Ouch.
If I’m being honest, this book was physically painful for me to read.
First of all it makes no sense. It’s listed as a mystery yet it has...no...mystery? The only part that kinda sorta maaaybe be classified as a mystery was with Crystal’s shoes. Spoiler Alert, it’s Kim. Wow. Surprised. Truly I am shocked by this startling turn of events. Wooow.
Second of all, the dialogue is a bit off??? I mean I understand that the characters are young and dumb but it’s weird. It’s kinda like a teenager, who is out of the loop with pretty much everything, wrote a novel like an old lady who is very aware of today’s teens, as two 13/14 year old girls. Confused? Yeah that’s how I felt with the whole book.
Then we have the characters. Gosh the characters I don’t even know where to start. Oh wait, yes I do, they’re all awful. The twins got on my nerves most. They’re the most spoiled, self-centered, selfish, stupid twins I’ve ever read about. They’re so similar, I had to flip back to the first couple pages of the chapter to check who they are MANY TIMES. Okay yeah their names are similar, and sure one doesn’t like makeup and dresses and one does but seriously man? I really didn’t understand why they were so basic. They’re like every other female heroine. Petite, skinny, and of course attractive. Gosh I just want one book that has a character that’s not perfect, and they’re okay with that. And they’re bratty. For example, when the girly twin was an idiot and messed up her face, she asked her mom to get some face cream. Her mom, being a nice person, went out of her way to buy some. When the twin gets it, you won’t believe it, she complains. To put it simply, she said “MA tHIs iS dIgUsTiNg” I wanted to laugh and cry at this part. The mom was like “DONT SaY tHat” and the twin was like “oK” but then the mom was totally over it. At one point in the story the twin hit her head. Then she “stalked” to her parents when they were arguing and she screamed at them? I quote “Well you were so absorbed in the fight, you didn’t hear me yell! I practically got knocked out!” (123)
Who says that?
Honestly they all seemed really self absorbed.
Fourth of all (does anyone say that anymore?) the plot made no sense. I swear, if I read this novel upside down it would make more sense then right side up. It focused on the teenage drama, rather then the non-existent mystery.
Then there were the parts that were so dumb it’s laughable. My favorite parts of the story is when the teens text each other. Its so obvious that the author has no idea how texting slangs work. For example
“I QUIT. HAPPY?”
“NO. CL M”
.....
“CM 2BAD2BT”
.....
“?4U”
“411”
“LEMENO WEN”
“PCKING 2MORRO
.....
“U NO WHO REALLY WAS”
“UR DRESS WAS”
..............
Honestly it was so funny to me. It looks like the author just took some syllables out and was like “YES I AM THE MODERN DAY TEEN”
TL;DR: I just hated this book so badly. It was so bad and had no plot.
Quick Summary: On faints here, another fainting here OOH TEENAGE DRAMA SLIDE WHEEEE