- Sweetie, how are you? We haven't talked for -
- That fucking cow. I saw him with her the other day.
- Oh, I'm sorry -
- Well, at least it looks like it's a difficult pregnancy. I hope she's got varicose veins.
- You know, you shouldn't -
- And I hope those little half-cup bras aren't as comfortable as they used to be. I hope they cut into her disgusting swollen tits every time she wears them.
- Sweetie, really -
- I bet she'll be a terrible mother. She has no idea how to deal with children. None whatsoever. And she can't cook either.
- Well, we'll have to -
- She's no good for him, you know. She stresses him out. He always looks so tired. She only thinks about herself.
- Yes, he does rather -
- If he just drops dead one day it'll be her fault. It would serve them both right.
- Sweetie -
- I sometimes wonder what he's put in his will. I think she might get a nasty surprise.
- I -
- Then she'd have to get by on her own. She'd see what it was like. The stupid fucking bitch. Bitch. Aargh!
- Shall I get us another round?
- Thanks. Oh fuck, I'm sorry, I shouldn't talk about myself all the time, I just can't help it. So what are you doing? How's the novel coming along?
- Blocked. Can't decide how to continue.
- Oh, that's awful! I loved the first one. And I'm just going on and on, I know, I hear myself saying these terrible things and I wish I didn't, but -
- Sweetie, don't worry. Let it all out and you'll feel better. I love listening to you.
- You do? Really?
- I do.
- Oh my god, you're always so nice to me, I feel ashamed. You know, really, in my heart of hearts, I know she's not so bad. I'm just so fucking angry with her. And with him.
- Well of course you are.
- You're right. Now I've said all that shit, I feel better. We should meet more often.
- We should!
- Look, I hope you start getting unblocked with your book soon.
- Actually, I just had an idea. I wonder -
- Oh fuck, is it one o'clock already? I'm so sorry, I have to go. We'll talk more about you next time. Sorry. Sorry! Bye.
- Sweetie, it's okay! See you soon. Bye. And you look after yourself.
- Mwah!
- Mwah!