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Formation: A Woman's Memoir of Stepping Out of Line

Ryan Leigh Dostie

4.21 · Rating details · 504 ratings · 97 reviews

Cheryl Strayed's Wild meets Anthony Swofford's Jarhead in this powerful literary memoir of a young Army recruit driven to prove herself in a man's world.
Raised by powerful women in a restrictive, sheltered Christian community in New England, Ryan Dostie never imagined herself on the front lines of a war halfway around the world. But then a conversation with an Army recruit ...more

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Hardcover, 368 pages

Published June 4th 2019 by Grand Central Publishing

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May 05, 2019 Kelley rated it it was amazing

Shelves: forever-shelf

(As a retired Army Senior Noncommisioned Officer and OIF Veteran, I celebrate and honor the warrior who is Ryan. And yes... PTSD is a m----er f----er!)

In her book, "Formation: A Woman’s Memoir of Stepping Out of Line," author Ryan Leigh Dostie narrates her personal experiences as a soldier in combat–at work and at home–engaged in a battle to survive not only war, but the most personal betrayal imaginable, rape by another soldier. This autobiographical recounting of, and accounting for a female s (As a retired Army Senior Noncommisioned Officer and OIF Veteran, I celebrate and honor the warrior who is Ryan. And yes... PTSD is a m----er f----er!)

In her book, "Formation: A Woman’s Memoir of Stepping Out of Line," author Ryan Leigh Dostie narrates her personal experiences as a soldier in combat–at work and at home–engaged in a battle to survive not only war, but the most personal betrayal imaginable, rape by another soldier. This autobiographical recounting of, and accounting for a female soldier’s time in the Army, is a warrior’s story of institutional assimilation, indoctrination, alienation, and transformation.

Humans tell stories, and stories can comprise narratives about our lives, carrying themes over periods of time. Narratives help us make sense of our world, often structuring meaning in ways that reflect a culture. We survive through the sharing of our stories as they not only serve to communicate culture, but also enable us to speak truth to power. Some narratives can withstand the test of time; they are almost unassailable as accepted truths (i.e., women do not belong in combat, she was drunk, she wanted it, she didn't say no, women are treated equitably in the Army). For narratives that persist in certain contexts (the military) resistance is only possible through counter-stories, giving a voice to the silenced.

As an institution, the military insists upon uniformity, cohesiveness, fidelity, and adherence to its rules of conduct. However, these institutional narratives often subsume the voices of women as a marginalized population. Likewise, those suffering from Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) have frequently been silenced through military narratives not conducive to being a “trauma victim,” (suck it up, power through it, tough it out, be resilient). As survivors of the physical, psychological, and emotional wounds inflicted during combat, military sexual trauma (MST) survivors suffer double exposure.

Dostie’s account is both tragic and epic. Analyzing her story through a critical feminist lens situates it as “an equal opportunity to participate, to criticize, to express personal aims and attitudes, and to perform these acts without regard to power or ideology” (Walter Fisher, 1985). Dostie’s autobiographical book works rhetorically as an oppositional narrative or counter-story to the dominant narratives of military culture, especially those located inside the frames of war, trauma, and what comes after.

Though Dostie's writing may have been aimed toward catharsis, it is a also an adept critique of the hegemonic masculinity inherent in the Army. Women move about as if unrecognized, and are relegated to 'passing'. They endure violence and harassment in silence. For many who do choose to pursue justice–as Dostie does–the system utterly fails them. For women to be heard in relation to justice, authoring a personal story may be their only recourse, as it subverts canonical narratives while providing empowerment–in effect, it becomes a form of justice.

Ryan Dostie’s masterful–gritty and gutsy–vignettes challenge military narratives of equality opportunity and fair treatment of women. For female veterans, until MST, or more pointedly, military rape is adequately addressed by more responsive military legal action, oppositional narratives may be her only means of achieving a semblance of justice and addressing unseen wounds.

Being an audience for autobiographical accounts of women in service may give us a glimpse into lives that are pushing back in a daily struggle. As veterans, when we share stories and construct new meanings, we are at a site of resistance. When we write we are also at a site of healing. We share from the depths of our souls and write the breadth of our dreams, forging something meaningful from the ashes of our grief and pain. We are transformed from victims to survivors; pawns to warriors. ...more

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Dec 28, 2018 Pamela rated it it was amazing

You don't want to miss it...this is the memoir that will make a huge impact for it gives voice to female veterans and servicewomen.

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Aug 18, 2020 paulinereidbookreviewer rated it it was amazing

Recommends it for: Ellen Read

Recommended to paulinereidbookreviewer by: Ellen Read

Shelves: memoir, war-stories

Book Review/Book Recommendation
Formation
Author - Ryan Dostie

Hardback - 358 pages
Genre - memoir

TRIGGER WARNING - Rape issues and self harm.

My thoughts
I won this book as a giveaway about a year ago, through Instagram/Bookstagram that Kara Harte hosted ......

The first chapter did it for me, like Ryan Dostie, the drink that lured her to her bed, lured me into reading more... I wanted more of this. You know, as I grew to know more about "what really goes on in an army behind closed doors" that blaz ...more

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Jun 21, 2019 Melanie rated it it was amazing

Shelves: memoir, women

I devoured this book in 2 days, living in Ryan's skin, not breathing very well when she couldn't. It's an amazing book, and makes you re-think what you think you know about those first tours in Iraq, PTSD, depression, the simple fact of being female, and how one claws back from trauma. I'm so glad that I saw Aimee Mann's recommendation on Instagram, because I might not have found it otherwise. What an amazing woman, and what an amazing piece of writing.

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Jan 02, 2019 Cassandra Paine rated it it was amazing

Without giving it away, this book is a journey. A journey some may recognize as one like their own, while others may find it somewhat foreign yet still relatable.

You don't have to be military to appreciate this tale. She does a great job breaking down the nuance that might otherwise go over the civilian head.

And the heart of her story is not just about "an incident," but about a life. A life formed by many experiences: many people, many places, and many moments of fear, doubt, confidence, expe ...more

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Dec 19, 2019 Amy rated it it was amazing

If you are looking for a fantastic coming-of-age memoir that will give you SO much to think about, I have the book for you. Formation is the incredible true story of a woman joining the army and leaving behind all that is familiar.

Growing up in a sheltered Christian community, Ryan strikes up a conversation with an Army recruiter (who visits her high school), that leads her to sign up to join the troops.

Ryan is hired as a linguist and finds the environment challenging, as a woman and as som ...more

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Jun 09, 2019 Kara Harte rated it it was amazing

“A few hours before I am raped, two officers in a bar try to corner me and steal my panties.” And with that jarring first line, Formation by Ryan Leigh Dostie begins, hitting the ground running. A lyrically written novel that embodies the Hemingway quote, “There’s nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and open a vein,” Dostie lays bare the deepest depths of herself in this debut memoir. In boldly and candidly telling her truth, Dostie inspires.

Formation dives right into the ...more

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Jun 12, 2019 Dave Wolfe rated it really liked it

Full disclosure: I know the author. I don't think I would have read this book otherwise. Put that fact aside. I was not fully aware of what Ryan went though during her time in the military. In discussions with her over the years, I found out she was raped by a fellow soldier; that the army tried to downplay it; and that she has suffered from PTSD. However, all of this was more like a basic outline of her full story.

Formation captivated me. That was partially due to my friendship with Ryan. But ...more

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Jul 13, 2019 Jeanne rated it it was ok · review of another edition

I finished this book last night. I did not enjoy it at all. I read as a hobby and for entertainment. It's hard for me to 'not like' someone's life or experiences but if you put it in book form and put it out there and sell it, I guess I have the right to not like it. I made myself finish it hoping the poor main character's life would get better and it did, finally after a long torturous journey, but our main character was so beat up and worn down she couldn't tell good from bad or be happy. So s ...more

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Jan 02, 2019 Patricia O'Neill rated it it was amazing

Recommends it for: EVERYONE. Book clubs especially

Stunning. Inspiring. Raw. Real. Read this book.

I received an early copy of Formation and could not put it down. This is a story that needs to be shared. A sharp, honest account of one woman's experiences. She's not a victim or a martyr but a real woman living a real and raw life. The courage and self-reflection it takes to bring this story to the world is awesome. The writing is superb, and draws the reader in to feel and process experiences with the author. It's truth, painful and beautiful.

I ...more

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Mar 18, 2020 Katrina rated it it was amazing

"At the start and end of the work day my rapist and I stand in formation together. This is a certainty. But at least in formation I know where he is. I see him. I mark his space and his distance from mine, a mental measuring tape that I try to stretch as far as allowed. It's the time between those forced encounters that terrorize me though."

Ryan gives a voice to females everywhere in this moving memoir. I found myself letting out my breath when I didn't even know I was holding it. This book will ...more

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Aug 13, 2019 Harold Walters rated it really liked it

Shelves: first-reads

This book should be left behind when soldiers move from place to place so over time hundreds (thousands?) of soldiers get to read it.

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Feb 26, 2020 Bookphile rated it it was amazing

Shelves: feminism, memoirs, non-fiction, 5-star-non-fiction, 2020, kindle-daily-deal

This was such a brutal, savage, uncomfortable read, and I am glad I read it. Dostie's honesty is raw and hard to read at times, but it's also so necessary to furthering our understanding of trauma, rape, and the problematic culture not just of our military, but American culture at large.

Reading about Dostie's assault and its aftermath hurts. It hurts to witness how indifferent the military was to her, how eager it was to bury her report because it just didn't want to deal with it. It hurts to se This was such a brutal, savage, uncomfortable read, and I am glad I read it. Dostie's honesty is raw and hard to read at times, but it's also so necessary to furthering our understanding of trauma, rape, and the problematic culture not just of our military, but American culture at large.

Reading about Dostie's assault and its aftermath hurts. It hurts to witness how indifferent the military was to her, how eager it was to bury her report because it just didn't want to deal with it. It hurts to see how person after person justifies their indifference or waves her assault away. It hurts to read about how often women are treated as less than human, as if the crimes committed against them don't really matter because women themselves don't really matter. I have a difficult time seeing how anyone can read this book and not be shocked by the utter and complete lack of empathy with which Dostie was met in the aftermath of her assault. The sad part is, her story isn't unique either. Women are far, far too often met with this kind of lack of urgency, and it's hard to see what conclusion can be drawn other than that the system simply doesn't care.

Skimming a couple of reviews, I noticed some people saying that this book proves women shouldn't be in the military, and I frankly find that stance alarming. It ignores the harms inflicted not just on Dostie, but on her male counterparts. It ignores the suicide of one of Dostie's male squadmates, ignores what she says about other male soldiers brutally raping Iraqi teenagers. The problem isn't the women in the military, the problem is the military. The problem is the cult the U.S. has built up around its military forces, this idea that everyone who serves is a heroic, G.I. Joe figure. Don't get me wrong, I have massive respect for those who volunteer to defend their country, who give their lives for our experiment in democracy. However, it is very obvious there is a critical problem with our military and the effect it has on those who serve. Statistics prove over and over that far too many service members end up sacrificing both their physical and mental health, and that when they return, access to the services they need and deserve to help them return to civilian life and receive treatments for their injuries is woefully inadequate. Americans need to stop and think about these issues, to question why so many of our veterans end up homeless or commit suicide. The presence of women in the military is not causing this problem. This problem has always existed, it's just that it was largely invisible until the advent of social media and the brave service members who've come forward to share their stories.

Yet fixing military culture will not be possible without also fixing our larger culture. I feel like we're at a watershed moment in our history thanks to the #MeToo movement, which is forcing people to face the many indignities and acts of aggression committed against women. The vast numbers of women who have come forward, like Dostie, make it hard to pretend the problem isn't real, that it's not a big deal, that it doesn't affect all that many women. And it's a problem that is not going to go away until we reckon with the way society views men and women differently, that privileges male power and male privilege over female safety. I think a good example comes from Dostie's belief that had she not been drunk, she could have prevented her assault. It's easy to say women should take steps to protect themselves, because that's easier than facing the real heart of this problem. Women shouldn't have to take steps to protect themselves because men should not rape. How often do men have to worry about getting drunk? How often do they need to stop and wonder if they might end up the victim of an assault? We don't suggest murder victims should have tried harder not to get killed, so I've never understood the argument that rape victims should try harder not to get raped.

The one thing that did bother me about Dostie's memoir, though, was the fat phobia running through it. I understand that in a culture that prize physical prowess and superiority, appearing weak and ineffective is viewed as offensive. However, perpetuating the belief that fat equals lazy and unhealthy in all cases and that thin equals active and healthy in all cases is problematic. Dostie's trauma manifests itself in a lot of ways, but her physical abuse of her own body through her extreme dieting and exercise regimen is cause for concern. It also bothered me that being fat was equated with being unattractive. In many ways, this whole attitude is part of the umbrella of sexism under which women live, because messages about how women ought to look physically are just one aspect of the myriad ways in which women are policed.

I certainly wish Dostie's book had a fairy tale conclusion, that she was able to say that all her problems have been resolved and she now lives a carefree life, but I very much appreciated that she provided an accurate window into the reality of living with a mental illness. We like to think it's possible to just fix everything by taking a pill or doing meditation or going through therapy, but it's important to understand the complexities of mental illness. Like any other chronic illness for which there are no cures (asthma and MS, just to give two examples), managing the condition is the only real option. Medication and therapy and exercise and a healthy diet can help, but they can't fix the problem, and it's important for there to be realistic portrayals of what it means to live with an illness.

This is a simply stunning book, and I hope it ends up in the hands of many, many readers. ...more

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Jun 19, 2019 Anne S rated it it was amazing

Shelves: 2019-read

This book caught my attention, grabbed my attention and kept it through the entire book!
This is the story about a young woman who joined the Army to become a Japanese Linguist, only to be told she was going to be learning Persian Farsi. For those of you who don't know, the Army will promise you lots but "the needs of the Army come first" and where you end up, you end up!

She gets to Ft Sill, Oklahoma and ends up getting raped by a fellow soldier, only to be told by her higher command, it didn't h This book caught my attention, grabbed my attention and kept it through the entire book!
This is the story about a young woman who joined the Army to become a Japanese Linguist, only to be told she was going to be learning Persian Farsi. For those of you who don't know, the Army will promise you lots but "the needs of the Army come first" and where you end up, you end up!

She gets to Ft Sill, Oklahoma and ends up getting raped by a fellow soldier, only to be told by her higher command, it didn't happen. It was her fault. "You don't ruin to a guy's career do you?" You don't ask like someone who has been raped! What the F--? is that supposed to mean.

She holds on and continues on to finish out her time in the Army by going over to Iraq right after 9/11/01. She goes and does her duty in spite of not being believed, being the butt of the jokes, and being a woman in a mostly male cadre.

This book is amazing because she is able to tell us what she went through, how the Army hid her rape and tried to say it didn't happen and what that incident did to her, both while she was in the Army and once she was out.

This book should be required reading of everyone in the military service and shows us why rapes should be taken outside the chain of command so that deviants can be held accountable for their crimes.

One thing (in the middle of the book) that I appreciated is that the women were supposed to wear their overshirts when they went to take showers or pee because they might excite the men if they just wore their tshirts! The men, on the other hand, were able to walk around in the compound with just their tshirts. That is, until a woman who had rank over their ranking captain told the men they also had to wear their overshirts to go pee and use the showers if the women did. It didn't take very much time until they (all the soldiers both men and women) were able to walk around camp in their tshirts!

Thank you Ryan for showing us your spirit and rising above it. You are truly an inspiration. Keep on writing!
...more

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Jul 23, 2019 Rebecca Reynolds rated it it was amazing

Dostie's memoir is well written with an important message. Actually, many important messages. It's a book about rape. It's a book about war. It's a book about PTSD. If you have been raped or otherwise sexually assaulted, this book is important because it lets you know you're not alone. If you have been deployed in the Army and felt the after effects of deployment, you will know you're not alone. If you have felt a struggle with mental illness, you will know you're not alone. And if you haven't e ...more

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Jan 09, 2019 Kate Arismendez rated it it was amazing

Being a woman stepping into a man’s world is one thing. Being victimized, ignored, lied to by their own leaders is another.
In the Army, the chain of command is supposed to mold the young soldiers, teach them to be obedient, teach them to give and receive respect, and teach them to care for one another. They are the surrogate mother and father to the young soldiers after they enlist. Ryan Dostie’s chain of command failed her when she needed them most.
When Ryan Dostie was raped by a fellow soldi ...more

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May 21, 2019 C. S. rated it it was amazing

Shelves: netgalley, non-fiction

I can count on the fingers of one hand the nonfiction that has made me cry, and Formation is one of them.

Here's the thing. This book is hard to read. It is rough. Not because it's bad, but because it is stunningly, blindingly good. Powerful. So deeply personal it feels intrusive to read it at times. But it tells so many important messages about so many things - rape culture, mental health, fat shaming and fat phobia, the damage that religious purety culture can cause... the general complexity o ...more

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Jul 01, 2020 Lori rated it it was amazing

This story is so much more than the assault she experienced, even though it’s clearly a vein through everything. It’s about women in the military. Combat. Women in combat. And all that comes with it including PTSD.

I’m thankful our book club had this in our list. I wouldn’t have read it otherwise and would have missed out on a lot I never took the time to learn about.

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Feb 02, 2019 Amanda Rogozinski rated it it was amazing

I really couldn't put this book down. It contains so many emotions and a clear-eyed honesty that is surprisingly relatable despite the uniqueness of Ryan's experience, and makes you feel like you know the author. I appreciated that it didn't ring of bitterness or anger for wrongs suffered, but had the maturity of perspective. I expected it to be a feminist rant, but instead it probed good questions.

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Aug 10, 2019 Amy Rene rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Facing my truth

I spent 10 years on active duty before the Army broke me physically and mentally. After getting out 3 months ago, I’ve been processing so many feeling about my own assaults on active duty while carrying the stories of hundreds of military sexual assault survivors I worked with over the years. Everyone in the military should read this book. Everyone who loves someone with PTSD should read this book. Thank you, Ryan, for opening eyes.

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May 18, 2019 Rachel rated it it was amazing

Raw and devastating. Unlike any book I've ever read. I just can't stop thinking about it

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Jun 01, 2019 Jennifer Wagner rated it it was amazing

This is a phenomenal memoir of a woman’s experience in the army. It is smart and complicated and well written. From both a literary and personal perspective it’s utterly compelling.

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Mar 28, 2020 Kelly Pavlik rated it really liked it

Shelves: biography

This book starts off with an event that might make one not want to read it.
If you can make it past that event you get a feeling of the sheltered life and how it impacts one's life in the military.

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Oct 30, 2019 Danielle rated it liked it · review of another edition

A memoir in three acts: the crisis, in which the author endures a terrible sexual assault and is neglected by her command to a degree that, I think, warrants throwing the entire UCMJ book at the whole lot of them; the war, a chaotic interlude in which Dostie shelves her trauma for more than a year to survive in Iraq immediately following 9/11; and the aftermath, in which Dostie must finally confront herself as she navigates the highs and lows of PTSD, both from combat and from rape.

Dostie's sto A memoir in three acts: the crisis, in which the author endures a terrible sexual assault and is neglected by her command to a degree that, I think, warrants throwing the entire UCMJ book at the whole lot of them; the war, a chaotic interlude in which Dostie shelves her trauma for more than a year to survive in Iraq immediately following 9/11; and the aftermath, in which Dostie must finally confront herself as she navigates the highs and lows of PTSD, both from combat and from rape.

Dostie's story is an incredibly important one - for the civilians who don't know what experiencing (sexual assault in) the military is like, and for veterans who have been there, or know someone else who has been there, and know exactly what it's like. I'm glad she wrote it, and I'm glad I read it. But this book wasn't at all easy to read, and not for the reasons that I was expecting (descriptions of rape, PTSD, etc).

The author is so, so insecure: about her military service, her place in the Army and as a combat veteran, her (bizarrely prohibitive) concepts of masculinity and femininity, her PTSD symptoms, her fulfillment of stereotypes of females in the military, her overeager portrayal of her wartime experience (typical of combat support and linguists especially), her own measure of her intelligence and worth, I mean everything. Her insecurity bleeds over every page of the story in a way that generates second-hand embarrassment where sympathy should have arisen instead. Given her background, an absence of confidence is expected and warranted, but in this case it leads to some truly uncomfortable reading.

"Back then," she writes about her time in Iraq, "I was still writhing down in the dirt, begging for a scrap of attention, for someone to validate me." But there is no evidence of change, nothing of maturation or growth, just escalations and deescalations of PTSD-related events, and then the story ends shockingly abruptly: I had a baby and now my suicidal ideations are gone. Or are they? Actually, I'll probably never be better. Thanks for reading!

This might be real and true, but what ought the reader do with it?

This is not to invalidate Dostie's service or any of her experiences. Again, this is an incredibly brave story, well-written if not well-told. The first part of this book is an excellent, heart-breaking retelling of how badly a victim of rape can be treated in the hands of the Army, especially during the time the Army was so unbelievably unprepared to receive and navigate the female experience. But Dostie's need to put her life together neatly in chapters and arcs ultimately only reveals the psychological turmoil she still, unfortunately, seems to suffer. Given her trauma, this isn't a surprise. This story doesn't need a happy ending, but it did need a true one, one that will resonate with the reader, and I don't think that's what we were given - just the overwhelming feeling of, now what? ...more

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Jul 31, 2019 Donna Bijas rated it liked it

Shelves: library-book, non-fiction

3.5 stars. Honestly have mixed feelings about this book. The writing is excellent, very detailed and precise. It’s also really honest and soul-searching. She is an amazing woman, but a rape while in the armed forces, not believed, coupled with PTSD after Iraq and depression made this mind-blowing and I found myself unsympathetic at times which bothered me, particularly after reading the acknowledgement section. It’s certainly worth reading, but it’s not easy and sometimes not enjoyable. I hope s ...more

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Jan 09, 2020 Bree rated it did not like it

Shelves: memoir

Notes:

I hated this book

author confesses several times to various demons she lives with - one in her belly, one on her shoulder, one between her ribs and one in her head

she used to be a Christian but is now enlightened to 'the truth' and worships Ishtar

she is mentally ill and was on this path even before the sexual assault

she uses the f-word and other vulgarities on almost every page to prove how masculine she is along with vile descriptions of her violent imaginations

her book should convince an ...more

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Aug 05, 2019 Lauren rated it it was amazing

Shelves: 2019, favorites

This was an incredible 5+ star read - a book I would recommend to every American. Dostie presents an absolutely infuriating and eye-opening story about her years as a woman in the US Army. She has a fascinating life in general - she grew up in a fundamentalist Christian society (basically a cult) in Massachusetts; she taught herself Japanese as a teenager; joined the military to become a linguist immediately after graduating high school; and learned Persian-Farsi at the military’s Defense Langua This was an incredible 5+ star read - a book I would recommend to every American. Dostie presents an absolutely infuriating and eye-opening story about her years as a woman in the US Army. She has a fascinating life in general - she grew up in a fundamentalist Christian society (basically a cult) in Massachusetts; she taught herself Japanese as a teenager; joined the military to become a linguist immediately after graduating high school; and learned Persian-Farsi at the military’s Defense Language Institute. She joined the army at a time of peace with no war on the horizon, and 9/11 struck while she was studying at DLI. Instead of being sent to the basic training camp where most linguists and army “paper pushers” are sent (Ft. Jackson or “Relaxin’ Jackson” as they call it), she was sent to Ft. Polk, a notoriously tough camp. While at Ft. Polk, she was raped by a fellow soldier.

It is truly disgusting, maddening, and embarrassing to read about her experience afterwards. She did everything "by the book" - reported it almost immediately after, submitted herself to humiliating examinations, photos, test, and interrogations. But the army didn’t think she “acted like a rape victim.” She was gaslit and doubted and laughed at by every one of her superiors, asked if she “really wanted to ruin [her rapist’s] life” by going through with the accusation, given dirty and questioning looks by her fellow soldiers, labeled as “that girl who cried rape,” and subjected to her trauma becoming a joke in company-wide debriefs. Her accusation was found not to be credible and she had to serve in the same company as her rapist, who walked away scot-free.

FORMATION is more than just the story of her rape, although that is a very important part of the book. It is also a story of being one of few woman in the military, particularly in the early 2000s when Iraq and Afghanistan were first invaded. It’s about how Dostie had to be cool with casual sexism, rape jokes, and homophobia. It’s also about what it’s like to be at war, the boredom, the heat, the injuries, the death. Dostie was military intelligence personnel, so she wasn’t on the front lines, but war is war. It’s about her PTSD, unexpected and intense.

Dostie’s writing is beautiful, raw, and real. She’s clearly an excellent writer and I hope she’ll write more in the future. She makes you feel as though you are right there with her. I loved listening to the audiobook, which is narrated by Dostie, and you get to hear her no-nonsense thick Boston accent (she says her own last name “Dawstie”) tell you her experiences straight from the source.

I know there are more women in the military now, and I can only hope that survivors of sexual assault within the army are believed and justice is given.
...more

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Jul 21, 2019 Patricia rated it it was amazing

I was fortunate to win an ARC of FORMATION- A WOMAN'S MEMOIR OF STEPPING OUT OF LINE, otherwise I might have missed out because there are few copies in my library systems, and I don't recall a big publicity push in the reviews that I read. I hope that changes because RYAN LEIGH DOSTIE'S story deserves to be told and she should be appreciated and recognized for what she gave up in order to serve this country as an Army soldier in the first Iraq invasion.

I've never read anything like this. It is I was fortunate to win an ARC of FORMATION- A WOMAN'S MEMOIR OF STEPPING OUT OF LINE, otherwise I might have missed out because there are few copies in my library systems, and I don't recall a big publicity push in the reviews that I read. I hope that changes because RYAN LEIGH DOSTIE'S story deserves to be told and she should be appreciated and recognized for what she gave up in order to serve this country as an Army soldier in the first Iraq invasion.

I've never read anything like this. It is unique. I now think that military women have less chance of equality and fair treatment than civilian women, because their commanding officers tend to think they don't deserve better, and they are forced to endure rather than besmirch the military by looking for justice for themselves.

I haven't read about women in combat in modern wars, other than that there are now women in combat zones. But what exactly do they experience, and how do they live in those circumstances?

Dostie initially enlisted because a recruiter convinced her that her language skills would make her valuable as a Linguist in Military Intelligence, and she would get the opportunity to get a college degree. What she wasn't promised was respect, fair treatment, protection from rape and PTSD.

Basic training means sharing the same mental and physical hardships as the men. She accepted that. But what gives some military men the audacity to reach into their sadistic nature and inflict unnecessary hardships on women soldiers?

Her training was interrupted by 9/11 and off she went to Iraq. Her time there is clearly portrayed so that the reader sees more than news reports chose to convey. It is hard to picture living in the extreme desert heat, wearing fifty pounds of combat gear, without fresh water, electricity, or personal comforts and facilities. Still, she speaks fondly of the locals and personal contacts, such as when mothers brought their young daughters to see for themselves a real-life woman soldier.

After serving her tour of duty, one would think it would mean a return to home, career, and a good life. But like so many combat veterans, there is residual damage in the mind if not the body.

Dostie does not sugar coat her story but lays open her worst mistakes. At times it is raw and harsh. It is a remarkable reading experience, and I highly recommend the book. Women will understand and appreciate, but I hope men will read it and learn.
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Nov 15, 2019 Nancy Kennedy rated it really liked it

Ryan Leigh Dostie was an adventurous young woman who joined the Army as a linguist after spending a year abroad as a student in Japan. She describes herself as a risk-taker, and at every opportunity she tries to prove her standing in the male-dominated world in which she lands. She trains hard, drinks hard, talks tough and soldiers on.

But Ryan is a also a confused young woman who finds it hard to stand up for herself when she lands in dicey situations. She grew up in a sheltered, female-dominate Ryan Leigh Dostie was an adventurous young woman who joined the Army as a linguist after spending a year abroad as a student in Japan. She describes herself as a risk-taker, and at every opportunity she tries to prove her standing in the male-dominated world in which she lands. She trains hard, drinks hard, talks tough and soldiers on.

But Ryan is a also a confused young woman who finds it hard to stand up for herself when she lands in dicey situations. She grew up in a sheltered, female-dominated cult, woefully unarmed to protect herself from predators in the service. The book Ryan has written details the night of her rape and its aftermath. The assault has blighted her entire life, not only because of what it was, but also because of the military's reaction to it (it didn't happen) and the treatment she receives at the hand of fellow soldiers. On top of that, she ends up in a war zone, something she never thought she'd signed up for. Not surprisingly, today she suffers from PTSD and struggles to face each day.

Throughout the book, I was frustrated with the way Ryan seemingly brings on her own troubles -- drinking to excess, dressing provocatively, sleeping around -- all the things that people point out to blame the victim. But, on the other hand, I understand her actions. I also grew up in a strict, fundamental sect, and it leaves you with no inner resources on which to draw. You have no experience of normal friendly relationships with men, so every interaction is fraught with tension and unease. You don't know how to say no, because you've been taught to accommodate. Alcohol has been forbidden, so you let loose at the first opportunity. Ryan was a risk-taker because she was trying to rewrite her story.

Ryan's story is hard to read as she spirals out of control. As a reader, you need to refrain from judging her. What you should pay attention to is Ryan's driving motivation -- she is mortally afraid of being average. She's terrified of living a life with no challenges. It's a motivation I don't fully understand, because I don't share it. But it explains a lot of the author's actions and allows you as a reader to sympathize with her even as she self-destructs. I wish her well as she continues to put her life back together. ...more

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Aug 05, 2019 Matt Fitz rated it really liked it

I've spent most of my legal career in the military's criminal justice realm. Since around 2003, the military has been addressing it's problem with sexual assault in the ranks (slowly...and with mixed reviews and even more mixed results). Books like this that make us take a hard look are important to improving the process. Ms. Dotsie writes an incredible and unembellished account of a sexual assault that is not unlike many similar sexual assaults in the military. The difference is, Ms. Dotsie can ...more

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About Ryan Leigh Dostie

Ryan Leigh Dostie

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Ryan Leigh Dostie is a novelist turned soldier turned novelist. As an Army Persian-Farsi/Dari Linguist in Military Intelligence, she was deployed to Iraq during Operation Iraqi Freedom I and II (2003-2004). She holds an MFA in fiction writing and a bachelor’s degree in History from Southern Connecticut State University. She lives in New Haven, Connecticut, with her husband, her wondrously wild dau ...more

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