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229 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2009
"On this occasion, he managed to shit and on inspection saw that the shit was well-formed, well-covered and cleanly off him. Buoyed by his success, he wiped his bottom several times with the toilet paper flushing the toilet after each pass and then without getting off the toilet wet a washcloth and passed the wet cloth between his legs. It burned his skin but after a couple of attempts the cloth emerged unsoiled and he returned it to the sink under the running water."After this, it was all I could do to continue... 10 more pages.




When you live with a woman for a long time, after a while you make a lot of excuses for what you don't feel. But unless you're a fool you don't believe the woman is at fault. It's that the world changes beneath your feet. Things go slow at first and the changes are so small that it's almost imperceptible and you pay it no mind. And then later, years later, the change seems huge, and it seems to have occurred overnight. Suddenly you aren't the person you were. And then where once you thought not wanting what you used to want was punishment, suddenly you think it may be a blessing, and things stand still.These ponderings can serve as a summary reflection on the overall mood of the book. They provide a feeling of acceptance and resolution for the confusion contained in the preceding story.
You watch the moon reflected on the swarming Gulf water, and you think that's enough, that's all I want. I just want to sit on this broken down deck on this night in this cool weather with this breeze blowing over me and watch this moon lift into the sky, remarkably oval, remarkably pearly, remarkably aloft. And you want to think this in just these words, and you know the words aren't right. They aren't even close, and that doesn't matter. The deal is that it's just the moon in the sky reflected on the Gulf, the water hissing and receding. And you're in the middle of it, and you're just a small part, an unimportant part, but a part nonetheless. Your job is to be something so the moon can hit something when it shines at the earth. You are something to hit. And that's the way it is for the rest of the world too. What people say and what they think, who they are, what they think about you, what they ask of you. What you want, what you give them does not matter. It's that way for everything. ... .... ..... You're something to hit, you're a receiver, you're an antenna.