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Friend-ish: Reclaiming Real Friendship in a Culture of Confusion
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Friend-ish: Reclaiming Real Friendship in a Culture of Confusion

4.66  ·  Rating details ·  126 ratings  ·  70 reviews
Bible teacher Kelly Needham debunks our world's constricted, small view of friendship and casts a richer, more life-giving, biblical vision for friendship as God meant it to be.

As the family unit grows more unstable and the average age of marriage increases, a shift is taking place in our culture: for many people, friends now play the role of family. And just as with
Paperback, 224 pages
Published August 27th 2019 by Thomas Nelson
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Average rating 4.66  · 
Rating details
 ·  126 ratings  ·  70 reviews

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Elizabeth Cantrell
Aug 13, 2019 rated it it was amazing
I’ve been following Kelly’s blog for years after seeing a post on Facebook linking to a blog post she wrote about friendships. I recognized her name because I’d been a fan of her husband, Jimmy Needham’s music since college. I don’t even remember what her post was specifically about, but I remember reading it and saying “wow.” It was a lot of what I’d needed to hear for a while and also things I had strong feelings about, but had never seen someone else put into words in such a honest way. I was ...more
Lauren Douglas
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Friendish was a good read on Biblical friendship. Kelly Needham addresses issues that are left out and missing from other Christian books on the same topic. She shares personal stories but also consistently points back to the Bible.
I would definitely recommend this book and plan to use points from it in the future for my own friendships and when teaching my children about the proper view of friendship.
Sarah Mullins
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Friendish- by Kelly Needham is a fabulous book on Godly Friendships. It has opened my eyes to so many ways I have misunderstood/misused God's blessing of friendship. It has also been so helpful explaining true friendship to my young children. My oldest child is currently navigating his first month in Kindergarden and all the social interactions that are involved. What I love most about this book is that it isn't just Kelly's opinion on friendship with one or two scriptures as support. Instead sh ...more
A Van
Aug 13, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Well-written, convicting, and biblically-based exploration of friendship...what it is, what it should be, and how it must be sourced in a personal relationship with our true Friend, Christ Jesus! Whether you have lots of friends or very few, are blessed with deep and close relationships or struggle to connect well with others, Kelly is a humble and competent guide to help you navigate the world of interpersonal relationships by turning first to God's Word. Read this prayerfully and be encouraged ...more
Aug 24, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This book has come at the perfect time in my life, as I work through how to navigate my friendships and seek to honor God in my friendships. Kelly did a wonderful job exploring problems in friendships, how to seek out God as our most highly prioritized and accessed friend, and how to find healthy friendship/be a healthy friend who points her friends to Jesus always. I highly recommend!
Bailey Edrington
Holy moly this book!!! This book is easily in one of my top three favorite gospel-centered resources! I am so thankful this book exists! It has sharpened me, discipled me in the area of friendship, and encouraged me in my faith. I can’t stop talking about it!
Sep 26, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This book really challenged me.
Aug 26, 2019 rated it it was amazing
So much more than expected!

“Following Jesus transforms more than simply how we do friendship; it transforms why we do it.” (from the book)

If you think you’re a pretty good friend and have surrounded yourself with the same, or if you have no friends and think people don’t like you, you should read this book. I began reading Friendish expecting that, as a long-time single who greatly values friendships, I would likely be nodding my head a lot in agreement. I wasn’t wrong, b
Aug 25, 2019 rated it liked it
What Kelly Needham has done in friendish is openly, honestly, and boldly shared about a topic that the world and myself desperately needs to read, learn more regarding, and talk about; which is idolatry in friendship.

Knowing the topic and theme of this book, I was therefore incredibly excited to read through a copy of it. The overall topic and Kelly Needham’s willingness to publicize it deserves 5 stars!

However, I found the book to be more suited to a devotional study or bible-study type group
Sep 27, 2019 rated it it was ok
I read this book for a book club and I don’t like to speak ill of anyone trying to do God’s work but the author seemed so immature to me. I didn’t feel like she had the wisdom to deliver this book effectively, she gives examples from when she was in middle school. I think she needed to wait another ten years to write a book like this when she’d been though more seasons in her life or target preteens or teenagers for her audience.
Amy Weintraub
Aug 14, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Panda Incognito
One of my Facebook friends recently shared an article by this author that shared some of the main points and content from this book. As soon as I got to the end, I preordered this on Amazon, because I wanted it immediately, and there was no way I was going to wait six months to inter-library loan this. I'm so glad that I did, and it was well worth the money, especially since I can now loan it out to people.

Friendship is one of the most important things in my life, and always has been
Lauren DuPrez
Aug 29, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Friendish is the debut book from Bible teacher and author Kelly Needham. The book's title is derived from the idea that as Christians, we need to cultivate friendships that are genuine. Kelly begins the book with the example of when she was visiting some friends and they went out to eat at a Mexican restaurant. Kelly was really looking forward to enjoying Mexican food but became disappointed as her friends explained that the restaurant served "Mexican-ish" food rather than authentic Mexican food ...more
Monet Carpenter
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
"Our first step to cultivating healthy friendships with people is cultivating a friendship with God... without [ it ], we have no hope of rightly befriending one another.”

Kelly Needham jumps right in to reordering everything we ever thought, consciously or not, we knew about healthy friendships. Contrary to today’s culture, Needham expresses the importance of properly posturing God as head over all relationships, thus fulfilling those desires of belonging, comfort, and need, that we
Aug 24, 2019 rated it it was amazing
I first discovered Kelly and her book in an episode of the Journeywomen Podcast. I loved what she said about unhealthy friendships, and I knew that I would have to buy her book when it finally came out. I began following Kelly on Instagram, and when I saw that she opened an application for her book launch team, I had to join! What’s better than getting a free book to read and review that addresses one of your biggest struggles?

Kelly begins her book by stating that friendship is very
Aug 26, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Simply put, I both enjoyed this book and benefited from it in some deep and needed ways. Whether you think you're "good at friendship" or not, you still probably need to read this book. Here's a quick overview of the structure of the book that might help you see why:

-- Kelly expresses at the beginning the NEED we all have for genuine, healthy friendship - the real thing.
-- 3 chapters outline different counterfeits we can stray to, thinking we have "good" friendships (and they vary).
-- 2
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
I don't think I could overstate how much I loved this book. It's now on my list of "Books every Christian should read." I think it's that necessary. It's written to young people and adults, men and women. This is exactly the kind of Christian Living book I love: pick a subject and just explore what the Bible says about it. It's saturated with Scripture and had a high view of ecclesiology. This needs to be in your library.
TBH, I've always felt like I was a sucky friend. Turns out I w
Lisa Laws
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Friendish is a book I wish were written years ago when I was deep into struggles with emotional dependency and anxiety in my friendships. How easy it is for us to turn friends into idols and selfishly pursue friendships to fill our needs, rather than seek Jesus above all else.

In this book, Kelly speaks truth and points us to the One who satisfies our souls so we can rightly pursue friendships for their God-intended purpose: to pursue God’s Kingdom and encourage one another towards knowing God a
Baylie Hartley
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
I do not know of another resource like this for biblical friendship. It isn't just about Christians who are friends with other Christians. The heart of God is clear in this gospel-centered approach to friendship: it is about what kind of friend I am to others, to all. Kelly reveals truth in a no-fluff kind of way that, if you'll receive it, can pull you in to the Father's heart. My relationship with God is growing and my ideology of how friendship with others should look has changed. I don't rea ...more
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Kelly Needham’s book speaks straight to the root of a problem I hardly realized was problematic for me and many of my peers. Her timely word on the importance of selfless, “others-focused” friendships is far more (but certainly not less) than a self-help book for codependents seeking freedom from relationship addiction. It also isn’t a “how to make friends” manual either, so both of my initial presuppositions about the book were quickly debunked. Kelly, in the book, writes poignantly in a way th ...more
Danielle Richardson
Aug 28, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Julie Fuller
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Not good to be Alone
The last year I have been on a journey of trying to understand what a friend truly means to me. I don’t know about you, but I am always looking to grow, learn, and become a better disciple of Jesus. This book has led me to view friendship in a different light which will only help me love others better than I do now.
Everyone has different definitions of friendship. Friendish, discusses how the Lord views friendship and how to have a friendship that point to Jesus and is
Aug 26, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This book is a blessing for the heart & soul. It is biblical, well-written and easy to read... but this does not mean that it will not have you reflect! In this time & age where friendship is used to fill the hole in our heart, this book is great at pointing us back to the source of our joy: Jesus.
I am blessed with good friends but I had not really stopped to wonder if my friendships were healthy and if I am a good friend. Friendish made me realize that I do have some unhealthy pat
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Friend-ish is a must needed resource on biblical friendships. She points to cultivating our friendship with God first above all, which will allow all our other friendships to honor God and bless the people around us. In a world that is shifting the definition of friendship, and especially same-sex friendships, Needham reminds us what friendships are really meant for--to serve one another and further the kingdom of God. She includes research, interviews, and anecdotal examples to help us understa ...more
Rachel Lundy
Aug 29, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2019, friendship
Friendish is a timely and much-needed look at friendship from a biblical perspective. Kelly Needham has written a book filled with wisdom and truth. She takes the reader straight to Scripture to find guidance for the way we do friendship.

Kelly warns of specific dangers to avoid in friendship, and she gives a heartfelt call to true, genuine friendship. She helps the reader to see that the ultimate purpose of friendship is to glorify Christ.

With so many bad examples of friendship in t
Oct 11, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: ng-gitm, kindle-ihi, 2019
This is the first book I read by Kelly Needham (is it her first?) and Im ashamed to say that sometimes kind of skeptical with new authors... but this one was so good! I think she did a great job. I like the order in the topics, no bluff, very actual examples, very useful ideas, practical, down to earth. Im so happy I got this book. I was convicted of several things and praying the Lord to change my heart... I think this book would be great to discuss with friends about friendship and how our rel ...more
Meagan Bender
Aug 23, 2019 rated it it was amazing
A great book for people of all ages and walks of life. It is not just a conceptual book about the importance of friendship, or a guide to self-improvement. It gives practical, applicable wisdom for navigating friendships. I love the entire set-up of the book. There are several chapter devoted to the marks of counterfeit friendships, and how to identify them. It works on deconstructing our current framework. Then once our framework is razed, the foundation is laid. Kelly emphasizes that before we ...more
Leah Ford
Aug 27, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Friend-ish is a wonderful book with a special reminder that we are to ultimately look to God for our satisfaction. He is the ultimate friend we desire. Secondary to that, we do need our friendships and relationships. The Lord made us to fellowship together to glorify his name collectively. So this books provides a balanced look at what seems like a paradoxical. This book screams grace and truth wrapped up in a beautiful bow. There are several convicting and insightful moments throughout. I recom ...more
Meghan Gossett
Sep 13, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This is a book I needed so badly! I'll be honest when I started reading Friend-ish I thought it would be another book about how I needed Christian friends in my life and how I could find those friends. Did you notice all the "I's" in that last sentence? My first revelation while reading this was what a selfish friend I am! That was huge for me to figure out and I have since started making many changes in how I approach friendships. And I am already seeing results from those changes, for the bett ...more
Stephanie Bowman
Aug 26, 2019 rated it it was amazing
So many positive comments I could make about Friendish, but the most important is Kelly's continual focus back to Scripture and having a foundational relationship with Christ. This book challenges me to rethink the framework of friendship and ultimately rely on God first. Kelly's voice is relateable, empathetic, and consistently filled with solid Biblical teaching. She shares her own experiences and heart on this topic but doesn't stop there or let you off the hook as a reader. There are many au ...more
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Kelly Needham is married to popular Christian singer and songwriter Jimmy Needham. She first began writing and speaking to his fan base in 2008 as they traveled together and has since garnered a much wider platform. Kelly is a regular contributor for Revive Our Hearts, and her writing has been featured at Desiring God, The Gospel Coalition, The Ethics and Religious Liberties Commission, Eternal Pe ...more