’t understand how Iggy could be friends with such a jerk. I couldn’t understand why Phoenix saw his brother suffering and hated him for it. Families are complicated, but this one infuriated me.
I really enjoyed this entire series. I love reading about mental health issues, and this was super interesting and different.
February 25, 2020
Re-read February 2020
Still such a wonderful read.
-------------------------------------
4.5 stars
This was quite a nice surprise!
I’m not really a fan of Nicky James’ writing style. I often find it a bit too depressing and overly detailed in places while I feel things are skipped in others. But that being said, I’m super interested in people with phobias. And a fear of eating sounded so so good! And I was glad I took the chance, because I really liked this book (even though I wasn't a fan of other books in the series).
Arden is 20 years old and still living with his parents. Things are tense at home because his parents are super religious and don’t really accept him being gay. But Arden feels lucky they at least didn’t kick him out.
When Arden was 14 years old he and his twin sister got botulism and his sister died. After that Arden has had trouble eating food. He is now at a place where he has so much fear of food and how sick he can get, that he can only eat crackers, an apple, noodles or peanut butter. And this only after examining every piece carefully. But it’s still a struggle and his anxiety is through the roof every time he eats, so he doesn’t eat a lot.
His parents think he is anorexic and have pushed him to have counseling sessions with the church counselor. But since Arden is not anorexic it’s completely futile.
When Arden falls down the stairs at school he recognizes one of the EMTs. It is Iggy, his older brother’s best friend. Arden used to have such a crush on Iggy when he was younger.
Iggy knows he shouldn’t be interested in a McMillan, since the family treated him like crap when he came out 9 years ago, but he can’t help but be attracted to the small, sweet Arden.
Arden and Iggy start out as friends, but it’s not long before both agree they want something more. But Arden has his food issues and he’s afraid to tell Iggy about them…
I loved these guys together. Iggy was such a sweetheart. He and Arden were very cute together. And even though Arden could be snarky, he was also vulnerable and just so very sweet.
I did have one thing that bothered me. Arden’s brother, 29 year old Phoenix, acted like a 16 year old and never truly redeemed himself in my eyes. Yes, he did eventually admit he was wrong, but I was so shocked by how hateful he was towards Arden before, that I thought he should have groveled some more. I mean who calls their brother an attention whore at the dinner table in front of the whole family? Or call Arden a lying, manipulative piece of shit several times? Wasn’t Phoenix supposed to be almost 30? He acted so juvenile. And since he was Iggy’s best friend I had a hard time seeing him like someone Iggy could be friends with.
But besides this issue I really liked the rest. I couldn’t quite put it down so I stayed up past by bedtime to read more. A fear of food is just so interesting!
Still such a wonderful read.
-------------------------------------
4.5 stars
This was quite a nice surprise!
I’m not really a fan of Nicky James’ writing style. I often find it a bit too depressing and overly detailed in places while I feel things are skipped in others. But that being said, I’m super interested in people with phobias. And a fear of eating sounded so so good! And I was glad I took the chance, because I really liked this book (even though I wasn't a fan of other books in the series).
Arden is 20 years old and still living with his parents. Things are tense at home because his parents are super religious and don’t really accept him being gay. But Arden feels lucky they at least didn’t kick him out.
When Arden was 14 years old he and his twin sister got botulism and his sister died. After that Arden has had trouble eating food. He is now at a place where he has so much fear of food and how sick he can get, that he can only eat crackers, an apple, noodles or peanut butter. And this only after examining every piece carefully. But it’s still a struggle and his anxiety is through the roof every time he eats, so he doesn’t eat a lot.
His parents think he is anorexic and have pushed him to have counseling sessions with the church counselor. But since Arden is not anorexic it’s completely futile.
When Arden falls down the stairs at school he recognizes one of the EMTs. It is Iggy, his older brother’s best friend. Arden used to have such a crush on Iggy when he was younger.
Iggy knows he shouldn’t be interested in a McMillan, since the family treated him like crap when he came out 9 years ago, but he can’t help but be attracted to the small, sweet Arden.
Arden and Iggy start out as friends, but it’s not long before both agree they want something more. But Arden has his food issues and he’s afraid to tell Iggy about them…
I loved these guys together. Iggy was such a sweetheart. He and Arden were very cute together. And even though Arden could be snarky, he was also vulnerable and just so very sweet.
I did have one thing that bothered me. Arden’s brother, 29 year old Phoenix, acted like a 16 year old and never truly redeemed himself in my eyes. Yes, he did eventually admit he was wrong, but I was so shocked by how hateful he was towards Arden before, that I thought he should have groveled some more. I mean who calls their brother an attention whore at the dinner table in front of the whole family? Or call Arden a lying, manipulative piece of shit several times? Wasn’t Phoenix supposed to be almost 30? He acted so juvenile. And since he was Iggy’s best friend I had a hard time seeing him like someone Iggy could be friends with.
But besides this issue I really liked the rest. I couldn’t quite put it down so I stayed up past by bedtime to read more. A fear of food is just so interesting!
August 9, 2022
Audio - 5++++++ Stars
Story - 5 Stars!
Story - 5 Stars!
January 23, 2026
⭐️ 4 stars ⭐️
I think this last installment is the first where I enjoyed the story more than the characters. The formula is the same as the others, but the fear of food was fascinating and heartbreaking at the same time.
As for the romance, it was sweet but I’m not completely sure I liked Arden. I can understand why he is the way he is — it’s survival, it’s coping with something he didn’t think anyone could understand, but still. He wasn’t entirely likable. Iggy was great. Loving and caring. The perfect boyfriend.
All that being said, I still loved this entire series, flaws and all. The endings are very fairytale-esque, but they’re still great comfort reads. Hurt/comfort to the max, sweet love stories with happy happy endings.
CW and NSFW info (spoilers):
- Homophobia
- Religious bigotry
- Medical emergency
- Eating disorder
- Cibophobia (fear of food)
- Poor self-image
- Death of a sibling (past)
- Mention of parental abandonment (past)
- Mention of cheating (not MCs)
- Age gap (9 years)
- Top/bottom
- Frotting
What everyone saw as picky and selective eating was truly an ingrained fear I couldn’t escape or admit to.
I think this last installment is the first where I enjoyed the story more than the characters. The formula is the same as the others, but the fear of food was fascinating and heartbreaking at the same time.
Slowly but surely, a little at a time, Arden was stealing my heart.
As for the romance, it was sweet but I’m not completely sure I liked Arden. I can understand why he is the way he is — it’s survival, it’s coping with something he didn’t think anyone could understand, but still. He wasn’t entirely likable. Iggy was great. Loving and caring. The perfect boyfriend.
“Nunca estarás sólo. Estoy contigo. Siempre. Mi corazón. Mi alma. Mi vida.”
All that being said, I still loved this entire series, flaws and all. The endings are very fairytale-esque, but they’re still great comfort reads. Hurt/comfort to the max, sweet love stories with happy happy endings.
“I can hear your heart beating,” he whispered into the coming day. “It’s yours. It craves you. Always has.”
“Mine.”
CW and NSFW info (spoilers):
- Homophobia
- Religious bigotry
- Medical emergency
- Eating disorder
- Cibophobia (fear of food)
- Poor self-image
- Death of a sibling (past)
- Mention of parental abandonment (past)
- Mention of cheating (not MCs)
- Age gap (9 years)
- Top/bottom
- Frotting
February 18, 2023
Arden and Iggy. What a lovely couple they turned out to be!
This wasn't my favorite of the series but I enjoyed it nevertheless.
It was easy to fall for Iggy but Arden was prickly. I was kept at arm's length because of his attitude. This was how Arden covered up his phobia- with defiance and sass, to the point he was almost bratty. And of course, that wasn't really him, just his defense mechanisms.
But oh, how I adore Iggy. I love his quiet patient tender heart. I love how strong and honest he was, always confronting obstacles and challenges head on. I loved his relationship with his mother. And I grew to love his best friend, who just so happened to be Arden's brother.
This particular phobia, fear of food, was interesting to discover. I can't imagine the pains Arden went through to eat. Arden's family wasn't a joy to be around but I appreciated how they tried to open their hearts, heads, and arms by the end.
Another powerful addition to this AMAZING series.
I'm so sad it's coming to an end.
*4 crush-became-love stars*
This wasn't my favorite of the series but I enjoyed it nevertheless.
It was easy to fall for Iggy but Arden was prickly. I was kept at arm's length because of his attitude. This was how Arden covered up his phobia- with defiance and sass, to the point he was almost bratty. And of course, that wasn't really him, just his defense mechanisms.
But oh, how I adore Iggy. I love his quiet patient tender heart. I love how strong and honest he was, always confronting obstacles and challenges head on. I loved his relationship with his mother. And I grew to love his best friend, who just so happened to be Arden's brother.
This particular phobia, fear of food, was interesting to discover. I can't imagine the pains Arden went through to eat. Arden's family wasn't a joy to be around but I appreciated how they tried to open their hearts, heads, and arms by the end.
Another powerful addition to this AMAZING series.
I'm so sad it's coming to an end.
*4 crush-became-love stars*
April 29, 2019
This series just gets better and better. Iggy and Arden were aborable. Loved how Iggy was so patient with Arden. But dammmn those parents. I just can't. ugggh
That ending though...... Aaaaaach makes me so excited to know
Give me that last installment.
May 7, 2019
Ugh. I really struggled with this one. Arden, Iggy, Arden's family. Just ugh.
Mostly I think I had a hard time with Arden's age. He was young. Very, very young and honestly left to his own devices and something just didn't sit right about that with me. So, I struggled.
Hi family, although I know I am supposed to get it, I really, really disliked. There were so many of them I don't know how Arden was supposed to even get what he needed. I come from a home that it was "as long as you live under my roof" and not always in a bad way. In a respectful way. I just can't imagine my Mom watching me disappear and not getting me help. I just can't even imagine. His brother Phoenix was just not a redeemable character as far as I am concerned. He was a dick. And a coward and a total hypocrite. I don't know how any of the million of them didn't realize Arden losing his twin at FOURTEEN could possibly be a problem.
Fucking religion man.
Iggy. As is the formula with this series, he was an amazing man. All around a great guy. I just don't know if I totally got the connection he felt with Arden. Yes, I know he found him gorgeous, although he had to look very, very unhealthy. I know he felt protective. He wanted to keep him safe, he wanted to help him. I get all that. And, I know they talked for hours, we were told they did. I just maybe needed to see some it for a better foundation.
I ended up of course loving them together and ended up feeling something between the two of them but there was a lot of the story I just was unsure.
Anyway, one of the more difficult phobias for sure. As a person who loves food I just can't even imagine.
Oh my GOD I can't wait for the next one!
Mostly I think I had a hard time with Arden's age. He was young. Very, very young and honestly left to his own devices and something just didn't sit right about that with me. So, I struggled.
Hi family, although I know I am supposed to get it, I really, really disliked. There were so many of them I don't know how Arden was supposed to even get what he needed. I come from a home that it was "as long as you live under my roof" and not always in a bad way. In a respectful way. I just can't imagine my Mom watching me disappear and not getting me help. I just can't even imagine. His brother Phoenix was just not a redeemable character as far as I am concerned. He was a dick. And a coward and a total hypocrite. I don't know how any of the million of them didn't realize Arden losing his twin at FOURTEEN could possibly be a problem.
Fucking religion man.
Iggy. As is the formula with this series, he was an amazing man. All around a great guy. I just don't know if I totally got the connection he felt with Arden. Yes, I know he found him gorgeous, although he had to look very, very unhealthy. I know he felt protective. He wanted to keep him safe, he wanted to help him. I get all that. And, I know they talked for hours, we were told they did. I just maybe needed to see some it for a better foundation.
I ended up of course loving them together and ended up feeling something between the two of them but there was a lot of the story I just was unsure.
Anyway, one of the more difficult phobias for sure. As a person who loves food I just can't even imagine.
Oh my GOD I can't wait for the next one!
January 13, 2022
Cibophobia: A fear of food.
I hated Arden's family. Especially his big brother Phoenix and his parents...
But after Iggy came in the picture, who realized that something was waay wrong after watching Arden's signals carefully, I could breathe a sigh of relief.
I really loved how he supported Arden every step of the way, made the thickheaded Phoenix finally see the truth and how, with his help, they brought Arden's parents to their senses...
I really loved the whole series. Wish I'd read it sooner
With this book, I think we are coming to the end of the main phobias introduced in the series.
We took a peek at an environment where all the MC's got together in a group therapy session. I really enjoyed to see the other MC's here and there.
In the next book, they will all come together at Dr. Kelby's conference so I can't wait to read it.
I hated Arden's family. Especially his big brother Phoenix and his parents...
But after Iggy came in the picture, who realized that something was waay wrong after watching Arden's signals carefully, I could breathe a sigh of relief.
I really loved how he supported Arden every step of the way, made the thickheaded Phoenix finally see the truth and how, with his help, they brought Arden's parents to their senses...
I really loved the whole series. Wish I'd read it sooner
With this book, I think we are coming to the end of the main phobias introduced in the series.
We took a peek at an environment where all the MC's got together in a group therapy session. I really enjoyed to see the other MC's here and there.
In the next book, they will all come together at Dr. Kelby's conference so I can't wait to read it.
August 24, 2020
3.5 rounded down
I put off reading this one for awhile because I knew it was food related and that can be a pretty triggering space for me, but I ended up quite enjoying it! Arven's phobia, while it does prevent him from eating or getting adequate nutrition (and presents a lot like anorexia) it's not motivated by fatphobia and diet culture, so it didn't end up personally bringing anything up for me.
I thought the characters were really lovely and the way the author captured Arven's phobia was really wonderfully and sensitively done. I will say, while I did love that aspect, I ended up not feeling super connected to the romance piece. It seemed to move a little faster than I really felt from the characters, though not in an insta-love kind of way but more of a "there is so much going on it's hard to really develop a romance in the midst of that". I really connected to Arven and his struggles, but ultimately just didn't feel the passion between him and Iggy. I also found Phoenix's (Arven's brother) to be a little OTT with his judgemental assholery, especially because he switches *so* quick to be the good guy--I had a hard time understanding that this good guy character would have really let himself be so mean and clueless for so long, it didn't really ring authentic to me.
I put off reading this one for awhile because I knew it was food related and that can be a pretty triggering space for me, but I ended up quite enjoying it! Arven's phobia, while it does prevent him from eating or getting adequate nutrition (and presents a lot like anorexia) it's not motivated by fatphobia and diet culture, so it didn't end up personally bringing anything up for me.
I thought the characters were really lovely and the way the author captured Arven's phobia was really wonderfully and sensitively done. I will say, while I did love that aspect, I ended up not feeling super connected to the romance piece. It seemed to move a little faster than I really felt from the characters, though not in an insta-love kind of way but more of a "there is so much going on it's hard to really develop a romance in the midst of that". I really connected to Arven and his struggles, but ultimately just didn't feel the passion between him and Iggy. I also found Phoenix's (Arven's brother) to be a little OTT with his judgemental assholery, especially because he switches *so* quick to be the good guy--I had a hard time understanding that this good guy character would have really let himself be so mean and clueless for so long, it didn't really ring authentic to me.
April 5, 2021
⭐️ 3.75 ⭐️
October 19, 2020
Damn. I loved this book. Nicky James is truly a wonder.
Trials of fears is one of my favorite book series. Honestly, this book was perfect. Dude, Arden had it truly bad. It’s not really a competition, they all had it pretty bad. I mean, man, Fen feared sleep!
This book is so worth it. Arden is terrified of ingesting most foods after a traumatizing experience. He reconnects with his childhood crush Iggy and together they set down a path of healing, love, and acceptance.
The romance was adorable. this book had so much of my second best thing ever in the world after face kisses which is cuddling, and you know that thing...where you like, sit on someone’s lap, but like, not straddling them, but sitting sideways on their lap? And you tuck your head under their chin? Yeah. That. Exactly. I find it disgustingly endearing; Awwwwwww. I was literally swooning and crooning the entire time.
It was so sweet, yet, angsty. I don’t know how Nicky James pulled it off. But she did. She’s just awesome like that.
I loved going along Arden on his healing journey. It’d been a bumpy ride for everyone on board. The human condition will forever remain a source of awe and mystery to us all.
“I was scared to death,” he said when we came apart. His thumbs stroked my cheeks, and he kissed my eyelids one at a time, then my nose and forehead." 🥺❤️
Trials of fears is one of my favorite book series. Honestly, this book was perfect. Dude, Arden had it truly bad. It’s not really a competition, they all had it pretty bad. I mean, man, Fen feared sleep!
This book is so worth it. Arden is terrified of ingesting most foods after a traumatizing experience. He reconnects with his childhood crush Iggy and together they set down a path of healing, love, and acceptance.
The romance was adorable. this book had so much of my second best thing ever in the world after face kisses which is cuddling, and you know that thing...where you like, sit on someone’s lap, but like, not straddling them, but sitting sideways on their lap? And you tuck your head under their chin? Yeah. That. Exactly. I find it disgustingly endearing; Awwwwwww. I was literally swooning and crooning the entire time.
It was so sweet, yet, angsty. I don’t know how Nicky James pulled it off. But she did. She’s just awesome like that.
I loved going along Arden on his healing journey. It’d been a bumpy ride for everyone on board. The human condition will forever remain a source of awe and mystery to us all.
“I was scared to death,” he said when we came apart. His thumbs stroked my cheeks, and he kissed my eyelids one at a time, then my nose and forehead." 🥺❤️
June 20, 2019
Muy en la línea de los otros libros de la serie, una buena pareja que despierta mucha ternura, con uno de ellos con una fuerte fobia y el otro siendo el compañero ideal que muestra mucha comprensión a lo largo de todo el proceso de aceptación de esa fobia y tratamiento. Además, soy muy fan de la trope ¨enamorado del amigo de mi hermano". Me gusta esta serie, pero a veces es muy difícil leer cómo se sienten los protagonistas, la autora refleja muy bien la angustia del que padece de la fobia, y del que no sabe cómo ayudar y ve a su pareja sufrir.
May 27, 2019
*4,5 stars*
Another fabulous addition to this intriguing series!
Each book, btw, is a stand-alone, although some characters of previous books might pop up (like here Ireland from book 3).
This instalment deals with cibophobia, a fear of food.
It is heart-rending to watch how Arden tries to cope with his condition which he’s successfully hidden from everyone for 6 years. However, unlike other phobias, his is truly life threatening because he’s eating less and less and basically starving himself to death.
The fact that he’s bearing the burden alone makes everything so much worse. It’s tragic to watch him totally stuck in his situation because his deeply religious parents put him into an untenable situation.
Arden’s parents really really got to me. At 67% I nearly threw my kindle across the room out of sheer anger and frustration. WTH are these people thinking?
Not only do they treat him like a 5 year old and do not listen to him (he is almost 21), they also try to solve everything through prayer and religion when the young man needs real treatment!
Unsurprisingly events come to head when Arden’s organs start failing. And if it wasn’t for Iggy, I have no idea whether Arden would have actually survived.
Iggy is the best friend of Phoenix, Arden oldest brother. Now this is where things get quite complex. Due to Arden's parents who aren't only very religious but also very homophobic (again, they drove me completely up the wall!), Iggy and Phoenix's friendship's been in the closet for years, and Phoenix pretty much hates his little brother and tries to warn Iggy off him like mad.
However, Iggy (his full name is Ignatius, which makes me grin broadly for some reason) is one of those dreamboat boyfriends we all would like to have. As an EMT he is protective, sensitive, the ultimate carer and a healer at heart. And exactly what Arden needs.
The way he slowly figures out what Arden's problem is felt like a medical thriller. Nicky James did a brilliant job here!
I love my medical drama and this series is ticking a whole load of boxes in that respect!
So why not the full 5 stars rating?
Arden’s parents are, imo, extreme. Their 180 degree-change-around at the end doesn’t feel right and realistic. Phoenix also makes a similar journey, but I bought his lock, stock and barrel. Because he is a good guy at the end of the day.
Highly recommended.
Another fabulous addition to this intriguing series!
Each book, btw, is a stand-alone, although some characters of previous books might pop up (like here Ireland from book 3).
This instalment deals with cibophobia, a fear of food.
It is heart-rending to watch how Arden tries to cope with his condition which he’s successfully hidden from everyone for 6 years. However, unlike other phobias, his is truly life threatening because he’s eating less and less and basically starving himself to death.
The fact that he’s bearing the burden alone makes everything so much worse. It’s tragic to watch him totally stuck in his situation because his deeply religious parents put him into an untenable situation.
Arden’s parents really really got to me. At 67% I nearly threw my kindle across the room out of sheer anger and frustration. WTH are these people thinking?
Not only do they treat him like a 5 year old and do not listen to him (he is almost 21), they also try to solve everything through prayer and religion when the young man needs real treatment!
Unsurprisingly events come to head when Arden’s organs start failing. And if it wasn’t for Iggy, I have no idea whether Arden would have actually survived.
Iggy is the best friend of Phoenix, Arden oldest brother. Now this is where things get quite complex. Due to Arden's parents who aren't only very religious but also very homophobic (again, they drove me completely up the wall!), Iggy and Phoenix's friendship's been in the closet for years, and Phoenix pretty much hates his little brother and tries to warn Iggy off him like mad.
However, Iggy (his full name is Ignatius, which makes me grin broadly for some reason) is one of those dreamboat boyfriends we all would like to have. As an EMT he is protective, sensitive, the ultimate carer and a healer at heart. And exactly what Arden needs.
The way he slowly figures out what Arden's problem is felt like a medical thriller. Nicky James did a brilliant job here!
I love my medical drama and this series is ticking a whole load of boxes in that respect!
So why not the full 5 stars rating?
Arden’s parents are, imo, extreme. Their 180 degree-change-around at the end doesn’t feel right and realistic. Phoenix also makes a similar journey, but I bought his lock, stock and barrel. Because he is a good guy at the end of the day.
Highly recommended.
June 13, 2021
It's BORING and kinda stupid...
October 9, 2023
I've given this an A for narration and a B+ for content at AudioGals, so 4.5 stars rounded up.
Each of the books in Nicky James’ Trials of Fear series features a protagonist living with an unusual phobia. Cravings of the Heart – an angsty, hurt/comfort story featuring an age-gap/brother’s bestie romance – is book six in the series but can be listened to as a standalone, and the narration by Adam Gold is outstanding – I can’t believe I’ve waited this long to listen to him!
When twenty-year-old Arden McMillan has a dizzy spell during the day at college, the paramedic who arrives to check him over and take him to hospital is Ignatius – Iggy – Rojas, the man on whom Arden had a massive crush as a kid. Iggy is also Arden’s oldest brother Phoenix’s best friend, although – as Arden believes – they haven’t seen each other for years. He’s surprised to learn that Iggy and Phoenix are still in touch – just that Iggy doesn’t come to the house any more. That’s odd – Phoenix never mentions Iggy – and it’s only when Arden learns that Iggy is gay that he realises the truth, that his ultra-religious parents don’t approve and that Phoenix has probably hidden the fact that they’re still friends. Finding out Iggy is gay is the best news Arden has had in ages though; he’s as attracted to him as he ever was and decides to find out if there could be anything more between them.
There are plenty of reviews around that will tell you what Arden’s phobia is, but I’m going to keep it vague. (I had a rough idea before I started listening, but I enjoyed working it out along with Iggy.) Arden is keeping a big secret from everyone that is slowly killing him, but his parents are too preoccupied (he’s one of eight kids) and, frankly, too prejudiced to notice or care much. He comes off as a bit of an arsehole to begin with, but the more we get to know him and what he’s dealing with, the easier it is to understand that he’s purposely cultivated this in-your-face, fuck-you attitude as a protective screen. He uses his acerbic tongue to keep the people around him – mostly his parents and Phoenix – at a distance and to pretend he doesn’t give a shit about anything or anyone because he’s terrified of what’s happening to him and doesn’t know what to do about it. His parents are profoundly unsympathetic and made my blood boil. I have no time for religious fanatics, and certainly not ones who refuse medical intervention because they mistakenly believe God will provide, so Arden’s parents disgusted me; that they didn’t kick him out when he came out a year earlier is something in their favour I suppose, although they’re continually on at him to return to the church and pray for forgiveness for being deviant and to be restored to the ‘right’ path.
Iggy is the only person who realises that there is more to what is going on with Arden than what he allows everyone else to believe and see. Iggy is ten years older than Arden and mostly remembers him as Phoenix’s annoying kid brother, but he can’t help being interested in the sweet and funny young man Arden has become. He knows it’s a bad idea to become involved with a McMillan – the family treated him abominably when he came out – yet he’s drawn to Arden and wants to get to know him better. What starts out as friendship soon begins to turn into something else, but as they spend more time together, it becomes impossible for Iggy not to notice that there’s something not right about Arden’s relationship with food. Arden says he’s anorexic – which is what everyone believes – but Iggy doesn’t buy it. He’s a great guy and is one of life’s caretakers; while he very much wants to help Arden, he knows he can’t do that until Arden is ready, so he decides not to push him and to wait for Arden to tell him what’s going on in his own time… until it becomes frighteningly clear that time isn’t something Arden has on his side.
The relationship that develops between Arden and Iggy is sweet and lovely, but the main focus of the story is on Arden’s journey towards acceptance and healing. I loved how caring and supportive Iggy is, how he truly sees Arden and how he refuses to let him face his demons alone, but the romance seems to move fairly quickly and I wasn’t completely convinced by it. It’s not insta-love, it’s more that there’s so much else going on that there didn’t seem enough time for a romance to properly develop. I did like Arden and Iggy as a couple though.
The author presents Arden’s phobia in a sensitive way while also creating a bit of a mystery around it, bringing us along with Iggy as he picks up on and unravels the clues he spots simply through paying proper attention. The secondary cast is fairly small – I’ve already mentioned Arden’s awful parents; the other main character is Phoenix, who is also easy to dislike because he’s so ready to dismiss Arden as just a spoiled attention-seeker. He doesn’t live at home so doesn’t see what’s really going on, and it’s not until Iggy makes clear just how serious Arden’s situation is that he begins to realise he might have misjudged his brother. It’s not an overnight transformation, but he does redeem himself and convinced me that he’d changed his tune by the end. Less convincing is the last minute change of heart by Arden’s parents – I just couldn’t believe that people who were so utterly blinkered and entrenched in their world-view would change so radically and so quickly.
The performance by Adam Gold is expressive and perfectly judged, packing a real emotional punch when called for as well as delivering warmth and humour in the lighter and more romantic moments. I can’t believe I haven’t listened to him before, but you can be certain I’ll be looking for more of his work; he’s recorded all the books in this series and several others by Nicky James, so I’ll be checking those out stat. Mr. Gold has a gorgeous voice – deep and resonant – and his vocal acting is up there with the very best of them. His portrayal of the two leads absolutely nails their personalities; Iggy’s warm-toned, measured delivery has a hint of steel beneath it and perfectly depicts this caring, patient and determined man, while Arden’s voice is higher-pitched with an brittle edginess that reveals just how scared he is, and his most cutting snark is delivered with a palpable lip-curl. It’s a terrific portrayal that skilfully conveys Arden’s deep-rooted fear that his life is spinning out of control. The characterisation and differentiation are excellent throughout; Phoenix’s disdain and anger come through extremely strongly in the early stages of the story, and Arden’s parents sound so condescending and self-righteous that I wanted to scream and hit something whenever they opened their mouths!
Arden’s story is heart-breaking and his is a complex and difficult journey, but I came away from the book satisfied in the knowledge that he was well on the road to recovery and getting the support he needed. Cravings of the Heart may not be a book for everyone, but it certainly satisfied my craving for an intensely emotional tale I could become completely invested in, and Adam Gold’s superb performance takes it to a whole new level. If – like me – you’re here for the angst, you won’t want to miss it.
This review originally appeared at AudioGals.
Each of the books in Nicky James’ Trials of Fear series features a protagonist living with an unusual phobia. Cravings of the Heart – an angsty, hurt/comfort story featuring an age-gap/brother’s bestie romance – is book six in the series but can be listened to as a standalone, and the narration by Adam Gold is outstanding – I can’t believe I’ve waited this long to listen to him!
When twenty-year-old Arden McMillan has a dizzy spell during the day at college, the paramedic who arrives to check him over and take him to hospital is Ignatius – Iggy – Rojas, the man on whom Arden had a massive crush as a kid. Iggy is also Arden’s oldest brother Phoenix’s best friend, although – as Arden believes – they haven’t seen each other for years. He’s surprised to learn that Iggy and Phoenix are still in touch – just that Iggy doesn’t come to the house any more. That’s odd – Phoenix never mentions Iggy – and it’s only when Arden learns that Iggy is gay that he realises the truth, that his ultra-religious parents don’t approve and that Phoenix has probably hidden the fact that they’re still friends. Finding out Iggy is gay is the best news Arden has had in ages though; he’s as attracted to him as he ever was and decides to find out if there could be anything more between them.
There are plenty of reviews around that will tell you what Arden’s phobia is, but I’m going to keep it vague. (I had a rough idea before I started listening, but I enjoyed working it out along with Iggy.) Arden is keeping a big secret from everyone that is slowly killing him, but his parents are too preoccupied (he’s one of eight kids) and, frankly, too prejudiced to notice or care much. He comes off as a bit of an arsehole to begin with, but the more we get to know him and what he’s dealing with, the easier it is to understand that he’s purposely cultivated this in-your-face, fuck-you attitude as a protective screen. He uses his acerbic tongue to keep the people around him – mostly his parents and Phoenix – at a distance and to pretend he doesn’t give a shit about anything or anyone because he’s terrified of what’s happening to him and doesn’t know what to do about it. His parents are profoundly unsympathetic and made my blood boil. I have no time for religious fanatics, and certainly not ones who refuse medical intervention because they mistakenly believe God will provide, so Arden’s parents disgusted me; that they didn’t kick him out when he came out a year earlier is something in their favour I suppose, although they’re continually on at him to return to the church and pray for forgiveness for being deviant and to be restored to the ‘right’ path.
Iggy is the only person who realises that there is more to what is going on with Arden than what he allows everyone else to believe and see. Iggy is ten years older than Arden and mostly remembers him as Phoenix’s annoying kid brother, but he can’t help being interested in the sweet and funny young man Arden has become. He knows it’s a bad idea to become involved with a McMillan – the family treated him abominably when he came out – yet he’s drawn to Arden and wants to get to know him better. What starts out as friendship soon begins to turn into something else, but as they spend more time together, it becomes impossible for Iggy not to notice that there’s something not right about Arden’s relationship with food. Arden says he’s anorexic – which is what everyone believes – but Iggy doesn’t buy it. He’s a great guy and is one of life’s caretakers; while he very much wants to help Arden, he knows he can’t do that until Arden is ready, so he decides not to push him and to wait for Arden to tell him what’s going on in his own time… until it becomes frighteningly clear that time isn’t something Arden has on his side.
The relationship that develops between Arden and Iggy is sweet and lovely, but the main focus of the story is on Arden’s journey towards acceptance and healing. I loved how caring and supportive Iggy is, how he truly sees Arden and how he refuses to let him face his demons alone, but the romance seems to move fairly quickly and I wasn’t completely convinced by it. It’s not insta-love, it’s more that there’s so much else going on that there didn’t seem enough time for a romance to properly develop. I did like Arden and Iggy as a couple though.
The author presents Arden’s phobia in a sensitive way while also creating a bit of a mystery around it, bringing us along with Iggy as he picks up on and unravels the clues he spots simply through paying proper attention. The secondary cast is fairly small – I’ve already mentioned Arden’s awful parents; the other main character is Phoenix, who is also easy to dislike because he’s so ready to dismiss Arden as just a spoiled attention-seeker. He doesn’t live at home so doesn’t see what’s really going on, and it’s not until Iggy makes clear just how serious Arden’s situation is that he begins to realise he might have misjudged his brother. It’s not an overnight transformation, but he does redeem himself and convinced me that he’d changed his tune by the end. Less convincing is the last minute change of heart by Arden’s parents – I just couldn’t believe that people who were so utterly blinkered and entrenched in their world-view would change so radically and so quickly.
The performance by Adam Gold is expressive and perfectly judged, packing a real emotional punch when called for as well as delivering warmth and humour in the lighter and more romantic moments. I can’t believe I haven’t listened to him before, but you can be certain I’ll be looking for more of his work; he’s recorded all the books in this series and several others by Nicky James, so I’ll be checking those out stat. Mr. Gold has a gorgeous voice – deep and resonant – and his vocal acting is up there with the very best of them. His portrayal of the two leads absolutely nails their personalities; Iggy’s warm-toned, measured delivery has a hint of steel beneath it and perfectly depicts this caring, patient and determined man, while Arden’s voice is higher-pitched with an brittle edginess that reveals just how scared he is, and his most cutting snark is delivered with a palpable lip-curl. It’s a terrific portrayal that skilfully conveys Arden’s deep-rooted fear that his life is spinning out of control. The characterisation and differentiation are excellent throughout; Phoenix’s disdain and anger come through extremely strongly in the early stages of the story, and Arden’s parents sound so condescending and self-righteous that I wanted to scream and hit something whenever they opened their mouths!
Arden’s story is heart-breaking and his is a complex and difficult journey, but I came away from the book satisfied in the knowledge that he was well on the road to recovery and getting the support he needed. Cravings of the Heart may not be a book for everyone, but it certainly satisfied my craving for an intensely emotional tale I could become completely invested in, and Adam Gold’s superb performance takes it to a whole new level. If – like me – you’re here for the angst, you won’t want to miss it.
This review originally appeared at AudioGals.
November 7, 2022
4.5 stars for the story
5 stars for Adam Gold's narration.
Loved this.
Even though it took me a bit to warm up to Arden, Iggy just shone through the pages.
He was such a great character, so supportive and understanding. He was such a pillar of strength for Arden.
Arden's phobia was so sad... not like the usual eating disorders. He was afraid to eat... not because of weight concerns, but because he was afraid food would kill him.
Loved everything about this book. Loved how Phoenix stepped up after being an epic douchebag.
I was glad how Nicky also redeemed Arden's parents, to a degree.
5 stars for Adam Gold's narration.
Loved this.
Even though it took me a bit to warm up to Arden, Iggy just shone through the pages.
He was such a great character, so supportive and understanding. He was such a pillar of strength for Arden.
Arden's phobia was so sad... not like the usual eating disorders. He was afraid to eat... not because of weight concerns, but because he was afraid food would kill him.
Loved everything about this book. Loved how Phoenix stepped up after being an epic douchebag.
I was glad how Nicky also redeemed Arden's parents, to a degree.
February 21, 2021
4.5 stars
Iggy and Arden were adorable and I loved their connections and support for each other!
Ardens phobia was interesting having a fear of food but knowing you need it would be a very hard struggle to go through. And Iggy being an EMT was very helpful in this scenario.
I really enjoyed this book and I can’t wait to read the finale!
Iggy and Arden were adorable and I loved their connections and support for each other!
Ardens phobia was interesting having a fear of food but knowing you need it would be a very hard struggle to go through. And Iggy being an EMT was very helpful in this scenario.
I really enjoyed this book and I can’t wait to read the finale!
August 24, 2025
4.4⭐
This book was such an emotional and captivating journey. It took me a little while to warm up to Arden, but once I did, I couldn’t put the story down. And honestly, Iggy completely stole the show for me.what an amazing character! He was supportive, patient, and so understanding throughout the book. Truly a rock for Arden when he needed it the most.
Arden’s phobia broke my heart. It wasn’t your typical portrayal of an eating disorder. He wasn’t avoiding food because of weight or body image issues, he was genuinely terrified that eating could kill him. That level of fear and anxiety was so raw and unique, and it added such depth to his character and the story overall.
I loved how well this book handled such sensitive topics while also delivering such heartfelt moments. The dynamic between Arden and Iggy was beautiful and deeply moving. And Phoenix? I didn’t expect to like him after how he started out, but I was pleasantly surprised by his growth and the way he stepped up later in the story.
The only thing that frustrated me was Arden’s parents. I didn’t like how dismissive and unsupportive they were toward his phobia. They didn’t seem to understand the depth of his fear or the impact it had on his life, and that lack of empathy really bothered me. It made me so protective of Arden and even more appreciative of the people who truly cared for him.
Overall, this was an emotional, beautifully written book with amazing character development and a storyline that lingers long after you finish. Highly recommended if you enjoy stories that deal with real struggles, healing, and finding strength through love and support.🫶🤍
This book was such an emotional and captivating journey. It took me a little while to warm up to Arden, but once I did, I couldn’t put the story down. And honestly, Iggy completely stole the show for me.what an amazing character! He was supportive, patient, and so understanding throughout the book. Truly a rock for Arden when he needed it the most.
Arden’s phobia broke my heart. It wasn’t your typical portrayal of an eating disorder. He wasn’t avoiding food because of weight or body image issues, he was genuinely terrified that eating could kill him. That level of fear and anxiety was so raw and unique, and it added such depth to his character and the story overall.
I loved how well this book handled such sensitive topics while also delivering such heartfelt moments. The dynamic between Arden and Iggy was beautiful and deeply moving. And Phoenix? I didn’t expect to like him after how he started out, but I was pleasantly surprised by his growth and the way he stepped up later in the story.
The only thing that frustrated me was Arden’s parents. I didn’t like how dismissive and unsupportive they were toward his phobia. They didn’t seem to understand the depth of his fear or the impact it had on his life, and that lack of empathy really bothered me. It made me so protective of Arden and even more appreciative of the people who truly cared for him.
Overall, this was an emotional, beautifully written book with amazing character development and a storyline that lingers long after you finish. Highly recommended if you enjoy stories that deal with real struggles, healing, and finding strength through love and support.🫶🤍
April 27, 2019
This series just gets better and better!!!
Cravings of the Heart is the 6th book written for the Trials of Fear series and I’m happy to learn that it’s not the last.
As with all of Nicky James’s books, her attention to detail is outstanding, her character development is on point and her commitment to educating her readers about Mental Health is commendable.
For years, Arden McMillan suffered in silence with an eating disorder – more on point, from Cibophobia, a fear of food. This has affected his life, but his family seem to ignore or just turn a blind eye.
Iggy Rojas, ousted family friend, sees Arden after 10 years and immediately knows that something is not right.
I absolutely love Iggy. His patience and love for Arden, his commitment to help him admit his problem and seek out help is just beautiful.
Arden’s strength in the face of bullying and denial from his family is heartbreaking.
Cravings of the Heart can be read as a standalone, although we do meet previous characters from the series… but why not read the entire series!!!
IT’S AMAZING!!
Mrs James hints at an event in the next book that will have readers guessing and wanting to read the finale (note that this is not a cliffhanger, but more a whetting your appetite ending).
I can’t wait to read the next book!!!!
Thank you for another 5-star read Mrs James!!!
💜💜💜💜💜
Cravings of the Heart is the 6th book written for the Trials of Fear series and I’m happy to learn that it’s not the last.
As with all of Nicky James’s books, her attention to detail is outstanding, her character development is on point and her commitment to educating her readers about Mental Health is commendable.
For years, Arden McMillan suffered in silence with an eating disorder – more on point, from Cibophobia, a fear of food. This has affected his life, but his family seem to ignore or just turn a blind eye.
Iggy Rojas, ousted family friend, sees Arden after 10 years and immediately knows that something is not right.
I absolutely love Iggy. His patience and love for Arden, his commitment to help him admit his problem and seek out help is just beautiful.
Arden’s strength in the face of bullying and denial from his family is heartbreaking.
Cravings of the Heart can be read as a standalone, although we do meet previous characters from the series… but why not read the entire series!!!
IT’S AMAZING!!
Mrs James hints at an event in the next book that will have readers guessing and wanting to read the finale (note that this is not a cliffhanger, but more a whetting your appetite ending).
I can’t wait to read the next book!!!!
Thank you for another 5-star read Mrs James!!!
💜💜💜💜💜
December 29, 2021
[3.5] now the story has its flaws, but considering how much the previous book in the series (#4) flopped for me and my curiosity to explore the
fear
of food triggered by a traumatic event, i'm rounding up!
September 25, 2021
What an emotional and painful journey. Wasn’t sure what to expect in this story but I couldn’t put it down. Extremely compassionate and thoughtful
November 12, 2023
5 Stars ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐🎧
I am glad I waited sometime before jumping into this book because it was heavy. But it was incredible, and the love story grabs your heart and won't let go.
The fact that Arden is struggling so much and no one seems to notice, they just make assumptions about it and don't really take the time to ask questions. That really bothered me, his brother. I wanted to kick his butt, honestly; jealous much?
Iggy, oh Iggy, he noticed and asked questions without being in your face, and I love that he wanted Arden for just who he was. Sure, he wanted to help, but he wanted to help him so he wouldn't be hurting anymore, not because Arden needed to change.
I will say I wasn't sure how the family was going to work in this book. I was ready to write them off completely. I am glad I didn't. I will not elaborate because it needs to be experienced.
LOVED the narration and that ending with the sister and all the tears!
I am glad I waited sometime before jumping into this book because it was heavy. But it was incredible, and the love story grabs your heart and won't let go.
The fact that Arden is struggling so much and no one seems to notice, they just make assumptions about it and don't really take the time to ask questions. That really bothered me, his brother. I wanted to kick his butt, honestly; jealous much?
Iggy, oh Iggy, he noticed and asked questions without being in your face, and I love that he wanted Arden for just who he was. Sure, he wanted to help, but he wanted to help him so he wouldn't be hurting anymore, not because Arden needed to change.
I will say I wasn't sure how the family was going to work in this book. I was ready to write them off completely. I am glad I didn't. I will not elaborate because it needs to be experienced.
LOVED the narration and that ending with the sister and all the tears!
May 31, 2025
This book was absolutely amazing. I’ve read another book in this series as well and love how the author focuses so much on the phobia. It’s such an interesting take on a romance having the two characters working through it together. This one was a phobia I had never heard of before and it was super interesting finding out why he has the phobia and what it meant for him.
I loved both Arden and Iggy so much. Arden had so much on his shoulders and I know he was keeping everything a secret as much as he could but I hated how much his family didn’t see what was happening to him (and can I say home much I disliked Phoenix for most of this book, he redeemed himself thankfully but wanted to shake him soooo many times). So glad Arden had Iggy to come along and help him!
This was an angsty read and I honestly didn’t know how it was going to be a HEA until quite far in the book. I really enjoyed the journey and highly recommend this story. I listened to the audio and the narrator did a great job! I couldn’t put this book down and ended up finishing this book in one day!
I loved both Arden and Iggy so much. Arden had so much on his shoulders and I know he was keeping everything a secret as much as he could but I hated how much his family didn’t see what was happening to him (and can I say home much I disliked Phoenix for most of this book, he redeemed himself thankfully but wanted to shake him soooo many times). So glad Arden had Iggy to come along and help him!
This was an angsty read and I honestly didn’t know how it was going to be a HEA until quite far in the book. I really enjoyed the journey and highly recommend this story. I listened to the audio and the narrator did a great job! I couldn’t put this book down and ended up finishing this book in one day!
June 13, 2022
I looooooove this story and on audio with Adam's voice, just *eeeeeeeek*. Perfection. I love how he gives life to this characters with his voice, full with emotions. Nicky created an amazing world with this series, different love stories around different phobias, and then comes an awesome narrator and brings them to life, it's just perfect.
Teenage crush turning into love, brother's best friend, add an eating disorder ermm I mean phobia, fear of eating. Love it. And the characters are just the best. Loved reading this and now listening to it was great too.
Teenage crush turning into love, brother's best friend, add an eating disorder ermm I mean phobia, fear of eating. Love it. And the characters are just the best. Loved reading this and now listening to it was great too.
April 26, 2019
The McMillan and Rojas families had a silent feud. Their sons were friends but had to keep it quiet because of their parents.
Ten years later, Arden McMillan and Iggy Rojas should of been off limits to each other. But they can’t seem to keep their lips to themselves. Iggy had bad relationships that didn’t work out. Arden had serious issues with food that colored and controlled his whole life. On paper they just didn’t work. In real life they just couldn’t stay out of each other’s orbit. When Arden’s phobia seriously endangered his health, Iggy was there by his side to help pull him through and give him the courage to change his life.
Iggy and Arden were wonderful characters. Iggy was such a caring and giving man. Arden, even though his issues made him seem weak, was made of steel. This author creates the most interesting stories. Imbuing the characters with what seems to be insurmountable problems and helping them find their way through with the strength of their love. I liked this addition to the series.
I received an arc of this book.
Ten years later, Arden McMillan and Iggy Rojas should of been off limits to each other. But they can’t seem to keep their lips to themselves. Iggy had bad relationships that didn’t work out. Arden had serious issues with food that colored and controlled his whole life. On paper they just didn’t work. In real life they just couldn’t stay out of each other’s orbit. When Arden’s phobia seriously endangered his health, Iggy was there by his side to help pull him through and give him the courage to change his life.
Iggy and Arden were wonderful characters. Iggy was such a caring and giving man. Arden, even though his issues made him seem weak, was made of steel. This author creates the most interesting stories. Imbuing the characters with what seems to be insurmountable problems and helping them find their way through with the strength of their love. I liked this addition to the series.
I received an arc of this book.
September 28, 2022
Reread - still might be one of my favorites of the series #FEELS
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"I had no doubt, if Arden asked, I'd follow him to the ends of the earth."
Cravings of the Heart is another beautifully emotional story by author Nicky James. This one tackles cibophobia , the fear of food, and I think this might be my favorite Trials of Fear book. I loved the story and characters so much. Arden's fears and the cause of his phobia gutted me, it was so sad and made me cry. Iggy was so patient and loving and was the perfect match for Arden giving him the support he needed to face his problems. Both Iggy and Arden stole my heart and their connection was everything. Whenever Iggy called him 'mi corazon' my heart burst.
We came together with the sure connection of two magnets seeking their opposite pole. No hesitation. Solid. Perfect. Complete. Like it was ment to be."
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"I had no doubt, if Arden asked, I'd follow him to the ends of the earth."
Cravings of the Heart is another beautifully emotional story by author Nicky James. This one tackles cibophobia , the fear of food, and I think this might be my favorite Trials of Fear book. I loved the story and characters so much. Arden's fears and the cause of his phobia gutted me, it was so sad and made me cry. Iggy was so patient and loving and was the perfect match for Arden giving him the support he needed to face his problems. Both Iggy and Arden stole my heart and their connection was everything. Whenever Iggy called him 'mi corazon' my heart burst.
We came together with the sure connection of two magnets seeking their opposite pole. No hesitation. Solid. Perfect. Complete. Like it was ment to be."
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