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No Hard Feelings: The Secret Power of Embracing Emotions at Work
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No Hard Feelings: The Secret Power of Embracing Emotions at Work

4.06  ·  Rating details ·  3,614 ratings  ·  430 reviews
The modern workplace can be an emotional minefield, filled with confusing power structures and unwritten rules. We're expected to be authentic but not too authentic. Professional but not stiff. Friendly but not an oversharer.

As organizational consultants and regular people, we know what it's like to experience uncomfortable emotions at work - everything from mild jealousy
Kindle Edition, 304 pages
Published February 5th 2019 by Portfolio
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Average rating 4.06  · 
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 ·  3,614 ratings  ·  430 reviews

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Mar 18, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Not a review - just some notes I would like to keep handy.

"...emotional dynamics affect our motivation, health, communication, decision making, and more. yet most of us ignore these emotions. Why is it that when we think of professionalism, we immediately jump to the idea that we should suppress everything we feel?" [p.4]

Emotional fluency
"the capacity to productively sense emotion and to know how and when to translate what you feel into healthy action." [p.10]

"no one tells us what to do if we're
Apr 13, 2019 rated it liked it
Terrific topic and well-researched, but too much ground to cover in a book this length. It's basically a literature review of the entire field of emotions at work. I'd have gotten more value out of greater depth in a few key sub-topics.

Excerpts I'm stashing for later:

Don’t extend the logic of the workplace into your time off Many people are overly enthusiastic about optimizing free time. Stop falling into the type-A trap of compulsively making your hobbies more work than work. If you love to pla
Jenny (Reading Envy)
I've been reading this book off and on at work, which I think I heard about on the Get Booked podcast. Helpful advice for dealing with emotions of others, using your own emotions as a tool for decision making and more. The first idea I want to apply is "user manuals" where people get to share their perspective of how they think/work. ...more
Jul 29, 2021 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
What I was really hoping from this book was guidance for someone like me: a person who’s very emotionally expressive at work (I find this often goes hand-in-hand with being young and female) and who can struggle with a work culture that’s more repressive/traditional.

I thought Chapter 2: Health and the appendix “Further Resources on Emotions” were great as they came closest to addressing these points. However I was frustrated that a lot of the rest of the book felt more oriented towards managers
Spotted this as a "new release" and thought it would be an interesting read. I had a performance review and training not long ago and so that was still fresh in my mind as I thought this would be a good read and was curious to know what the authors had a say.

The book is a good overview on what emotions we might encounter at work or around work, what might be the cause(s) and how we can manage them in productive ways. Topics cover everything from boredom to lack of interest to anxiety. Factors th
Mar 09, 2019 rated it it was amazing
I really loved this book. It's succinct and doesn't labour every point, but covers some very important points. The old advice of no emotion at work is just unrealistic and this book provides some excellent ways of handling things.

If you want each point covered in depth then I suggest you read the books referenced in the text. For me, this provided a great resource I can return to/reference having read many of those other books already. In the learning stage you maybe want the depth and many exam
Megan Kurtz
Jan 17, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Cannot recommend enough! We are all brainwashed at some point into thinking being an “emotional” person has no place at work or makes you weak, and nothing could be further from the truth. WE ARE HUMAN. Learning how to harness those feelings and use your superpowers for good is a powerful skill. I especially loved the chapters focused on culture and cultivating a diverse and inclusive workplace. Learning how to reframe stressors, how to be selectively vulnerable and *GASP* be less passionate abo ...more
Chance Lee
Nov 03, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: true-story
Excellent resource for workplace communication. Balances hard science with a firm but gentle tone. Includes lots of illustrations to enhance the message and brighten the mood. The book is definitely focused on intra-office communication, centered almost entirely on corporate workspaces at the exclusion of customer-facing enterprises. Many of the strategies inside are YMMV if you work a customer service job.
Jay Wilson
Jan 13, 2020 rated it liked it
Nothing necessarily groundbreaking, but good tips to keep in mind.

I'm new to the workforce, so the concept of how to handle emotions at work was totally new to me. In my previous role as a student, I expressed my emotions however I felt like it, since most of my time was mine. Now that it's not, that mindset has shown itself to be infeasible. This book has some good info in it, for sure, like keeping in mind that people simply have different preferred styles of communication, among other tidbits
Molly Who
Jan 06, 2021 rated it it was amazing
I recently entered into a new job where I had to take on a leadership role - but I am fresh out of grad school and this would be my first time in anything like this position. This book helped me to take a step back and realize where my anxieties were coming from, as well as become more secure in how I talk to staff and communicate with my boss. It's still a learning curve and I'm still trying to find my way but I feel more confident in knowing how to navigate my emotions in the workplace than I ...more
Diana Lupu
Jan 10, 2021 rated it it was amazing
This is the kind of book you need to read no matter if you are a manager, a worker or a CEO. Not only read once but return to it time and time again. Well deserved 5 stars rating. People I know might be getting copies of it.
Laura Laufman
When your manager knows you’re a reader so she gives you a book to read as part of your development plan… 😂

10/10 enjoyed all the little graphics throughout and the formatting of the book made it interesting and accessible.
Cory Welsh
Jan 18, 2022 rated it it was amazing
Great read for anyone who wants to get more out of work, show up better and lead better than ever. Filled with so much practical wisdom, countless true examples etc
Cassidy Sandoval Baker
Oct 07, 2021 rated it it was amazing
“ Leadership is a skill, not a role. “ I enjoyed this and highly recommend it!
Sep 28, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction, career
Nice book to read to try to make the best of your attitude at work. Some tips on how to make the most of your emotions. I especially to apply it to work culture.

Jamie Bowen
Fascinating book, easy to read and full of some top tips for anyone in business. It’s a book I shall always be referring back to.
Courtney Sams
Mar 10, 2021 rated it really liked it
I really enjoyed this book. It’s not an in-depth book of concepts, but it’s great. I’m going to keep in on my desk as a handy reminder to bring my full self to work with tactical ideas of what that looks like.
Natalie Shawver
Jun 24, 2021 rated it really liked it
Personal development books tend to be dry and not my favorite. They are usually riddled with vague statements or "do this and you'll get promoted" type sentiments (that don't really work). So, when I came across No Hard Feelings, I had a feeling (pun intended) that it would be different ... and it was!

Filled with quirky comics and humorous examples, No Hard Feelings focuses on the fact that we're human ... and surprise surprise ... we have emotions! Gasp! Should we cry everyday at work? Probably
sarah semark
Introverts, read this. Extroverts, read this.
Leaders, read this. Managers, read this. Individual contributors, read this.

I think I would have really enjoyed this book even without all the charming (and funny) graphs and illustrations, but they really pushed it over from a four star to five, underlining the value of emotional connection even for otherwise relatively dry subject matter (work).

I was definitely in the "thinks emotions have no place in the workplace" camp until I read this, and it's
Jul 08, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: july, 2019
An excellent resource for exploring ways to be more emotionally intelligent at work.

While Fosslien and Duffy acknowledge the further challenges faced in work environments by people of color, the book could have very easily been five stars if they had deliberately addressed this significant issue and interviewed and quoted more people of color.
Sep 22, 2019 rated it really liked it
I really enjoyed the layout of this, as well as the different perspectives from the two authors. And thinking of my role as a “shit umbrella” is both wildly hilarious and incredibly helpful.
Jun 10, 2020 rated it really liked it
Shelves: self-development
A handy and realistic guidebook in managing your emotions at work with actionable advices and illustrations! Loved how it told the us to never deny our feelings, but embrace them instead.
Nabeel Hassan
Feb 13, 2021 rated it really liked it
It's a very good book to understand yourself and others feeling (emotional status) in any situation, below is the ideas that argued in the book and take a lot of intervention strategy and tactic that can help us and other to thrive in it.

Idea #1: It’s possible to build a healthy emotional culture at work through small, positive actions.

Idea #2: Leaders should display vulnerability, sometimes, and think carefully about how they share.

Idea #3: Being a little less passionate about your work will he
Valentina Palladino
Jan 31, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: favorites
This book is all about managing your emotions in the workplace—and no, that doesn’t mean pretending emotions don’t exist in the workplace. Too often, many of us try to hide our emotions when we’re in a professional setting, and that’s not always the best way to handle the various circumstances we find ourselves in at work. Liz Fosslien and Mollie West Duffy provide strategies for how we can navigate the emotionally charged world that is the workplace, and how we can thrive without bottling up ev ...more
Jonathan Jackson
Let me first say I had to channel my cousin because she devours books in one day even though this took me a week and a half.
This is a elaborately humorous yet brutal take on organizational behavior and emotional intelligence. This book talks about mental exhaustion and how to avoid chronic venting. How a wandering mind is signifies an unhappy mind (a stressful upbringing can lead to a lack of concentration). It had a chapter in there about team members that are jerks, dissenters, and slackers,
This was a very good read. . . .having been one of the many laid-off (after 30 years. . . ) for over a year and a half, my working self took a big hit in the heart in 2020. I put this book on my TBR self when I thought it would teach my HR self, not realizing that ship was going to be long gone by the time I started reading. Now I'm in the same firm, doing a different job (my request), different mode (remote) and entirely different part of the workflow. Bottomline - I listened with different ear ...more
An illustrated guide to embracing emotions while at work in a professional way to feel more authentic and fulfilled. There is focus on the individual (through health, motivation, and decision making), teams, culture, and leadership.

An amazing (and hilarious!) resource on how to understand and make use of emotions in the workplace. There is a TON of information in this book, so I plan on coming back to it (as well as reading some of the other books that were mentioned in the text). This is an abs
Ana Claudia Santos-Cortez
What a delight! I can’t count how many references I made about this book’s content to peers, my direct manager, HR people, my direct reports, and friends. It’s just too good to be left unread.

Illustrations come with a touch of humor and kindness that helps the emotional reader understand they are not alone in feeling that way. As my husband says: we feel inclined to believe we are the protagonists and sole hurt people out there, yet there’s thousands going through the same path at the same time.
Aug 11, 2019 rated it it was amazing
As a female who struggles to manage my emotions at work sometimes, this book made me feel better. It highlights that it’s okay to feel feelings - but gives so much advice and many resources to support and improve emotions in many scenarios, such as working in teams, leadership and decision making. I wish I could give this to every person in my company. It’s that valuable. And, it’s coupled with witty cartoons and great advice. I also liked that Liz and Mollie provide additional resources on race ...more
This was required reading for work. While it did have some useful tips, I found the cutesy style rather annoying. Also, as an autistic person, some of these recommendations just don't work for me. For example, their suggestion that you constantly smile at your coworkers - I have a flat affect at times and that just feels so unnatural to me, I know it won't come across as anything but painfully awkward. ...more
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